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For those who thought the hardest part of Physics 101 was
> > the constant conversion from feet and inches to the metric
> > system, including all its Newtons, Joules, and Watts, here
> > are some other useful conversions:
> >
> > Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter:
> > Eskimo Pi
> >
> > 2000 pounds of Chinese soup:
> > Won ton
> >
> > 1 millionth of a mouthwash:
> > 1 microscope
> >
> > Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement:
> > 1 bananosecond
> >
> > Weight an evangelist carries with God:
> > 1 billigram
> >
> > Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour:
> > Knot-furlong
> >
> > 365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer because it's less filling:
> > 1 lite year
> >
> > 16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone:
> > 1 Rod Serling
> >
> > Half of a large intestine:
> > 1 semicolon
> >
> > 1000 pains
> > 1 kiloahurtz
> >
> > Basic unit of laryngitis:
> > 1 hoarsepower
> >
> > Shortest distance between two jokes:
> > A straight line
> >
> > 454 graham crackers:
> > 1 pound cake
> >
> > 1 million microphones:
> > 1 megaphone
> >
> > 1 million bicycles:
> > 2 megacycles
> >
> > 2000 mockingbirds:
> > two kilomockingbirds
> >
> > 10 cards:
> > 1 decacards
> >
> > 1 kilogram of falling figs:
> > 1 Fig Newton
> >
> > 1000 milliliters of wet socks:
> > 1 literhosen
> >
> > 1 millionth of a fish:
> > 1 microfiche
> >
> > 1 trillion pins:
> > 1 terrapin
> >
> > 10 rations:
> > 1 decoration
> >
> > 100 rations:
> > 1 C-ration
> >
> > 2 monograms:
> > 1 diagram
> >
> > 8 nickels:
> > 2 paradigms
> >
> > 2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale
> > University Hospital:
> > 1 I.V. League
> >
> > 100 Senators:
> > Not 1 decision

Oh... Heehee... HAHAH! Okay... those were great. And I'm not even in physics...
Wait, that was the point...

haha this is very funny

no point just old email, ive got tons like this

Well...? Show us!

ok i will
> > > You don't have to own a cat to appreciate this one....A couple was
> > > dressed and ready to go out for the evening. They Turned on a night
> > light, turned
> > > the answering machine on the phone line, covered their pet parakeet
> > and put
> > > the cat in the backyard. They phoned the local cab company and
> > requested a
> > > taxi. The taxi arrived and the couple opened the front door to leave
> > their
> > > house. The cat they had put out into the yard scoots back into the
> > house.
> > >
> > > They don't want the cat shut in the house because "she" always tries
> > > to eat the bird. The wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes
> > > inside to get the cat. The cat runs upstairs, the man in hot pursuit.
> > >
> > > The wife doesn't want the driver to know the house will be empty. She
> > > explains to the taxi driver that her husband will be
> > >
> > > Out soon. "He's just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother."
> > >
> > > A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab.. "Sorry I took so
> > > long," he says, as they drive away.
> > >
> > > "Stupid b*tch was hiding under the bed. Had to poke her with a coat
> > > hanger to get her to come out! Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to
> > > keep her from
> > > scratching me. But it worked. I hauled her fat a$$ downstairs and
> > threw
> > > her out into the back yard!" The cabdriver hit a parked car...
> > >