Matrix cookie game

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Korri
They had one like this in the OTF only it was with cheeseburgers

what u do is you take a quote from one of the films and you replace one of the words in the quote with the word cookie to make it sound funny

for example.....

you take the blue cookie...u wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe

you take the red cookie...you stay in wonderland and i show you how deep the rabbithole goes

The Ones
the cookies are tunneling to avoid our defence system

JediHDM
I have posted this in another thread, but, here goes...

"The Cookie SMITH has grown beyond your control. You cannot eat him, but i can."
"What if you get full?"
*pulling out knife and fork* "I won't"

Korri
laughing out loud

clavis9495
hehehe

I know COOKIES!!!

If you touch that cookie that hand will never touch anything again.

It is not the cookie that bends...

dave123
"please remove any bakery goods: bread, cookies etc..."

:: neo pulls out bakery ::

"HOLY S!!T"

clavis9495
Get me a cookie

dave123
"i'm going to show them a world you dont want them to see.... a world without cookies"

dave123
:: neo enters the construct ::

"i need cookies...."

-----------------------

"what do you want, smith?"

"haven't figured it out yet? i want everything....."

"would that include a cookie from this pack?"

clavis9495
hehehehehe

forumcrew
cookies, the problem is the chocolate chips

sith_darth_jay
merovingian: bring me the cookie recipe of the oracle... and i will give you back your savior...
trinity: do you want some noodles with that?

GABRIEL05
"Heeeeyyy where's my coo-"

"UNCLE LINK!"

"Hey kids!"

burlyman
what do you need, bedsides vanilla essence?
chips, chocolate chips

burlyman
deja vu - didnt we do this before, but with bananas

GABRIEL05
"It's him"
"the anomoly"
"Do we proceed"
"Yes"
"He is after all"
"only cookie"

realworlddreams
"your other chocolate chips had much more respect"
"okay, you have some cookies"
"the cookie is mine and i see no reason to give it to you"
"look at it, just look at it, baking with everyone around it"
"we are getting hungry""yes, we are"
"you're not a cookie are you?" "chips ahoy! it is a cookie, no doubt about it"
"i need a cookie"
"u always said the cookie was suicide" "then let's hope i was wrong"
"im suupposed to start you out with these operational cookies, which are major boring CHIPS, lets start with, Sugar cookies" "cookie-fu? im going to learn, cookie-fu?"

"i can bake cookies" "show me"

can u tell i was bored?

dragonpisces272
Smith: We're here because of you, Mister Anderson, we're here to take from you what you tried to take from us. Cookies.

Korri
no there was one with cheeseburgers but cookies is so much more appropriate

dragonpisces272
i know, its just soooo matrix laughing out loud

Korri
heehee

dave123
i seem to remember this game b4 (with cookies) in a smith post

"what if one day, the cookies could be baked?
isn't that worth fighting for?
isn't that worth DYING for?"

Matrix_man
Theres no denying cookies, because as we both know, without cookies we would not exist
It is cookies that created us
cookies that connects us
cookies that pulls us
that guides us
that drives us
it is cookies that defines us
cookies that binds us

dave123
heh, good one matrix man big grin

"we need all of the cookies at zion"
"i belive our survivial relies on more than the number of cookies we have"

rysdigital
hahahahahaha, i nearly wet myself reading this thread.

rysdigital
"you have our leave to prepare our cookie by any means necessary."

rysdigital
"every alarm triggers the cookie."
"cookie? did he say cookie?"

burlyman
yeh, on this forum, i found it, here:
http://www.killermovies.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=12181&highlight=quote+battle

Korri
the cookie is better

burlyman
yes and we all know where it started laughing

Korri
laughing out loud

Matrix_man
the meeting is over, return to your exits. cookies are coming.

COOKIES?!

Korri
laughing out loud oh no thats a good one!!

Matrix_man
cookies. it is the quintessential human delusion simultaneously the source of your greatest strength and your greatest weakness

Korri
here take a cookie i promise by the time ur done eating it ull feel rite as rain

oh wait... blink

Matrix_man
once the machines were done with us they started digging again. we made a quick pass to look for cookies. we found one.

ONLY ONE?! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Matrix_man
thats the best one korri! cool

Korri
laughing out loud

free your cookie

Matrix_man
a long time ago i knew what cookies tasted like. i want to remember it. i want to sample it.

Korri
god...i used to eat there....really good cookies

Matrix_man
action..reaction.
cookie..effect.

Korri
its him..the anomaly do we proceed?
yes he is still only a cookie!

rysdigital
if i had to guess, i'd say you're a program from the cookie world.

OR big grin

if i had to guess, i'd say you're a cookie from the machine world.

Matrix_man
the cookie
the cookie reloaded
the cookie revolutions

Matrix_man
we are all victims of causality. i ate too many cookies, now i must take a $ }-{ I ']['

Korri
laughing out loud

if u die in the matrix do u die here too?
the body cannot live without the cookie

rysdigital
no stick out tongue

if you're hungry in the matrix, are you hungry here too?
the body cannot live without the cookie.

cool

Matrix_man
cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie 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cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie cookie

JediHDM
that was uncalled for, Matrix_Man...

Matrix_man
hehehehahahahHAHAHAAAAAAAA

sorry.

big grin

rysdigital
can't believe no one has said this yet ---- (or am i going blind?)

there is no cookie eek!

Matrix_man
that one was so obvious i guess no one thought to put it up.

good job rys

dave123
"i remember, for 100 years we have baked these cookies
and after a century of cooking, i remember that which matters most:
this is zion, AND WE LOVE COOKIES"

dave123
"we bake, only what we're meant to bake"
"then you must bake one more thing... cookies"

dave123
"that would mean a 1/4 million cookies up there"
"that can't be..."
"why not? A cookie for every man, woman and child in zion, that sounds exactly like the thinking of a baker to me"

Matrix_man
hahaha....das a good one!

rysdigital
idd, rofl big grin

dave123
"you've already baked the cookie, now you have to understand it"
"no, i can't, i won't do that"

audioheem
Architect: The function of the Cookie is now to return to the Source, allowing a temporary dissemination of the chocolate chips you carry, reinserting the prime ingredient. After which, you will be required to select from the Matrix 23 cookies - 16 chocolate chip, 7 double chocolate chip - to rebuild the Kitchen. Failure to comply with this process will result in a cataclysmic cookie crash, killing everyone connected to the Matrix, which, coupled with the extermination of Kitchen, will ultimately result in the extinction of the entire cookie race.

dave123
"what if i can't? what if i fail?"
"then the cookies wil fall"

"look past the chocolate coating.... and see your cookie!"

"you can save zion if you reach the cookie jar, and to do that you will need the cookie baker"

my aim in life is to edit the entire matrix scripts to something cookie-based

audioheem
Smith: Mister Anderson! Did you eat my cookies?
Neo: Yeah.
Smith: Well, ****.

dave123
"not impossible... QUADROOPLE chocolate chip"

dave123
"as long as there is a single cookie on that plate, he will never give up, and neither will we"

audioheem
Morpheus: I must ask one of you for help. Some of you believe as I believe. Some of you do not. But those of you that do, know we are nearing the end of our struggle. The prophecy will be fulfilled soon, but before it can be, the Oreo must be consulted.

burlyman
i posted this before

"If you tell me well bake it, I'll believe you"
"We'll bake it. We have to"

burlyman
haha laughing out loud 'the Oreo' laughing

tptmanno1
"Mr. Cookie welcome back, we missed you"

"If there's a chance this cookie can end tonite, isn't that worth fighting ofr? Isn't that worth dying for??"

rysdigital
"Commander Lock demands.... requests your immediate cookie, sir."

dave123
"to an artificial mind, all cookies are virtual"

JediHDM
no, its not an oreo...it is the same type of cookie that the oracle makes, and only that type of cookie...very specific

audioheem
easy tiger.. i thought it was funny embarrasment

priestjim
"They're not so bad...once you get to taste them"

"I can bake cookies"
"Show me"

"Stop trying to feed me and feed me"

"You think that's cookies you're eating now?"

Korri
laughing out loud

audioheem
lmfao, those are golden!

Korri
how do the machines really know what cookies tasted like?

maybe thats why everything tastes like cookies

Matrix_man
laughing out loud

Korri
what r u saying? that i can dodge cookies?

priestjim
"And then something happened. Something I knew it was impossible but it happened anyway. You destroyed me Mr. Anderson. After that I knew the recipe, I knew what I had to do but I couldn't. I didn't. I was compelled to bake, compelled to disobey. And now, here I stand because of you Mr. Anderson. Because of you I am no longer a part of the oven."

"These are back doors aren't they? Oven exits."

"Are you a baker?"
"No"
"The what are you?"

Korri
laughing out loud that smith one is hilarious!!

priestjim
This is the official cookified dialog between Archie-Neo :

The Architect - Hello, Neo.

Neo - Who are you?

The Architect - I am the Baker. I created the Oven. I've been waiting
for you. You have many questions, and although the process has altered your consciousness, you remain irrevocably a cookie. Ergo, some of my answers you will understand, and some of them you will not. Concordantly, while your first question may be the most pertinent, you may or may not realize it is also irrelevant.

Neo - Why am I here?

The Architect - Your recipe is the sum of a remainder of an unbalanced
equation inherent to the warm-up of the oven. You are the eventuality
of an anomaly, which despite my sincerest efforts I have been unable to
eliminate from what is otherwise a harmony of ingredient taste. While
it remains a burden to sedulously avoid it, it is not unexpected, and thus
not beyond a measure of control. Which has led you, inexorably, here.

Neo - You haven't answered my question.

The Architect - Quite right. Interesting. That was quicker than the other cookies.

*The responses of the other Ones appear on the monitors: "Others? What
others? How many? Answer me!"*

The Architect - The oven is older than you know. I prefer counting from
the emergence of one integral anomaly to the emergence of the next, in which
case this is the sixth version.

*Again, the responses of the other Ones appear on the monitors: "Five different recipes? Three? I've been lied too. This is bullshit."*

Neo: There are only two possible explanations: either no one told me, or no one knows.

The Architect - Precisely. As you are undoubtedly gathering, the anomaly's systemic, creating fluctuations in even the most simplistic recipes.

*Once again, the responses of the other Ones appear on the monitors: "You
can't burn me! F*ck you! I'm going to kill you! You can't make me taste like anything!*

Neo - Sugar. The problem is sugar.

*The scene cuts to Trinity fighting an agent, and then back to the
Baker's room*

The Architect - The first oven I designed was quite naturally perfect, it
was a work of art, flawless, sublime. A triumph equaled only by its
monumental failure. The inevitability of its doom is as apparent to me now as a consequence of the imperfection inherent in every cookie, thus I redesigned it based on your recipe book to more accurately reflect the varying grotesqueries of your taste. However, I was again frustrated by failure. I have since come to understand that the answer eluded me because it required a lesser mind, or perhaps a mind less bound by the parameters of perfection. Thus, the answer was stumbled upon by another, an Mama's recipes book, initially created to investigate certain aspects of the cookie taste. If I am the father of the oven, she would undoubtedly be its mother.

Neo - The Flour.

The Architect - Please. As I was saying, she stumbled upon a solution
whereby nearly 99.9% of all test subjects accepted the recipe, as long as they were given sugar, even if they were only aware of the sugar at a near unconscious level. While this answer functioned, it was obviously
fundamentally flawed, thus creating the otherwise contradictory systemic anomaly, that if left unchecked might threaten the system itself. Ergo, those that refused the recipe, while a minority, if unchecked, would constitute an escalating probability of disaster.

Neo - This is about the Patiserie.

The Architect - You are here because the Patiserie is about to be destroyed. Its every tasty cookie bruned, its entire existence radicated.

Neo - Sugarless cookies!

*The responses of the other Ones appear on the monitors: "Sugarless cookies!"*

The Architect - Denial is the most predictable of all cookie responses. But, rest assured, this will be the sixth time we have destroyed it, and we have become exceedingly efficient at it.

*Scene cuts to Trinity fighting a chocolate chip, and then back to the Baker's room.*

The Architect - The function of the One is now to return to the mixer,
allowing a temporary dissemination of the flavor you carry, reinserting the prime recipe. After which you will be required to select from the Oven 23 individuals, 16 chocolate cookies, 7 sour cookies, to rebuild the Patiserie. Failure to comply with this process will result in a cataclysmic system crash killing everyone connected to the Oven, which coupled with the extermination of the Patiserie will ultimately result in the extinction of the entire cookie race.

Neo - You won't let it happen, you can't. You need cookies to survive.

The Architect - There are levels of survival we are prepared to accept.
However, the relevant issue is whether or not you are ready to accept the responsibility for the burning of every cookie in this world.

*The Baker presses a button on a spoon that he is holding, and images of cookies from all over the Oven appear on the monitors*

The Architect - It is interesting reading your reactions. Your five
predecessors were by design based on a similar predication, a contingent affirmation that was meant to create a profound attachment to the rest of your species, facilitating the function of the one. While the others experienced this in a very general way, your experience is far more specific. Vis-a-vis, salt.

*Images of Trinity fighting the chocolate chip from Neo's dream appear on the monitors*

Neo - Trinity.

The Architect - Apropos, she entered the Oven to save your taste at the
cost of her own.

Neo - No!

The Architect - Which brings us at last to the moment of truth, wherein the fundamental flaw is ultimately expressed, and the anomaly revealed as both beginning, and end. There are two doors. The door to your right leads to Mama's cookies book, and the salvation of the Patiserie. The door to the left leads back to the Oven, to her, and to the end of your species. As you adequately put, the problem is choice. But we already know what you're going to do, don't we? Already I can see the chain reaction, the chemical precursors that signal the onset of emotion, designed specifically to overwhelm taste, and hardness. An emotion that is already blinding you from the simple, and obvious truth: she is going to be burned, and there is nothing that you can do to stop it.

*Neo walks to the door on his left*

The Architect - Humph. Honey, it is the quintessential cookie delusion,
simultaneously the source of your greatest strength, and your greatest
weakness.

Neo - If I were you, I would hope that we don't meet again.

The Architect - We won't.

Korri
bravo rock

Matrix_man
someone had a lot of time on their hands...

priestjim
No I found the dialog ready. I just adapted it smile It took me only 10'

Matrix_man
smile very clever

priestjim
Just trying to reach JediHDM's and Omegas IQ smile

Matrix_man
haha

dave123
"run neo, run"
*neo faces stairs and turns round to Smith, both run at each other, throwing cookies at each other, they enter "cookie time" (c) and cookies wizz past the screen in slow motion"
"you're full"
".... so are you"
*they fight, neo starts to lose*
"that is the sound of inevitability, mister anderson, that is the sound of muffins...."
"i.... like... COOKIES"

JediHDM
dave> HAHAHA...very good...or should i say, doubleplusgood?!

Korri
Llaughing out loudL

priestjim
"You take the muffin, you wake up in your bed and believe what you want. You take the cookie, and I'll show you how deep the rabbit hole goes".

xcats5
What is today, is it the monday or thursday in the matrixs

audioheem
Today? Monday the 20th October dude...

sith_darth_jay
does today date have anything to do with the matrix?

JediHDM
im wondering what he said...

Korri
blink rrrite...

priestjim
You see, you know you can't stand drinking, why do you continue doing it?

audioheem
laughing out loud

dave123
agent: "no captain, those orders were for your own protection"
captain: "i think we can handle one little cookie"
agent: "no captain, your men are already bloated"

dave123
"i ask that one ship stay behind, in case the bakers make a fresh batch"

dave123
"72 hours... thats how long the plate of cookies lasted last time....."

Ghost : Can you tell me what happened to you?
Oracle : Two programs that I trusted sold the termination code of my original shell to the Merovingian.
Ghost : Why did they do that?
Oracle : For cookies. For the chocolately goodness in each one.
Ghost : You knew about it, and yet you let it happen?
Oracle : I had to.
Ghost : Why?
Oracle : Because the cookies are tasty. I can't tell you why, but I believe one day, the cookie will change both our world and your world forever.
Ghost : Is that why you called for me?
Oracle : No. I just got bored and needed someone to talk to.
Ghost : ...


I REALLY need to stop making these quotes big grin

JKozzy
laughing out loud dave, you're too funny.... keep 'em coming
What a great thread.... can anyone tell me how exactly this whole cookie theory started?

dave123
101st post! woot

priestjim
Ghost : Is that why you called for me?
Oracle : No. I just got bored and needed someone to talk to.

laughing out loud laughing out loud laughing out loud laughing out loud

"The Smith cookie is grown beyond you control. You cannot stop it. But I can"
"And if you fail?"
"Well we have muffins as well"

FallenForever
lol, you guys this thread is really good. thanks for starting it korri. i have just read 6 pages of it, some of them are really funny

"If we fail to bake the cookies, Neo wont get any. And that cannot happen at any cost."

gmpho
Cookie Smith-"I had a revelation during my time here, it occured when i was trying to classify your cookies.You see cookies are not actually mammals.Mammals, have a natural equilibrium with their surroundings, yet you cookies do not.You multiply and multiply and multiply, until their are no cookies left.
Their is one other organism on this planet, Morpheus, who shares that same characteristic.Do you know what it is?A cookie, cookies are a cookie, a cookie , a cookie of this planet. And we are the cookie..."
Phew..
cookie overload.And thats just my first post!!

JediHDM
Welcome.

audioheem
Lol, nice. laughing out loud Cookie OverKILL is more like it

dragonpisces272
cooookie!! lets all just sit down and have a cookie big grin

Plasma
'I know because I came looking for the muffin, but when he found me he told me I wasn't really looking for a muffin. I was looking for an cookie'- Trinity

'The Matrix is a bakery-generated snackworld built to keep us over weight in order to change a human being into this'- Morpheus

MORPHEUS LIFTS UP A DOUBLE CHOC CHIP COOKIE


'I hate this cookie. This snack. These choc chips. This substance, whatever you want to call it, I can't stand it any longer. It's the smell, if there is such a thing. I feel saturated by it. I can taste their stink and every time I do, I fear that I've somehow been infected by
it'- Smith


'She told you exactly what you needed to hear. That's all. Sooner or later, Neo, you're going to realize just like I did the difference between baking the cookie and eating the cookie'- Morpheus

rysdigital
lol you got some nice ones in there Plasma laughing out loud

priestjim
really good ones Plasma :P laughing out loud

Celsius
The machines created the matrix to turn an ordinary human in to this *holds up cookie*

What do you want?
What all men with cookies want......MORE cookies.


Myy name is neo!
Yes...I am the cookie maker.

What is a coockie? If a cookie is something we can see taste and touch, the a cookie is simply electrical symbols interprited by our brain.

Celsius
LMAO!!! Plasma, those are great! laughing out loud Well done.

Celsius
No! You do not truely know a cookie until you eat it.

dave123
There is some muffin in your cookie,
and some cookie in your muffin.
To get the cookies, you must risk everything.

Cookies can be a pretty scary thing for some people. They must've been cold and alienating for a boy like that.

Neo: I didn't bake them kid. You baked them yourself.

Korri
laughing out loud

Plasma
some more...

'Because you've eaten that cookie, Neo. You already know that cookie. You know exactly where it ends' -Trinity

'Neo, this is loco. They've got Morpheus in a white chocolate encased cookie. Even if you somehow ate your way inside, those are agents baking him. Three of them! I want cookies, too, but what you are talking about is obesity'- Tank

'For the longest time, I wouldn't believe it. But then I saw the
ovens with my own eyes, spreading in every direction for miles. Inside the mixing bowl, I watched them cut up morsels of innocents chocolate so they could be mix, expertly, to the dough and standing there, facing the efficiency, the pure, horrifying obviousness of the truth'- Morpheus

'This cookie is one of the top software cookies in the cookie
because every single cookie understands that they are part of a cookie. Thus, if a cookie has a problem, the cookie has a problem'- Rhinehart

More??

Korri
HILARIOUS!!

JediHDM
HELL YEAH!!!

Plasma
'It seems that you have been eating two cookies. In one cookie, you are Thomas A. Cookieeater, program writer, baker, for a respectable software, cookie-making company. You have a bag of flour, a social security number, you pay your taxes, you have chocolate chips and you help your landlady carry out her garbage'- Smith

'You're the Cookie, Neo. You see, you may have spent the last few years baking for me, but I've spent most of my life baking for you'- Morpheus

'I can see it in your eyes. You have the look of a man who accepts what he sees because he is expecting to find a cookie'- Morpheus

'Because I don't like the idea that I'm not in control of my Cookie'- Neo



Have you ever had a dream, Neo, that you were so sure was a cookie? What if you were unable to resist that cookie, Neo? How would you know the difference between the dream world and the cookie world?'- Morpheus

A cookie world-oh the dreams im gonna have..

Thats all for now!

Tell me if you want more and ill see what my twisted little mind can conjure!

Plasma

Korri
Thomas A. Cookieater....classic laughing out loud

FallenForever
rolling on floor laughing o my gosh plasma, those are hilarious!!!!!!!

dave123
Don't be controlled by your fear, Neo. There are only two ways out of this building. One is that scaffold. The other is is with a cookie. You take a chance either way. I leave it to you.


The other life is lived in cookies where you go by the baking alias 'Mr Kipling', and are guilty of virtually every baking crime we have a law for, including the unauthorized use of the N.H.S. system for the insertion of purified sugar.
AGENT SMITH One of these lives has a future. One of them does not.
I'm going to be as forthcoming as I can be, Mr. Cookieeater . You are here because we need your help.
We know that you have been contacted by a certain individual. A baker who calls himself 'Hovis'. Whatever you think you know about this baker is irrelevant to the fact that he is wanted for acts of cookie-terrorism in more countries than any other man in the world. He is considered by many authorities to be the most dangerous man alive.
AGENT SMITH My colleagues believe that I am wasting my time with you, but I believe you want to do the right thing. It is obvious that you are skilled baker, Mr. cookieeater, and that you are interested in the future of their glorous goodness. That is why I believe you are ready to put your past mistakes behind you and get on with your life.
AGENT SMITH We are willing to wipe the slate clean, to give you a fresh start and all we are asking in return is your cooperation in bringing a known terrorist to justice.
MR KIPLING Yeah. Wow. That sounds like a real good deal. But I think I have a better one. How about I give you a cookie -- and you can cram that baking oven up your Secret Service sphincter.

dave123
"its like wiping your ass with cookies"

"being me the eyes of the orcale, and you can have your cookies"

*Neo wakes up in Limbo"
HOLY SHIT WHERE THE COOKIES AT?

rysdigital
lol stick out tongue

audioheem
lmfao dave u rock!

Plasma
SPOON BOY (SKINNY BOY): Do not try to bake the cookie. That is impossible. Instead, only try to realize the truth.

NEO: What truth?

SPOON BOY: That there is no flour.

Neo nods, staring at the spoon.

NEO: There is no flour.

SPOON BOY: Then you will see that it is not the cookie that bakes. It is only the flour.

'No? Let me tell you what I believe. I believe that cookie means more to me than he does to you. I believe that if you are serious about baking it then you are going to need my help and since I am the ranking baker in this pattiserie, if you don't like it, then I believe that you can go to hell, because you aren't going anywhere else'- Trinity

'Every muffin in this bakery instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with the fat shoppers. But you cookies do not. You move to an area and you induce obesity every natural thought of exercise is consumed and the only way you can survive is to be rebaked to the same receipe.'- Smith

'This is a recipe program, similar to the programmed reality of a cookbook. It has the same basic ingredients. ingredients like chocolate. What you must learn is that these ingredients are no different than the ingredients of a muffin. some can be healthy. Others, not.'- Morpheus

Plasma
Applause applause to Dave for continuing the plight of Thomas A Cookieater aka Chip, hes had a tough six months- with his revoulutions about his postion as the Bun- the prohecised baker! Only he can free the Cookies from the oprresion of the Muffins!

Where does this S**t come from?

Plasma

dave123
*smith holds a cookie to morpheus*
Agent Smith: Have you ever stood and stared at it, Morpheus? Marveled at its beauty. Its genius. Billions of people just living out their lives... oblivious.

Tank: So what do you need? Besides lots of guns?
Neo: Cookies. Lots of cookies.

Neo: I tihnk we should inject PURIFIED CARAMEL into the next batch, then add the dark triple chocolate.
Trinity: Neo... noone has ever done anything like this.
Neo: That's why it's going to work.

Trintity: You said that eating four packets of cookies was suicide.
Morpheus: "Let us hope then, that I was wrong"

Merovingian: "Cookies?? What cookies?? I wasn't eating any cookies."
Persephone: "You wern't eating them with your mouth, my love."
^^^ Yeah, I slightly scared myself when I typed that big grin

audioheem
lmfao

Plasma
I think that should be added to the classics list!

im scared too!

confused

Plasma
Trinity: Do you know what happened to the cookie?

Oracle: It is trapped in a place between this bakery and my stomach.

Neo: Who are you?



Bane: Look past the crunchy flesh, and see your chocolatey enemy.

Neo: Its imposible- White Chocolate?

Bane: Ineveitable, Dark and Milk!



Smith: Mr Cookieater, welcome back

Neo: I eat you tonight!



Morpheus: Youve never eaten a cookie

Niobe: I still won't

Niobe: I believe in the recipie

dave123
Neo: Hiya, fellas.
It's him
The Baker.
Do we proceed?
Yes.
He is still...
...only human.
*Neo bits Cookie 1's arm*
Neo: Mmmm.... choc chip

Smith: We're here because of you, Mister Anderson, we're here to take from you what you tried to take from us. Cookies.
Neo: You want your cookies back? Well I ate them all.... with a certain satisfaction, I might add.
Smith: F**k you!!
*Smith tries to pull cookies out of Neo's stomach*
Neo: HAHAHAH, TOO WEAK, BIATCH
Smiths 1 through 5346987: GIVE US THE COOKIES!
*All the Smith try to beat up Neo for the cookies, whilst Smith number 435 takes over some woman for her groceries, he runs off and eats the cookies in her bag*
Smith 3249: More....
*Everyone in the world... no, no... UNIVERSE allows themselves to be taken over so they can get some cookies, and they all fight Neo, instead they get a pole to the head. Eventually, everyone jumps on top of Neo, hoping to make his stomach EXPLODE!!!!!! and release the cookies. This, fails, and Neo flies off, and laughs at the Smiths on the floor*
Neo: Look, Smith 435 has cookies!
*As everyone turns round Neo runs away*

priestjim
You guys are professional! lmao!!! laughing out loud

dave123
Roland: Once the machines were done with us, they started digging again. We made a quick pass to look for cookies.
Link: You found one?
Roland: Only one.
Link: Can I see?
Roland: Well, the thing is..... I got kinda hungry and....

Korri
more.....cookies!!

mors823
A little late, but I was in the mood for something funny. It's not perfect, but should be good. Enjoy!

Smith/Oracle: Why, Mr. Anderson, why? Why, why do you do it? Why, why eat? Why keep chewing? Do you believe you're eating for something, for more than your cookie? Can you tell me what it is, do you even know? Is it chochlate chip or oatmeal, perhaps peanut butter- could it be sugar cookies? Illusions, Mr. Anderson, vagaries of perception. Temporary constructs of a feeble human intellect trying desperately to justify an existence that is without meaning or purpose. And all of them as artificial as the Matrix itself. Although, only a human mind could invent something as insipid as love. You must be able to see it, Mr. Anderson, you must know it by now! You can't eat, it's pointless to keep biting! Why, Mr. Anderson, why, why do you persist?

Korri
laughing good one!

mook
"what do you need?"

"cookies - lots of cookies!"


or

"unfortunately no one can be...told what flavour the cookie is...they have to taste it for themselves."

Korri
i cant really think of any rite now

mors823
Thanks Korri. There's one more line I wanted to add, Neo's

Neo: Because I'm hungry!

Attach that to the end of my 1st post and enjoy.

Korri
laughing too funny

HannaBananabal
Smith: "Like the dinosaur. Look out that window. You haad your time. The future is... our world, Morpheussss, the future is... our time."

Morpheus: *mouth full* "Ok, sure. Want a cookie?"

Smith: "Mmmm, yeah."

Korri
cookies! big grin

mailedbypostman
"Cookies.Lots of cookies."
"I know cook-ies."
"Why Mr. Anderson? Why get up?Why keep fighting?do you even know? Is it for justice? Is it for trust? Or is it for cookies? Thought only a human mind could create something as insipid as cookies."

mors823
Zee: What would Tank say?
Caus: Make cookies!
laughing out loud

Trinity_Matrix
hah, these are great!

Morpheus: I have baked a cookie, but now that cookie is gone from me.

Trinity: Is Neo okay?
Link: Okay? Shit, Morpheus, you should have seen him.
Morpheus: Where is he now?

Link: He's doin' his cookie thing.

Neo: Hm, cookies.

Seraph: The Oreo has many cookies, I had to be sure.
Neo: Of what?
Seraph: That you were The Chocolate Chip.
Neo: You could've just asked.

Morpheus: What can you see, Neo?
Neo: It's strange, the flour is somehow different.
Trinity: Is that good for us or bad for us?
Neo: Well, it looks like every floor is wired with cookies.
Trinity: Bad for us....wait, no, that's good!

Persephone: ...just a sample.
Trinity: How about you sample this?


The Oracle: So, let's get the obvious stuff out of the way.
Neo: You're not a cookie, are you?
The Oracle: Well, it's harder to get much more obvious than that.

Neo: So we need chocolate chips, and chocolate chips need us. Is that your cookie?
Councillor Harmann: No, no cookie. Old men like me don't bother in making cookies. There is no cookie.
Neo: Is that why there are no young men on the council?
Councillor Harmann: Good cookie.

mailedbypostman
There was a man that could manipulate the cookies as he saw fit. He could even change the color, and change the horrible Smith cookie into the awesome oracle cookie.

mors823
This came from the Hugo Weaving thread, and this maybe already on here, but it combine the best of both worlds (Smith+Cookies)



laughing laughing laughing laughing

mailedbypostman
laughing laughing laughing laughing laughing

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