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Is neo alive or dead at the end...also one of my friends thought that neo was a program...not a human...did i miss that whole part or what?

No you diddnt miss anything. Neo was without a doubt human. Whoever told you he is a program diddnt understand the movie. Even though they dont give you a direct answer weather neo is alive or dead. The facts they did give you lead you to the fact that he did indeed die, atleast in his physical form. I believe the wachowski brothers left the ending open for you to decide though.

I must first say that I am SO disappointed with the ending. How they could leave it such an open ended movie and tell everyone that there will only be 3 is horrible to do to fans.

As far as Neo goes, my theory is that he was absorbed into the Matrix. His body is dead, but his image is still alive.... where it will turn up, who knows.

I was kinda hoping he and Trinity would be the "new" Merovingian and Persephone (which I didn't think made a big enough impression in Revo either.....)

The only thing I was really disappointed about was what PeresphonePlotter touched on, that Mero didn't make a big impression in the movie -- but I know why he didn't. To do so would have needed atleast one more movie so that they could elaborate on his character and where he came from - especially with a name that suggests that he is a decendant, is a result of, or is, indeed, a copy of a previous anomaly.

However, Neo is dead. Smith copied himself over Neo - but absorbed who Neo is. Thus, the Neo version of Smith was not whole, but was root. Does that make sense? Anyway, the machines then overloaded Neo's body with power and basically electrocuted him through his own nueral network. He was then layed down in a very symbolic manner and pulled onto the machine pad that carried him to a burial of sorts probably. This can also be inferred by foresights in the beginning of Revo - when Neo takes his time he is collecting himself to give his life if he must. He says farewell goodbye's to everyone "Neo: It was an honor serving with you sir. Morpheus: No, the pleasure was all mine." Both Neo and Trin realize that they are not coming back (most likely) as they both are terrified. And Morpheus's comment saying "As long as there is a single breath in his body he will not give up..."

Those are all foresights writers use to indicate someone will die. Also, when the machines kill him, his body is not evident in the matrix, but the Oracle's is. That's because the Smith Neo was fighting was the Oracle-Smith, and thus the most powerful Smith. You don't see Neo because he is unplugged and braindead, there is nothing left to transmit to the Matrix...

in the end, Neo saw that he wouldnt hav a lover anymore and there was no point of living, so he knew wut would happen if he was taken over, and he ended the war. good enough for me

Indeed, Neo had nothing left to live for except for end the war.