The Family unit

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mechmoggy
Been trying for a while now to map out all you regulars into a family unit. Here's how far I've got....

The dads gotta be RC, he's really "dadsy".

Gundy's a real "momsy" character, always got love and stuff for people feeling ill or low.

Then we've got nutty aunt Edna and Dim, the kind of cool aunts who'd take you for a tattoo on your 18th b'day or you'd see em' having drinking competitions in your local pub.

Drunken uncle Finti, always the 1st to get drunk at family gatherings and sing songs that no-one else has ever heard.

Big dopey cousin queeq, the kind of relative who's past alcohol and drug abuse has left them with a strange outlook on things - kinda like Pheobe from Friends.

Serious uncle Ush, who's always there to help with homework and occasionally goes wild and AWOL for a week on some crazy ass adventure.

And great grandad Raz, just full of useful info and pearls of wisdom!

Not meant to be serious, agrue with my assumptions or add yourself to the family unit if your not there already. big grin

ToMacco
Hmm. And I guess yerssot, Tex and myself just arn't worth mentioning, huh? You bastard! big grin

Gundark
Ah, Mech...seems you've forgotten ToMacco.

Dim
I think they would be the younger brothers of the family..

ToMacco
*ToMacco cracks a beer, questions finti's alcohol problem*

Ratcat
If I'm the daddy and Dim is an aunty, does that make her my sister??? eek!

Dim
Hmmm..ewwwwwwwww!!!! I think we might to rethink this..

Ratcat
You can be Gundy's sister...

Hey, wait a minute, if I'm the daddy and Gundy's the mummy.

All Right!!!!!

big grin big grin big grin

ToMacco
Ahh, Sibling Rivalry!

Ratcat
ToMacco, you REALLY don't want to worry about it. laughing out loud

ToMacco
Hey, I'm stayin' out of this one! wink

Gundark
*hugs RC as he comes in the door and hands him a cup of coffee* Well, hello dear how was your day ? *snuggle snuggle* I have the best husband in the whole world !!!!



*hands finti barf bag with little tiggers on it*

ToMacco
*ToMacco enters, starts smacking people*

Dim
*worried*
This is almost as weird as my real family..

ToMacco
If we're all a family, then we are pretty disfuntcual! big grin

Gundark
I thought WE were your REAL family. *sob* sad

ToMacco
eek! eek! eek! big grin

Dim
Seems like it some times.

ToMacco
So what are your impressions of me?

queeq
"Big dopey cousin queeq", hmmmm, does that mean my relationship with Gundy is incestuous? big grin

Dim
Yep..

mechmoggy
Okay, okay...

Yers can be the eldest (most mature), ToM can be the middle child (due to the severe "middle child syndrome"wink and Tex is the youngest (Gets away with murder).

Phew, this is harder than I imagined!

queeq
Now you know how your father felt. big grin

ToMacco
laughing out loud

Ratcat
And you thought the Addams Family were scary... laughing out loud

Texas
In this family unit, I'll be the kid who is too embarrassed to admit that any of his family members are related to him. stick out tongue
wink

finti
or the other way around

yerssot
the truth is known!

mah
i won't ask for much, but can I be the dog confused smile

yerssot
no you can't To is already one!
But we can have two if you want?

queeq
We're still short of a gerbil. How about that?

Dim
Ahhhhhh..mah would be a cute gerbil big grin

queeq
But I don't know if mah'd like being squished by your hugs.

Dim
I'll be gentle *pets mah on the head*

queeq
*calls gerbil coroner*

Dim
NOOOOo..I'm gentle, see.
*pats queeq's head*

queeq
*calls queeq coroner*

Dim
BOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOO!!!! sad sad sad

I KILLED MY FRIEND *sob*

Ratcat
NO GERBALS!

The father opf the house has spoken... cool

queeq
http://www.freakygamers.com/smilies/s/otn/angels/lily.gif

mah
okay, i'll just be the fly on the wall smile

queeq
I'm sure she kills those too.

Dim
*wouldn't hurt a fly*

queeq
Yes you would.

Dim
Pft..you don't know

queeq
Well, yes.

Ratcat
She would... roll eyes (sarcastic)

queeq
I know...

Ratcat
And she likes to pull flowers to bits as well.

Ushgarak
a. Edna is more a sister than an Aunt, Honestly.

b. You make me out to be far too interesting. I would cut out the crazy ass adventures bit.

ToMacco
Ush is the serious one. Or the "wise" one maybe

Or maybe he's just a wise ass! big grin wink j/k Ush

Texas
Wise yes, serious no. You should hear some of his apostrophe jokes. big grin

ToMacco
Hmmmmm. . . I won't hold my breath. rolling on floor laughing

finti
Please do, lets see how long it takes before you get blue in the face.

ToMacco
finti- i'M ALREADY BLUE IN THE FACE. yOU HAVE TO REMEMBER THAT i LIVE IN mINNESOTA. i'TS F@#*ING COLD OVER HERE! rIGHT NOW IT'S 28 DEGREES! sad sad sad

finti
That aint cold, and try not to write capital letters all the time.

ToMacco
nO, THAT'S NOT VERY COLD. tHERE ARE TIMES IN mn WHEN THE WIND CHILL IS NEAR 65 DEGREES BELOW ZERO! nOW THAT'S COLD!!!!!!!!!!!!! eek!

queeq
You don't have to yell, we're not deaf.

Ush should be the wise old heremit that lives high up in the mountains, we go to him for advice.

ToMacco
HA HA HA! laughing out loud laughing out loud laughing out loud

gO TO Ush FOR ADVICE? tHAT'LL BE THE DAY!!! wink

queeq
It will at least SOUND wise. big grin

ToMacco
laughing out loud laughing out loud laughing out loud

mechmoggy
And now for the truely shocking skeleton in the closet of this family - me!

Picture the scene.....

Approx. 25 years ago a fresh faced Gundy is in Britain on an student exchange course to study the difference between "The American method of producing killer cyborgs from human remains and aluminum robot parts" and "The British method of producing killer cyborgs from human remains and aluminium robot parts".

Cut scene to a young scruffy looking queeq...

Finding himself in Britain after some crazy drug session, our beloved queeq begins shipping spice around Britain in his ship. (The ship being a bread van and the spice being chinese five spice).

One drunken night these two met up in a bar and after some smooth talking from the queeqer (and lots of alcohol) the two share a night of passion. True to form, queeq high-tails it away in the morning without so much as a thank you note or a forwarding address.

Gundy, recently married to on Ronald Arthur Tixybell Cat (later known as Ratcat, later still known as RC), doesn't tell anyone about the pregnancy and has the baby in secret and leaves the child in a small Cadbury's Hot Chocolate tin outside the local parish and herself high-tails it back to the US.

24 years on I have pieced together this info after years of painstaking research. I first suspected I was thier love child after I felt an constant urge to cause Mayhem by quoting random Monty Python sketches.

The end. big grin

Dim
He's learned the truth! eek! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!! HE's gonna reek Havok now!

mechmoggy
Oh, it's too late - I'm already reeking! laughing out loud

Ratcat
Queeq, I thing WE need to have a little chat... mad I think you owe Gundy and I 25 years of child support maintainance...

Dim
Hmmmm..how..you're old RC.

Ratcat
Yeah, seems that way, doesn't it...

Ushgarak
To- the chances of you beating Norway for how cold it gets are VERY low...

yerssot
and the chances of rain in England and Belgium?

queeq
*wears raincoat, hat and moustache*

Hello, what a nice place this is. Hi, I'm all new here. Who are you nice people?

*winks at Gundy: some plastic surgeon you have!*

mechmoggy
Tut tut, such a poor excuse for a disguise - you look like a copper for gods sake. big grin

Dim
Actually I was thinking of a flasher but okay.

mechmoggy
Please don't give him ideas Dim. eek!

queeq
As long as Dimmy doesn't tell us ALL her fantasies, I'm okay with it. big grin

Gundark
*studies queeq's disguise* Inspector Clouseau ?

queeq
Ah no, you don't know me. You never met me, we never had se...err..... You don't know me... embarrasment

Gundark
*sniffs queeq's neck* Hmmmm.....that cologne is so familiar.....it smells like......

queeq
*quickly* No, it doesn't. big grin

Gundark
Old Spice ? Tulips ? Bantha poodoo ?

queeq
Nonononononononononono.

Gundark
(best Winona Ryder voice) Who are you ? I know you.

CUT TO

Wolf pacing through cinemagraph.

queeq
ROOOOAAAAAAAAAAARRRR big grin

Gundark
That was a tiger roar, not a wolf.

Dim
*falls to the ground laughing* He doesn't even know what kind of sound a wolf makes?!?! laughing out loud

queeq
WOOF?

Dim
That'll do roll eyes (sarcastic)

queeq
ROOAARR is more sexy. wink

Dim
How about a howl? rolling on floor laughing

queeq
Oh that's a good one. I can do that while hanging naked on the chandelier.

HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! evil face

mechmoggy
And who said romance was dead, eh? roll eyes (sarcastic)

queeq
Hey, that's only the tip of the iceberg. big grin

Dim
Have I told you that you scare me today?

queeq
Not yet. Go ahead, dear. big grin

Dim
You scare me....very much.. See!! *holds up her arm* I have goosebumps!

queeq
Cute. Can I touch them? big grin

Dim
Not when you say it like that.. laughing out loud

Gundark
Its all they ever think about.

finti
No evil face

Gundark
Thats not very convincing.

finti
Yes it is evil face

Gundark
Okay. Besides sex and music, what else do you think about finti ?

finti
beer big grin

mechmoggy
Mmmmm beer.

If I'm not drinking it - I'm thinking about drinking it! big grin

Dim
laughing out loud On that note...I think this one's done.

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