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We’re all fans of the LotR trilogy. But for those who are NOT, to survive opening night, among costume-clad fans, observe the following.


1. Do NOT stand up halfway through the movie and yell loudly, "Wait... where the hell is Harry Potter?"
2. Do NOT block the entrance to the theater while screaming: "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" - After the movie, do NOT say "Lucas could have done it better."
3. At no point during the movie, should you stand up and shout: "I must go! Middle Earth needs me!" and run and try to jump into the screen.
4. Do NOT Play a drinking game where you have to take a sip every time someone says: "The Ring."
5. Do NOT Point and laugh whenever someone dies.
6. Do NOT Ask the nearest ring-nut if he thinks Gandalf went to Hogwarts
7. Do NOT Finish off every one of Elrond's lines with "Mr. Anderson." (I moderate the Matrix Forum and shall instruct my crew to behave themselves )
8. When Aragorn is crowned king, do NOT stand up and at the top of your lungs sing, "And I did it.... MY way...!"
9. At the end do NOT, complain that Gollum was offensive to Ethiopians
10. Do NOT talk like Gollum all through the movie. At the end, do NOT bite off someone's finger and fall down the stairs.
11. When Shelob appears, do NOT pinch the guy in front of you on the back of the neck.
12. Do NOT dress up as an old lady and reenact "The Battle of Helms Deep" Monty Python style.
13. When Denethor lights the fire, do NOT shout "Barbecue!"
14. Don’t ask people around you who they think is the next "Terminator" sent from the Middle Earth of the future to assassinate Frodo Baggins
15. Every time someone kills an Orc, do NOT yell: "That's what I'm Tolkien about!"
16. During a wide shot of a battle, abstain from inquiring "Where's Waldo?"
17. Do not start an Orc sing-a-long.
18. Do not come to the premiere dressed as Frankenfurter and wander around looking terribly confused.

BWAHAHAHA.. rofl.. that's good..

wow. those are good. especially the drinking game one. i think i'll try them out.
thanks
your friend
octapushunter

*claps* and if you see me watching the movie. DON'T bug me.

Hahaha! I think I'm gonna try No. 11 on one of me mates.

Hey, I'll laugh when Denethor dies, sorry all the fans of him out there *cough, cough*

This is great, but it's been posted elsewhere.

http://www.killermovies.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=20334&perpage=20&pagenumber=4

he he those were great when all three movies are out im goin for number 4 with my friends!!!

yeah i posted it in the spoofs thread, lol you got it from that aintitcoolnews site from the rotk review thing didnt you?

Those are great!

1,2,3,7,8,15 were funny as hell, ill try the Mr.Anderson one for the hell of it!

I'm a Matrix fan and I'll do #7. "Mr. Sauron welcome back. We missed you."

Oh, sorry it was already posted.
A friend just mailed it to me, and I thought it was hilarious

I'll go back and moderate the Matrix forum... Mr. Anderson

Too funny, rofl.

Haha... I did 1, 3, 4, 5, 6, 12, and 16 at TT!

Oh I think I just may now...juuuuuust may. Or I just might?

damn i'm sooo tempted to do a few!!
that drinkin game one the orcs one and the "you shall not pass"
one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
but i KNOW i'll be too engrossed in the movie lol.
but hey i can do the you shall not pass one!!!
damn its hilarious!!!!!!!!