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I was jus wunderin what you guys think about age diffrences in realtionships ...
cause i'm in a problem and i dunno who to talk to bout this, cause i don't wanna tell my friends i kno in person, so i thot why not ask ur guys' advice/thots

here's the problem:
i sorta really like this guy, but our age diffrence is 20 years apart. i'm only 18 and he's 38 and i kno this is a big gap, especially since the age diffrence is 2 years older then i am! But i really really like him, and i dunno if he has any clue to it! The first moment i saw him, i knew i wanted to be with him, and now i got to kno him (nothing between us happened, just a friendly kiss on the cheek) and we have SO much in common! he's been on my mind alot, and i'm gonna see him for the first time in a month 1/2 later tonite, and i don't kno whether to express my feelings towards him yet (known him for 3 months) or give him a hug or what! being that it's valintines..
what u guys think? should i go for it dispite the age gap? he treats me so well everytime i see him..

well as you get older ages don't matter but i wouldn't come right out and say your feelings if i were you i would just play it cool and not do anything rash

i agree with J. you're only 18. there's bound to be others that's your age.

very well put

thx guys! ... but should i give him a hug?

I dont think age should matter in relationships. Im always attracted to older guys myself (not guys who are 20 years older than me but you know ) but you should do what feels right. What Jugs said, dont do anything rash

its just a hug, do it.

thx luv!!!
i will.. if i'm brave nuff

Launa, hey girl!

I dont think there is anything wrong with the age differance HOWEVER, age differance may become a problem because of how you two look on life. What I mean is, a 38 year old will not have the same perspective on life as 18 year old.
However, if you two agree on stuff, i dont see problem with it wahtosever.

yea, some celebs are very odd couples (the particular age difference) and it doesn't affect their relationship. But, as lil bitchiness said, perspectives in life may be a bump in the road. Just know whats happening between you two, dont let him fall for another woman, and just keep it real. A hug? Sure! You gave him a kiss on the cheek right? A hug wouldn't hurt at all

age differences are sweet!

Yea you would agree him wouldn't you fall jedi ??

lol

No... Big age gaps in relationships don't turn out well... Especially if you actually got married and had kids--my great-aunt married a guy who was 20 or 30 years older than her, they had kids, the guy was never around, he died a long time ago, and at least one of the kids (my uncles, I guess that's what you'd call em) ended up being really, really screwed up. They always had fistfights when they were kids--like serious ones, not just joking around. I'm not trying to sound mean or anything, but I know a lot of people who are married to people a lot older than them, and are really not very happy. Just an opinion.

i think its a good thing

Well... Go ahead if you want, but age differences in relationships have always scared me because of the people I know in them who are unhappy

i think they're quite fine,if things cn work out...i mean,my mum's almost 10 yrs older than my dad and they;re doin well
then again...maybe the side effects of such a relationship is giving birth to unnatural children - that'd explain me!!

lol

Well 10 years isn't that big of a difference...

yup that's true
but maybe it's good enough to produce dysfunctional children like me

24?

im the weirdest in the family

I think it can be fine, but it can also turn bitter. For example, when im 25 years old, i would want to travel, buy stuff for myself, just live my life to the full, rather than being married and having children...not at that age anyway...later on, sure, i wouldnt mind having an older guy.

I guess its ok, and it really depends on people as well. I think you need to have stuff in common. Big age gaps, people tend to have less stuff and interests in common, and tis very thing becomes a problem later on.

My mom was married to my step dad who was 22 years older than she was, and i have to say they got along really well...however, when they had fights or disagreements, my stepdad used to treat my mom like a child, which she was in a sense compared to him, even though my mom is 40.

For me personaly,age differance is not a problem...to a certain age differance that is...i wouldnt go over 15 years in differance...maybe not that much even, but thats just me!

Mrs.MM is two years younger than me.

How outrageous am I? eh, eh?

*gasps* I'm shocked!

But we did get married early; I was 23 and she was 21.

Like-minded people make the best couples IMO, we've both wanted the whole marriage, house and kiddies thing since we met.

I think age difference is fine if it is reasonable. But I think if you are female and the man is old enough to be your father than I'm sort of against it.
I think the question is why are you looking or wanting such an older man, is there no one your age who you like?
Like is it his experience or what that is so attractive?

His wallet (usually)

well that's nice mech, although in the case of Anna Nicole Smith
that is too true...

Irma Kurtz Cosmopolitan's Agony Aunt prescribed a limit of ten years to a couple's age difference. But I have disagreed with her advice before.

Irma Kurtz??? Who is Irma Kurtz??? Who cares what she says??? Kill her!!!

There is no limit for couples age difference. And when people get older the age difference loses his handicaps. But there are a lot of psychological and maturity differences from each other that will have reflexes on their common life, especially when one of them is extremely young (Not younger than the other...For example the younger one is a teenager). But if the love is true there is no limit...but it will be necessary a lot of patience.

well...experience can be attractive...sorta

In the words of one of the greatest songwriters, Prince:-
Why is age more than a number when it comes to love?

But being old I would say that.

Well here is my point of view. I was 15 and had friends that were 22, 25, and 28 and inbetween. I would hang out with them some times and my parents hated it because they would say the age differnecs are just not close. Now a 20 year old hanging out with a 28 year old they said is a differnt sotry since they are on the same matturity level and what not. '

I found this stupid because i am very matture for my age and fit in with these guys they thought i shouldnt. But in dating there is deffitnly a bigger differnce. I mean a 15 year old going out with a 20 year old is just totally differnt. or a 15 year old going out with a 10 year old is also. but 18 and 38 now I mean you can still be in high school and he is thinking about retirment in the next 10 years or so.

I say try finding a younger guy I mean you want to spend a long happy life with someone. You dont want there kids father being 65 when they are like 15 do you. If you like him be friends but only that IMO. Im not telling you what you should do just trying to help you out. good luck

I have older friends, but on boyfriend level only like 5 or 6 years tops for me

My heart now bleeds, tears of sadness

Unless she is after his money I say GO FOR IT

You corran are an exception of course

Aww shucks, now I have gone a rather dark scarlet colour.

hug

In my opinion, Age really doesn't matter! So if you are attracted to someone and are in love than no matter what the age go for it! but, I mean looking later on down the road I mean your 60 he is 80 your 80 well he will probably be dead at age 100, but ya never know! Just go with ya gut girl!

Becca~

hmmm i dont think its all a big deal. i am actually writing a script where the 2 main chars r 17 and 27...and one of the basic plot lines is there age differance...hahaha the title is Age. and well this is corny but one of the tag lines and main lines is "Age is in the mind not the heart". i know cornyness like no other but i think its true.

I once started to write a book about a girl trying to follow in her world war 2 hero fathers footsteps. and i was like in 2nd grade and i got to page 10 and i was like oo **** this im going to watch cartoons. seriously

thx buds, for all your thots and advice!!
looks like i dont have to worry anymore..
he's got a girlfriend..
i'll be ok just being his friend..

Luana, maybe thats for the best

Older guys can be bigger arsehols than the ones your age..they are expirianced liers and will genaraly tell you all sorts of shit to get what they want.

That was a big differance between you two, and maybe its better, because you can now give a shot to someone closer to your age, someone who will not be so much older and plus have a girlfriend at the side...

Hey, I resemble that remark