'50 reason to Reject the Matrix'

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JediHDM
i know what you are thinking...and you're wrong. I was surfing the internet and came across a website titled, '50 reasons to Reject the Matrix'...oh, you should look at both pages together, to see my rebuttal of the 'reasons'...

http://www.pointlesswasteoftime.com/film/matrix50.html

This is such a load of [email protected] it is not even funny...
to begin with,

#1) i wasn't aware that there were sunglasses in the 7th century...and Neo didn't die in the first one to be 'like Jesus'...And Neo isn't dead.
#2) Ok, we learn in Animatrix that the machines are not bad...but apparently you didn't watch that. Apparently you also didn't catch that Sati is the child of two PROGRAMS...
#3) Yeah...she died...despite the fact that the second movie WASN'T only about her...
#4) Seraph is NOT a previous one. NO. YOU ARE WRONG.
#5) oh come on...i mean seriously. This isn't even up for thinking about. They cannot use EMPs because it would take out the city, they cannot make anything better than machine guns because they HAVE BEEN FREE FOR LESS THAN A HUNDRED YEARS...
#6) telekinesis is scientifically shown, but not everyone is able to do it.
#7)WHAT THE HELL!!!!!!!!! excuse me for being blunt, but THE DIED...how much more of a bastard can you be? seriously.
#8) he has not been able to feel pain...if you were blind, then had surgery and were able to see, would you not OPEN YOUR EYES?!?!
#9) i don't know about you, but i thought about a blowjob...didn't you? and infidelity, even among programs, has gotta be pretty low. Oh, and i'm pretty sure there WEREN'T deleted scenes on the DVD...
#10) Did they ever prove that the Matrix caused those boys to do that? i mean, did they?
#11) Last i checked, 300 million divided by 100 did not come out to a million...and there are hundreds of movies come out every year...what about them?
#12) Colonel Sanders is dead. And he did not play the Architect...that was Helmut Bakaitis...oh, and he's not a mascot...he's the founder.
#13) THERE'S NO AIR IN THE MATRIX...at least not real air...so Neo is fine.
#14) WHAT THE H3LL? DID YOU EVEN WATCH REVOLUTIONS?
#15) They aren't suppposed to 'blend in'...they are supposed to walk through walls...
#16) ...*sigh*...it is meant to show that, Neo's concentration was broked, therefore the spoon, or rather, his mind, was not bent anymore.
#17) It's not real...
#18) Again...it's not real...but didn't you see the thing turn back into its normal shape?
#19) fighting a war has casualties...
#20) Ok...yeah...i don't even know what to say to that...
#21) *sigh*...the point is that those 'disarmed' people don't become 'armed' agents while your back is turned...
#22) See #18
#23) what is your point? oh, that's right, you are just trying to fill space...
#24) It's a distraction...and did you not see that the FIRST FLOOR IS MADE OF LIMESTONE?!?!
#25) The point is, you can't beat an Agent. and the line was "he is beginning to believe", not, "he has become the ONE"
#26) See#23
#27) Morgan Freeman isn't even in the movie...
#28) See #23)
#29) Can you say, untraceable?
#30) Keanu Reeves was the perfect person for the movie.
#31) See #30 and #23
#32) Are we talking about palatable, or able to sustain one? Also, that which was in their 'container' is not how they eat, it is meant to provide them the nutrients the body gets through the skin, and to keep them a constant temperature
#33) OMG...its a movie...and its a movie about a reality world...i don't care how fast...shut up.
#34) I can't tell whether you are conservative or liberal...why protest a man and a woman?
#35) See #23
#36) See #23...Also, know that my IQ is well above average, and i can say the same about most of the people at KMC matrix forum.
#37) They don't receive nourishment from the Matrix...its a program. And they definitely don't share a blood stream...where did you get this info from? female slavery? what?!
#38) Ok, i have to agree that blotting out the sky was a stupid thing to do...but, then again, i have said this before. And i think that, if they run off solar energy, they would have batteries...like solar lights, for night. Who's not 'thinking'?
#39) Well, that is certainly not the message the Matrix gives...although you yourself seem to be for it...or at least spreading it around. The people in the Matrix were created with i/o ports for those needles in their brain...
#40) robot penis? i'm not even gonna answer this, as it is clearly explained in the first movie. oh, and see #23
#41) His name wasn't even mentioned...so see #23
#42) the line is "IT'S only good for..." sh!td!ck...get your mind outta the gutter.
#43) Surprise...WHAT MOVIE DID YOU WATCH?! really...i wanna know. Come on. Tell me. Besides, it was the fact that he KNEW better, not that he just wants the experience.
#44) The whole point is that they are trying to save the humans, not kill them...
#45) Again, the Matrix isn't real...it doesn't matter WHAT they wear.
#46) It is funny, how you consider yourself an 'intellectual elite' but you watch movies made by Hollywood and make obviously flawed statements...coincidence?
#47) See #31
#48) no...the point was that his mind was able to take all that information in with no problem.
#49) Wow...i'm impressed...since HTML is SOOOO hard to learn...take a stab at SQL, Java, C++, Fortran, COBOL, PASCAL, etc., etc.
#50) ...uh huh...well, apparently you DIDN'T 'master the complex code' since theres a problem with it...but, going based on the few phrases i was able to gather from that otherwise unintelligible point is, No, Trinity did not revive Neo by talking to him, but rather her expressing her love for him placed the final piece of the puzzle in place.

wow...gotta take a breather...whew...anyway, as i can tell from these rather, simplistic points, this 'Dr.' did not spend time or money to actually make this list worthwhile...and please excuse my yelling and my language...have at it.

JediHDM
As an addition...i went to the forum of this 'site' to offer up my rebuttal, but looking at the posts, and seeing how many [email protected] make up that 'forum' i decided not too. and yes, i said [email protected], and i meant it. just take a look at the 'Matrix' Thread and you will see what i mean...it is like a contest to see who can be MORE of a [email protected]

The Alpha
I am sure it is.

VenomVA
what a retard! Cypher came back in Reloaded and Rev? HA! what was he thinking? I hate Matrix bashers who don't know what the F*ck they are talking about.

Jedi> Great Reply, you make us real Matrix fans proud to know someone like you smile big grin Happy Dance

mors823
I would post a reply, but I fear that it would get me banned for two years. If it was just for a year, it would be worth it, but 2 years is too much. Here's a scaled down sample: U MF pice of sh*t. WTF do u f*cken
know about. Burn in Hell you SOB. Go suck you ****. See what I mean?

JediHDM
hahaha...as you can see, my reply contained language that is...atypical of my usual behaviour, so you can tell that this is very...worrying, to say the least.

mors823
at first, i thought 50 reason to rject the Matrix meant the actual Matrix, the virtual world. When I read it, I realized it was about the movies. This is the most worse thing someone can do. There's no email address to send your comments. Believe me, if there was, his email box would be full of hate mail in minutes, IF they even knew about this site.

mors823
My rebutal:

1. Neo is not Jesus. Some people compared him to Jesus, but it was never the W. Bros idea to make him Jesus. ...notice that Morpheus wears sunglasses without earpieces, just like Allah. WTF? Who cares? Morpheus wouldn't look good in earpieces

2. True, it seems like it's machine vs man, but Neo doesn't have the power to stop 250,000 machines. He needs another way to stop the war and guess what? He does. The war is over. I have no repsonse to para #3, besides that it TOTALLY WRONG!

3. The goal of M2 was to fulfil the propacy, not keeping Trinity alive.

4. What Jedi said. Seraph was never The One. What about the other Ones. Should they be punished? If they didn't sacrific Zion, the human race would have died out. That's worse that 250000 human dying.

5. EMP's take ALOT of energy to use. As Lock said, using one would wipe out the entire defense systems. The machine would attack in waves and kill everyone after the EMP went off.

6. It wasn't telekineise. Neo was able to connect to the Source and therefore shut off the attacking Sentinals. There's even an expalination in Rev. Are u that braindead?

7. This is sick. They died and were replaced by the same colored skin. Also, nearly all of Zion is of African desceant. The Rave party?

8. Wow! You're more sick than I thought. I don't know why he cut himself, but it was not for the reason u gave you perv.

9. No, it's not. Noe, Morph and Trin need to see the Merv. That's the point of the scene. And the Merv got his d*ck sucked, not his a**.

10. The film did not kill 13 people. Two wacked out boy did that. And of you're blaming th violence in this movioe on it, what about other movies.

11. There are plenty of movies that wasted money. Gigli?

12. The Col. was not casted. This was most likely a little bit of humor.

13. The Matrix isn't real. Neo can control it. Therefore, he can defy phsyical laws as said in M1.

14. What trick ending? Ban is not cipher, you noob.

15. The Twins job was to serve the Merv, not blend in.

16. The control over the spoon was lost and its code was resetted instantly.

17. Who cares? Thanks for pointing something NO ONE gives F*CK about.

18. It wasn't active, so it wouldn't burrow in.

19. The police are connect to the Matrix and the agents can flow into anyone connected to it. Therefore, the police and SWat men had to ahven been taken out.

20. Now, that's no fun, is it?

21. One word: Agents. sleeping cops can become agents. dead one's can't.

22. Uhh, the agents shot the chopper and it crashed. It wasn't flow in on purpose. It's a war people die as said b/f.

23. ????????

24. It was a diversion. Whether it worked, I don't know, but the building wasn't on fire. When does marble burn?

25. The climatic battle isn't until the last few minites in the hallway. This is when Neo is beginning to believe. And do u honestly expect to have a happy ending all the time. Neo wasn't strong enough and had to run. That's a much better ending of the battle.

26. Smith hates the Matrix. He doesn't want to be in it, but what's you're point, newby?

27. Morgan Freedmen wasn't in it. WTF were you there?

28. What do you expect. You started it.

29. Two words: Not traceable. Second, Neo need had to move. That's hard to do with a cord phone.

30. So? He rules. Korri will kick your a** if u insult him.

31. ???????????

32. Sure it is. The human body has all the nutrients required. Liquifing it will support a non-moving person long enough.

33. Neo slowed the bullets down, until they were a pack.

34. ??????????

35. No, it's not. I'm not fat, Jedi's not fat, a lot of ppl I know who like the movie aren't fat.

36. What's your IQ? There's a lot of hidden stuff that only smart people know about and we know about them. Do you?

37. ????????

38. A bad choice, but inevitable.

39. First off, you need a port in the back of your skull. It allows for the data to go directly to your brain. I'm no druggie and I'm sure everyone here is not a druggie.

40. WTF? WTF? WTF?

41. Not true.

42. It's talking about the food. Get your line stright u f*cken noob

43. Cypher was tired of the real world. He wanted stability, not steak.

44. Yes, they do. Besides, they're guard by a million machines.

45. It's not real.

46. ??????????

47. He rules. Stop using the same reason more than once.

48. Neo was dling the data. His brain was able to handle all the info.

49. Hacker are more aware of the Matrix. No Joe Shmoe will ever be aware of the Matrix unless he does something special (hacking, running ulta-fast)

50. Learnin your programing. Can't understand it.

So, this is my rebutal. Maybe not a good as Jedi's, but it add some more info. This guy needs to learn his stuff much better. I was able to tear his claims apart. Who else want's to try?

mors823
There's one for LotR. I'm thinking of showing it to the LotR forum. Again, it's pure sh*t.

http://www.pointlesswasteoftime.com/film/50reasons.html

whatshisface
quite funny. so a "PhD doctor" wrote all that bullsh!t to show contempt for a trilogy? this professor can't even distinguish a japanese man from a chinese man-- at least seraph was, in the movies. and if a guy stand in front of the screen in the theater while i was watching, i will not just throw my "stuff" at him, i will take the guy's "stuff" sitting next to me nd lob it at him... what kind of an @ss just stands up in front of the screen, disrupting everybody watching and expected not to be escorted out? some professor this guy is huh? and why the f*ck is he looking for morgan freeman in "The Matrix"?

JediHDM
what i find funny, is that this 'professor' said he didn't like the Matrix the first time, but then it goes on to say he watched it multiple times...and then he watched the sequels...what a moron.

sith_darth_jay
it has to be the most stupid "i hate the matrix" essay i've read so far

It's not even worth reading:

"Aaliyah and Gloria Foster were unceremonially dropped after shooting some scenes for Revolutions. What's wrong, guys? They didn't test well with the predominantly white Matrix audiences?

NEITHER ACTRESS COULD BE REACHED FOR COMMENT."

...that sums it all. the guy doesn't even know what he is talking about






















one lil' thing: even if they weren't dead, how could he possible "reach them"????????????

Ushgarak
This AGAIN? I posted this link a while ago.

I hate to say it... but you guys are really demonstrating low levels of sense here.

THIS IS NOT GENUINE!

MAN, this kind of thing lowers my opinion of people in general. The whole thing is a spoof, and one of the funniest damn things I ever read. It is taking the piss out of people that criticise the Matrix and it is MASTERFULLY written, and yet the forums are full of people who don;t realise this, and recevie firm rebuttals from the people who run the site (the Prof is not a real person, btw)

I thought it was just dumb people at that forum, but now I am VERY disappointed to see that none of you could see it for what it was either.

Very bad, this. My confidence is very shaken.

Now you have realised this, check out their LOTR one also, and their 'reasons why file sharing is bad', which has a hysterical start. They also have a series of websites taking the piss out of people who tried to spoilet the film.

This is a clever site made by fans- try not to let your emotions cloud your judgment in future.

Gee, how can you have POSSIBLY thought this was real, seeing how absurd it deliberatley got as time went by? I was annoyed I didn't get it by point 4, and anyone who seriously thought it was genuine by point 7... has issues.

It is tasteless, sure. But it is not dumb.

mors823
I thought something was wrong with this. I eman no one could trah the Matrix and LotR. As a neutral observor, it's funny as hell, but I can see how some ppl can hate it. I think it's more fun to counter his "claim". It shows that we understand the movie.

Ushgarak
The LOTR one is even better, especially the one they removed due to 'corrections', and the apology to LOTR fans is fantastic!

Ushgarak
Ah, gee, look, the LOTR people thought it was serious as well... sigh... I posted the damn thing there months ago as well.

mors823
Must of missed it. I wonder if anyone honestly agrees with this, cuz i would like to smack them silly. I did begin to realize that thsi guy was messed up; that it couldn't be true and it isn't.

Ushgarak
Indeed, it is just an very extreme parody. Actually, whilst the LOTR one is funnier, this one is cleverer. The one about white test audiences is all related to the people who thought Tank was fired for race reasons.

These points are all based upon criticisms that were actually made, btw, by real people. It is a chronic piss take of the mindset of small-minded critics.

Alias_Neo
why the hell do u even post in hereno expression

<<Solo>>
Agreed....I go there and I'm like seriously laughing out loud...But it was pretty funny though...

mailedbypostman
I HAVE TO GO THERE AND POST HATE MAIL AT THIS...IDIOT!
1) It seems he didn't pay attention.
2) His reasons are completely idiotic, half of it is "obtained" by not paying attention, half has NOTHING TO DO WITH THE MOVIE!
P.S. Somone has GOT to go there and fight for Zion! Set things straight and all.

mors823
It's just a joke. stick out tongue Besides, many ppl have already done that. Make your own reply here.

mailedbypostman
*Takes deeeep breath. deeeep breath. deeep breath* There all better now. sad

Ushgarak
I hope people are actually bothering to READ this thread.

xeous
Ush, I think the reason that people took it seriously is because sarcasm isn't easily expressed...Especially with all of the true idiots(that would write something like that for real) there are out there...

I must say though, even though it was a joke...The comment about Foster and Aaliyah was completely tasteless. If you're going to be funny, be original about it and don't try to pick on people who are deceased and obviously can't fight back.

Shape Shifter
I'm dreaming of a white... cast?

Two actors were abruptly cut from the third film's cast before production ended, both female minorities. Coincidence?

Aaliyah and Gloria Foster were unceremonially dropped after shooting some scenes for Revolutions. What's wrong, guys? They didn't test well with the predominantly white Matrix audiences?

Neither actress could be reached for comment.


War crimes

Seraph is revealed to be a former one, as most of us guessed by his stand-off fight with Neo. What is not mentioned is that this man is also responsible for the deaths of hundreds of thousands of Zionites in some previous incarnation of The Matrix since he obviously chose the other door in The Architect's TV shop.

Why was he not punished for causing this slaughter? And, being Japanese, we must ask if he pleasured himself at the thought of all that death?


The idiot is suggesting that the makers of the matrix films are racist, then he goes on to diss Seraph and suggest that because Seraph was Japanese he enjoyed killing the Zionites? Now i'm sure there's somehing wrong with this picture...and btw Seraph isn't Japanese u noob he's chinese. And hell u moron if u stood up in the middle of a movie in the cinema and started whining about it I'd throw something heavy at you...that had a sharp edge.

JediHDM
Ush...i apologize...but i have heard and listened to so many people give me similar reasons why the Matrix movies were horrible that i took it for face value...Some of it is funny, but as xeous has said, the cut about Aaliyah and Gloria Foster was too tasteless to make this funny. And i have heard people go on about the 'race factor' in the Matrix movies. Plus there are the people who drop in here and ask questions like "Whats the name of the last human city?" which leads me to believe, again, that this was for real...*sigh*...alright. I'm better now...
*turns to Matrix Forum and Omega* Forgive me of this...although, since it has been brought up before (and i seem to vaguely remember it now) could we amend it to the KMC Matrix questions thread? So it isn't mistakenly brought up again?

xeous
"And i have heard people go on about the 'race factor'"

I don't see how this could even be a valid argument.

First off, the guy who really does make the war end-Morpheus-is African American. Easily in the most important characters in the film.

Second. The darn ORICLE is African American.

Third. Did anyone notice the party at Zion? Most of those people were African American.

Fourth. Link, Tank, Dozer. No one noticed that the operators of the Neb were all African American?

I think that the African American population has it's bases covered in the film.

JediHDM
That is EXACTLY what is brought up...the white people live in a 'fantasy world', while the black peoples in the dump...wassup wit dat?

xeous
It's disrespect...From way back in 'da 90's when they had to live in da hood.

Ushgarak
Shapeshifter, please read the thread.

And I agree it is tasteless but I don't think that detracts from the humour value.

mors823
I believe this one to bemore real than the LotrR since there are ppl who hate the Matrix. If u read both, then it becomes more apparent that it's fake. I do like sarcasim, but only when I know it is, otherwise, I might take it to seriously, like I did here.

Shape Shifter
umm okay...and???am i missing something?

Trinity_Matrix
Yikes...I personally found that and the LOTR one to be highly amusing, although some of the jokes were in bad taste, it was still really funny. But you have to keep in mind that it's pretty hard to convey sarcasm through text printed on a screen.

tpaquin

mailedbypostman
Why did you ressurrect this?

Korri
oh god almighty not again messed

mailedbypostman
It wasn't SO bad. Well, not really.

Korri
you wish no expression

shaber
The Matrix seemed a better place than Zion in the original.

mailedbypostman
But is it?

Arachnoidfreak
This, and the LOTR ones are the shittiest spoofs I've ever read. Ever. www.landoverbaptist.org is an example of a good spoof. These were not. When you spoof something, you take the original and exaggerate it. The exaggeration is not supposed to be able to be proven wrong though, just that the perception of the exaggeration is so absurd that you have to believe that it's 1. a spoof, or 2. that these people are lunatics.

I thought neither. Bad spoof.

mc pee pants
new jersey seemed like a better place than zion after the first movie.

mailedbypostman
Huh?

mc pee pants
what now? dontknow

Ushgarak
Nope, that just shows you haven't read i properly. Do so.

It's spoofing the CRITICS.

Geez.

Do your research before you post comments. Thier boards are also full of people who tried to change tack and try and dismiss it intellectually as well, and they all look just as silly.

tpaquin
Landoverbaptist.org is too blatant a spoof to be particularly amuzing. Satire is supposed to be some...subtle...

Arachnoidfreak
That's funny, you think I didn't know it was meant to spoof the critics.

I read their boards also, before my post. I'm not trying to "change track"(uhh, what? that would imply that I thought it wasn't a spoof in the first place). It was just a shitty spoof. Maybe they have better ones, but I'm saying that these two, the Matrix and LOTR critic spoofs, suck.

Silver Stardust
Why are all these old threads being bumped? I know this forum is dead, but really...*bangs head off keyboard with frustration*

IT IS A JOKE.

End of story.

JediHDM
omg...what did i do to deserve this inane bumping of stupid threads, some of which i, in bouts of lunacy, created?! why, oh why?

Wolfie
After reading this, I feel like I need to lie down. This is idiotic beyond reason. My four year-old niece could come up with a better critique than this should she watch each film once.

mailedbypostman
It's OKAY PEOPLE! Let it go... Just let it go...

xeous
Worst bump ever.

mailedbypostman
Don't bump it!

Korri
cry its not our fault

JediHDM
i'm not blaming it on you, dear...i'm blaming it on the people who shall remain nameless that keep bumpinb useless threads

Korri
well these people that shall remain nameless have had a few words from me so i dont think it will be happening again wink

Arachnoidfreak
~!*--!SHAMELESS BUMP!--*!~

Spoof
good lord what is it wtih all these Matrix haters? I mean seriously some people in this chat seem to make it their lives to down the matrix...I think their the ones who are obsessed. It's just a movie people what the hell are we all fighting about. We're allowed to have our own opinions true..but in the matrix chat don't join it if you don't like it..save yourself the goddamn trouble!

Ushgarak
Well, this was still hilarious. It was a spot-on attack on some of the dumbass criticisms people were levelling at Matrix.

And I guess Sandman was just unable to appreciate that. Shame.

Lana
Haha, I remember this thread.

I still crack up at the 'critique' as well.

Lord Melkor
So most people on KMC did not understand it? Pretty pathetic, it reminds me that Ush`s games are only reason I hang here.

Nosilly
The need to resurrect this old thread is strong, and so be it. He called it temporary lunacy, but it was more related to stupidity.

It is one of those fine examples of what not to do when you're posting opinions on the internet.

Enjoy, be ashamed for the original poster (I know I am, with my confidence shaken as someone else said), and heed the warning: forever pay close attention, and ever read thoroughly before ever writing any critic on your own. Otherwise it could happen to you.

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