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Well... i've been thinking about starting this thread for a long time

basicly here i'm gonna discuss about my illness. i suffer from alot of mental diseases. schizofrenia, paranoia, depression, neurosis...i hear things all the time, i see shit that arent there, i meet and talk to people who doesnt exist...i had episodes all the time

yesterday morning when i woke up i saw a girl in my bedroom and i started a conversation with her, beautiful girl. 20 minutes later i realize she wasnt there. i was really pissed, i tried to ignore her but my mind wount let me. then she pull her eyes out, in front of me.
i freak out, i couldnt breathe i couldnt call my family for my pills. so i cut my wrist, i almost die yesterday.

this kind of things happen to me all the time.



so you can give your opinions...please this is serious, so, jokes wont be received well. if you have similar experiences can help too

My dad is just like that. I'm okay with it, but sometimes he doesn't even know I'm here. Everything's okay, BE. Don't cut yourself.

You ever thought about getting yourelf checked in? Seriously. I've seen weird shit too and Use to cut myself. But nothing that serious. If what your saying is true you NEED to get checked into a hospital

Naz is right.......although what your going through isn't pleasant, cutting yourself just makes it worse.

i've been locked in mental institutions SO many times before




besides the cuts , i have MANY, MANY, MANY , MANY scars that i made to myself. once i burnt my face , i didnt have hair for a couple of months.


all this problems started with my mom

the feeling of pain isnt new to me

Yeah, I know you think death will make it all go away. It won't. I've tried. Personally, I think it would be soo much easier to have a mental problem. Just sometimes. I would have fun talking to people that aren't there. They're so much nicer than the real world.

But that isn't the point.

NAZ i dont think death is the solution, i dont...i have a daugther, wich i LOVE HER SOOOOO MUCH, but this illness is making it difficult for me to take care of her, icant even take care of myself. they even threated me to take her away from me.


i used to enjoy talking with this imaginary people , but not anymore... now i see mutilated people, mutilated babies, burnt people. f*cked!!!!!!!!

i cant take it anymore, but i struggle, or at least i try

it's my life and i try to cope with it

Do you turn to God?

Just a question...

You see, its your life and the life of your daughter that are keeping you going through this.....everytime you you hurt yourself or think that it isn't gonna get better, just think of them.

i know what you're saying...but sometimes it's really hard to resist myself from doing this things to me

Naz , i dont believe in god

It's cruel. I know, somehow the pain is deceiving.

it's not like i'm bored at home and i say "heyy, let me cut myself"

i have this episodes where i see people and other crazy sh*t!!!! , then i cant breathe and when i lose control, well...that's where things happen

Okay. A lot of people don't believe in Him/Her because of this. But He/She is there anytime.

Just like me, if you catch me at the right moments. In a couple of years, I'm sure I'll be coming to you with many questions, BlindEnemy. My dad's illness may be genetic.

too bad to hear that naz

i dont want anybody to carry this burden...i'm 20 but i've suffer this since i can remember ( maybe 4 , 6 or 8)


you can ask me whatever you want... you too devalion

Well, do you hate it when the world moves? Like, you travel down the street or somewhere, and have to stop because nothing feels secure?

I do, and I don't know why.

never had that feeling... but you'll never know when bad things will happen to you...

I've a mild case of shizophrenia, but nothing that serious. not to joke around, but you need help

been paranoid all my life. have strong phobias and obsessions.. dun remember how it's called

I have to log out now. But, BE, keep talking to someone. It helps me a lot.

i know i need help dude!!... i've recieve help... i have to take like 11 or 13 different kinds of pills each day, they are so many that i've lost track of what is each one. i recieve therapy once a week. i've been locked and left isolated in metan clinics SO many times. i was locked in one like two or three weeks ago.

see ya naz and thank you

I know this is gonna sound weird, you ever try meditating?

never...



sometime it's hard to still my mind, you know what i mean???

i'm sorry BE. i think everyone's right. you need some help.

I do. Like I said, I've been there before, never that serious, but still there. Wish I knew what to say, cuz it seems like your mind is fond of working against you

my mind likes to play tricks on me, all the time







i know my life suck, but i dont complain all the time, i just live my life one step at the time. my daughter is of alot of help.

i've had all this problems before i even i was born

thank you all who post here , for their words and time

i dont beleive u.

???why not???

ok well if you checked yourself in before and that didnt work i think you should try someting different like spearhead said maybe you should try meditating...or...i know this may sound cruel and i'm being totally serious but did you ever try shock therapy?

my mom want the shock therapy buy the rest of the family wont let her (lucky)

Shock therapy!!??!! NEVER!!!! Trust me on this one... as a recovering schizophrenic (we're never cured, always recovering...) I can tell you that ect is the last resort of the psychiatrist who is at his wits end.... it doesn't wok, and can make things worse... its usually suggested by the same people who say "Have you thought about a lobotomy..." just learn to say no to the voices... every morning and evening, tell yourself that you are strong, even if you don't believe it... it will get better...

BE, ever see A Beautiful Mind? Not only is it a good math movie, but John Nash suffers from Schizofrenia. It's a pretty cool movie. His wasn't as bad, but he did believe that there were hidden messages in magizens about a nuclear bomb. Do get help, not only for yourself, but for all those you love.

Actually, Spear has a point. I meditate occasionally, it really helps when I'm feeling stressed out and crap. I don't know that it would help with a serious problem, but it's worth a try. You don't have to try to quiet your mind, just sit down in a nice quiet place, and "listen" to your mind. Don't try to change what's there, just be aware of it. Ask yourself, how are you feeling, what's going on in your mind, what does your body itself feel like, etc etc. Like I said, I'm not sure how far it would go to help somebody like you, but it's worth a try.

And yeah, if you haven't seen A Beautiful Mind... The guy tried all the medication that was out there, eventually he just quit because he figured the problems with the medication outweighed the benefits of taking it. Then he just... ignored the things he kept seeing. Seems pretty hard to do though...

BE I am 13 fixin to be 14 and I am kinda like you I see people when I am alone in the house. I even talk to them. I sometimes hear voices when no one is around. It is really creepy. My mom got this email that asks a question. The only people who got the answer right were people in a mental hospital. My mom got the answer wrong but I got it right. The qeustion has a story with it and goes a little something like this: A woman went to her mother's funeral when she sees the man of her dreams. After the funeral she talks to that man. When she got home she realized that she forgot to get his phone #. So she got scared that she won't see him again. The next week or so the woman kills her sister.

Question: Why did the woman kill her sister?

Sorry to hear that dude. My second cousin has schizophrenia quite badly - it has NOT been a pleasant life for him! At the age of sixty he is still totally incapacitated. Better let your parents or guardians know that you are having a troublesome time at the moment.

Oops, sorry man I hadn't checked your age in your profile Didn't mean to sound condescending or anything.

Well... What's the answer? (PM it to me if you like..)

I learned about Scizofrenia in Psychology class....wow...I'm sorry I never really knew how bad this mental disorder could be. if you ever wanna talk I will be glad to listen ..I will try my best to help you

thank you all for the great words




my family had learned how to cope with my illness. they've been of alot of help. but lately i'm feeling more sick than ever, maybe because they threated with taking my daughter away from me. she's the only thing that keep me sane, i really love her, she's so small and fragile, and doesnt know what's happening to me


i'm only 20, i'm a real young guy...i've suffer from this as long as i can remember.

it's not the EASY to just ignore the voices in my head. it's really hard to turn my back on the visions. i sometimes i cut myself so i can focus my mind on the pain and not on the visions . so far this is the most extreme measure i've try , but is the best that works




i've seen a beautiful mind, i liked the movie but it didnt help me

See ya later dude

You've always have friends here to rely on. I think it might help if you keep on talking about it. I hope nothing bad happens to you.

thnx

today was a crappy day, shit!!!!!!!!!!

i went to my psychiatrist...what an morron i f*cking hate him...
in today's session he started by saying i was suicidal, wich is untrue because i'm NOT. then he toke from me some of the pills he give, i was pleased, but then he gave me even more pills, different pills, F*CK!!!!




how many pills a man can swallow before he dies???

were the pills red or blue?

I wouldn't say you're suicidal. I say find another shrink. I really dont' know what to say. I never been in your situation or know anyone with Schizofrenia, or any mental disorder. I wish I could be of more help.

Q: Why did the woman kill her sister?

A: So she could see that man again.

What are all these pills and what are they supposed to do...?

This might sound crazy but... My uncle went to a counselor for a while, he had a pretty screwed up life with his family and shit... The dude kept telling him to do something assertive. So then he finally did something assertive: he quit going to him.

Dude, your shrink's job isn't to tell you all the things you're doing wrong and tell you things about you that he has no way of knowing are true... He's supposed to be nice and talk things over with you, rather than telling you what to do. If it were up to me, screw the counselor. But judging by your thoughts on him, you don't have a choice...?

hey, i got some pretty serious shit look, my uncle has the exact same illness than u, once we were in the countryside (all fo my family) and my uncle forgot his pills in the city, and we decided that we would get them in the morning. passed midnight (around 3:00 am) we hear my uncle screamming and he was screaming "MOM! KILL ME U SAID U WANTED TO THEN DO IT HERE I HAVE A KNIFE JUST DO IT!" (he had a knife in his hand) after he calmed down we explained him that my grandma did not told him anything about that she wanted to kill him, and he started crying, 2 months later his girlfriend killed herself ad he was soo sad that he tried the same thing, we got an ambulance, and he suvirved, now his locked up... so i would say DO NOT TRY THE SCOKING CRAP!! but take care of yourself even though u hate your physichiatrist just go...

I wish I'd seen this thread before.

When I was about 11 years old my dad took me to a counsellor, and from there I was diagnosed with Paranoid Schizophrenia. At the time, I believed it to be total bullshit, and had I spoken up my problems would have been cleared up much more quickly. I'm now almost 20, and I've only found out in the last couple of years that my problem is not a schizophrenic one at all, but that I have what is called Asperger's Syndrome. This problem is a weaker form of Autism. Basically, the person who has it is not quite connected to reality, sees things differently. Often, they can come across as arrogant or rude, when they truly do not see the problems with what they say or do. It's really hard socially, as people treat you like you treat them. But they've got no reason, just that they don't understand.

When I was younger I felt ashamed, as I had been told I was schizophrenic, and I used to self harm quite badly. I hated the fact that I was different. I felt like an outcast, and also as I was quite intelligent I hated myself more for not being able to understand and accept. It's like a vicious circle. I think if I'd been diagnosed properly I might have learned to explain my problem and wouldn't have been through so much pain mentally.

Although I don't generally see things physically, my mind does seem to have a life of it's own. But I think that's normal, I think that when you hear things, you're simply connected more closely with your conscience.

I really feel for all of you who have been through so much, but I've come out stronger, and I hope you all get through your problems the way I have

my only problem of this is kind is that i'm never sure if sth happend for real or i just made it up..
it can be confusing sometimes. coz i'm asking about things which never happened

Sometimes I cut myself. Onetime theis year I cut myself so badly that I thought I would have a tattoo on my arm for the rest of my life. Even though I really want a tattoo I don't want it to be a cut that I did. I still have the scar but it is not as bad as it was.

hug

It's no problem, I'll talk if you need to

i'm always open for anyone who wants to talk about this things with me.
i've seen you around for a time syren and this is the first time i chat with you and it's been a pleasure

Sorry, but discussing this on a message board filled with people who don't know anything about that illness probably isn't the best idea.

If you are really in need of help, go to a specialist.


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