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Okay, heres the deal, Ill start really simple, i start writing it, then u continue on from there and then the next person carrys on from urs and so on, ok, here we go....

It was a....

dark and stormy night, Jim was walking home from the stripclub when all of a sudden...

The fat stripper that Jim didn't tip ran out of the door

running twords Jim,weilding a switchblade raised at striking posistion, screaming violently "wheres my tip mo fo?"

"I dont have it now bug off"Then the striper sliced jims head off.Making for a nice opening scene

credits.....then

title-
THE TIPPER THAT DIDNT TIP

as the movie begins, we see our hero Dick enter the Realm of Vagina. Later our hero...

forgot his partner Mr. trojan, and realizes that he is in to deep to turn back now. Though unsafe, dick ventures ever deeper into the void of the vagina not knowing exactly what to expect

suddenly out of no where he sees a dead body of a woman sprawled across a pipe,her insides had been cut out and were layed in a formation making a message,it said,"GO AWAY!"

Dick started to throw up, and he heard a scream, then he ventured futher into the realm of vagina,

violence is everywhere to Dick's eyes...he enteres another part of the Realm of Vagina...the Fallupian Tubes...in here, he discovers dead corpses walking...

he shoots them down one by one, with his "spidy web"

but more still come,so he just jumps over them all to see where they're all coming from.there he saw a pipe where one by one the were being squished out

the zombies were walking slowly and saying in a british accent "hello"...over and over...

what ever happend to zombies and inbred phycos?

he thought to hiumself,so he just waloked by and they didn't bother him till a fat stripper said,"KILL HIM!"suddenly they all turned with a evil look in thier eyes,they closed in on him chanting in a cheap british voice,"KILL HIM!KILL HIM!"

when they got close they pulled down there pants and started to dance

this story is starting to distrube me

me too but it's fun!
he did big circles and the zombies watched happily.he did it so hard that his boxers came down.all the zoombies heads exploded.
(too x-rated?)

he pulled his pants up and ran up a tree...the zombies came closer and he pissed on all of them....

they melted, dick ran further more, eventually he randomly coughed up a bunch of little tadpoles that seemed to no there way around, they all ran for this round red thing and tried to penetrate but...

he got away before they did,but the stripper was coming for him now with a switch blade,the same one he used to kill the tipper last night.

Dick knew Karate, he was prepared to fight.

but before he could react,a headless zombie came from behind and held him as the stripper sliced his head off.then he jolted awake.
"It was just another nightmare."he told himself.
'Yeah the same nightmare i've had since the last murder case i did last month.'
he just didn't feel that the guy they busted was really the one.as if he was just a decoy for the real killer.

then god appeared and told him that the killer was one of his multiple personalities, and that that righteous side of him was leaving himself clues so that he may find the truth. God decided to intervene and judge him. God said he was a really really mean guy and killing people was pretty bad thing so he sentenced him to the evil rotting vagina plagued with zombies that he has been dreaming about to live forever

so dick said to god,
"screw you!"
and he shot him in the head.god layed there on his desk dead.he dragged him to the back lot to where there was some contruction going on and threw his body down the hole where fresh cement was being pored into.

Then God got made and send dick to hell

Dick is now in Hell, and God is watching from the sky. Dick now walks in hell...

dick meets saten and talks to him the devil sends him back to earth as an agent of hell

Spawn gets jealous and destroys dick with single blast of Hell. dick now deosnt exist at all, only his conscous exists which finds it's way in possessing a small child

meanwhile in hell, Hitler, Stalin, Lenin, Mussolini and Mao are starting a new regime of demons to attack earth and destroy all of excisitence.

"okay,so far we have that,sadam fellow,and a few element demons,wind fire and water,we just need earth and then we'll be done with elements..."
"hi,names dick,i want to sign up."
"whats your powers?"
"i was a hell agent till spawn blew me out of existence,and now i can take over childrens and teenagers bodies."
"okay,we'll get back to you."
"i can also get osama bin laden here if i get the job."
"your in!"the guys said together.
"not so fast satan!"god said.
"oh shit!make a run for it!"the other demons yelled.
"what now?"
"don't use this man!he might of killed me but i will not let you use him!"
"dude,you killed god?"
"yeah"
"listen,keep in contact with us with this,while your up there."hitler whispered to him.

Shrouded in a night of chain smoking insomnia, john smith turns his attention through the haze of smoke to the shotgun that is leaned next to him on his bed. not wanting to take the final commintement into death, john goes over the past events that led him to this point. It started with the foriegn voices in his head a week ago. Though they started subtle, leading him to believe it was just adolesence, he soon would accept the truth. Somthing had entered his head and was telling him to do the bad things. the bad things he diddnt want to do. However, he could not help listening to the voices, they held some kind of curious temptation. The more he listend, the more he realized he was slowly losing controll of his own thoughts. No one believed him, his mother heard him, but was comatosed in a daze of white poison running through her veins.Friends laughed, and teachers just analyzed him.

He had to do somthing before it was to late. Sooner than later the voices would accomplish it's goal. John diddnt know what this was, but knew it was somthing that could nver happen. It was an early morning that john decided to endulge in the voices commands. It happend so fast before he knew it the old lady that had been walking her dog just a momment ago was now sprawled out lifeless on the ground with her throat slit, and john was left stained in blood, clutching the kitchen knife that did the deed. after fleeing the scene, john knew what must come next, he knew that if these voices had anymore time they would surely find more ways to tempt johns hand into evil.

that was it, these were the final thoughts that ran through john smiths mind as he picked up the shotgun, and poured the nails into the barrel, He wanted no one to recognize him, not after what he had did earlier this morning. John held the barrel a few inches away from his face, and witnessed the snap of the fire through his teary eyes as the gun unloaded and fullfiled it's intended purpose. no one believed John, no will ever believe john, they will however, believe they could have done more when they hear how he was found under his blood spattered wall, and they will believe they should have listend when they go to his funeral and look down at his closed casket.

the voice of the demon named dick had failed on his immediate goal of possesing a young soul, but now the doors are open. despair is an emotion open to temptation, temptation for his entrance back into the world.

After the funeral, Jenny, the girl who secretly like john. sat on the steps wishing that she would give anything to be able to go back in time. At her lowest and darkest, somthing was preying on her, somthing deep in her mind.

then two hundred rabid zombies ran towards the funeral. Dick flys by destorying all of them esially

dick's spirit flew into the innocent mind of a child named cindy and took complete control he made her go into her father's study and take out his shot gun,loaded it and she walked up into her parents room.
"cindy what is it?"
"time to die!"
she shot them and left shooting anything that moved.'now to look for osama!'she thoughtosamarifle

dick leaves the little girls body and take a five year old boy by the name of Joseph. Jeseph kill his paraents and all of his family

he keeps doing the same thing cause kids bodies don't last long.finally he found a good healthy tennager.John Smith.

omg this is screwed up

i know but it's funny.
hahahahahaha i laugh kenshin2

yeah, well im lost so u continue with the story maybe ill catch on l8er

Dick dies everyone dies, earth explodes, and all of excistence ENDS!!

*curtains fall*

*audience stands*

*applause*

-Fin

that;s gay dude real gay!more like,
dick makes john kill every one in the world and god caomes,the ultimate battle.dick wins but everything is destroyed within a 500 kilometer radius.
great going dick head!now we have to start again!-god says
hey!god cussed!to hell with you!!!-says satan

No...i believe that was gay

Ragesremorse is correct^

fedfan is just a pathetic athiest.

omg the whole story was f*cked up..the best part was rages remorse about john smith..he/she can actually write and i give credit to them..the rest was just plain retarded...it was good at the beginning but then it just became stupid

He was an old man. An old man that sits on the corner of Main and 1st everyday begging people to give him money. He has long white hair and a full grown white beard. he has no clothing other than a dirty old piece of cloth that covers his upper body and raggey torn what used to white underpants that covers his privates. he carries a can and begs people that walk down the street to give him money. he is very skinny and looks very unhealthy. one afternoon a few guys decided to rob a bank across the street from where the old man sits...the robbed it and ran out quickly the police showed up and started to chase the men..one robber ran next to the old man and was tackled down by one of the cops...the robber drop his gun and some of the money..the old man quickly ran over and grabbed some of the money..he saw the gun..he thought about picking it up..he quickly grabbed it without the cops seeing and ran away as fast as he could..he fianlly had some mon ey..enough money to buy him somethin to eat...he walked into a mcdonalds and walked to the counter to buy somethin...but because he was pantless and shoeless the manager tried to make him leave the store...the old man went crazy and pulled out the gun..."give some f*cking food or i'll kill you all" the people inside eating and the mcdonalds workers became very scared as the old man starting pointing his gun all over the place...he screamed again to give him some food...the crew hesitantly brought the old man some food...he plowed into the fries and burger..it was the best taste he had in many many years...someone in the store had called the police and they were all pulling up..he screamed," who the f*ck called the police" "i'll f*cking kill u all" "tell them to go away" the old man pulled the trigger....

That story was really ****ed.I didn't even read all of it.

And blew a little boy's head completely off. Then the old man tried to shoot the cops but he used his only shot. They arrested him and took him to state prison where he was raped regulary. A week later, a group of people in black silky cloaks broke in and killed all the cops. Then they kidnapped the old man and took him to their mansion to sacrifice him to the Chupacabra God. After all The chants, the mexican gargoyle-type Chupacabra flew in and brutally massacred the cult. Then he went to the old man and licked him. Now the old man had a pet. The old man could fly anywhere he wanted now(Something like Neverending Story)....