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Where do you guys find beauty in a person and do you need to see beauty in the face and form before you will look for it elsewhere ?

From the movie Liar Liar:

Max Reede : My teacher tells me beauty is on the inside.
Fletcher : That's just something ugly people say.



(note: this quote does not respresent the ideas of me)

Unfortunately, the majority of the population agree with Yerssots statement.

have to say, if ur talking about a relationship....physical attraction is obviously important, u cant have a succesful relationship without some physical attraction there, imo neway.... but its not as important as mental attraction, in the later stages neway

So true Df, in the long run anyway.......I have dated and married some fine looking men but some of them were dumber than a box of rocks and that proved to be unworth the original investment.

i think that to start the intitial relationship, a guy has to find some amount of physical beauty, but once he gets to know her and her personality, he might or might not change his mind about their relationship

it's not my statement, it's a quote from a movie

We always and everywhere try to be beautiful, and in the process a mirror becomes more personal to us than we are to ourselves. The process of becoming beautiful and looking good is so rapid that what we become is just an outward us.
An expression on our face is actually the reflection of what we are from within. We can camouflage the exterior, but what can we do to the interior. Our goodness or badness, generosity or animosity or love or hatred, all show somewhere here or somewhere there on our bodies. If we are good from within, our face reflects a mesmerizing state of goodness; if we are not, we clearly show it through our expressions.
There are the ones who carry an inner, positive influence as a beautiful mark on their faces.
If someone has beauty in his/her soul, he/she looks like a really beautiful person to me. The surface beauty looked at with our eyes doesn't last forever.

To be honest, when I first met Fire, I didn' t find him attractive at all
But each day, I got to know him more and more... until that one day when he walked through my door again and all of a sudden, it struck me how attractive he had become to me. Today, he' s one of the most beautiful persons I' ve ever met.

The mirror reflects our lives back to us,
and shows us what we look like to others,
but it doesn' t show what we look like to ourselves,
and it doesn' t show what' s inside.
It only shows things that shouldn't matter to anyone...

Yeah Yerssot...but we must accept that if you make the quote you agree with it eh ?

.................................................

I asked the original question as I know for a fact that a few people...MEN..in particular, that I have known in the past have been deadly with the ladies simply because they had a good line of chat and not necessarily a lot of good looks.

SO... with THAT in mind do we think that the ladies are attracted to the personality even before they see the handsome face and the six-pack and after they have had the first sexual encounter the patter AND the sexual prowess overrides the looks of the guy ?

I think that this set of rules, ( if we can agree on them ), do not work the other way round as when the guys are on the make and they see a "fit" young female it is certainly the looks that matter first and foremost. ( Intellectuality comes way down on the list of requirements ).

In fact, even with a few drinks under the belt it is the illusion of the good looks of the female that decides if they want to take them home for tiffin !

C'mon girls...blow me out of the water if you want to as I have been known to be wrong before !

my first post:

I immediatly posted there that those are not my ideas cry

Honestly I think I'm a little shallow

I mean I don't turn up my nose at anything, but I find myself being pulled toward the attractive guys more than the not so attractive ones. Of course I wouldn't be rude and ignore someone based on appearance

Initially I think surface beauty is important nowadays more so than ever. Everyone is consious of their appearance, whether it be perfect skin, the right weight, shiny hair whatever I mean I saw a little 8 year old girl turning down an ice cream from her mother because she was worried about her weight

I find sometimes though that the not so attractive guys are the best ones for me Some people have brilliant personalities, that not everyone gets to know because they judge a book by it's cover.

This lady does. Taking into account that Fire and I coincidentally first met over the Internet and only after some weeks of on-line conversation also met irl.

as a certain member would say (not telling who, but it's not me):

you are always attracted to the physical appearance... let it be a lot or a little, cause you will never start a convo (or continue one) if you think the other ones is butt-ugly




(and I'm stressing it's not me, cause of what pap said about my first post)

Isn't that corran or BF

Lost something in the translation I think !

But hey...don't let it put you off as I wouldn't have a clue how to say that in Swedish....is it ?

I... hoped my post turned out to be in english

Yeah...and damned good English it is too !

............................................................

To try to widen this "attraction" thing a bit more:

Would the people here consider that the attraction might be all about something called Charisma...( or the lack of it when there is no attraction ), as, a person with charisma can light up a room with this quality and can have people, ( men AND women ), attracted to them like moths to a flame.

When a person has charisma he or she does not need to be physically attractive to get the girl, ( guy ).

This kind of attraction is often hard to quantify or measure but there is no doubt that it works, and can work right across a room over a noisy crowd.

Anybody else witnessed this phenomenon ?

ST, you are not shallow. you're right. today surface beauty IS very importnant. it's sad, but it's true.

Charisma is something that people believe in but is difficult to define. Charismatic people might be referred to as charming, alluring, appealing fascinating, glamorous and magnetic, exuding a certain joie de vivre. When we're talking about charisma, we're talking about a trait rather than a quality imo. It can be developed and nurtured.

I still think ppl are born with Charisma but Charisma has nothing to do with being beautiful.

Sad but true.

True beauty is on the inside, but how many of us actually get to see that in a person at first? How many times have we turned our heads cuz of the outward appearance, how many times have we missed a friend or someone to date because of the way that person looked, we never even gave them a chance? I bet many of us can say, we've done that.

How many people have agreed to go on a blind date, and was like when they seen the person, and couldn't even have a good time cuz they couldn't get beyond their looks. It is sad, but so true in many cases. Society has everything focused on looks, weight, style....It is sad.

Storm and I did.

btw Bush was born with no Charisma what so ever IMO

great going at getting politics in this fire

I think physical beuty in a relationship is imprtant. no matter who you are. I dont think it should be the dominating aspect in a relationship, unless that is all your after. To me personally physical appearances are not the first thing i look for, but arent the last. If i cannot be physicaly attracted to someone, then i cannot be truly satisfied. As long as i am moderately attracted to another person that is fine. This may change with age for me, but i am still young and though a physical relationship isnt the most imporatant thing to me, it is still an important experience i want.

Sorry but I was discussing this with Storm and the ppl most reliant on Charisma these days are political and religious leaders.

Some ppl imo are born with a lot of Charisma: Gandhi, Mandela, Hitler, The Dalai Lama and so forth, others are thought: Bush (those ppl rely on Ghost Writers and stuff)

I think that good looks is in the back of your mind when you meet someone. But I also look at things like if the person is being rude or not, and then I might think about their personality.

The fact of the matter is - Most everyone feels surface beauty in important, that's usually the basis of every first impression when you meet someone. And it's near impossible to have a relationship with someone who doesn't at least have a few phyiscal attributes that you are attracted to.

The people who say "I don't care about looks, I care more about what's on the inside" are usually lying their ass off"

well, there goes my second post of the thread up in flames

surface beauty is important to a degree .

Getting back to the charisma comment, yes I have witnessed it many times. However it may not have been charisma. But many a time on the street I see a couple, and one half of the couple looks nothing like the stereotype you would associate the other with.

What I mean is, you could see a beautiful young lady, with all the right assets, and beside her, someone you wouldn't even give a second glance to. It's mind boggling.

I mean you think to yourself, if it's not over money or whatever, what could they possibly have in common But you never know.

well it always has to do wiv physical attraction but not everyone has the same taste.

But I suppose it could happen, I think sometimes people just give off an aura, and you are drawn to them like before mentioned, but like someone stated, that could be grown and nourished, and you aren't neccesarily born with it

I think Storm said you can nurture and improve your natural Charisma

I partialy agree with that statement, but only to a certain extend can Charisma be nurtured or improved, and that extend is a lot smaller than the portion with which you are born.

I think that society today puts way too much emphasis on surface beauty, and it's kind of sad. You could have someone that is plain-looking, and they could have the greatest personality, but since they're not what most people consider beautiful, they won't have a chance unless they get lucky.

Me, I'm a believer of "beauty is in the eye of the beholder", and that personality is much more important than looks.

Surface beauty is only there so that YOU can look good with that pretty gal or that handsome man on your arm !

Admit it y'all.....you wouldn't be seen dead with an ugly dog on your arm would you ?

It all goes to personal rep !

because an ugly dog scares the girls away and a young pup attracts them?

ok what it is with most people is that yes, you need to be "beautiful" on the inside...but beintbeautiful on the outside helps. its as simple as that.

obviously, if someone on the street was to approach one out of two people....an attractive one (like me diva) or an unnatracctive one (like yerss cry) its obvious they'd choose me diva







note: for all you who dont know me, yes, i am kidding

you wish girl... I'm so darn popular that if I just open my door here, people storm my house in to ask me out on dates
and Brad Pitt is one pesky stalker I tell you! *snap snap*

you think thats good darlin? pft i get people storming into my house anyways without my opening the door diva mind you, i guess its hard now that i have my security gards, and my security dogs schmoll you wouldnt beleive what people would to just to say something to me shock

there is a difference between people asking you out for a day (like they do with me) and people saying you have to stop going through their trash to get some food, girlfriend!

surface beauty is more important that anyway is willing to admit

it's important that you should be physically attracted to your partner, but they don't have to be necessarily "classic beauties" to be attractive

I always look for beauty inside - in the heart, soul and mind. I usually find that, although a person may be visually pleasing, unless they have some sort of inner light to them, the outer beauty rapidly loses its attraction

and you're dropdead gorgeous on the inside phoe
... if only you would show your outside here

The outside's pretty foul... but anyone who dislikes me because of that is not worthy of my astounding company!

that's mean of you to say ...even of yourself

Oh I love you phoe hysterical

I'ts as important as you make it

*hugs to silver and yerss*

hug *huggles*

you made my day phoe

*feels proud*

it's noble to do so

Looks are important. They are many times the first thing on which you base your opinion of an individual. I know many times, it's the only thing on which I have based an opinion. Sure, it's shallow to base your intrest in someone who is good looking, but it's also basic human nature. It's nature period. All animals do it. Be it feathers or horns or blue eyes. Sure, we have "evolved" to higher level and attraction should have more to do with personality, but it doesn't. It never will...at least not initially.

Now, that being said, I've met some guys I wouldn't normally find attractive, but after I got to know them I began to be attracted to them. Sometimes, you learn to put aside those needs for chisled features and blue eyes in favor of the way someone can make you smile or feel. That's where the "evolved" part come in. But I don't ever think it will be the initial quality that we seek as humans.

you dont expect me to believe that do you?....well i can beleive it to an extent...but i think everyone is all "oh its nice to have but not important" ...what a bunch of shit...if its not so important how come women drool over people like cruise, pitt, and kutcher without even knowin them...looked at all those gawd damn orlando bloom names...iluvorlando, orlandoluvsme....jeezus...how about being original for a change

Cruise Pitt and Orlando are just pretty faces, we'll never really meet them ((a bit like boys and Jordan, Pammy and all other busty models)). For an ACTUAL RELATIONSHIP, women are far more likely to look past the face. My last three crushes have not been gorgeous - some of my friends even ask what I see in them - and I say they've got a great sense of humor, a lovely smile, and they make me feel happy inside whenever I'm with them.

*disappointed*
after all the time I placed in getting Pitts hair from the Mexican oh great

*starts practicing lovely smile* (hey, I already got the humor down )

so they may not have been GORGEOUS...but i bet they will still good lookin.....woman are for more likely to look past the face....c'mon....dont make me laugh.....its the face that gets the women interested in the 1st place

it's the style

I still think that the longer you are with someone the more beautiful they become, like what storm said aboot me

I thought they were lovely - which is NOT the same as good-looking. I think that stereotypical good looks are a turn off - more than likely, the guy KNOWS he's good-looking and it makes him a prat