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i hear much on this topic from alot of people....young and old . it varies from person to person . id like to know your opnion....

does spankings cause little montsers to behave and to respect their parents or do spankings cause little children to grow up to be monsters ?

for those who are comfortable with this question...

were you spanked as a child or not ? how did it effect your relationship with your parents ?

Teaching children that we deal with issues with physical violence is not something that I agree with. Let's see...a grown, much larger, adult, hitting a child to discipline them.
It doesn't mean that they grow up to be monsters, but it instills in them at a very early age that you solve things by hitting. What kind of message is that??

beat. your. children.

It's the American way! tomcat

Spanking had an opposite effect on me, I just got more angry.
Here in Norway you aint!!!! allowed!!!! to spank your kid any longer. Kindergarten and neighbours can "turn" you in if they found out you did and in the worst scenario one could loose custody of your own child.
I wouldnt have the heart to spank my kid and I aint sure it have the wanted effect either. It sure as hell didnt on me so, my parents gave up on that after me being their 3 rebelious child.

yep, i was spanked, and i will spank my children. i have seen kids who havent been spanked and they have no fear of their parents at all. when your kids dont fear you (to a certain extent) whats to stop them from doing anything they want and know they arent going to be spanked? they have no boundaries. they never know when they've officially "crossed the line". if you just discipline them they say "oh well they will get over it" and they go right back to where they were because your punishment had no long term effects on their attitude.

Fear? Did you say FEAR? That is the most pathetic piece of garbage I have ever heard in my life. Children should not FEAR their parents. They are not our 'possesions', they are our children. Just because they are small does not give you the right to hit them. SO tell me, when you get old, and senile and don't do what your kids want, should they beat your stupid ass so that you fear them?

ok. what keeps people from doing things? love? maybe. joy? no. fear? yes. when youre a kid you dont do something because youre "scared" of what your parents will think. if the child has had no real discipline, they have no fear of crossing the line.

and no i stopped getting spanked years ago. youre twisting what im saying. i never said "spank your children until you die".

The problem herein lies buried underneath a more pressing issue:

Do our youth have TOO much freedom?

If a child is acting up, disobediant, or a downright hellspawn, they need to be punished. A "Time-Out" will not do it. Not every household can solve disputes like the Tanners of Full House. If your child is acting up, boot the little punk in the ass! Punish him! Do not let the child blackmail you with threats of notifying child services.

There is a fine line between discipline and abuse.

i agree.

With me?

If you do a good job of PARENTING there is no need for your kids to have to fear you! Children respond to the pain being inflicted on them. So, in other words, you're a piece of shit as a parent, so, in order to gain CONTROL, you resort to hitting. That is very VERY mature.

dont begin to tell me about maturity. you claim your a ****ing moose!

i will raise my kid the way i want. and dont try to push your dumbass views on me.

I would hope that there are no 18 year olds in the world being spanked if they sneek a cookie before dinner.

he assumed that i said that. i never did. i stopped getting spankings at like 8 years old.

You're right, I truly believe I'm a moose.

You can raise them whatever way you want ****nuts, go for broke, but when your kids hate you 20 years from now, or whenever you get out of puberty, you'll understand. You're a ****ing kid. And obviously harbour many issues from the beatings your own ****ed up parents put on you.

Has anyone seen the show Desperate Housewives?

In the 1st or 2nd episode. This single mother has triplets, and they go to a Wake for this lady who commited suicide. Do you know what these kids did at the wake? They jumpe in the swimming pool. And when their mother told them to get out of the pool, they said no to her. Her children said no to her and told her they weren't going to get out of the pool.

Beating your children would have prevented such a scene.

Instead. the woman had to go into the pool, while wearing her black dress, just to physically drag them out. Those children have no fear of discipline nor do they respect their mother.

um no i dont. I STOPPED GETTING SPANKED AT 8 YEARS OLD.

and i never said beat them to bruises! i meant just one spank. not abuse.

I am by not means going to venture on a bloodlust tangent when it comes to raising children. You warn the child, you warn them again, and then you act as is needed.

If the child will not respond to your dictation of proper behaviour, then they need to face the consequences. There are many factors to take into consideration when determining a proper set of disciplinary guidelines.

Age, childs tendencies to misbehave, defining a mischievous act are three of the many examples.

my dad beat the living shit out of my ass with a belt when I did things that I knew I wasn't supposed to do. Mostly when I did hyperactive stuff that 6-10 year olds do.

I have a better relationship with my father than anyone on KMC...bar none.

Beating your children does not directly relate to the relationship you will grow up to have with them.

Oh Puhlease! Now we're quoting abusrd TV shows.

If you DO your JOB as a parent, beating a child is not neccesary. They are ****ing CHILDREN! If you do something wrong and the cops or your neighbours beat on you for it, you would raise holy hell, claiming how wrong it was, but you'll do it to a defenceless child.
What a bunch of trash in here.

if you dont like it, dont read it. and dont post your shit in here either.

No, I was never beaten and I have a better relationship with MY father than anyone. I respect him because he didn't have to 'whip my ass with a belt' to get me to listen - he DID his job.

instead of spanking one can withdraw some privileges children have, like no tv for some days and so on

You're going to stop me kid? You useless.

good for you that you have a great relation with your dad, dont go out claiming you have a better relation with your fathre than anyone cause that is a matter of an opinion and not a fact

First of all there is a difference between beating your children and spanking them. AND....being a parent for 22 years now, I can tell you there is absolutely nothing wrong with your children have a good healthy fear of the parents. There were many times I stopped myself from doing something completely stupid because of the fear of what my father would do to me if he found out about it. It's because some children think they are on equal footing as their parents that todays kids are so damned screwed up as it is. Your children aren't your possessions BUT they are your responsibility to see that they turn out to be law abiding productive people. I was spanked as a child and I deserved every one of them I got. I spanked my children (notice I said spanked not beat) and my oldest daughter tells me she will spank her kids. The time out thing is a joke. Oh and for the record I harbor no deep seated feelings of resentment towards my parents they did what they had to do to bring a little hellion like myself in line.

Mane and Canadian Moose give it a rest.

I was responding to his claim that his father beat him and he had a better relationship with his father...I was making a point.

fair enough,............... whats next then my dad is stronger than your dad

FINTI!!!!!!!! Still going spoiler free I see! I miss ya

LMAO...no, mine is.

how absurd?

apparently you don't read the news. worst things happen than children jumping into a swimming pool.

and spanking your children to instill discipline at an early age is a far shot different than an independent grown man geating beat down by a neighbor or cop.

Infact, i'd love to see a cop or my neighbor give me a spanking, or pull my pants down and hit me with a belt.

Now who's being absurd?

Like I said before, there is a fine line between abuse and decipline.

If you child does not require extream discipline like physical violence, as was apparent in your youth, then so be it. That is great.

If a child is a disobediant AT A WAKE as was the case in Links example, then what choice do you have? "Get out of the pool or it is time out for you when you get home, Mister?"

We are not saying put a lead pipe, a nine iron and a medievil mase on the kitchen table and telling the child to pick which one to be bludgened with, we are saying that if a child is as disobediant as some are, there are certain measures that must be taken.

My God, when will extreamist ***s stop breeding.

I am something of a pacifist myself, but if the need be, the need be. I do everything I can to avoid violence... sometimes it cannot be avoided.

and what happens when they just go into the living room and turn on the television anyways?

what are you going to do?

You cannot monitor the child 24/7. There will be a time when the child will sneak the "revoked privelages" without you knowing.

I did it myself!

Link you are so are target. It should be noted that a spanking is on the rear end with an open hand IMHO> Not with a belt or any other instrument or a fist.

there are ways to avoid that

wow...I respect my father for the person he is. For the work he does to keep a roof over my head, to keep food on my plate, and clothes on my back.

Not because he didn't have to whip my ass with a belt (which was an exaggerated statement)

Guess we all have different views of what constitutes a good relationship.

not in my house

like?

take away the remote? What happens if they just start changing them manually?

you're 6 years old, what do you know about respect if you can still get whatever you want?

Be a PARENT! I have 2 children and I have never even CONSIDERED laying a hand on them. If you know HOW to parent, you don't need to resort to that sort of stuff. Spanking results because the parent doesn't know what else to do. They are lost and cannot do what they are supposed to do.

Like I said before. YOU CANNOT MONITOR THEM 24/7 as well.

And there are no ways of perminantly removing said privelages for the alotted amount of time.

oh I don't know about that....i sure the hell know that wooden laddle scarred the crap outta me more than a hand.

Spanking may be a temporary fix to a problem. It may even permanently stop a certain behavior, but the damage being done is worse than whatever the behavior was. A child who is regularly spanked will learn to fear their parents. As that child grows older he will seek ways to withdraw from an untrusting and scary relationship. Most parents will have stopped spanking by seven or eight, but by then the idea is already ingrained into the child that if he does something wrong he will get hurt. This leads to children who try to hide their mistakes from their parents because of fear. Spanking can lead to physical and emotional damage.

There are several other methods of discipline, including time out, natural consequences and redirection.

REspect isn't given, it's earned! You don't just RECEIVE it with your parental 'rights'.

my kid doesnt get all she wants

Just like dvd players have a parential lock todays tv can be locked with a code, at least mine can. (And I better remeber that code or else no one can unlock it )

ME TOO!!!

I love it when you talk filthy. Do you have any pics?

Discipline does not equal violence. No need to spank a child. When a child needs to be discipline he should be punish using other methods than spanking.

You sound as if you work in the field. Redirection works so well.

ok ok how old are your children? And I disagree. I have been in complete control when I spanked my children. A beating constitutes a loss of control.

oh no, what about allowance then

Storm I feared my father big time! But I never ever doubted his love for me either. And redirection does not work on all children. I am not saying to spank first. But it is sometimes the only alternative.

i keep hearing "other methods" but no one other than finti is willing to give an example.

And when i was a child, there were no such things as parental locks on televisions and the alike.



Just a question, a little off topic, but still about discipline.

What does everyone feel about sending a child to their room without dinner as a form of punishment?

My children are 3 and 5 at the age when they are into everything and defiant and testing their limits.

Of course, if I can't get them to RESPECT me and LISTEN to me and DO WHAT I DAMN WELL TELL THEM TO DO, I'll just smack them. It should get their attention.

never feared my father, but I did respect him a lot

bullsh!t.

you haven't even reached the age of defiance yet. Wait until one is 9 and the other is 7. then you tell me about "earning respect."

your children are still crying when they don't get the toy they want at Toys R Us.

there are now

depends on whats for dinner, my parents used that sort of punishment a lot until they realised I rasied hell just to get out of having fish for dinner

I think this is all a matter of personal preference. What works for some doesnt work for others.

oh yes those are the truely fun times

A child will act up if they get the urge. Sometimes they do no know any better and a heart to heart conversation will set them right. If they push the envelope, they need a wake-up call. They cannot do that.

The world will not be so leniant on them. They need to learn how it is.

*shrugs* They do that already. It's not a big deal. Or my 3 year old throws herself on the ground in the middle of a store screaming, enough to get my blood boiling...and after asking her to get up, and she is stubborn, I'd be best to go over and slap her ass. I'd feel pretty damn powerful then.

I assume that I slaped my son in his arse one or two times in five years. And that was enough. And I am not proud of it but it seemed to be the best option at that time. But now I am sure it wasnt

I dont shout to him and avoid to scare him.

Respect is built by both: father/mother/son

As bad as spanking is to do not have respect in your relationship.

Your example will be follow by your childs

My son respect me and I dont have to use any kind of extreme measures. Just some withdraw of privileges as Finti wrote.

sneaking that "punishment" is part of our life. What matther is fathers attitude.

I avoid spanking and I was never was spanking

And what Link said about spanking in USA makes me understand easily what is happening in that country of believers. If your quote is true I wish you welcome to the Third world in educational and social politics.

And answering to Finti and Canadian mouse..yours fathers can be strongers but mine was smarter :P

Agreed, but I have seen the handiwork of children who have suffered at the hands of parents. First hand.

Time Out
Time-out should be used to separate a child from a situation. When a child is getting into things and has been warned he needs a time out to think about his behavior and to stop the progression of his actions. The time-out should only be about one minute per year old the child is. After the child has sat in a room by himself without an audience for this length of time, the parent needs to go in and talk to him. Ask him if he knows what he did wrong, if he doesn' t tell him. Tell him why it was wrong. Then the most important part is to give him a hug, so that he knows it is not you punishing him because you are mad at him or don' t like him, but he is simply suffering the consequences of his actions. Last the child should make restitution if needs be. That means if he made a mess, he should clean it up, if he hurt someone he should say he' s sorry.

Natural Consequences
This means mom and dad aren' t always the bad guys. When you can simply let the consequences of your child' s actions teach what behaviors are acceptable. When your daughter breaks a toy she doesn' t get that toy anymore. Don' t buy her another one and don' t necessarily fix it even if you can. Your daughter will soon learn to take care of her things. If your son doesn' t take his dirty clothes to the laundry room don' t go get them and don' t nag. When he runs out of things to wear he' ll understand why this behavior is required.

Another form of natural consequences may not be quite as natural, but is very effective. Sit down with your family and discuss the rules. You suggest some and let them suggest some. Then discuss the consequences if these rules are not followed. Children will often think of much harsher punishments then you will. When you agree write the rules down followed by the consequences if they are broken. This works especially well with teenagers. Next time a child breaks a rule refer to the list of consequences. You are not the bad guy, it was their own choice and now they must be held accountable.

Redirection
When a child is little he forgets easily and often his emotions come before his thoughts. At this stage a child may strike out or throw tantrums. Try to stop these by watching out for them and redirect the child before they start. If you see your daughter come and take away your sons toy, instead of scolding or spanking, simply take the toy and give it back. Then ask your daughter if she wants to come help you cook or play or anything else as long as it is appealing to that child. The key is to offer the child something else to do to get his mind off whatever was about to cause a fight.

so what do you do when:



or does that not happen because your children respect you?

darn... I had another idea of the spanking

It happens because they are children. Children act like children. If they get into a confrontation at school, do you want them to automatically resort to physical violence? Because that is what they will learn. "Well, when mom and dad are mad at me, they hit me, so I guess that is what I do too" and in today's day and age, I don't want my kids to start that, because the other guy is likely to have a knife.

In a nutshell, the act of punishment depends solely on:

a) The childs age
b) the situation
c) the PARENT MAKING THE DECISION.

If a child misbehaves in public you order (yes ORDER becuase is quite obvious discipline must be enforce) to stop it! If he disobeys the order then wait till get home and punish him/her take away toys and TV and make them sit at the corner.

it's not true, it's a gross exageration. Note the Tomcat smilie i used next to it.

and what pre-tell is going on in this "country of believers" ???

I'm not nearly as violent as my arguement leads on. I am a very patient person when dealing with other people's problems in real life and I personally feel it would take a whole hell of a lot more than a tantrum or a public scene for me to strike out at my child.

But i most certainly wouldn't say that a child couldn't push me over the edge to the point where I would spank them. Especially after putting in a 9 hour day at work...

woah...even more absurd comments

how about the logic "ok, when i piss off my parent, and continue to constantly annoy them and push their buttons...it causes them to hit me"

not "i said "no" to my dad, and he punched me in the face"

and we're talking about disciplining 6-10 year olds....how many freaking 6-10 year old kids bring knives to shank their fellow students if they get into a fight?

Moose do you know what I think of when I see a child that throws themselves on the floor throwing a temper tantrum like that in a store? My exact thought is someone needs to pick that kid up and give them a pop on the ass.

I dont buy into to this ignore the behavior and it will stop stuff. Why does everyone has to listen to your kids screaming and whining?

Ok. Link. My apologizes for my exageration too

And get some patiente bcs I work about 12 hours a day and I always get patiente

Ummm...do YOU read the news? There are LOTS of things like that happening. Kids in grade school...bringing knives and guns to school. so no THAT is not an absurd comment.

My ex husband has two daughters that were aged 4 & 5 when we first got married. The youngest had a bad habit of deciding she didnt want to walk anymore in a store or whatever and she would throw herself on the floor and scream bloody murder. After about 4 months of this crap, she pulled that on me when we were at a local grocery store. I grabbed her by the arm up off the floor and popped her ONE on the ass and it never ever happened again.

and what happens if they continue to misbehave in public the entire time that you are out because you are not willing to do more to discipline them?

You haven't solved the current problem, all you've done is push it aside until you can get home to do something about it.

what's your angry tone going to do to a child, if they don't fear what results from that angry tone?

"woah, dad's about to burst a blood vessel in his head he's so mad....oh well, guess i'll just keep running around making a scene...he won't do anything to me"

And you are entitled to opinion, that is fine. Like I said, I've seen the effects that it can have on children and I don't agree. I just can't stand comments like
i have seen kids who havent been spanked and they have no fear of their parents at all. when your kids dont fear you (to a certain extent) whats to stop them from doing anything they want and know they arent going to be spanked?

Children should not have to fear their own parents.

Yep that was the serious part of my reply

Must have made you feel pretty powerful.

Huh? You didn't post that!

yes i do.

And it most certainly doesn't happen "lots."

it's an extremely rare occurence that tends to happen in the worst neighbor hoods and school districts in the country.

6 year olds...are kindergarteners if i'm not mistaken. 7-10 year olds are as high as 3rd grade.

the number of third grade kids with knives at school are SIGNIFICANTLY less than the grade schools of 6-8 grade. And at that age discipline should already be instilled in the child.

LMAO its NOT ABOUT POWER! Its about teaching them that certain behaviors will not be tolerated PERIOD. Theres no powertrip in that. And I will tell you this...that Erin (that daughter) and I remain close to this day despite the fact that her father and I are divorced.

It is hidden somewhere in "welcome to the third world"

I was never spanked with a hand but i got hit daily with a switch on my ass. And i hated my mother and stepfather for it. *ofcourse i hated them anyways*
Seriously I think as a toddler a swat on the butt is ok. But not when they're older.

No, i dont think you should spank children. there are other ways of discipline

Im gonna go all Fraud on your asses now - its very important to have major patience with children from ages 3-6 [because that age is MAJORLY cruital) and no spanking, but re-direction and such. Children will develop respect for the parent more if the parent doesnt spank the kid. (also, it will not turn out to be a serial killer, a deviant or a sex offender - while Im already taking Freud's theory)

My mother never spanked me, nor was i physhcaly afraid what she might do to me if i did something wrong, instead my biggest fear was her being dissapointed in me or losing her trust in me, and thus me losing my privilages.

true, children should not generally fear their parents.

But children most certainly should fear their parents when they are angry.

there should be a clear line between pushing someone's buttons when they are in a good mood, and pushing their buttons when they are angry.

No person with an ounce of morality would strike a toddler.

I'm dissappointed in this thread. I had something...different in mind. I'm so dirty!

Beautiful sig Silver tongue, Darkness is one of the better comic characters out there. And Lara is hot

not hard and not on the face. Toddlers wear diapers so it doesn't hurt that bad. and what if they're doing something that they're not suppose to be doing and the won't stop?
They have to learn.

I highly doubt that makes me immoral

and the proof of that is where?

spanking your child is different than beating your child. If you beat your child, you will lose their respect.

some things can't just be "re-directed"

I agree I think alot of you are mistaking a spanking which is a swat to the booty with a beating.

I agree with this unlike my fellow spanking supporters.

There is an age at which children are too young and too old to be spanked. diapers...is entirely too young.

What about when they are 7-9 and get out of hand? What then? If they are disobediant and untamed. If they hit an age when the word no seems to be the extent of their vocabulary?

For lack of a better phrase...

"Desperate times call for desperate measures."

Untamed....hmm...And WHO'S fault is that>

Link Ive seen some pretty old children still in diapers.

I am in full support of spanking if it is NECESSARY.

If their are alternatives to physical punishment, then deturr from it. This much should be obvious.

I wish all fathers to spank theirselves instead or spank their children.

It would be a good educational measure to the spankers/fathers.

Children need to feel that if they make mistakes, they can correct them. Show them how to learn from their errors. Help them figure out what they did wrong and how they can avoid making similar mistakes in the future.

Storm just how do you do that in the middle of a full out screaming tantrum?

You don't take them out shopping anymore until they learn to behave in public. Eventually the message will get across.



Where else should I correct my child? In a public place? Are you suggesting that I should smack the child in public to prove that I'm in control? Bah! that's just showing off!



There is NO need for an angry tone if they child is discipline properly! I now have to use fear in order to discipline a child??? What kind of parenting is that??? The child needs to learn to respect not fear a spanking.



Do you honestly think that's what children are thinking when throwing a tamtrum?

There are limitations to what a parent can do. Teaching respect is all well and good... but if a child falls victim to uncontrollable factor, then all the respect and "parenting" flys out the window.

When no other options are available to a misbehaving child, spank the lil punk!

Now see, then you are just letting your child dictate when you can shop. Thats silly. They need to behave period. And if they know you wont correct them in a public place then they tend to act out more.

Lookit there sherlock, you dont say?

There are numerious proofs that the children can be conditioned just like we all can -- not absolutely obviously since we tend to think for ourselfs! Conditioning children by spaking doesnt acheave shit!

Oh no wait, are you gonna tell me you have a degree in Psychology now? Because If you do, I urge you to explain to me the supposed lack of evidence done on small children!

I'm not trying to be harsh or anything but,
Do you have children? No, so you have no idea when it is or isn't too young to spank your child. 1 or 2 year olds is fine. As long as you don't hit them hard. Just knowing that the parent is angry and feeling that little tap on their butt, hurts their feelings and makes them stop.

I really would like someone to explain to me how a small swat on the rear is so damaging. Seriously.

I used Freud to elain the CRITICAL age in children! Children just like adults get out of hand regardless of the age.

I would think at 7-9 age group the child could be reasoned with - there are other ways to discipline your children then spanking!

The more you spank the angrier they get and thus the more rebellious!

so who looks after your kids when you have to go shopping? You can't always have a baby sitter or a neighbor look after your kid. Sometimes they have to come with you, and some of those times they throw tantrums....just like the time before



If you had instilled discipline in them at home, PERHAPS by spanking them, then the only thing you would need to do is scold them with an angry tone and there would be no need to spank them because they fear the spanking in the future.



oh, so now if they are throwing a tantrum in a store, you aren't going to get angry with them. You're going to be perfectly calm while they are on the floor kicking, screaming, and crying.

and better yet, their fear of losing their toys or tv time is going to prevent any tantrum from happening in the future!

but tantrums aren't planned, they aren't well thought out, they are sporadic and spontaneous.



please refer above.

i agree.

a small thump on the butt is not going to physically hurt the kid, much less emotionally damage him for life.

I see it more as teaching them a lesson. Eventually you will talk to them and tell them "You continue to misbehave when going shopping you are not coming". Children love to go to the stores. But if you sit down and talk to them about their behavior they will realize they were they doing some thing wrong. Isn't communication always important?

You can not expect a 3-4 year old to understand this. They forget half the things you tell them in 5 minutes..

What about when they are 7-9 and get out of hand? What then? If they are disobediant and untamed. If they hit an age when the word no seems to be the extent of their vocabulary?

Once again, I ask, WHO'S FAULT IS IT IF THE CHILD IS 'UNTAMED' as you so neatly put it?

Moose you are looking at things from the perspective of a parent who has yet to face alot of stuff. It gets much harder the older they get.

I'm saying it from the perspective of a parent who has too much respect for my children than to lower myself to hitting them, swat on the ass or otherwise. What exactly gives you the RIGHT to hit them?

That furthers my previous statement that was something of a stab at Mr. Zero.

That is being a little extream. Sometimes a 7-9 year old cannot be reasoned with. I am the poster boy for pacifism for the most part, but sometimes there are little options left. When a heart to heart, a "grounding," and a "stand in the corner" fail... what options are left to explore?

Granted there are more punishments, I am trying to summarize a stand-point. I hope you all understand.

I elaborated. Perhaps you missed that?

You can parent all you want.. a child will misbehave if they CHOOSE to.

yet another wise as comment from the queen herself.

just once, i'd love it if you could make a comment without a some sort of b!tchy pretext remark...just once.

and where is your proof that spanking your children doesn't achieve shit?
go ahead Sherlock...I'm breathing proof that it does achieve shit. But, wait...you can prove that it doesn't...

"Because If you do, I urge you to explain to me the supposed lack of evidence done on small children!"

lack of evidence done on small children. I'm no English Major...so please I urge you...explain what the hell that means exactly

Then sit down and talk to them about behaving in public! Is it really that hard to discipline a child before going shopping? What? you can't tell the kid to act properly BEFORE going into a store?




Link, in order to be in control a person must always Always be calm! If you lose your temper then you don't gain anything.



How about telling them when they are throwing a tamtrum: Remenber last time you mishave? That's right! NO TV and NO Toys. That will get their attention.

There are people who have NEVER spanked their children. Do you think those people just left their children to roam around free throwing tantums and when they grew up they somehow magicaly became nice people?

And what if the child is to young to comprehend what you're saying? Then what?

You don' t in the middle of a tantrum but once you get home.

Oh, you definitely hit them...what else CAN you do?

Because I am the parent. My children are NOT repeat NOT on equal footing with the parent EVER!! Not even my 2 children who are grown and in college. I will ALWAYS be the parent and they will ALWAYS be my child. I seriously think thats whats wrong with half the bloody country today. All this crap about respecting your children. Your children respect YOU not the other way around. If a person steps back and looks at the country around the time of its general decline as far as kids getting into as much trouble as they do today alot of it stems from the whole liberal movement on parenting. If you go back before I was born even (which is 1961), there werent children bringing guns to school etc etc etc. Because the parent commanded respect and 90% of the time recieved it. AND they werent living in fear of discipling their child.


btw LB I love your av

Express yourself in a matter they will understand. If they are too young to understand, then just keep them under close watch. I mean they are just little children. Physical abuse like spanking isn't good at a young age.

so what you are saying is everyone in the store is at the mercy of your screaming child as far as their enjoyment of their shopping?

And there are people who DO spank their children... and their children are not harbouring deep resentment and repressed violent tendencies.



I know you have better then that, Milla

I've raised 2 children and i'm raising another one ok! I know how to take care of them! A little swat is not going to kill them. I'm not like my mother who'd take switches paddles, wooden shoe and anything else. A little swat is fine!

WD, i totally agree with you in that regard. I am a firm believer in sitting down and talking to your children...trying to gain their understanding and their respect. But they are children. Children are like walking talking cases of A.D.H.D.

you go into the store thinking, "sweet, they are behaving" But then you get to the check out line and demand that candy...and when you say no....Tantrum time.

Of course, i would still tell them about their previous disciplines of losing TV and toys. But what happens if they still throw a tantrum?

I use spanking as a LAST resort...never the first.




what are you gaining by being calm?
you were calm before, you were upset by your child, obviously you will attempt to calm yourself down before you repremand them. But what happens NEXT?

what happens when talking calm and reason doesn't work with a 6 year old?



I agree with this as well, but what happens if they don't care about their tv or toy....what if all they want is what's in front of them at the time. And you saying no, is what causes them to have such tunnel vision?

Well, that is pretty damn sad that you can't even respect your children. After all, they ARE human too.

your canadian. i rest my case.

I agree, obviously you always want to try something else before hitting your child, but if nothing works you HAVE to do something

And you're an *******, what's your point.

great one though. Pretty damn inventive of you.

Can you go away, I'll ignore you later.

like SG said earlier, you warn, warn again, and then act as needed.

I never threw a tantrum in a store nor did my brother or sister. We were raised that way by our parents. I understood it was inappropriate.
And when we were too young to understand, we didn' t get the chance to throw a tantrum because we were supervised by our parents.

As WD said.

has anyone yet clarified what is so physically and emotionally damaging about a swift pat on the butt?

It does absolutely nothing. This is so stupid. Most of you parents probably swatted you atleast once in your lives and you're just fine now

You concur with me for the most part?

yep.

i got spankings and i thank my parents that i dont act like some of the kids my age who didnt get them. buncha hellions.

Storm I understand that I really do. But not all children are this way. Kids just aren't built the same and there is no specific formula for raising them. I think we all do what works for each of us.

Moose, I'm not even going to have this argument with you. You are trying to goad me into saying I have some kind of powertrip with my kids. Its simply not going to happen. There IS no powertrip and you can spout all the liberal parenting tips you can pull out of your mind, BUT I'm 43 Ive raised 2 kids through to adulthood and I did it MY way and they are fine. And the little one will be too. And not a damn one of them has "issues" with me. As I said before what works for one parent may not work for another. But the facts are right there in front of you. Kids today are waaaaaaaaaaay worse than they were back in the day and the ONLY people to blame for that are the parents and the liberal parenting. Period.

yeah i do. youre cool, just not CM.

Well, that depends on Who is giving that swift pat. Are you talking about a Parent that is about 350lbs applying the pat on the butt to a 3 year old?

oh please.......your weight has nothing to do with it. Its the amount of force behind the swat.

Ouch, that hurts. Some useless meaningless doofus doesn't think I'm cool. I need to re-think my life now.

hahaha yeah thats stupid. i weigh 200 lbs and my 135 lb friend hits harder than me, and hes like 7 inches shorter than me.

i totally agree

I gain control by being calm and I act out reason NOT emotion. If talking and discipline a child doesn't work then there is something the kid is expericing that he/she is not telling you. Maybe you should pay more attention to his behavior. Because something is deffenetly going on inside that kid. You are the parent so is your duty to investigate.



That's an "IF". The reply above applies here too.

Moose, I'm not even going to have this argument with you. You are trying to goad me into saying I have some kind of powertrip with my kids. Its simply not going to happen. There IS no powertrip and you can spout all the liberal parenting tips you can pull out of your mind, BUT I'm 43 Ive raised 2 kids through to adulthood and I did it MY way and they are fine. And the little one will be too. And not a damn one of them has "issues" with me. As I said before what works for one parent may not work for another. But the facts are right there in front of you. Kids today are waaaaaaaaaaay worse than they were back in the day and the ONLY people to blame for that are the parents and the liberal parenting. Period.

Honestly, i'm not trying to goad you into anything.
congratulations on raising your kids as you see fit. I disagree with the techiques, and you probably did it the 'most correct' way possible, but with people like Mane spouting off his misinformed, juvenile retorts, it doesn't help YOUR arguments.
kids are worse than before, I agree, but that has more to do with the parents not doing what they should. There is a lot of APATHETIC parenting, not to be confused with "liberal" as you put it. I don't agree with corporal punishment just as you agree WITH IT. So be it. I'm not trying to say you are a bad parent, because I don't for one minute believe that.

well thank you for that.