Castor
I wrote this for my english class, its spposed to be satire.
"Queer Eye for the Wrestling Guy"
As a young man in my junior high school years I became interested in wrestling. Unfortunately for me, I did not know about junior leagues. Fortunately for me, I was not exposed to the horrible truths of wrestlers and the sexual orientations. After all, what sane heterosexual male would want to join a sport where all of the participants are gay.
It became quite clear to me through conversations with friends and others involved in the sport that it wrestling is an inherently gay activity. Consider all of those Greek and Roman champions, gladiators and kings who were not only scholars and warriors but also studied basic forms of combat, like wrestling. What does that mean? It means that Mark Anthony and all of the other Roman and Greek heroes we look up to were also homosexual. Look at Julius Caesar who, even though he was often accompanied by the FINE Cleopatra and had a strong pimp hand, preferred the company of me. Why would he have it any other way?
Seriously speaking, I have been assured by some my homosexual friends that while breaking a nail and keeping up with the latest fashion trends are on the top of their priority lists, this in no way insinuates that they would not be able to wrestle. After all, every gay man enjoys a good violent conflict, or intense weight cutting. Every fragile man wants to be apart of one of the most difficult sports in the world, am I right? The very fact that you have to clip your nails before every match wouldn¡¦t bother pretentious homosexual would it. No, not at all.
It would seem having a strong pimp and is incredibly common with wrestlers these days, despite the lack thereof at Western, because wrestlers are constantly in the company of beautiful women. But being around these beautiful creatures only makes wrestlers long for other guys. Yes, its true, the company of beautiful women makes them even more homosexual.
Honestly, look at all the famous people who have wrestle:
„X Kurt Cobain
„X Tony Siragusa, his wife and kids are just a front.
„X Ricky Williams
„X Kelly Gregg
„X Bo Jackson
„X Ray Lewis
„X Warren Sapp
„X Sugar Ray Leonard
„X Garth Brooks
„X And finally, the wrestler with the strongest pimp hand out there, Ludacris.
With such a solid argument how could I argue against all wrestlers being gay? I can¡¦t. So I have come to conclusion to just admit it. We're all gay: Ludacris, Ashton Kutcher, Charles Moose (The sniper guy), Abe Lincoln, Ulysses S. Grant, the ten American heroes who died in Iraq, and the Father of our country George Washington. There¡¦s no point in arguing any more now is there. Nope.
----------------------------------------
What you guys think?
"Queer Eye for the Wrestling Guy"
As a young man in my junior high school years I became interested in wrestling. Unfortunately for me, I did not know about junior leagues. Fortunately for me, I was not exposed to the horrible truths of wrestlers and the sexual orientations. After all, what sane heterosexual male would want to join a sport where all of the participants are gay.
It became quite clear to me through conversations with friends and others involved in the sport that it wrestling is an inherently gay activity. Consider all of those Greek and Roman champions, gladiators and kings who were not only scholars and warriors but also studied basic forms of combat, like wrestling. What does that mean? It means that Mark Anthony and all of the other Roman and Greek heroes we look up to were also homosexual. Look at Julius Caesar who, even though he was often accompanied by the FINE Cleopatra and had a strong pimp hand, preferred the company of me. Why would he have it any other way?
Seriously speaking, I have been assured by some my homosexual friends that while breaking a nail and keeping up with the latest fashion trends are on the top of their priority lists, this in no way insinuates that they would not be able to wrestle. After all, every gay man enjoys a good violent conflict, or intense weight cutting. Every fragile man wants to be apart of one of the most difficult sports in the world, am I right? The very fact that you have to clip your nails before every match wouldn¡¦t bother pretentious homosexual would it. No, not at all.
It would seem having a strong pimp and is incredibly common with wrestlers these days, despite the lack thereof at Western, because wrestlers are constantly in the company of beautiful women. But being around these beautiful creatures only makes wrestlers long for other guys. Yes, its true, the company of beautiful women makes them even more homosexual.
Honestly, look at all the famous people who have wrestle:
„X Kurt Cobain
„X Tony Siragusa, his wife and kids are just a front.
„X Ricky Williams
„X Kelly Gregg
„X Bo Jackson
„X Ray Lewis
„X Warren Sapp
„X Sugar Ray Leonard
„X Garth Brooks
„X And finally, the wrestler with the strongest pimp hand out there, Ludacris.
With such a solid argument how could I argue against all wrestlers being gay? I can¡¦t. So I have come to conclusion to just admit it. We're all gay: Ludacris, Ashton Kutcher, Charles Moose (The sniper guy), Abe Lincoln, Ulysses S. Grant, the ten American heroes who died in Iraq, and the Father of our country George Washington. There¡¦s no point in arguing any more now is there. Nope.
----------------------------------------
What you guys think?
Why would u even post a thread about the discussion of all wrestlers being gay? That is so wrong its not even funny. Yes the Greeks were almost all homosexual, why would they half naked statue of guys every where. Even a older man would teach a younger man way back then how to date but in the mean time have sex with him. 