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I write poetry a lot but it's always too "soft" for a rock song... Anybody have rock lyrics of their own? Writing good lyrics is harder than it looks..

i write lyrics all the time .. they suck thoug ..

nope never tried

i write lyrics im the vocalist in a band i can post some of my work if you like

im the drummer of my band .. i try to make some songs.. but they never work

if i tried it would sound like simple plan i don't wan to do that because they suck.

I should try, i havent tried but i was thinking about it.

it is hard .... thats all i got to say ..

i've written a lot, but my hopes of being in a band have dwindled. I have a few things here and there if you need help with a couplet or something.

Please do

I'm a drummer in a band, but also a damn good lyricist. I love writing, and it seems to come naturally to me. Most of the stuff I write is politically or religiously based, being that I'm heavily influenced by punk. I, too, will post some stuff if you guys are interested.

heres a song i wrote called terra its about a convo i had in a bar

terra

terra
betrayed be god
terra
betrayed by god
terra
betrayed by god
terra

take a look inside of a mirrors eyes
tell me do you see some you like
to religion you devote all of life
but when night fall comes you give your self to so many guys

then the next day
you pray all you sins away
all in the comfort
of your churche and your cross
when realalize
and see through all the lies
but in the end its your soul that is lost

terra
betrayed be god
terra
betrayed by god
terra
betrayed by god
terra
betrayed by god

you condem the way that i live my life
well take alook at your self becuese its just not right
up on your high horse living a lie
i see through you mask and your ****ing diguise

you can help your self some more
deep inside your core
just wait pataintly
and quit trying to
change me
all will be told in time

terra
betrayed be god
terra
betrayed by god
terra
betrayed by god
terra
betrayed by god

as the end, it draws nearer, many can't help, help but fear, for everything, that's so dear
{god}
freedom is here, already rung, many will be, they will be hung, it will be death, the song you sung
{lies}

many will be, barried alive, it is to live, that you will strive, only with luck, will you survive
{god}
the fear of death, keeps you alive, killing you, helps me survive, your suffering, will help me strive
{lies}

you'll say you'll pray for me and i cannot see why
you say i need saving and im mix up inside
i wish you would take a minute and just step back
and see what say just might be right

you can open your minds door
stop being such a whore
you time is now
the end is near
say you last prair hope it helps my dear

terra
betrayed be god
terra
betrayed by god
terra
betrayed by god
terra
betrayed by god

awesome

thanks man its much better with the music behind it as soon as i have soe mp3 online i will post links to those

cool from what i gathered from your lyrics you sound pretty dark, what kinda band would you say you are?

now thats the hard part i guese it just depends on who is describing us we dont sound like anyone else so its hard to compare us to other bands
but we have been described as
thrash metal
death metal
so i guese we fall some where between those two but then we also throw in melodie with my vocals sometimes and my grolws are more inteligabal then most deathmetal bands so i dont know as soon as we finish are demo im planing on mailing a copie to who ever is intrested

heres another song i wrote

DIE HARD

You will try to destory our lives but you cant keep us controled
Wont believe your rules their just old tools tp make us do what were told
pills are what they use
to keep us subdued
dosile and overdosed
treat everyone the same way
allways ****ing happy
as they turn us to clones

i dont believe in it
what i cant see in it
i dont aggree in it
never push me again

when we meet die hard
in the streets die hard
when we meet die hard
people like me die hard

every day they will try to take away all your indavidaulality
they make you feel like your not reall and dont fit in the scheme of things
a padded cell
is where you dwell
when you dont aggree
there you'l stay
locked away
till your convinced your crazy

i dont believe in it
what i cant see in it
i dont aggree in it
never push me again

when we meet die hard
in the streets die hard
when we meet die hard
people like me die hard

you dont have to be afriad
there no one there to save you
live your life your way
they will try to change you
remember thats its just a game
the ****ing game that playes you
its all right to be strange
after they inslave you

bruise the body and break the will
medicate till we sit still
take and take they never get their fill

never let them get away with what they will do to you
we have to make them pay
a payment that way past due

dont you buy into their lie that they will try to sell to you
telling you whats cool as you play their fool its your mind they abuse

they bible tell us we'er sheep
how long will we be asleep
when will we awake from this dream
if you think im wrong
then answer why its your on your knees
when you pray

i dont believe in it
what i cant see in it
i dont aggree in it
never push me again

when we meet die hard
in the streets die hard
when we meet die hard
people like me die hard

people like us
die hard

that one is dope. its at times like this that really make me wonder how Linkin Park got famous, while guys who actually have talent like you arent even well known.

thanks man that actully meens alot to me when i hear shit like that
we should have a demo in the next couple of months and been playing infront of people since halloween so we have not been around enough yet to be noticed to much yet but dont worry we will as soon as i update the website this weekend i post a link for that to

I'm surprised that I didn't hate them. No offense, of course, it's just that so many people think they are good lyricists when they don't really know how to rhyme at all. So...all in all, good work.

my rock song would be alot of 'whoa's' and dirty looks

for why are you surprised my two songs deal with the same two topics
religion/lies

and some politics even though i left die hard cryptic so that most people would not know that

terra is about a woman at a bar that i met i was at a bar with my wife and some drunk religios freak came up and started telling me that i live my life wrong cuese the way i look and the music i listin and i need to go to churce becuese ive been living a bad life but what was funny is she was their cheating on her husband ****ing hippocrite

the second one die hard is about not giving in to all this politicly correct bullshit being your self and not let any one change and dont believe everything your told you know like when they tell you when your young that your supposed to be a demecrate just cuese your poor or when they tell you to love everyone and treat every one the same when every one is not the same

You're coming across as being rather arrogant, you know. Personally, I thought your lyrics were a little over the top.

loserib, those were sick 'specially the second one

thanks revan i really do apreciate that

Excuse me! Arrogant? I was paying him a compliment! Over the top? There's no such thing as over the top when you write.

Yes, I recognise that it was meant to be a compliment, but the "I'm surprised I didn't hate them" part sort of set the tone for the rest of the comment. And the arrogant part... I was referring to "I'm a drummer in a band, but also a damn good lyricist." Don't tell me that's not arrogant at least a little bit. Then you go on to imply that people shouldn't just think they're good lyricists, which is very true, but clearly that's what you think about yourself as well.

Yours were good, but they were... I just think they were a little too... Direct.. Like when I try to get something across with poetry, I don't come right out and say it, I just sort of hint at it so that you get the idea. I know everybody has their own style, that's just my personal opinion. Normally I don't mind it when people do that, but dealing with sensitive issues like the second one, that's just going to make a lot of people paranoid... IMHO, it might be one of those things that you just hint at, so people get the idea but it's not so... "in your face" if you know what I mean.

And no offense intended, just giving a little constructive criticism.

whoa jeff amazing shit dude
i write rock songs but if i posted them i be banned... anyway i dont have them right now

Thanks, both of you. Revan, I completely understand what you are saying, but sometimes "In your face" is the best way to get the messgae across. But I completely get what you're saying about indirectly telling people things.

I didn't mean to sound arrogant. I have people telling me all the time what a great writer I am, and that I should keep writing. By no means do I think I'm excellent. I write for my benefit, and my benefit alone. If somebody else reads them or hears them and likes them, then I feel great. I understand that they may terrify people and whatnot, but these are things that I feel should be addressed.

Y'know, the thread does have "Rock Lyrics" in the title...

Yes, that's true. There is a rap lyrics thread. I like them, though. I do that occasionally. I'll just start a flow on paper and really get into it. It's pretty fun to do.

Sorrrrrrry... I'll just go back to the Movie Forums now...

Or, on second thought, I'll open my mind and imagine a fiddle, banjo and steel geeetar playing behind my lyrics, making them 'country songs'... oops sorry again... open mind again, and imagine the Mormon Tabernacle Choir singing my Religious songs... errr, dammmit! soorrry, open mind again and re-read the topic line and then imagine electric guitar, bass and a rockin' rhythm and percussion section, blasting louder and harder over and above all the words, throw in some gutteral screams and demonic howls, and call them 'rock songs'...

point being, open your mind, use imagination and the lyrics could fit into whatever genre you desire... I hit on 6 of the 7 words in the topic, with a couple good 'song/poem/lyrics' whatever you want to call em...

my bad for attempting to show interest in other area of this so called community... didn't mean to go all 'off topic' or on some wacked out tangent or anything...

ROCK ON, BROTHERS! PEACE, OUT! GOOD NIGHT!

I didn't mean that in a bad way at all..

i dont flow but i have two friends that do and i will be on their records i also have a cousin who lives in san jose thats in a group called most loon

No big deal really Darth Revan... I just don't usually browse or post much to many of the forums here, so when I see a topic that does catch some interest I post to it, whatever I got, rather than suddenly deciding to go search for a more 'suitable' place that more precisely fits the crap I write...

didn't mean to cause a stir, so I'm glad you didn't mean it in a bad way... guess I took it wrong

no big woop

I said I didn't mind, either. I write "flows" sometimes, too.

well lets keep this thread going heres another one i wrote titlled L.S.D

L.S.D

come with me
and ill take away
all your pain
make your feel free again
close your eyes
count to ten
come with me

feel it deep within your spine
peace has been denied
slowly your brain fries
deeper and deeper you fall
so you convince your self your allright
that everything is fine
nowing damn well your lifes a lie
but no ones there to hear your calls

so you hide away from your self
slowly turning away everyone else
fear is all that you have left
all you left is to pray for death

lost slayer of decency
drugs replace our familys
caged in my insanty
untill the day i die


feel the sting
watch it bleed
tap the vayne
lost slayer of decency is me
to fast to think
strung out on crank
just cant sleep
in me you will find your end
see weak
see you crumble
brings me joy
seeing you in pain
hearing you scream
is how i feed on you

a part of you left behind
suffering so divine
lost with in a ****ing line
deeper and deeper you fall
now your all out of time
kiss your ****ing ass goodbye
one last twist of my ****ing nife
but no ones there to here your calls

slowly you fade away
seeing it on your ****ing face
such a dirty discrace
but that the price we pay



now you wonder endlessly
between a dream and reality
never ending tragidy
following you till the end of time

feel the sting
watch it bleed
tap the vayne
lost slayer of decency is me
to fast to think
strung out on crank
just cant sleep
in me you will find your end
see weak
see you crumble
brings me joy
seeing you in pain
hearing you scream
is how i feed on you

now im done with you
move on down the line
find another one
just like you
one more time
one more time

your a drummer OMG OMG OMG OMG












yea i try to write it sucks fu.cking ass

i like saying masturbate who like saying masturbate I DO its a funny word

loserib from judging from your lyrics I reckon you would make a good Black Metal vocalist.

what the hell?

sorry i have this thing for guitsrist and drummers

my friend and i wrote this he said it was sorta morbid so i bit him im so strange

Watching over my shoulder
fearing what following me
it just keeps getting colder
my legs are numb
and i cant see

bite into your skin
make you bleed
carry home
cut in you
barrel the blood
they bathe you in

time comes with wisdom
life comes with pain
wanting and needing
feel just the same

chorus

heres another loserib nothing but losers original its shorter then the other ones but when its got the music behind it
it hits hellsa****ing hard

HATE/LOVE

the lies we breed the hate it will last us for ever
the pain we share the love that keeps us together
what we have done can never be forgiving
all the way to the grave is where are secerets stay hiddin

all take and never no give
pushed to the piont where i have no will
a seceret we keep thats all to real
something that we can never tell
a lie we take all the way to hell
a debt that never can be paid
intertwined our paths our laid
by each other we been betrayed
till death we'er together we can never leave
with in a secreret that we both now
traped in a lie that cant be told
a painting of a picture that cant be shown
stuck in a torment tha we face alone

face alone

face alone

down to the mask that we both where
srouded in a lie that we both share
the cards we were delt were just not fair
dont ****ing lie cuese we were both there
death becomes a welcomed guest
just for a little escape from this
gone are the days of chiledhood bliss
a life i lost that i still miss
so we keep this to our selfs in a seceret we both vowed
wile taking part in the ultamet sin
i cant believe what we just did
to our kids

what we did

what we did

the lies we breed the hate it will last us for ever
the pain we share the love that keeps us together
what we have done can never be forgiving
all the way to the grave is where are secerets stay hiddin

Mine turned out being too depressing. I don't write rock lyrics anymore. happy tho'. doodeedoodeedoo. *skips off home*

what are you laghing at?

This is a "piratecore" song I wrote.

Blackheart's Lore

I looked out to the sea afar, just over the horizon.
A scary sight I saw, indeed. A black flag, it was flyin'.
I'd caught a glimpse of the depths of hell, it's been downhill ever since.
But it still brings a snicker, every time i reminisce.

That fateful day had started out much like all the rest
We drank and ate and drank again with nothing to protest
A ship sailed up and off they came, their leader in plain view
He said to me, 'Boy, don't you see, I really could use you.'
I need a man for my first mate, and you look like a nice young lad.
yes, you're just the type of person who could lead my scurvy band.
With that, my head was struck with lead and I fell onto the floor.
When I woke up the next morning I could barely see the door.
In walked the man who'd taken me from the haven I'd once known.
He told me I was on his ship, and my life he did own.

Oh, many a day was spent with him, and his trust was quickly earned.
We pillaged by day and dank at night, but for something more I yearned.
I concoted a scheme to take his life, for I wanted my own ship.
And it was only fair, 'cause he had taken my life, and brought me to this shit.
For months I planned, and when the time was right, I had to make my move.
I had all the women and money I could want, but I still had something to prove.
So one day we plundered a village, and a great bounty we did find
And at this moment, after very deep thought, I decided it was time.

The captain drank late into the night, and fell into deep rest
It was then I grabbed his sword from his sheath and plunged it into his chest.
When the morning came, I had donned his cloak, and that captain was no more.
Blackheart was here, to instigate fear in every part of the world.
The black sails that had scared me once have since become my friend.
And I will worship them, and all their glory, until my tragic end.
But my story will live on and on in hearts forevermore.
And I swear to you, it all is true, this thing called 'Blackheart's Lore.'

cool that sounds like a cross between Guns & Roses and Tenacious D

wow .. it does !

Weird...that's a very odd combination!

its a work in progres, so i hope you guys think its good, but there is no real chorus, but who needs them i say, just wack in a break down in the gaps!!

-------------------------------------------------------
Speedster

metallica said it best, cut your breakfast on a mirror,
i hope your not religious, cos boy your now a sinner,
adictive, preplexing, the want, neverending,
theiving, misleading, undying, you stop trying

see your face, staring up, shaking fingers, as you cut,
exspensive habit, you cant stop,
your gonna end up dead, as quick as if you were shot,
steal from an old man, those bags so easy to snatch,
do whatever you can, to get a little cash,

your car, something you dont need, sell your second kidney,
to buy a little speed,
inside your blood, is running devils seed,
thinning out your blood, eating away your brain,
nothing left to lose, but no more will to gain,
rehab dosn't matter, when you dont want to try,
your mother dosn't give up,
but you see desperation in her eye,

could it be the next line your snort,
or next needle you stick in, your red bloodshot eyes,
matches your perferated skin, you could die tommorow,
but of that your rather not think, so you do another line,
as your brain shrinks
-----------------------------------------------------

loserib, cool lyrics, you got talent!

I have wrote a lot of songs There are kinda like Metallica and Seether in there level of darkness

If I try and write songs, I'm going to be really careful about it.

Most bands seem content with writing whiny, pathetic diary-account crap (I saw you, you hate me, I cried etc).

Writing songs that sound even remotely similar to others is to me, incredibly redundant.

If I were to form a band, it'd most likely be with my brother, with me doing vocals and/or rhythm guitar. I'm not quite confident, or good enough to be a full on lead guitarist yet, and I have a friend who could come in handy for a lead guitar anyway.

I'd most likely write the songs. I have loads of subjects, but I'd definitely try and stray from most of the stuff out there. I'd try and write imagery, try and be poetic (I think I'm good at that), without being whiny, yet still tackle subjects such as depression.

I'd take a lot of inspiration from Curt Cobains writing I think, without plaigerising any material. It's tough, but I know I can do it.

I have wrote two songs they are pretty shity and make no sense to other people

I only read the first page of this thread, but from what I did read, loserib, your lyrics are awesome!


I've written tons of songs...I don't know if they're any good or not...I'll post some of them later. I don't have time right now.

i have but putting to paper what you invision in your head is hard.it never comes out right.

thanks to you both it really means alot we should have mp3s up by the end of next month it been taking a long time to get everything set up for recording

fuct_up_kid and tabby999 you guys got some good shiy working out there keep it up and dont quit no matter what anyone tells you

loserib whats the name of the band?

in order to get your band noticed you have to know someone in a high place. a friend of mine knows yellow card

the name of the band is Nothing but Losers
i know a few people nobody big my freinds band thr3efold is sponcerd by yagermiester
we are just planing on making so much noise everybody will have to take notice

loserib read your pms

i allready replied

woopsy..........i didn't write predictable.
just so ya know..i posted it in the wrong thread. sorry.

Sweet name, loserib

yeah, that's a cool name...at the moment my band is called the cool chihuahas

heres two more that im working on the first one is called
death romances and the second is your lies

Death Romances

Theres a woman in a black dress
Face pail white like a beautiful actress
For me she holds all the answers
Intoxicated by the way she dances
as you drift away
as you fade away
will you decide to stay
when she comes your way

in her arms theres no second chances
some she chooses and some she passes
eyes cut like knifes when she glances
in her beauty death romances
as you drift away
as you fade away
will you decide to stay
when she comes your way

taking all that she embraces
so many people and difrent places
disregarding all age and races
most come easy but few she chases
as you drift away
as you fade away
will you decide to stay
when she comes your way


Your Lies


i can see the truth in your eyes
when you ****ing lie to me
every time you open your mind
im surprised to see
something that i had missed
that weve been divided by
somthing i could not see in
your lies
your lies
your ****ing lies
i can feel the hate in your heart
that you've shown to me
you always try to tear me apart
with every word you say
no way i can hold back
the ****ing rage in me
no way i can ****ing take
your ****ing lies
your lies
your lies
your ****ing lies

*claps*

thank you Fearnix you are very kind

Brilliant, loserib I wish I could hear your songs instead of just reading the lyrics .... I'm sure they're awesome, though

hey loserib, dude ur lyrics rock!!! i hav recently joined a punk rock/metal band, i play bass guitar and sing.........but the prob is i cnt rite lyrics at all, i find it so hard!!! i woz wonderin if u cud giv me any tips?, how do u rite lyrics sooo good? i like wot u rite em about aswell, goverment n shit!!! if u cud giv me a few tips if possib i wud rely apreciate it!!! fanx

I don't really write rock lyrics. I write lyrics whenever I feel like I have something to write about. Since I can't sing I'll compose something on piano or keyboard that I think would compliment it.

-AC

murderous jim just write whats on your mind and look for insperation everywhere and i try to apraoch writing lyrics like peotry
its allways good to have a subject for each song

^ Agreed.


To add to loserib's tips, murderous jim, don't try to use gigantic words just to make everything look better or whatever...unless you know what they mean, of course haha. Like...don't just randomly look up huge words in the dictionary and somehow make them fit your song. Write what you know. And, like loserib said, writing is like poetry...for me, at least...So don't just write it down like you would a novel or whatever...Make it "flow," if you get my drift. Also, it doesn't have to rhyme any certain way. In fact, it doesn't even have to rhyme at all. Pick your own style of rhyming and go with it. Post some of your lyrics once you start writing them, ok?



By the by, I've written a few songs since the last time I posted...I'll try to post some later.

i've tried but I they're kinda pop rocky(my old ones anyway),i'd like to be in a band but I haven't learneed to play guitar yet and my singings pretty much crap.Plus,I don't know anybody here who needs people for a punk band.

Yeah...I write lyrics and I play guitar, but I'm not exactly a great singer And I'm determined to start a band soon, but no one I know can play anything or sing...It really sucks.

put up fleirs post on local music messageboards if you try hard enough you will find them a good place to find musicians at is shows

Good idea. Thanks, loserib.

Does writeing music for bass count cuz I have 1 book full my own stuff just looking for a drummer to start my band.

lyrics=words

...so no, writing music for anything doesn't count.

hey fanx 4 ur help guys! dese r sum i rot bout a werewolf but dey r reli crap so dnt laugh! it ent finished and shud be disgarded anyway lol!
i stare up at you in the dark cold night,
i cant turn my back like a moth to your light,
i do as you say yet i know its not right,
but ive got no choice youve destroyed my mind!

my skin tears and rips, my furr forces out,
my bones crack and break, i howl so loud,
my legs collapse, i fall to the ground,
gag blood from my mouth, im one big furry mound

I've tried writing lyrics before...its easier to do stuff for like funk rock, rather than like harder rock