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KK, me and my gf broke up on feb 16. We were dating for 4 months. i called her 2day, and asked her if we could still be friends. She was happy towards the idea, and said thats what she wanted. But i've neva been in this situation b4, with the whole 'Just friends" deal. I need some help ppl. Help a brotha out. ( I'm white, but i like talking black). lol.

Depending on how strong your feelings are for her, it'll be easier or harder to be "just friends".

-AC

If you think this will work imagine sitting the couch just you her and her new boyfriend still comfortable leave this whole situation behind you and you'll be happeir trust experience here.

Someone always gets hurt.

That's not true no2

Lordie.. if you read the thread about "worst thing you ever done".. I tried to be just friends with that girl.. all she did was take me shopping for her current boyfriend.. and then act like I was some moron slave.. making comments about him supposedly being "sexy" like I gave a damn.. she also told me how she hated how I talked about video games so much.. then wouldnt you know she thinks its cute how her current b/f talks so much about video games.. isnt that schweetumsz!!??.. .. however.. if your 'friend' isnt snotty like that.. it could work out..

Well me and my bf just broke up yeterday. We are suppose to be just friends, but i dont know what to tell you because im lost as well.

Just try to be nice, and if you still have feelings for her then it might be hard.

hmmmmm ya, well i still like her. But i understand thats it over. So i wont try and make a move. But she's still single.

If that's what she wanted, that means she needs some space. Today is February 22nd. If by March 8th you guys aren't back together, then move on.

In the meantime, ask her for a "date" this Friday night (today's Tuesday) where you pick her up and take her to dinner and then bring her home and that's it. Do not see or speak to her between the time you set the date and when you go on it. Trust me, it works b/c I've been in the situation before. You and her will actually look forward to the date in a whole new light and it won't be the "same old" times hanging out.

you may try, everything depends on personal issues

but for example one of my friends claim that there is no such a think like friendship between guy and girl.

Girls that try to make guys suffer by trying to "still be friends" right after breaking up deserve to be kicked in the face by golf cleats.

What you do is avoid her at all costs, a "friend" relationship after an actual relationship is going to cause you nothing but pain and trouble.

If you're really interested in being friends with her in the long run.....then just walk away from her. This works best if you go to the same school or work together. After a couple of weeks or months (however long it takes for you to completely get over her) when you "run into" eachother things won't be as awkward as when you tried to force the friendship when what you really wanted was the relationship to never end.

Sats situation is a fairly common one.

Being a woman's plutonic friend is like being a penis in a jar. "break incase of emergency"

Link is correct. I tried to force friendship (we did both want it) and it got me nowhere by Awkwardville USA.

Luckily I rectified the problem and we stopped talking for a while. Now things are ok.

-AC

YOU STOLE MY AVATAR...!!!!

ARGH...

I believe both of you need more time.. Just take your time, and when the time is right, blurp your heart out...

In my experience you can only be friends with a girl if there are no sexual/romantic feelings there otherwise it just leads to more heartache, a lot of people say the lets still be friends line but they rarely mean it

well said smoker4

I think the whole "lets still be friends" line is used when a relationship just doesn't "work out."

Neither person did something heinous to get dumped by the other...but the feelings that were once there are now gone.

Personally, I think the whole "lets be friends" line is used by people who don't want the animosity that some break ups carry around aftwards. Most times they don't want to be close friends...they just don't want to be enemies.

To abondon someone you greatly love is like abondoning your family members...

Thanks finti, lets be friends

just act normally around her.
the only difference now is that you two arent snogging or shagging anymore.

I disagree you are talking about different types of love, when it comes to family thats uncondictional love its a two way street most of the time. Its not the same as romantic love

That's not true. I think if you care about the person deep down still. Then you really don't want to lose them as friend, as well as bf/or gf.


It means they want you still a part of your life, but not sure how to make it possible.

But still, a feeling that was once there, will be there again, somehow.
I strongly object the "lets still be friends" thing...
I don't believe it, and I won't...

Yes but what i meant is that if you have a mother you will always love your mom and she will always love you but with a partner there is no guarantee

They may still want to be in your life as a friend but all im saying is its a hard thing to change the dynamics of a relationship unfortunatly

Bonds that are broken can be mend again. By choosing not to mend, is like abondoning that bond... That bond can only be found in friends, compatitors, your own personal idols, family members, and your love ones. That bond, can be defined by love/respect.

In a kind of way, I say that abondoning your love ones is like abondoning your family members, because family members are first-third most important thing in most everyday people's life..

I don't even know if this whole thing makes sense...

If I were to ever choose, I won't abondon my partner anyhow.. that is for certain...

Man, some good points here. I dont know if i did the right thing, by asking her to still be friends. O well, i'll find out sooner or later, what comes of this.

Yeah, keep us posted. If getting back with her doesn't work out, go for her sister.

Been there lol

lol, nah she has no sister. Plus i cant think of any other girl right now, only her. But if we can still just hang out n shit, i wont make any moves on her. I know it;s over. But i cant stop thinking about her. So i gotts to be friends with her.

That's sad.

You can't stop thinking about her, so instead of going out to find someone to make you stop thinking about her....you're going to hang onto friendship that will almost certainly be a mediocre friendship at best.

And what happens when you two are buddies and she decides its time for another boyfriend? Do you think you are really going to be that everyday buddy when she has a new boyfriend? Do you think it will be any easier forgetting about her after hanging onto her for so long?

Seriously, if the relationship isn't multi-year long, and neither of you have moved in together.....then just move on. It hurts now, but you're saving yourself A LOT of trouble in the long run.

trust link to look on the bright side

but he's right...

unless you've been together at least a year or so then there's really no point...

just tell her you want her back or else give it up...

No.

no what?

No to the original question. Don't be friends with your ex girlfriends.

oh...

and yes, i agree...

I believe in staying friends if it doesn't work out.

Do good times outweigh the bad?

This one chick I knew broke my heart after a week. She still wanted to be friends but she never established a credibility with me. All she did was f*** me over. So in that case, I wouldn't stay friends.

ya, well i'm not going to be hanging around with her everyday. Prolly only talk with her, once or twice every couple of weeks. And when we do go out, it wud be with otha friends. I still like her... yes. But i know it's over, but i still want to be in contact with her.