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Human Darth Vader(when he's at his most powerful) vs. Jesus.
Since Anakin is the jesus who went evil and got more powerful, do you think Jesus could battle him and win?

no comment

Vader would crucify him

Originally posted by SnakeEyes
no comment

Who is Jesus? Is he EU character? =O

Jesus would own Vader. Vader can't control his emotions. And, since I feel like being one of the Vader cultists that so frequent this place... here goes...

Jesus would win, cuz, like, he's the chosen one. The messiah. He has more ******* in his blood, thus making him stronger with the Lord and thus he would totally whup ass. (Yes, I used Jesus and whup ass in the same sentence, actually twice. Sue me.) And Jesus would be a better swordsman than anyone else ever made of all time because he is the One and has those thingies in his blood, even if he's never swung a blade before in his life. And Jesus would know more about lore than anyone who had ever lived because he was born in a time when the light side was at its shining moment, blah blah blah... cuz I don't pay attention to messiahs and saints before or after this point. Jesus rules!

Man, isn't that just annoying to hear? Now imagine that posted on every versus thread. Wow... Truly vexing.

But seriously, I think Jesus would win because he's not the violent type. And moral purity beats violent passion every time.

I have no other comment other than this: LMFAO Janus.....

Blinkety Blink

Vader draws his lightsaber, standing there heavily breathing he clicks the trigger igniting the blade. jesus stands a mear five feet away from him standing there calmly, "If you strike me down you will only hurt yourself, "His calm voice pierces through the air.
"I will not listen to your nonsense, "Vader shouts.
he lunges foward swinging the red beam of his lightsaber directly through Jesus.
Jesus dissapears, and his garments drop to the floor.

About twenty years later, Vader dies and he gos to hell.


JESUS WINS

Amen, brutha. Preach on!

*Gets out his lightsaber cross. Basically, it's two twin-bladed sabres taped together. Starts whuppin' ass.*

Darth Vader is beyond amazing....but JEsus? come on. no contest, the bearded savior wins against anyone. He would build a table and break it over Vader's head, then laugh and smite him into hell.

Darth Vader. Jesus would freaking die for Vader to "wash away his sins".

Vader skewers him with his saber.
"Idiot".

Someone's got a skewed view on religion...

Well, I guess Vader could kill him, but then he would be a Jedi Knight Light and then he would laugh at Vader who has no penis.

I think Jesus make Vader to the light side easily blessing him.

this is stupid and ridiculous. I cant believe im saying this. Sorry, Jesus, but Darth Vader chokes him to death.

Jesus would call to his father in the heavens to strike down vader where he stands

Ah, hate to put this out there, but if the Force and Jesus existed in the same reality, wouldn't it be logical to think the son of God could block a force choke? Yeah, that's what I thought.

Originally posted by DarkMenace
Vader chokes him to death.


So what? After 3 days he would be back standing at Vaders doorstep.

With a vengeance.

Jesus: Force choke me, mutha... You goin' to hell, yeah...

(Yes, Jesus is black.)

Actually Jesus was coloured not white...

And if i have to take this question seriously i would have to Jesus, at least the christian definition of Jesus. The muslim definition would be dead quickly.. The christian however, would like said before probably be able to block any force attack of Vader. A lightsaber attack might kill him but he'd just return and finish the job while Vader was sleeping..

While either that, or just blind him... What? If he can make blind people see he can probably make normal people blind

two words vader wins

Of better yet, Jesus heals Vader's wounds both in his soul and on his body. A passive yet monumental victory.

Bet none of you thought of that.

Yeah i did, but what would be the fun of a fight like that?

Anakin would beat vader no problem, more than anything because he has a lot more midichlorians then vader and if luke could beat vader anakin could beat vader

And what does that have to do with Jesus?

That person's brain associated Anakin with God. It's spreading. Time for containment.

Anakin is god? Damn... That woudl explain a lot of what has happened in the world in the last 5000+ years

Yeah. No wonder Moses was wondering the desert for forty years.

"I hate sand. It's harsh and rough. And it all looks the same. Good luck with directions, Moses."

Originally posted by Darth_Janus
Yeah. No wonder Moses was wondering the desert for forty years.

"I hate sand. It's harsh and rough. And it all looks the same. Good luck with directions, Moses."



That really made me laugh out loud

Me too. lol... Good humor is a neccessity here.

lol
that was funnay

jesus owns vader,he culd talk him out of a fight,kinda like revan only religious version

Revan's God too? Who knew Star Wars was a polytheistic universe?

Revan is like Allah... Basicly the same thing only from a different perspective

So is Malachor or Korriban Mecca/

Coruscant is probably like Jerusalem... Holy to all...

Malachor and Korriban are like Rome and Mecca... Don't know which is what though...

Wow, this thread was just me folling around wasted one night, and look at the glory now

Bad things happen when you talk about stupid stuff with stupid people

Okay....

You guys need Jesus...

Yeah I do, he owes me 5 bucks

Originally posted by Darth Mantis
You guys need Jesus...

But where will we find him? Malachor? Coruscant? Korriban? Its so confusing

you'll find him standing over vader's dead body peeing.

You'd think he'd take the time to find a toilet

no he'd be pissin on vaders head after he whipped that as$

Originally posted by Fishy
But where will we find him? Malachor? Coruscant? Korriban? Its so confusing Taris... Oh wait that blew up...
blowup

we'll find him on malachor ,janus i think revan is more like buddha

Here:

Vader rushes at Jesus, God cuts off his dick and sends t ohell ewith millions of beautiful women, but guess what, God also cut off his figures and his lips so he can't do anything to these beautiful women. Then Jesus pops open a Holy Soda and drinks it.

Whoa, whoa personal foul... ten yards...

****ing retared creating this thread

lol

kiu dun= genius

but this thread has brought so much joy to our internet lives

No, no it hasn't *starts to cry*

and btw Jesus is tokin up with Yoda

God did say partaketh of all herbs or something like that didnt he?..smoke

This thread is so fitting.

jesus is cannon fodder!

Where would vader get a freaking Cannon??? Seriously. And why use such a primitive weapon?

it's just a phrase man

Jesus can't lose, man. He and Parker Lewis are brothers. (I know, half of you will smirk and the rest will scratch your heads over that line)

currently scratching head . . .

Originally posted by exanda kane
it's just a phrase man

You can't use that in this thread man, this thread is very very serious... Using phrases is like saying Jesus lives on Korriban... WHEN WE IN REALITY HAVE NO IDEA WHERE HE LIVES

Jesus was black and a jew and that is the truth. Vader was black and a Sith, that is a fact.

Jesus wasn't black.... He wasn't white either, but he wasn't black...

Jesus was brown if anything, most of the jews who lived in that area, in that time had brown skin.

Jesus is holy, but I wouldn't go so far as to say he has soul.

lmao

Originally posted by Darth_Nefarus
Jesus was brown if anything, most of the jews who lived in that area, in that time had brown skin.

He had the same skin colours Muslims have...

could be a muslim as well as a jew . . . what about the christian thing

Christianity didn't exist until technically, Christ's diciples began to spread his word. He was, in life, a Jew.

my point exactly, but jesus was walking along Jeruselam high street selling opium, when some guy come up to him and says he's the son of god

allah