~50 Things To Do At Walmart~

Text-only Version: Click HERE to see this thread with all of the graphics, features, and links.



Morbid4Daniel
If you're a prankster and you visit Wal-Mart often, check out this page and prepare to laugh. My favorite is #11.

SlipknoT
Already a thread on this

LanİeWindu™
WHERE'S THE LINK???

BTW, I've already seen one of those...my favorite is leave a trail of orange juice all the way to the bathroom door.

Captain REX
Have sex in the shoe section...it's exciting. stick out tongue

Morbid4Daniel

Jackie Malfoy
There should be a thread saying Fifty things not to do at walmart.JM laughing

Morbid4Daniel
Oh god. Make it lol

IceWithin
seriously though, where's the link wacko

Morbid4Daniel
http://www.funny.co.uk/stuff/art_173-1448-50-Fun-Things-to-do-at-Walmart.html

IceWithin
laughing

I love number 6 and 9

Jackie Malfoy
Originally posted by Morbid4Daniel
Oh god. Make it lol

I am not in the mood right now.JM wink

Morbid4Daniel
Yea #9 is my second fave stick out tongue

IceWithin
omfg this is tooo ****ing funny, Im peein my pants laughing at this!!

Jackie Malfoy
Originally posted by IceWithin
omfg this is tooo ****ing funny, Im peein my pants laughing at this!!

(Moves back alittle from Ice)jm laughing

Morbid4Daniel
stick out tongue

ILoveMyDaniel
1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them
and stranding them at strategic locations.

2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.

3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten-minute intervals
throughout the day.

4. Don't bother doing your own shopping. Simply find someone with a full trolley containing roughly the items you need, and when they are not looking take it and go pay for it at the checkout. (this is not stealing, they did not own the items yet, they were simply 'moving them around')

5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the
spray air fresheners.

6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift-wrap.

7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.

8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit, then arrange them into erotic poses. (be creative with the gift-wrap tubes used in point 6).

9. When there are people behind you, walk really slowly,
especially in thin aisles.

10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I
think we've got a code 3 in housewares," and see what happens.

11. Turn all the radios to polka stations; then turn them off
and turn the volume up to full blast.

12. Re-enact a fatal incident involving the automatic doors.

13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi. I haven't seen
you in so long." etc. See if they play along. Insist on calling them 'Bob', and if they protest, get angry about it (violent if necissary).

14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself
loud enough for all to hear, "Who buys this crap anyway?!"

15. When you leave the store, try your car keys in the door of every car in the car park until you get to your own. Then drive off as if this is perfectly normal. (Note- if you don't actually own a car and walked to the store, attempt the above by substituting car keys with your house keys).

16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you are
taking it for a test drive.

17. Follow people through the aisles, staying about 5 feet
behind them. Do this until they leave the store.

18. Ask if you can test some super-glue before buying it, then walk around the store gluing random items to other items/customers/staff. For added fun: See how many cashiers you can glue to each-other before any of them notice.

19. As the cashier runs your purchase over the scanner say "BEEP" in a loud voice. Repeat this for every item, and for other customers items. If the cashier protests, kill them.


20. Take off your shoes and tell them you want to return it and
when they say you didn't buy it there say "The customer is always right dammit!!" Make a scene.

21. Move "Caution : Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.

22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you
will only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.

23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can catch from other
aisles.

24. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying,
"I'm Batman. Come Robin, to the Batcave."

26. Climb things.

27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.

28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello"
upside down. Once you have mastered this, progress to "boobs".

29. When someone asks you if you need help, begin to cry and
say, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"

30. When 2 or 3 people are walking ahead of you, run between
them yelling "Red Rover."

31. Make up nonsense products and ask employees if there are any
in stock. (i.e.: Shnerples). Do a vague hand-mime of what a 'Shnerple' looks like to assist them.

32. Take up an entire aisle in toys by setting up a full-scale
battle with G.I. Joe vs. X-men.

33. Take bets on the battle from above.

34. Test the brushes and combs in Cosmetics on all the live animals in Pet-Care.

35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask
the clerk where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as
possible.

36. Hold indoor shopping cart races.

37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from
Mission Impossible.

38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.

39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags against their will.

40. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to
your Twinkies."

41. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.

42. Two words: Marco Polo.

43. Leave Cheerios in lawn and garden, pillows in the pet
section, etc.

44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's using an alternative alphabet of your choosing.

45. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look with
various funnels.

46. When someone steps away from his or her cart to look at
something, quickly place random combinations of items in their cart, such as 'A Large Cucumber and a Tub of Vasceline'.

47. Relax in the patio furniture drinking beer until you get kicked out.

48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, drop to
your knees and scream, "No, no, its those voices again."

49. Pay off layaways 50 cents at a time.

50. Drag a lounge chair over to the magazines and relax. Go to
the food court, buy a drink, and explain that you don't get out
much and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.

cking
Here are ten reasons to piss of an associate in produce 1. first go up the celery in produce and act like you are looking around and ask the produce associate where the celery is. this will annoy them pretty badly.

2. go within 10 feet of any associate and if they don't ask what you want and if they ignore you then tell that person out loud that you disobeyed SAM Walton's number one rule and that is greeting a customer within 10 feet. this will scare the associate and the manager may come and chew that person out.

3. go and drop some produce on the ground and go tell the associate to clean it up and after they are done wait five more minutes and drop different produce on the ground in another place and do the same as in another place this might cause the associate not to come back after three attempts.

4. go and ask the associate some questions that has nothing to do with produce like where is the milk? then get serious with the associate and tell them why isn't this product is not in produce? why do I have to go across the the store to find this when it should be in produce? this will confuse the associate and will point fingers in every direction not knowing what or where this product is.

5.go get in those motorized carts and go slow as you can in produce and start bumping into things. go up to the associate and ask in a weary whisper while your head is down what you want. if they ask you to repeat the question then tell are you deaf or something!! I said go get those potatoes that I can't reach!! why is this a hard question? the associate will be little red in the face and might throw you the potato while instead of handing it to you.

I can't think of the other five and I will think of them later but I know produce associates are utterly useless in these situations.

Barker
#51: Actually buy stuff. no expression

Xavius
Hehehe!

natashia
at one time wallmart sold barbies with wallmart shopping baggs. my friend and i went into wallmart and there proceeded to have a discussion of wether or not barbie should shop at wallmart or not. i was in favor and she wasn't. Becomming obstinate at my many good reasons why barbie shopps at wallmart my friend proceedes to turn aaaaaaaaallllllllllllllllll of the wallmart barbies backwards so one would not be able to see them while walking down the isle. (needless to say her daughter who was with us (my friend was around her 40's at the time i was 18) left saying that we were embarassing her). i was turning them back but i was no match for her detirmination to see the deed done so i gave up. When done with barbie we come across the theresa wallmart barbie and i ask if she is going to do the same thing to her. she replied that theresa wasn't as cool or rich as barbie so she was allowed to shop at wallmart. needless to say i laughed my ass off so loud and hard that i hurt for the next couple of days. it was so funny. so there is something else one can do at wallmart.

Rick/Genis
My favorite is how the Lords of Smizasch came in and created Walmart to monopalize the entire earth!!!

Psyquis52
Poop in the diaper section.

Psyquis52
Originally posted by Rick/Genis
My favorite is how the Lords of Smizasch came in and created Walmart to monopalize the entire earth!!! This is also true.

natashia
open all of the toys

Psyquis52
Originally posted by natashia
open all of the toys Then poop on them.

Rick/Genis
Then eat them! In that order!

Psyquis52
Poop on the manager.

Rick/Genis
Then eat him! What are we talking about again?

Psyquis52
Originally posted by Rick/Genis
Then eat him! What are we talking about again? My diet habits.

ILoveMyDaniel
Originally posted by cking
Here are ten reasons to piss of an associate in produce 1. first go up the celery in produce and act like you are looking around and ask the produce associate where the celery is. this will annoy them pretty badly.

2. go within 10 feet of any associate and if they don't ask what you want and if they ignore you then tell that person out loud that you disobeyed SAM Walton's number one rule and that is greeting a customer within 10 feet. this will scare the associate and the manager may come and chew that person out.

3. go and drop some produce on the ground and go tell the associate to clean it up and after they are done wait five more minutes and drop different produce on the ground in another place and do the same as in another place this might cause the associate not to come back after three attempts.

4. go and ask the associate some questions that has nothing to do with produce like where is the milk? then get serious with the associate and tell them why isn't this product is not in produce? why do I have to go across the the store to find this when it should be in produce? this will confuse the associate and will point fingers in every direction not knowing what or where this product is.

5.go get in those motorized carts and go slow as you can in produce and start bumping into things. go up to the associate and ask in a weary whisper while your head is down what you want. if they ask you to repeat the question then tell are you deaf or something!! I said go get those potatoes that I can't reach!! why is this a hard question? the associate will be little red in the face and might throw you the potato while instead of handing it to you.

I can't think of the other five and I will think of them later but I know produce associates are utterly useless in these situations.
laughing out loud I love #1.

Bloigen
I'm going to do all of them no expression

ILoveMyDaniel
Originally posted by Bloigen
I'm going to do all of them no expression
Yeah, let's see you do that. Film it all.

Bloigen
Originally posted by ILoveMyDaniel
Yeah, let's see you do that. Film it all.

Then I'll finally have something to upload on to YouTube. eek!

ILoveMyDaniel
Originally posted by Bloigen
Then I'll finally have something to upload on to YouTube. eek!
Why don't you already?

Bloigen
http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c373/hotsauce6548/kermit5bunny.gif

ILoveMyDaniel
laughing out loud

redcaped
Spend the night only if they get more toys...24 hours service just like KMC///cool

ILoveMyDaniel
We have a subway,a pretzel place, a hair salon, and a manicure/pedicure place in our Wal-Mart.

Genesis-Soldier
37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from
Mission Impossible.



i love this

Text-only Version: Click HERE to see this thread with all of the graphics, features, and links.