Bond vs Kirk (seduction powers) Both have been in comics so it should be ok :D

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whirlysplat
Bond vs Kirk (seduction powers) Both have been in comics so it should be ok big grin



There is a room. In the room is a pretty girl.

In one corner of the room is James Bond, agent for MI6 and famous womaniser.

In the other corner is James T Kirk, Federation captain and famous womaniser.

Only one of them can leave the room, and that will be the one who can first seduce the girl into bed.

There are no guns, no special gadgets, no ripped shirts. Violence may not be used, only powers of seduction.

Who gets the girl and wins?

Keep the faithbig grin

Keep it original rock

mr.smiley
I realy don't like James Bond,but I would say he wins.

By the way,which Bond are we talking about?

ZephroCarnelian
I'm afraid it'd be Bond.

He has The Gift.

I think women fall over Kirk just cos he's got a big.... starship.

Whereas Bond is simply the man.

One vodka martini later and it's Bond having rumpy pumpy and Kirk in the cold sonic showers back on the Enterprise.

mr.smiley
If this was to take place on the Enterprise,Kirk could win,but that's the only way.

whirlysplat
My take is A menage-a-trois ensues.

Any Bond you want Mr Smiley big grin

How could bond beat this

ZephroCarnelian
With a laser watch.

Kirk always fell into traps lol.

whirlysplat
Originally posted by ZephroCarnelian
With a laser watch.

Kirk always fell into traps lol.

So did bond, see:

ZephroCarnelian
Ah!

But Bond has smart villains.

Kirk was always lured by deadly robots disguised as women and/or elderly townsfolk, lol.

Remember the episode with the monster which could change shape and absorbed salt from people? Even though he knew it was a nevil creature from hell, he still nearly kissed the bloody thing lol!

He doesn't come form the Picard school of keeping a straight head lol.

whirlysplat
I remeber that episode well on the Kirk v Picard bit

look at this

Kirk vs. Picard
100 Reasons Why Kirk Is Better Than Picard
1.Kirk is a leader, not a follower.
2.Kirk never really got into that kinky "Jumpsuit" look.
3.Kirk has sex more than once a season.
4.One word: Hair.
5.Another word: Pretty-good-looking-can't-see-the-weave-wig.
6.Kirk can beat up a Klingon bare-handed.
7.Picard is a Frenchman with an English accent.
8.Kirk would date Beverly Crusher -- and damn the consequences !!
9.Kirk never drinks tea. Ever.
10.Diplomacy for Kirk is a phaser and a smile.
11.Kirk would personally throw Wesley off his bridge.
12.Two words: Shoulder roll.
13.Kirk doesn't wear dresses when Admirals arrive for lunch.
14.Kirk once said: "I've got a belly-ache -- and it's a beauty".
15.Kirk would never sing to children in a crisis.
16.Kirk can almost drive a stick-shift.
17.Kirk, almost single-handedly, re-populated the Earth's whale population.
18.Kirk says, "Prime Directive? What Prime Directive?"
19.Kirk knows 20th Century curses.
20.Kirk was never infiltrated by the Borg and used against the Federation.
21.Kirk ate little coloured cubes and still remained relatively healthy.
22.Kirk made do with obviously low performance technology.
23.Kirk never pretends to be a barber in order to gain a tactical advantage.
24.Kirk wasn't shy about taking his shirt off -- even around those pesky Yeomans.
25.Kirk would never waste a holodeck on something as stupid as Dixon Hill.
26.Kirk never once stood up and had to straighten his shirt.
27.One word: Velour.
28.Kirk can beat a Vulcan at Chess.
29.When Kirk was Picard's age, he retired from Admiral and took to climbing rocks.
30.When Picard was 37, he was only Captain of the lowly freighter, Stargazer. When Kirk was 37, he was Captain of the flagship Enterprise.
31.Kirk liked a good belt of liquor every now and again.
32.One word: Iman.
33.Kirk looks good with a ripped shirt.
34.If Kirk ever met a Ferengi, he would rip off its head and shit down its neck.
35.Kirk says: "Shoot first and wait for retaliation".
36.Kirk's first officer never tells him to stay on the bridge.
37.Kirk never leaves the room to bawl somebody out.
38.Kirk doesn't rely on the wisdom of some dumb old janitor to get him out of intergalactic scrapes.
39.Two words: Funky sideburns.
40.Kirk never asks his bartender for advice.
41.Kirk never once said: "Abandon ship! All hands abandon ship!".
42.Kirk is not politically correct.
43.Kirk never got dumped by a woman for an intergalactic busybody named after a letter of the alphabet.
44.Kirk never once wore green tights and frolicked about in Sherwood Forest.
45.If there was ever a Klingon on Kirk's bridge, Kirk would likely be dead.
46.Ever heard of a bar shooter called "Make it so?" No? How about a "Beam me up Scotty" then? See the difference?
47.One word: Miniskirts.
48.Kirk's girlfriends always look good in soft light.
49.Kirk never went anywhere without a whole bunch of guys in red shirts.
50.Kirk's first officer didn't play some wimpy instrument like the trombone.
51.Kirk had more dates than his first officer.
52.The extent of Kirk's knowledge of Klingon vocabulary can be roughly translated as "Go F**k Yourself."
53.If something doesn't speak English -- it's toast.
54.Kirk wasn't some prissy archaeology fan.
55.Picard's middle name isn't tough or awe-inspiring like Tiberius is.
56.If Kirk finds a strange spinning probe, he blows it up.
57.Picard never met Joan Collins.
58.Picard flunked his entrance exams to Starfleet.
59.Picard hasn't fathered any children; Kirk -- probably millions.
60.Kirk has a cool phaser -- not some pansy Braun mix-master.
61.Two words: Line delivery.
62.Picard grew up on a quaint little French vineyard, squishing grapes with his toes, while Kirk slung bails of wheat and hay in Iowa to put himself through school.
63.Kirk emphasizes his orations with pertinent hand gestures.
64.Kirk once made a cannon out of bamboo, sulfur, potassium nitrate, charcoal and then fired diamonds into the hearts of his enemies (Need we say more?).
65.Kirk is not put off by green skin.
66.Kirk knows how to deal with peace loving hippie goofs.
67.Kirk once fought a Greek god. And won.
68.Kirk barely asks for suggestions. And if he does, he asks Spock only.
69.Kirk doesn't let the doctor tell him what to do.
70.One word: Fisticuffs.
71.Kirk's name is hated throughout the galaxy.
72.Kirk appreciates Shakespeare, but he doesn't let it show.
73.You can never lock Kirk up for very long.
74.Kirk's eulogies can actually make you cry.
75.Kirk plays god with lesser cultures, and then exploits them for resources.
76.Kirk's son would never drop out to become a musician.
77.Kirk can climb up a Jeffries Tube and fix anything.
78.Kirk never hired an engineer with punk glasses.
79.The Klingons didn't have a word for surrender -- until they met Kirk.
80.Kirk's bridge is not beige.
81.Two words: Crane shots.
82.Picard likes wimpy violin music -- and coerces Data into playing it.
83.Picard allows cats on board, while Kirk beams away even really cute things like Tribbles.
84.Kirk is a cultural icon - Picard is just some guy who's really nice.
85.Kirk specifically ordered a swivel LA-Z-BOY for the bridge.
86.Kirk would never touch Synthahol.
87.Kirk looks distinguished in reading glasses -- and nobody dares to call him "four eyes".
88.Kirk can infiltrate Gangsters, Nazis and even the Pentagon - easily.
89.Picard likes painting nudes, for art's sake.
90.When Kirk doesn't trust the Romulans, he fires at them. When Picard doesn't trust the Romulans, he gets fired at.
91.Kirk never once, ever, wore a wiener wrapping Speedo banana hammock on shore leave.
92.Kirk never gets his command codes locked out by some pimply acting ensign.
93.Kirk doesn't test the engines -- he just fires them up.
94.When Kirk says "Boldly Go," he means it.
95.Three words: Flying leg kick.
96.Picard's crew would never ever think of him as a sexual object.
97.Kirk traveled through The Great Barrier, met God, and wasn't even impressed.
98.Kirk's bedroom is a passion pit with electric sheets.
99.Kirk would never let his Chief of Security wear A ponytail.
100.One word: Balls.

whirlysplat
Originally posted by ZephroCarnelian
Ah!

But Bond has smart villains.

Kirk was always lured by deadly robots disguised as women and/or elderly townsfolk, lol.

Remember the episode with the monster which could change shape and absorbed salt from people? Even though he knew it was a nevil creature from hell, he still nearly kissed the bloody thing lol!

He doesn't come form the Picard school of keeping a straight head lol.

Smart Villains confused uh........

ZephroCarnelian
lol!

And I know you got that list off tinternet!

What self respecting Brit says 'stick-shift?' wink

But yeah - Kirk is far better than Picard.

whirlysplat
I certainly did big grin

but this is the clincher

1968 - The first interracial kiss on TV took place on this day between Captain James T. Kirk (William Shatner) and Lieutenant Uhura (Nichelle Nichols) during the Plato's Stepchildren episode of Star Trek.

whirlysplat
Originally posted by whirlysplat
I certainly did big grin

but this is the clincher

1968 - The first interracial kiss on TV took place on this day between Captain James T. Kirk (William Shatner) and Lieutenant Uhura (Nichelle Nichols) during the Plato's Stepchildren episode of Star Trek. (cool stuff)

A god among men

ZephroCarnelian
Awesome. smile

Anyway - my fiance's falling asleep lol.

Lambrini two glasses of Lambrini and she's zonked out lol!

I'm off to bed now, I'll see you all tomorrow some time!

Nanight!

whirlysplat
Originally posted by ZephroCarnelian
Awesome. smile

Anyway - my fiance's falling asleep lol.

Lambrini two glasses of Lambrini and she's zonked out lol!

I'm off to bed now, I'll see you all tomorrow some time!

Nanight!

tata mate big grin

whirlysplat
or maybe Bond's & Kirk's powers of seduction cancel each other when they converge on the girl. So, the girl stands on the sidelines while Kirk & Bond seduce each other.

Bishop X
God Uhura was sexy.

whirlysplat
bump

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