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I basically just had a heart attack. I was standing at the sink doing dishes when a dish that my sister had on the stove exploded. It was glass too. I almost had many shards of glass imbeded in my skin.

Hmm... that sucks, Lance.

but you didn't get hurt?

so what do we learn here? don't do the dishes

"My heart goes
boom bange bang
boom bange bang
boom all the time"

If you cant take the heat, stay out of the kitchen!

glad to hear you're ok L.W.--- may need storm trooper armor when doing killer dishes--

Okay, not to change the subject, but;

Last night I logged in from my buddies place WASTED!!!!!! I remember posting once, but I didn't after that, because I was too drunk to type. I couldn't remeber what I posted, or where I posted it.

What I said earlier in the thread, was what I typed in my enebriated state.

Hmmmm seems perfectly legible to me To, are you drunk right now too?

yeah, you're really drunk

Who me?

I'm only on my 3rd can!

No I'm not drunk now.

But I was then. I do remember it took me a long time to type that. That's why I logged off afterwards.

yeah To, you're not the smartest of us

I'm getting a little tipsy now come to think of it, haven't eaten since this morning.

*yells*
drink! drink! drink!

I don't need encouragement Yerss, I can act like an arse all by myself.

Mech's a seasoned drinker, I can tell.

We can smell our own kind.

everyone can smell your kind To

I walked right into that one.

Oh yes.

Just gonna go get another can, want one To?

finally he will taste some good beer... I hope

Well, I am still hungover. . . .

What the hell. Pass one here, mech.

Its Carling Black Label, which is pretty nice.

Here you go To, enjoy.

*CRACK!!! glug, glug, glug*

Mm, tasty!

I must be drunk, I'm enjoying cyber alcohol with someone I've never really met.

*Mrs.MM shouts - "Get a life David"*

Hey, us drinkers need to stick together.

Tell Mrs. MM to pipe down and grab a drink herself.

no, tell her to come online again; long time ago

I'll be sure to pass on the good advice. Less chat, more drinking though methinks.

I drink too much.

Oh well. *gulp, gulp*

Man I'm hungry now.

I could eat a scabby dog the size of a horse.

I'm hungry too. Boy, mech. You're ontop of things today.

as long as he stay on top of things and not persons, I don't care

Don't go eating too much though To, it'll dampen the effects of the beer. You know what mech says when there's drinking to be done?

"You're a cheat - if you eat"

Quite simple, but an essential rule.

That's awesome! I'm gonna use that!

Feel free.

I get so pissed at my friends sometimes. We're going to get drunk, so we buy a bunch of booze. Then they eat food until they are full. Then they don't want to drink.

Food always ruins a good piss-up.

True that.

I like to scarf down food right before I go to bed. Then I sleep like a baby.

I love being drunk-hungry.

I can't remember the amount of times I've got wrecked and then bought stupid amounts of food to take home. Usually I'll get home and pass out before I eat a thing I've bought!

Nothing compares to a warmed up kebab the next morning to cure your hangover.

What's that?

Kebabs are pitta breads stuffed with lamb or chicken and salad, along with lots of chilli and lemon. Pure drunk food, nobody in there right mind eats those things sober.

Sounds pretty funky.

I'll stick to pizza.

Also nice the morning after.

I havn't eaten anything yet today.

I got up and was drinking water, then I saw you were drinking. So what the hell?

I probably should eat something, but screw it. I'll just drink. It's Saturday, after all.

I'm gonna have to log off in a minute, Mrs.MM has just asked me to come downstairs to drink with her and she's looking sultry. Meeeeeeow!

ok, log off, and don't tell us the result!

NIIIIICCEEEEEEEE!!!!!

Mech's gonna get some! Lucky bastard!

Oh I'll log off, but the rest I'll be keeping to myself.

thank the waffle!

WHAT ARE YOU STILL POSTING FOR?!?!?!?!

Go! Go! GO!!!!!

Good luck. Be careful. We don't want any little MM's running around.

well if they became Birmingham or wolves fans it would be kind of cool

More soccer talk, eh?

soccer? soccer?? it's football!

Don't want no dingles!

It's stupid that American football is called football. It really has nothing to do with your foot.

well you use your feet when you run with the ball, kick field goals

No but I almost had. The glass went behind be in from of me and to my left side. Just inches from shooting right into me.

Oh, that's right. This thread was about your accident.

I thought we were talking about that glass that exploded instead of his birth?

You bastard!!!

Yes it's a topic about Lance shitting his pants!

Ha ha. You like that, Mr. Poopy Pants?

Hey I did not shit my pants!

All I did was pee a little.

j/k.

I just jumped so high I almost hit my head on the ceiling.

Ah you see there is no danger of me ever hitting my head on the ceiling!

why, are you really short?

Probably.

She should be named Strawberry Shortcake

You shouldn't mention food, she'll probably puke again.

Eleanor Shortliff was a popular one at school.

was? passed on?

Oh come on, guys, keep up! She's talking about her nickname!

But that said, I guess she was too ill to remember that virtually no-one knows her surname.

I thought Eleanor is her name

(Bangs head against wall)

I said no-one knows her SURNAME, Keo.

Ush, if you want a head-ache, I can give you a hamer...

what about herself and her parents? do they know her surname?

Oh, my sides may just split with laughter...

then we have to stop them! Quick! Some tape!