Don't read?
One suggestion: Don't group together paragraphs like this. Make them seperate entities by spacing between them, such as:
Sally went to the mall. While there, she was attacked by a little green alien. "What do you want?" Sally asked sweetly. "Your blood," answered the alien. Later on in the day, Sally threw a birthday party for the alien. "Nice party," commented Mark. "Nah, it SUCKS!" yelled Brian, who decided to burn the house down.
That's a sample of writing with a few paragraphs in one. Even though it's a small excerpt, you can see that it looks like just a blob of writing, like yours, which is very unattractive to a reader. Instead, space between paragraphs, such as:
Sally went to the mall. While there, she was attacked by a little green alien. "What do you want?" Sally asked sweetly.
"Your blood," answered the alien.
Later on in the day, Sally threw a birthday party for the alien. "Nice party," commented Mark.
"Nah, it SUCKS!" yelled Brian, who decided to burn the house down.
Now that the paragraphs are spaced, more people will be willing to read the story. I, for one, haven't read this, although now that I look at it it doesn't look like a story at all.
Well, whatever...
