Click HERE to see this thread with all of the graphics, features, and links.

me and my friend did this poem not so long ago ....so i'm gonna put in on here n see wot ppl think...its not tht good.....

sad and alone
in this darkened room
you promised you'd be back
but you haven't returned home
the dust on the cabinet
the dirt on the floor
you can tell it hasn't been cleaned
since you'd left from that door

waiting by the phone
as if to receive a call
i never wanted you to go
i didn't want that at all
i remember the day that black car came
to tell me you had passed
i cried for days and days
seemed my world was suddenly dark

i still have all the photos
of the day you left for war
all the letters that you sent me
still sitting in that drawer

you told me you'd come back for me
and lived the dream we shared
but they made you do another shift
it's like they never cared

they made you be the look-out
and they gave you a gun
if only they had realised
the end of your life had just begun

the enemy was hiding
in the bushed not far away
they saw you and they fired their shots
it's your life you had to pay

i'm walking around this empty house
with your photos on the wall
i wonder if life is worth it
without you here at all

my page is filling up now
my emotions line by line
i haven't been outside for days
i'm crying all the time

my tears are dripping on the page
smudging all my words
imagine how different it would be
if you didn't leave this earth

when we said "i do"
at that wedding stand
i imagined us growing old together
well...that as my plan

i dreamed we'd have some children
one or maybe two
we'd bring them up together
and show them what to do

all these things we'd do in love
and never be apart
i'm trying to get through this
trying to mend my broken heart

i'm locking up my feelings
and throwing away the key
my world is slowly fading
without you here with me

you helped me when i struggled
you always made my day
you lightened up my world
when my sky was grey

i'll guess i'll have to do it
somewhere down the track
i'll guess i'll have to believe
that your never coming back

*snif* wow.......... that is so beautiful, I love it. OMG, I think I might really cry.......................

haha...thanks

this one's pretty crappy...

there's a shadow in the darkness
not so far away
that shadow in the darkness
has been here all day

there's a shadow in the darkness
it doesn't know what to feel
that shadow in the darkness
doesn't want to believe it's real

theres a shadow in the darkness
it wants to be left alone
that shadow in the darkness
doesn't want to go home

theres a shadow in the darkness
who needs a helping hand
that shadow in the darkness
needs help to stand

theres a shadow in the darkness
standing alone with fear
that shadow in the darkness
has a lonlisome tear

theres a shadow in the darkness
with bruises head to toe
that shadow in the darkness
knows her mum doesnt know

theres a shadow in the darkness
her father addicted to drugs
that shadow in the darkness
her long hair he tugs

theres a shadow in the darkness
shes starving and shes cold
that shadow in the darkness
wants to be strong and bold

thers a shadow in the darkness
fearing the next whack
but that shadow in the darkness
is ready to go back

now theres no shadow in the darkness
she was sick of being alone
that shadow in the darkness
has decided to go home

is lonlisome even a word?

dis is a random one...not a very happy one...

I'm standing in this darkness
thinking of the past
why did you have to go
and leave me here so fast
when i walked into your bathroom
and found you on the floor
i saw the rope around your neck
and the knife over near the door
the slits that layed across your wrist
how come i didnt know
you could have told me you were depressed
you didnt even let it show
the blood around your body
there was so much
so red..
so thick..
you must have gone through so much pain
the thought makes me sick
now i have to suffer
with the memories of you
i wish that i could feel
all the pain that you went through

so beautiful, u r trying 2 make me cry now... i dunno if lonlisome is a word but it works rite?

ur last stanza in shaddow is a bit odd, but it ends it nicely....

thanks

your poems are sad but awesome i luv them there awesome

Originally posted by xtheusedxbillyx
sad and alone
in this darkened room
you promised you'd be back
but you haven't returned home
the dust on the cabinet
the dirt on the floor
you can tell it hasn't been cleaned
since you'd left from that door

waiting by the phone
as if to receive a call
i never wanted you to go
i didn't want that at all
i remember the day that black car came
to tell me you had passed
i cried for days and days
seemed my world was suddenly dark

i still have all the photos
of the day you left for war
all the letters that you sent me
still sitting in that drawer

you told me you'd come back for me
and lived the dream we shared
but they made you do another shift
it's like they never cared

they made you be the look-out
and they gave you a gun
if only they had realised
the end of your life had just begun

the enemy was hiding
in the bushed not far away
they saw you and they fired their shots
it's your life you had to pay

i'm walking around this empty house
with your photos on the wall
i wonder if life is worth it
without you here at all

my page is filling up now
my emotions line by line
i haven't been outside for days
i'm crying all the time

my tears are dripping on the page
smudging all my words
imagine how different it would be
if you didn't leave this earth

when we said "i do"
at that wedding stand
i imagined us growing old together
well...that as my plan

i dreamed we'd have some children
one or maybe two
we'd bring them up together
and show them what to do

all these things we'd do in love
and never be apart
i'm trying to get through this
trying to mend my broken heart

i'm locking up my feelings
and throwing away the key
my world is slowly fading
without you here with me

you helped me when i struggled
you always made my day
you lightened up my world
when my sky was grey

i'll guess i'll have to do it
somewhere down the track
i'll guess i'll have to believe
that your never coming back
I thought it was pretty good However, this one stanza sort of bugged me:

waiting by the phone
as if to receive a call
i never wanted you to go
i didn't want that at all
i remember the day that black car came
to tell me you had passed
i cried for days and days
seemed my world was suddenly dark

It doesn't have the same rhyming scheme as the rest of it... but other than that it was pretty good
Originally posted by xtheusedxbillyx
is lonlisome even a word?
Don't think so