shadow of the colossus....my story

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kash$king
it was moring as i awake next to my faitfull horse i hear something in the distance as i climb on my horse alto the sound gets lounder like a pounding i am a knight sent by the king to kill a colossus or gaint or what ever u may call them i was sent to get ride of them becasue it was killing off many villages that where important for trade.as i pull my sword from seath and i point it to the sun wich reflects it to the point of the nosie which i knew was the colossus becasue of the terable nise it makes. the sound of it is the sound of death comeing and comeing and all u can do is wait for it till then it stops when it snaps ur body in half.
as i began to kick alto's sides he sped up to a hill which gave me a clear view at the whicked monster..... its eyes bruned red,blue and yellow it seamed to changed with every attack it did. but the strange thing was there was nothing there it was like he was traing. as i truned around and got 100 feet away i quickly ran toward the hill jumped off of alto and landed on the gaints back its eyes glowed blue and ice shards came out of his back hiting my right leg. then the shards went back in and even though i was injured i still manged to stay on. as i held on with 1 arm and stabed blidly at the gaint beast. its tossed its head bucked its back ran aroung in a cicrle to try to get me off. and after all of that i still stayed on.... i wish i quickly fell to the groung landing on my back and that hurted my leg even more. as i try to move to get out of its path it's eyes trued red and fire spit from the horrible giants mouth as i indured the flames which i soon realzied he didt want to hit me but get the surrounding area and then he would watch me die as the fire got closer and closer i had no idea what to do so then i brung my self to my neas and watched as i would slowly die i looked into the eyes of the giant . and i saw alto comeing he ran threw the blazeing flames and aloud be to climb on his back the we rode away but the gaint was not done he came with us....to the kings castle... as we aprrochhed it many of the kings pointed and shouted i had no idea what they pointed to then i saw him the beast mouth was opend and yellow lightingh came down with a loud bang. the king ran out of his bedroom to see what happend the king yelled to the kings to kill that beast and so they tryed...and then they died as i was the only one who knew the attacks and how to tell what type would come next i had to fight the beast from alto we ran up besied it and i shoved my sword into the side for the hole way down leaveing a huge gash. what was left of the kings men where sent out with tourches and shoved them into thew side whith the gian flesh wound in it. i had givein the kinghs men the adveantage they needed to kill it.....and they did i was a hero. i based this on the shadow of colossus for ps2 the colossus i was talking about was the secod one look into his eyes.

Lightningrod
wrong forum

† Mäs †
As Cartman would say it..

:Get Da Fudge outa here "

GCG
I will ask Ushgarak (who is an english teacher) to do a couple of corrections in that paragraph. smile

Dark Envy
Originally posted by kash$king
it was moring as i awake next to my faitfull horse i hear something in the distance as i climb on my horse alto the sound gets lounder like a pounding i am a knight sent by the king to kill a colossus or gaint or what ever u may call them i was sent to get ride of them becasue it was killing off many villages that where important for trade.as i pull my sword from seath and i point it to the sun wich reflects it to the point of the nosie which i knew was the colossus becasue of the terable nise it makes. the sound of it is the sound of death comeing and comeing and all u can do is wait for it till then it stops when it snaps ur body in half.
as i began to kick alto's sides he sped up to a hill which gave me a clear view at the whicked monster..... its eyes bruned red,blue and yellow it seamed to changed with every attack it did. but the strange thing was there was nothing there it was like he was traing. as i truned around and got 100 feet away i quickly ran toward the hill jumped off of alto and landed on the gaints back its eyes glowed blue and ice shards came out of his back hiting my right leg. then the shards went back in and even though i was injured i still manged to stay on. as i held on with 1 arm and stabed blidly at the gaint beast. its tossed its head bucked its back ran aroung in a cicrle to try to get me off. and after all of that i still stayed on.... i wish i quickly fell to the groung landing on my back and that hurted my leg even more. as i try to move to get out of its path it's eyes trued red and fire spit from the horrible giants mouth as i indured the flames which i soon realzied he didt want to hit me but get the surrounding area and then he would watch me die as the fire got closer and closer i had no idea what to do so then i brung my self to my neas and watched as i would slowly die i looked into the eyes of the giant . and i saw alto comeing he ran threw the blazeing flames and aloud be to climb on his back the we rode away but the gaint was not done he came with us....to the kings castle... as we aprrochhed it many of the kings pointed and shouted i had no idea what they pointed to then i saw him the beast mouth was opend and yellow lightingh came down with a loud bang. the king ran out of his bedroom to see what happend the king yelled to the kings to kill that beast and so they tryed...and then they died as i was the only one who knew the attacks and how to tell what type would come next i had to fight the beast from alto we ran up besied it and i shoved my sword into the side for the hole way down leaveing a huge gash. what was left of the kings men where sent out with tourches and shoved them into thew side whith the gian flesh wound in it. i had givein the kinghs men the adveantage they needed to kill it.....and they did i was a hero. i based this on the shadow of colossus for ps2 the colossus i was talking about was the secod one look into his eyes.

My Guess How Much Errors: 45.

hotsauce6548
Number 1) Wrong forum. This should be in the Gnereal Fiction Area.

NUmber 2) My guess of errors: Much... much higher... than many.

Ken Kenobi
Originally posted by Dark Envy
My Guess How Much Errors: 45.

I say many more than 45.

Spelling, grammar, punctuation. Learn to use them buddy.

kash$king
u guys gota get a life who cares if its the wrong forum who cares about the moderators all i want to know is do u like the stroy omg get a life u people! censored

Ken Kenobi
Originally posted by kash$king
u guys gota get a life who cares if its the wrong forum who cares about the moderators all i want to know is do u like the stroy omg get a life u people! censored

I didn't even bother reading that because it is essentially a constant run on sentence.

hotsauce6548
If I were able to read that, I would check myself in to the nearest funny farm. happy


And how old might you be, kash?

GCG
Originally posted by kash$king
u guys gota get a life who cares if its the wrong forum who cares about the moderators all i want to know is do u like the stroy omg get a life u people! censored

You forgot to add:

..who cares if its not done with proper grammar, spelling and punctuation.

If a writer you are to become, you should start to fix those mistakes.

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