My life story

I started off in my dads balls and then one night he had sex and my journey began. I traveled through tubes and shot out from his penis and landed in my moms Vagina. I travelled through the Vagina and fought my way battling sperm. I beat their asses and got in an egg. 9 months later I popped out of the Vagina and started crying. A doctor slapped me on the ass and I coughed up fluid.

To make a long story short. I learned things, toched my first breast in 5th grade, kissed in 5th as well. I also learned how to ride a bike, and do science(build stuff) and now here I am.

🤨 okay....

Originally posted by Council#13
🤨 okay....

Originally posted by Council#13
🤨 okay....

Originally posted by The Crab
I started off in my dads balls and then one night he had sex and my journey began. I traveled through tubes and shot out from his penis and landed in my moms Vagina. I travelled through the Vagina and fought my way battling sperm. I beat their asses and got in an egg. 9 months later I popped out of the Vagina and started crying. A doctor slapped me on the ass and I coughed up fluid.

To make a long story short. I learned things, toched my first breast in 5th grade, kissed in 5th as well. I also learned how to ride a bike, and do science(build stuff) and now here I am.

so you just had your sex ed class then... 😕

Originally posted by TigerLover
so you just had your sex ed class then... 😕

✅

😑

😂 😂
You should publish this in your local paper.

Oh, I see this thread was edited. The first version was an instant classic...now it sounds like something from a textbook that was translated by someone who spent more time in 2005 playing GTA than breathing.

I'd like to make a request. Can we please change the title of this thread from "My Life Story" to "The Triumph of Today's Youth - Proof We Are Winning the Battle?"

Interesting.... 🤨

I think the guy should write short stories.........Or a title "I saw, I came, I conquered"...OR "Hay everybody, look at what I did" (with a southeren drawl)

😱

Originally posted by The Crab
I started off in my dads balls and then one night he had sex and my journey began. I traveled through tubes and shot out from his penis and landed in my moms Vagina. I travelled through the Vagina and fought my way battling sperm. I beat their asses and got in an egg. 9 months later I popped out of the Vagina and started crying. A doctor slapped me on the ass and I coughed up fluid.

To make a long story short. I learned things, toched my first breast in 5th grade, kissed in 5th as well. I also learned how to ride a bike, and do science(build stuff) and now here I am.

And now here you are, at the same level as you were in the beginning of your life story.

😱

😆

Originally posted by The Crab
I started off in my dads balls and then one night he had sex and my journey began. I traveled through tubes and shot out from his penis and landed in my moms Vagina. I travelled through the Vagina and fought my way battling sperm. I beat their asses and got in an egg. 9 months later I popped out of the Vagina and started crying. A doctor slapped me on the ass and I coughed up fluid.

To make a long story short. I learned things, toched my first breast in 5th grade, kissed in 5th as well. I also learned how to ride a bike, and do science(build stuff) and now here I am.

jk

Originally posted by The Crab
I started off in my dads balls and then one night he had sex and my journey began. I traveled through tubes and shot out from his penis and landed in my moms Vagina. I travelled through the Vagina and fought my way battling sperm. I beat their asses and got in an egg. 9 months later I popped out of the Vagina and started crying. A doctor slapped me on the ass and I coughed up fluid.

To make a long story short. I learned things, toched my first breast in 5th grade, kissed in 5th as well. I also learned how to ride a bike, and do science(build stuff) and now here I am.

He said vagina....and penis.... 😮 😂

wow.. are you still in 5th grade by anychance 🙄

Yes, and please congratulate him on finally learning how to breastfeed.

Originally posted by botankus
Yes, and please congratulate him on finally learning how to breastfeed.

...and learning how to ride a bike. ✅

I have a short fuse when it comes to trolls....

Closing