2089=Special Weapons And Tactics

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Aliies

Aliies

H. S. 6
Good stuff. I really like this beginning, and the prologue--sets you up for the story. thumb up

A few things I noticed, though, was that you used the same word twice or three times in the same paragraph a few times, but nothing major. Also something you may want to look out for is the run-on sentences; I noticed a few, but again, nothing major.


Anyway, good stuff, like I said. Please continue! smile

Aliies
Actually i would like it if you could point those flaws out, its not usually in my sytle to miss things like that...

I wrote this after being awake for 18hours and finally clicked save at 3:00am...

I was a tad tired when this piec popped out of my skul embarrasment stick out tongue

Aliies

H. S. 6

Aliies
As i said, i typed both the prologue and the first part whilst i was very tired. Thing like that don't normally and the double-semi-colon thing never usually happens...

Thanks for the head-up though; i type the fastest when tired and i'll edit it in the mornings to avoid that.

Your helpful critisism has been rewarding to me, as a writer i simply say; Thank you smile

Aliies
These old stories need attention, It's a shame to see them left alone for nearly a year, unfinished too... sad *Shame on me :P *

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