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So I was observing alot of the relationships that go on in KMC and other forums I have visted and noticed that alot of people who participate in an online relationship are already commited in real life to someone else. I really dont agree with this, and I do believe it is considered an act of cheating.

Say your real life boy/girlfriend was on another forum and one day you stop in to see what he was so attracted to it for and you notice somewhere in he display set up (under his signature or location) it said "I love you Dirty(girl/boy)3". How would you react?

I do think that alot of internet relationships can work out an I have seen it happen before, so I can't really see what would make internet dating and real life dating different when it comes to morality.

What are your opinions?

I will be the first to respond....yay!!!.....I think relationships on the internet can work out if people are honest......I mean if you are not honest nothing ever works out..........so that would be the key......and if your boyfriend or girlfriend is posting crap like that on the forum...thats f@$#ed up......I'd be oprn to finding a relationship on the internet.....hint hint...jk lol

How I see it as, is if you're in an online relationship, that's all well and good and all (I am the last person to say they are a bad idea, obviously), but you really say you're boyfriend/girlfriend or that you're going out because really.....you aren't.

I suppose how it comes down though is the bounds of your relationship and such, and in that aspect it's going to be different in every single case.

Honestly, I think they're usually nothing more then wishful thinking.

Originally posted by BackFire
Honestly, I think they're usually nothing more then wishful thinking.

Co-signed

Unless it leads to (lot's of) sex, what's the point in an on-line relationship? Sounds like an exercise in futility, if you ask me.

Go on. Ask me...

I think that an initial attraction can start over the internet on a site like this if they post something that makes you take notice of them and makes you curious about them, but if it is ever going to develop into anything deep and lasting, than there has to be real contact. To not believe this would be to underestimate the bond that physical presence brings, I think. Physical presence breeds affection in ways that flirting online or having conversations in these forums can not and affection is essential in a relationship. That can be hard to admit because it makes us seem more like animals than intelligent human beings but I think it is true.
As far as it being cheating: It might as well be. It certainly doesn't strengthen your relationship and the only way that it doesn't weaken it is if there really isn't any commitment in the relationship to begin with.

Originally posted by Ronny
So I was observing alot of the relationships that go on in KMC and other forums I have visted and noticed that alot of people who participate in an online relationship are already commited in real life to someone else. I really dont agree with this, and I do believe it is considered an act of cheating.

Say your real life boy/girlfriend was on another forum and one day you stop in to see what he was so attracted to it for and you notice somewhere in he display set up (under his signature or location) it said "I love you Dirty(girl/boy)3". How would you react?
I wouldn' t rationalize such behavior from my partner as harmless fun because there is no touching involved. I would feel betrayed, angry and hurt by online infidelity.

Originally posted by Ya Krunk'd Floo
Unless it leads to (lot's of) sex, what's the point in an on-line relationship? Sounds like an exercise in futility, if you ask me.

Go on. Ask me...


Krunk I am curious whats the point of an internet relationship if I am not getting laid 3 times a day (with someone else.)

It's not impossible for attraction of some kind to be there, but I believe online relationships are pointless if you both have absolutely no plans to make it happen in real life at some point.

If you meet online, then hang out or start visiting each other. It's more or less just a long distance relationship that started online. You can't help where you meet. If you start "dating" online but have no plans to meet at all, or are incapable of doing so (however long the distance is) then it's pointless.

-AC

Originally posted by Alpha Centauri
It's not impossible for attraction of some kind to be there, but I believe online relationships are pointless if you both have absolutely no plans to make it happen in real life at some point.

If you meet online, then hang out or start visiting each other. It's more or less just a long distance relationship that started online. You can't help where you meet. If you start "dating" online but have no plans to meet at all, or are incapable of doing so (however long the distance is) then it's pointless.

-AC

It's not pointless as long as one derives pleasure from it.

Originally posted by BackFire
Honestly, I think they're usually nothing more then wishful thinking.

I second that.

All on-line relationships are - by their very nature - 2-dimensional.

Sure, I can point out several people here on KMC that I'd probably enjoy meeting in real life as we seem to see eye to eye on a lot of things. And some people that I'd run away from screaming... (Ok, walk away from shaking my head).
It's easy to flirt and chat on-line, no one can SEE me, no one knows what I look like, or what kind of horrible habits I may or may not have.

Look at the number of false dating-adds, where people put up phony pictures and claim they're almost movie-stars.

On the other hand - what I like about on-line communities such as this, is exactly the fact that I can't SEE who I talk to. What I may have with me in my bag of biases or prejudices are useless here...

When I first got onto the net, I honestly thought that every pic I saw was a complete and utter fake.

Where the internet is so pivotal in meeting and connecting with people now, it seems like the majority of its users have adopted the mindset of "What's the point in sending a fake picture?" sort of thing. Either do send one, or don't. Still happens, but maybe I'm just used to it. It's easier to know if someone's genuine or not now with webcams and such.

It's evolved into just another way to meet people. On one hand people say it cuts down on human interaction, but on the other, I can come online and speak to my cousins in Canada more or less instantly. I've met some great people on the net who I have even had the pleasure of meeting.

With regards to online relationships though, I will agree with Bardock to be honest. If you enjoy it, go for it. I just think that if you don't make plans and effort to actually make it happen (and it can/does happen) in real life, then you're swimming in the ocean of wishful thinking.

-AC

Originally posted by BackFire
Honestly, I think they're usually nothing more then wishful thinking.

I basically agree with everything thats been said in here. The internet is a great place to meet but if you want a serious relationship, you'll have to meet the person.

As others have said, it's possible to start a relationship, but unlikely to last. Never trust computers with something that should be done face to face.

Haha. 'Online relationships'.

Doesn't even deserve the dignity of a term.

Originally posted by Victor Von Doom
Haha. 'Online relationships'.

Doesn't even deserve the dignity of a term.

I agree, it seems as though its a last ditch grasp for the reality challenged or those who, unfortunately, fall under the category of 'social broccolli'.

I think they are possible but as mentioned many times already there needs to be some physical contact between the two.

I actually met a pretty good looking and funny chick on-line. We dated for a bit.

Originally posted by Victor Von Doom
Haha. 'Online relationships'.

Doesn't even deserve the dignity of a term.
Well, I met my last boyfriend over the net.... sort of, I actually had met him before I just didn't know he was the guy I talked to online.

Originally posted by Ronny
So I was observing alot of the relationships that go on in KMC and other forums I have visted and noticed that alot of people who participate in an online relationship are already commited in real life to someone else. I really dont agree with this, and I do believe it is considered an act of cheating.

Say your real life boy/girlfriend was on another forum and one day you stop in to see what he was so attracted to it for and you notice somewhere in he display set up (under his signature or location) it said "I love you Dirty(girl/boy)3". How would you react?

I do think that alot of internet relationships can work out an I have seen it happen before, so I can't really see what would make internet dating and real life dating different when it comes to morality.

What are your opinions? Well, while a real life relationship is preferable, I would not be so upset if I found something like you described, now if my girlfriend was talking on the phone and taking trips at odd times in the year than yes, I would be mad.


But, you just have to have faith in your love, if you question it, then more than likely, your relationship will head south.

Originally posted by Victor Von Doom
Haha. 'Online relationships'.

Doesn't even deserve the dignity of a term.

Oh, I will need to ask you to elaborate that further....please.

Originally posted by Eis
Well, I met my last boyfriend over the net.... sort of, I actually had met him before I just didn't know he was the guy I talked to online.

It's OK as a facilitator.

Originally posted by Bardock42
Oh, I will need to ask you to elaborate that further....please. Thing is that online is not different from letter writing of old....Many relationships and Marriages were do to this.

Originally posted by Victor Von Doom
It's OK as a facilitator.


Talk to me VVD

Why, you want him??????????????????????????

No I am just the joker!

If I could make my sig easier to read you would understand its just a joke that plays abit on it

Originally posted by debbiejo
Thing is that online is not different from letter writing of old....Many relationships and Marriages were do to this.

This is quite true. During times of war in fact, there were a lot of people that wrote letters and would fall in love by their words rather than having them physically there with them.


Imagine your Grandparents tell you that they were pen pals and fell in love through correspondance of letters...

...we have simply updated times in which snail mail is a thing of the past, and have it replaced with email and the use of the internet.

Originally posted by A.D. Skinner
This is quite true. During times of war in fact, there were a lot of people that wrote letters and would fall in love by their words rather than having them physically there with them.


Imagine your Grandparents tell you that they were pen pals and fell in love through correspondance of letters...

...we have simply updated times in which snail mail is a thing of the past, and have it replaced with email and the use of the internet.

Fast communication, fast hook ups and fast break ups. I knew that email had some relationship to divorce rate!

I dont see the point in online relationships,I mean......how are you meant to have sex

Originally posted by K.Diddy
I dont see the point in online relationships,I mean......how are you meant to have sex Well, like real life relationships it's something you don't need to worry about.

Originally posted by A.D. Skinner
This is quite true. During times of war in fact, there were a lot of people that wrote letters and would fall in love by their words rather than having them physically there with them.


Imagine your Grandparents tell you that they were pen pals and fell in love through correspondance of letters...

...we have simply updated times in which snail mail is a thing of the past, and have it replaced with email and the use of the internet. thumbsup

History proves that getting to know each other through words meant more first....It's the meeting of the minds........first.......

Originally posted by Magee
Well, like real life relationships it's something you don't need to worry about.

Originally posted by BackFire
Honestly, I think they're usually nothing more then wishful thinking.
Well, I have read about one married couple who originally met while playing Ghost Recon online over Xbox Live.

Originally posted by Alpha Centauri
It's not impossible for attraction of some kind to be there, but I believe online relationships are pointless if you both have absolutely no plans to make it happen in real life at some point.

If you meet online, then hang out or start visiting each other. It's more or less just a long distance relationship that started online. You can't help where you meet. If you start "dating" online but have no plans to meet at all, or are incapable of doing so (however long the distance is) then it's pointless.

-AC
I agree with you. If your just going to sit there on the computer talking to your "boyfriend/Girlfriend" it has no point because humans need to Interact with each other in person before you can decide weather or not your compatible with someone.

Originally posted by soleran30
Talk to me VVD

so, you're asking for an elaboration.

For those who don't know, I met Adam_PoE on the net. We were friends on-line for a long time, and then started dating. We've met a number of times. So, should us no longer being together be a reason that dating off the internet is absurd? We're hardly a case study. Granted, perhaps we are a microcosm in understanding the situation. Neither of us were any different than we professed to be on-line. Nor do I think there's a point to being different on-line or off. But we're better suited to be together than most people who meet in person, at a club or bar. The specifics aren't any one elses buisness, but we still have issues. There's a reason we aren't together now. The ability to care for some one else absolutely still developed...beyond an "in-person" innitial encounter. I think that people in this day and age are still dubious of the internet. Sure, you have the chance of people lying. But, that happens just as frequently in a bar. It's up to the person experiencing it to decipher the truth of the matter. Eventually, the net will be just as legitimate a place for meeting people as is the starbucks down teh street for your apartment.

Originally posted by DarkC
Well, I have read about one married couple who originally met while playing Ghost Recon online over Xbox Live.

We call that the exception.

Hmmm... love, or rather, relationships online, can be one of the hardest thing on Earth, if its real. Most people dismiss it as something fake, to either sound hardcore on here, or for other reasons, but then wish they could be in a relationship with several "hot" people on here, but thats just people following the bandwagon, you know who you are, and I won't waste my time with that.

Long-distance and online relationships are often extrmemly difficult for several reasons, but also have easier advantages. Its all too easy for someone to make a life online which noone can disprove, and you have no choice but to trust it, but that again can happen in real life, so thats not the biggest problem. Obviously most people simply don't have the strength to handle relationships like that, requiring heavy attention and touch and care on a regular basis, nothing wrong with that either.

Some of the problems of long distance comes in at when a person is in an emergency, and you are the last one to find out, if you are lucky, this often means you have to take the chance of something happening to your partner and never seeing them again. Therefore it is often wise to make friends with their friends/family incase you get serious.

Trust is another issue of course, with the main problems of relationships as such being lack of physical contact, there is only so much you can give, and if things go sour, there may very well be a chance for a partner to cheat, and not tell you a thing. Scary thought.

There are some advantages though, I'd say the most important one is the connection someone must have to make a real relationship stay serious. Since there is no physical contact, there would have to be something else to keep two people coming back to one another, and if that is the case, then when they do meet, if they were who they say they were, there is a high chance it can continue that way... though living together may be a different story, but that again is the case for anyone. Also the distance allows you to be safe from psycho exes, and that has to count for something.

In my case, I didn't actively look for one, it just happened. It went from excellent to bad, and back to excellent (as some of you may know), and it took alot of dedication, and hard work just like anything else. And I'm still a big part of my someone's life everyday. Love is blind, and doesn't see color, sex, or even distance. Being heartbroken feels the same at any distance, so the love shouldn't be questioned. IF there is a someone meant for you, they could be anywhere on the globe, that being said long distance is hard, but not pointless, find out for yourself and not from others who had a bad experience or heard from someone else.

that was f*cking beautiful

Not as beautiful as you.

Where ya been mate?

Originally posted by Tha C-Master
Not as beautiful as you.

Where ya been mate? working applying to colleges looking for scholarships (cuz i'm broke as hell!) playing games

Originally posted by Black Rob
working applying to colleges looking for scholarships (cuz i'm broke as hell!) playing games I know that game all too well, what game are ya playin'?

City of Heroes

Originally posted by Storm
I wouldn' t rationalize such behavior from my partner as harmless fun because there is no touching involved. I would feel betrayed, angry and hurt by online infidelity.

Very True, tho online relationships (without already being in a real life one) can work out very well

hmmm.. it can work-out if both are open and honest,
I'm not sure of it,cuz as far as I know their ae guys who just play fools in girls.But I'm not pointing my finger to anyone here! O-o...
hehhehe..

*truth hurts they say!


by:soulwinner_marissa

Anyone here actually met someone at KMC and then met them in real life? If yes, has anyone taken the next step and started dating them?

Let me see, I live in North Carolina and the people I guess I would say I'm closest to at KMC live in England, Michigan, Canada, New Jersey, and England again. Don't really see me joining them for a night at the pub any time soon.

I know Fire and Storm are together, but not sure if that was because of KMC (I don't think so).

It's hard to date the internet. Dragging my cpu and monitor to a nice Italian restaurant is a pain in the ass.

two of my best friends met on the internet, they now live together, her moving from the states to live in Australia. i'm the best man at their wedding. online relationships arn't impossible, they're just not seen as a very easy way of doing it but i've seen people living a very happy life together after meeting online

Originally posted by Alpha Centauri
It's not impossible for attraction of some kind to be there, but I believe online relationships are pointless if you both have absolutely no plans to make it happen in real life at some point.

If you meet online, then hang out or start visiting each other. It's more or less just a long distance relationship that started online. You can't help where you meet. If you start "dating" online but have no plans to meet at all, or are incapable of doing so (however long the distance is) then it's pointless.

-AC

All true

Originally posted by botankus
I know Fire and Storm are together, but not sure if that was because of KMC (I don't think so).
Fire and I met on line in a chat room.

Originally posted by botankus
Anyone here actually met someone at KMC and then met them in real life? If yes, has anyone taken the next step and started dating them?

Let me see, I live in North Carolina and the people I guess I would say I'm closest to at KMC live in England, Michigan, Canada, New Jersey, and England again. Don't really see me joining them for a night at the pub any time soon.

I know Fire and Storm are together, but not sure if that was because of KMC (I don't think so). yes, I met an amazing man here on KMC and we met in real life and began 'real life' dating. He's from England and you Know Im from here in NC....very difficult but certainly NOT impossible.

Originally posted by Ronny
So I was observing alot of the relationships that go on in KMC and other forums I have visted and noticed that alot of people who participate in an online relationship are already commited in real life to someone else. I really dont agree with this, and I do believe it is considered an act of cheating.

Say your real life boy/girlfriend was on another forum and one day you stop in to see what he was so attracted to it for and you notice somewhere in he display set up (under his signature or location) it said "I love you Dirty(girl/boy)3". How would you react?

I do think that alot of internet relationships can work out an I have seen it happen before, so I can't really see what would make internet dating and real life dating different when it comes to morality.

What are your opinions?

LOSERS

Originally posted by Shelbert Lemon
yes, I met an amazing man here on KMC and we met in real life and began 'real life' dating. He's from England and you Know Im from here in NC....very difficult but certainly NOT impossible.

Okay, so there's one (Shellie) who's met someone they "met" on KMC.

Originally posted by botankus
Okay, so there's one (Shellie) who's met someone they "met" on KMC. make that two if you count him....

Originally posted by botankus
Okay, so there's one (Shellie) who's met someone they "met" on KMC.

Wasn't there a Thread about exactly this question a few months back...I can remember at least two more who met...

Oh, which reminds me, I did too.

Originally posted by Tired Hiker
It's hard to date the internet. Dragging my cpu and monitor to a nice Italian restaurant is a pain in the ass.

Comedy gold

Hmmm..Internet relationships are best treated with caution and a large pinch of salt. I found out, to my own expense, that investing too much emotion in one will only lead to hurt and frustration. If it's treated lightly, then I think it's all good, or if you know that you'll be able to meet up and form some sort of relationship in real life. Otherwise it becomes pointless and ridiculous. Plus it's very hard to not be suspicious or jelaous, it requires an insane amount of trust and some poeple, myself included, just aren't able to give that level of trust to someone over the net.

Originally posted by botankus
Okay, so there's one (Shellie) who's met someone they "met" on KMC.

I have met in real life someone I met on KMC as well.

I am about to this summer .

I think this is all pretty cool. Knowing someone well enough to want to meet them.

Originally posted by debbiejo
I think this is all pretty cool. Knowing someone well enough to want to meet them. You wanna meet deb ? Just let me find my jason mask and knife

I grew up in Detroit...........We know how to protect ourselves pretty well........Throw in some PMS, and you stand no chance.......

Originally posted by botankus
Anyone here actually met someone at KMC and then met them in real life? If yes, has anyone taken the next step and started dating them?

Let me see, I live in North Carolina and the people I guess I would say I'm closest to at KMC live in England, Michigan, Canada, New Jersey, and England again. Don't really see me joining them for a night at the pub any time soon.

I know Fire and Storm are together, but not sure if that was because of KMC (I don't think so).

Yes, A.D. Skinner and I met on here in 2003 and we are married now. We were not close in distance either. 600 miles apart. But love has a way of working things out.

I think that we probally are an exception, but not a rare one. We were old enough to make our own choices and actually be together. I think that it is naive to belive that a teenager who has raging hormones is going to be faithful to a boyfriend/girlfriend who they are likely never going to meet.

I think also that who you are online is always a little bit different than who you are truely. You have to get to know and love the true person, for it to work out.

Originally posted by Aurora
Yes, A.D. Skinner and I met on here in 2003 and we are married now. We were not close in distance either. 600 miles apart. But love has a way of working things out.

602 miles apart.

Believe it or not...I proposed to Aurora on our first date and things just seemed to be perfect with her and I.

I never thought that I would find a soul mate, and more specifically here on KMC, but maybe that is why she found me....4 days after I joined here !

cry

If anyone really wants to know the story of it all happened....

http://www.killermovies.com/forums/f34/t33186.html


You can follow that link

crybaby

That's so beautiful

Yeah, and honestly....it still feels like a dream.

I mean, Aurora and I are meant for each other, and people rarely find their soul mates in life !

Aurora is the goddess of the dawn...just wanted to add that.

It is a sweet story and sometimes it feels surreal that I am actually living it.

Originally posted by Bardock42
Aurora is the goddess of the dawn...just wanted to add that.

And A.D. is the God of what?????

X-files?

Originally posted by A.D. Skinner
And A.D. is the God of what?????

AD is the year of the Lord...that's pretty decent too.

Originally posted by debbiejo
X-files?

Wow, we make a pretty powerful couple.... LOL!

But I think Storm and Fire, have some pretty powerful names as well!!

Originally posted by Aurora
Wow, we make a pretty powerful couple.... LOL!

But I think Storm and Fire, have some pretty powerful names as well!!

True...you have spiritual power though...they have natural.....hmm....both pretty good anyways...

Originally posted by Bardock42
True...you have spiritual power though...they have natural.....hmm....both pretty good anyways...

You know, there are times that I feel very spirtual !

Then you should visit the Relgious Forum......

Originally posted by Aurora
Yes, A.D. Skinner and I met on here in 2003 and we are married now.

No shit? That's great. Congrats.

Originally posted by debbiejo
Then you should visit the Relgious Forum......

I have visited there...interesting place

Originally posted by A.D. Skinner
I have visited there...interesting place
Used to be cool...mostly idiots nowadays.

Originally posted by Bardock42
Used to be cool...mostly idiots nowadays.

Just misguided fools

Speaking of anyone in particular???

Originally posted by debbiejo
Speaking of anyone in particular???
I doubt anyone thinks you are an idiot Debbie.

Originally posted by debbiejo
Speaking of anyone in particular???

Yes.

^^ he does...........hahahaha.........But who listens to Germans.

Originally posted by debbiejo
^^ he does...........hahahaha.........But who listens to Germans.

Everyone?

Originally posted by Bardock42
Everyone?

Originally posted by Aurora


















Yeah, they do.

You just keep on thinking that and your world will be just fine..........hahahah

j/k

I think I aided in this thread going off topic. Sad too!

Originally posted by Aurora
I think I aided in this thread going off topic. Sad too!

Not that great of a Thread to begin with...but it's still perfectly fine, just pick it up and dust the dirt of and we can all enjoy it again.

But it is sad to me, I actually had a point to make in here. LOL

Originally posted by Aurora
But it is sad to me, I actually had a point to make in here. LOL

And you did, didn't you?

Yes, I did.

Originally posted by Aurora
But it is sad to me, I actually had a point to make in here. LOL NO, what you're saying is great!

Never had an internet relationship. Internet friendship...yeah, I had those and plan to have even more..

Originally posted by botankus
Anyone here actually met someone at KMC and then met them in real life? If yes, has anyone taken the next step and started dating them?
I know Fire and Storm are together, but not sure if that was because of KMC (I don't think so).
Who could forget Big Evil and Jackie Malfoy? That was a scandalous one there.

Yeah, I remember that one..........and didn't he have someone else after her also?

You mean one of his many alter-ego's?

Yeah, but he had another girl also............geez, he even contacted me.........

Originally posted by Ronny
So I was observing alot of the relationships that go on in KMC and other forums I have visted and noticed that alot of people who participate in an online relationship are already commited in real life to someone else. I really dont agree with this, and I do believe it is considered an act of cheating.

Say your real life boy/girlfriend was on another forum and one day you stop in to see what he was so attracted to it for and you notice somewhere in he display set up (under his signature or location) it said "I love you Dirty(girl/boy)3". How would you react?

I do think that alot of internet relationships can work out an I have seen it happen before, so I can't really see what would make internet dating and real life dating different when it comes to morality.

What are your opinions?

I don't believe, personaly that internet relationships can be considered an act of cheating, unless of course such is taken to the next level of actual meeting and 'doing the deed'

As far as internet relationships go, it cannot be really called a relationship. People can meet and chat online, maybe meet in real life and then maybe have a relationhsip, again in real life, but not over the internet.

Relationships are complex - in real life you cannot just turn our partner off when you're pissed, then logg on when you feel like talking to them. In real life you need to deal with shit in order to make it work.

Besides, a lot of things are easier said when they are written then when they are told face to face...

It's pretty hard in this kind of relationships, I've been in this difficult situation,especially if you're involved fallling out of love to some guy over the net. Kinda scary & I felt stupid about it!

Originally posted by lil bitchiness

Relationships are complex - in real life you cannot just turn our partner off when you're pissed, then logg on when you feel like talking to them. In real life you need to deal with shit in order to make it work.



I agree completely!

Online it is easy to hide from dissagreements or differences. You can show the person what you want them to see, and you ALWAYS have the option of just walking away.

In a real life relationship you cannot hide! It is tough at times but the rewards for having to deal w/ all the shit that real life piles on you are a million times better than any kind of reward online!!

A.D. and I had a wonderful "online" relationship, and although things are more complicated now I would never trade it back.

Again this is not saying one person is "right" or "wrong" here, but that some parts might be left out...
Until the two people meet, there will always be something left out, noone's debating that I don't think...
Originally posted by lil bitchiness
I don't believe, personaly that internet relationships can be considered an act of cheating, unless of course such is taken to the next level of actual meeting and 'doing the deed' I believe they should... since real feelings are involved... from personal experience on both ends... physical infidelity is not as severe as the person you "love" loving someone else, or being infatuated with them.

Originally posted by lil bitchiness
As far as internet relationships go, it cannot be really called a relationship. People can meet and chat online, maybe meet in real life and then maybe have a relationhsip, again in real life, but not over the internet.
A relationship is just a relationship between to people... it doesn't specify what the distance is, only that those two people interract in some kind of way...

As long as love is blind then relationships are relationships IMO.
Originally posted by lil bitchiness
Relationships are complex - in real life you cannot just turn our partner off when you're pissed, then logg on when you feel like talking to them. In real life you need to deal with shit in order to make it work. But wouldn't that only make things more difficult, again from personal experience on both ends, when a person vanishes, you cannot chase after them, or you have no clue what is going on until the last minute... most likely.
Normal relationships are actually easier to maintain, unless living together is involved...

The simple element of touch is why most long distance relationships falter, and also it takes alot of trust, and love to invest in something when you haven't seen that person. To patch things up that are severly damaged is another task of its own.

Not that living with people is easy either... thats another story of its own, but trying to negotiate or solve problems with words on a screen is much, much, more difficult, because there is less interaction and there's no prescence, nothing tangible. Which is a reason that infidelity skyrockets itself.

Long distance with a person who needs alot of attention and affection, i.e someone with a history of depression or something similar, is even more difficult, than being there for them in the flesh. Again, from personal experience.

There are two sides to each part, often the greatest strength is its own weakness.

Originally posted by lil bitchiness
Besides, a lot of things are easier said when they are written then when they are told face to face...

True, but they are also harder to solve written... than told face to face.

But all the things you've pointed out are what annoy me the most about distance, its not the lack of attention that bothers me, but the fact that the other person can turn you off when they want, or say things they would never say in your face.

Originally posted by Aurora
I agree completely!

Online it is easy to hide from dissagreements or differences. You can show the person what you want them to see, and you ALWAYS have the option of just walking away.

In a real life relationship you cannot hide! It is tough at times but the rewards for having to deal w/ all the shit that real life piles on you are a million times better than any kind of reward online!!

A.D. and I had a wonderful "online" relationship, and although things are more complicated now I would never trade it back. I know I dont post much in this thread but I have to say I agree completely as well.

I guess a better way to look at it would not be that long distance is hard because of the difficulty in "doing it", but the difficulty in maintaining it, and the fact that you get "less" out of it right away, except a good mental connection.

When it comes to relationships online, it's complicated. I was just talking to Darth Macabre about this a little while ago actually. I mean, what if your partner on the net died or something. For a lot of people, there's really no way to know what happened. Your relationship's over and you may never know why. So, I really don't see the point in getting into a relationship online unless there's a chance you could meet.

When I first started talking to A.D. on here, I had no intention of EVER meeting him. You never know how you are going to meet someone, at a bar, at school, or even online.

Thing will work out, if they are ment to be is my opinion.

Yeah, I try to believe that...It's just, if you live in Florida, and say the person you're talking to online lives in Austrailia or something, it's just hard to believe.

Originally posted by sailormoon
When it comes to relationships online, it's complicated. I was just talking to Darth Macabre about this a little while ago actually. I mean, what if your partner on the net died or something. For a lot of people, there's really no way to know what happened. Your relationship's over and you may never know why. So, I really don't see the point in getting into a relationship online unless there's a chance you could meet. Yea thats another problem, which is why I'd suggest knowing close friends and family.

Originally posted by Aurora
When I first started talking to A.D. on here, I had no intention of EVER meeting him. You never know how you are going to meet someone, at a bar, at school, or even online.

Thing will work out, if they are ment to be is my opinion. Agreed, considering what I went through myself. Boy oh boy...

Originally posted by sailormoon
Yeah, I try to believe that...It's just, if you live in Florida, and say the person you're talking to online lives in Austrailia or something, it's just hard to believe.

It can and does happen though.

Originally posted by Tha C-Master
A relationship is just a relationship between to people... it doesn't specify what the distance is, only that those two people interract in some kind of way...

Sure, I don't deny this. But I had an impression we were talking about relationships in romantic sense, and those are not the same if you have never actually met the person.
It has little to do with sex, but a lot to do with lack of physical presence - you are only typing words to someone, you do not have experience of actually looking them in the eyes when you are saying something to them. Physical interaction is very important, no matter who you are talking to.

Originally posted by Tha C-Master

As long as love is blind then relationships are relationships IMO.
But wouldn't that only make things more difficult, again from personal experience on both ends, when a person vanishes, you cannot chase after them, or you have no clue what is going on until the last minute... most likely.
Normal relationships are actually easier to maintain, unless living together is involved...

Im sorry, but I find this absolutey absurd.

Saying something to someone, face to face is far harder, and far more complex than simply typing those words down, and never having to SEE the look on their face or the frustration.
As I also mentioned, when you get angry at someone, you cannot just logg off real life - you need to deal with the shit, face to face, right there, right then.

When you have a boyfriend/girlfriend over the net where you never met, there are a lot of things you never get to do - he/she will never see you mad, or pissed off. Whenever you mad or pissed off, you won't come online.

You don't need your online girlfriend's/boyfriend's permition to go anywhere. You just go.
You also spend ridicuous amounts of time, sat at the computer, waiting for them to come online - you cannot come to their place and watch a movie.

Its so much easier to say things which you don't neceseraly feel over the internet - you can appologize millions of times, you can swollow your pride in a second and say you're sorry and that you were wrong - that is simply NOT the case in real life.

Some people are happy with online interatictions, and thats fine, but to call them relationships equal to those in real life is far fetched and unrealistic, imo.

Originally posted by lil bitchiness
Saying something to someone, face to face is far harder, and far more complex than simply typing those words down, and never having to SEE the look on their face or the frustration.
As I also mentioned, when you get angry at someone, you cannot just logg off real life - you need to deal with the shit, face to face, right there, right then.
I thought what Lil B just said was considered common knowledge.

Originally posted by lil bitchiness
Sure, I don't deny this. But I had an impression we were talking about relationships in romantic sense, and those are not the same if you have never actually met the person.
It has little to do with sex, but a lot to do with lack of physical presence - you are only typing words to someone, you do not have experience of actually looking them in the eyes when you are saying something to them. Physical interaction is very important, no matter who you are talking to. Which is why I said most would simply falter in the first place, noone is denying that physical involvement is not important one bit.

Touch is the strongest sense for a reason.

Originally posted by lil bitchiness
Im sorry, but I find this absolutey absurd. Probably because you misinterpreted what I was reading. I was simply saying there are strenghts and weaknesses to both, and that both are a relationship.

Originally posted by lil bitchiness
Saying something to someone, face to face is far harder, and far more complex than simply typing those words down, and never having to SEE the look on their face or the frustration.
As I also mentioned, when you get angry at someone, you cannot just logg off real life - you need to deal with the shit, face to face, right there, right then. Of course it takes less balls to type words online, who would deny that?

My point was that the impact of the words in real life, are much greater than those online, which is an advantage and disadvantage... Obviously me apologizing even on the phone or to that person, or ENTERTAINING that person would be easier if I was in their face, then trying to soothe them online... I've dealt with severe situations online before, so while it MAY (depending on the person), be an easier option to say things online, they also have less effect.

You agree? Sure, as its basically your premise below.

Originally posted by lil bitchiness
When you have a boyfriend/girlfriend over the net where you never met, there are a lot of things you never get to do - Noone's denying this... I agree.

Originally posted by lil bitchiness
he/she will never see you mad, or pissed off. Whenever you mad or pissed off, you won't come online. Nonsense, I've (as I'm sure others have as well)dealt with mad, angry, severe depression, and even... suicidal from a distance... from my experience its simply easier to deal with these face to face (say episodes of depression), and sometimes it IS easier to log off (in moments of great anger), so I give you that...

Originally posted by lil bitchiness
You don't need your online girlfriend's/boyfriend's permition to go anywhere. You just go.
I find that I don't need their permission in real life as well, the only exception to this rule would be if I was living with them... and yes you are also correct- authority is much less effective over a distance.

Originally posted by lil bitchiness
You also spend ridicuous amounts of time, sat at the computer, waiting for them to come online - you cannot come to their place and watch a movie. Thats just a problem with organization... but I don't really see what this alludes to as its common knowledge, so I won't attempt to delve into it...

Originally posted by lil bitchiness
Its so much easier to say things which you don't neceseraly feel over the internet - you can appologize millions of times, you can swollow your pride in a second and say you're sorry and that you were wrong - that is simply NOT the case in real life.

Again I agree, but since we subconsciously know this, the impact of this is also less as well... it is more difficult to "feel" emotion, to "stimulate" or motivate someone online, so once again the greatest strength is also its greatest flaw.

Originally posted by lil bitchiness
Some people are happy with online interatictions, and thats fine, but to call them relationships equal to those in real life is far fetched and unrealistic, imo. I would never do one for its own sake, but I am speaking from experience.

And my point was not to compare which is greater or less in terms of quality because that is an obvious point, but to say it isn't a relationship at all when it requires a great mental connection to keep one alive is unfair as well.

Originally posted by lil bitchiness

Saying something to someone, face to face is far harder, and far more complex than simply typing those words down, and never having to SEE the look on their face or the frustration.
As I also mentioned, when you get angry at someone, you cannot just logg off real life - you need to deal with the shit, face to face, right there, right then.

From my personal experience I would disagree with this. I find it FAR harder to type what I'm feeling/thinking about than to actually say it face to face. I also think it's harder to work out issues online because you can't actually tell 100% what the other person is thinking/reacting (though if you know each other well enough you can usually figure it out well enough), and when it comes to some things...it's very hard to work it out online, while it's far easier to do so in person.

If you have an issue with someone, simply logging off is the cheap way out. And you CAN do the equivalent of that in real life -- hanging up the phone, walking away, etc. Which is just as cheap of a way out of an argument. If it's something important, you work through it -- period.

So, I both agree and disagree with you. However, I'd say my situation is a bit different than most.

I however do find it silly that people say they're boyfriend/girlfriend when they're just talking online and have no real intention of ever meeting. But on the other hand, the feelings can be just as real as a real-life relationship.

Originally posted by Lana
From my personal experience I would disagree with this. I find it FAR harder to type what I'm feeling/thinking about than to actually say it face to face. I also think it's harder to work out issues online because you can't actually tell 100% what the other person is thinking/reacting (though if you know each other well enough you can usually figure it out well enough), and when it comes to some things...it's very hard to work it out online, while it's far easier to do so in person.

If you have an issue with someone, simply logging off is the cheap way out. And you CAN do the equivalent of that in real life -- hanging up the phone, walking away, etc. Which is just as cheap of a way out of an argument. If it's something important, you work through it -- period.

So, I both agree and disagree with you. However, I'd say my situation is a bit different than most.

I however do find it silly that people say they're boyfriend/girlfriend when they're just talking online and have no real intention of ever meeting. But on the other hand, the feelings can be just as real as a real-life relationship. I kinda agree in some ways, its easier in some ways when the person is there, but I don't think anyone would deny that it takes a strong mental/emotional bond to keep a serious long distance relationship afloat.