Barking Spider's Bum Tales

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Barking Spider
This morning I walked down into the subway and noticed that everyone is huddled in a spot closest to the exit. Paying no mind to the huddled masses I mosey over to my regular spot. It isn't unitl that moment I notice the unmistakeable ass and B.O. smell of of the homeless. I look to the end of the platform and I see him...Reggie! How do I know his name? He was walking in circles chanting "My name is Reggie, My name is Reggie"

So far this isn't an unusual story. Then Reggie decides to take his pants off. Naked from the waist down, Reggie ambles to the edge of the platform and begins pissing on the tracks. I was praying he would hit the third rail. Then Reggie, pee pee in hand and still pissing, begins twirling like Julie Andrews in the "Sound of Music". Pee is flying everywhere.

Reggie for his encore then squats and proceeds to take a dump on the platform. It was if Reggie hadn't shit in a week..cable after smellly cable.
At this point I was back with the huddle masses praying for the train to arrive. When it does, Reggie begins scooping up handfuls of shit and flinging them at the train. Shit is sliding down the windows. One woman on puked on the platform

Kongu_Dude
Originally posted by Barking Spider
This morning I walked down into the subway and noticed that everyone is huddled in a spot closest to the exit. Paying no mind to the huddled masses I mosey over to my regular spot. It isn't unitl that moment I notice the unmistakeable ass and B.O. smell of of the homeless. I look to the end of the platform and I see him...Reggie! How do I know his name? He was walking in circles chanting "My name is Reggie, My name is Reggie"

So far this isn't an unusual story. Then Reggie decides to take his pants off. Naked from the waist down, Reggie ambles to the edge of the platform and begins pissing on the tracks. I was praying he would hit the third rail. Then Reggie, pee pee in hand and still pissing, begins twirling like Julie Andrews in the "Sound of Music". Pee is flying everywhere.

Reggie for his encore then squats and proceeds to take a dump on the platform. It was if Reggie hadn't shit in a week..cable after smellly cable.
At this point I was back with the huddle masses praying for the train to arrive. When it does, Reggie begins scooping up handfuls of shit and flinging them at the train. Shit is sliding down the windows. One woman on puked on the platform

tohslaugh

JaehSkywalker
iwww!!

clap
Did you put any money in his hat for the street performance?

Barking Spider
Originally posted by clap
Did you put any money in his hat for the street performance?

No, he'd probably want me to put the bills betwixt his butt cheeks

clap
Originally posted by Barking Spider
No, he'd probably want me to put the bills betwixt his butt cheeks

You spell "penis" funny.

Barking Spider
Hey, I'm behind the gays...thrusting, sweating and smiling

DanZeke25
Your name wins.

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