How to be politically correct

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Corran
Something for both the boys and the gals.

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. She is not a BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED HUMAN.
2. She is not a SCREAMER or MOANER - She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE.
3. She is not EASY - She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.
4. She is not DUMB - She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.
5. She has not BEEN AROUND - She is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.
6. She is not an AIRHEAD - She is REALITY IMPAIRED.
7. She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY- She gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.
8. She is not HORNY - She is SEXUALLY FOCUSED.
9. She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS - She is MEDICALLY ENHANCED.
10. She does not NAG YOU - She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.
11. She is not a **** - She is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED.
12. She does not have MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS- She is PECTORALLY SUPERIOR.
13. She is not a TWO BIT WHORE - She is a LOW COST PROVIDER.


HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.
2. He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.
3. He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME - He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.
4. He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.
5. He is not a CRADLE ROBBER - He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS.
6. He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK -He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.
7. He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.
8. He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - He has SWINE EMPATHY.
9. He is afraid of COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY APPREHENSIVE

jayride
Thank you! This will save me millions in lawsuits at work.

Dexx
this title reminds me of a series of books called "politically correct bed time stories" ..damn funny....

ToMacco
cleaver things, Corran

Lara
those statments are just as insulting, if not more so than the alternative slang!

finti
dont be so conservative L`ra

Lara
why not! it's not a crime, IS IT?

finti
no if you want to be boring go ahead

Lara
avagot avagi ifago evergone! stick out tongue

mah
hear, hear!

Lara
like you know what that means?

mah
of course I do!big grin

Lara
coruse you do! :wink: :wink:

finti
enlighten us

Lara
rather not! its your turn to be confused! stick out tongue

Raz
Amen!

yerssot
hey! no need to use curses here! wink

finti
I dont think you know the meaning of it L`ra,
L`ra vorrei conoscere che cosa avete scritto ?

Captain REX
Uno goontaz porfavor. big grin

Okay, so I'm not bilingual...

Lara
avago avagi avage avagose avagon avagui!? stick out tongue

finti

Lara
and now we're both talking a load of jibberish!

finti
at least my thing is actually a sentence in another language

Lara
and is actually jibberish! laughing out loud

finti
it translate to this :
So you are just babeling nonsense

Lara
yep!

mah
is babbling the correct translation?smile

finti
it is

Lara
of course unless you live with my sister and then it's actually classed as a language coz we can contantly ***** at each other without mum jumping on the case, all we get is " shut up and speak english!"

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