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don't know if this wonder be considered rock or Emo.anywayz I made these lyrics. I've gotten attached to rock songs like AFI, 30 seconds to mars, Cold war kids,etc.

So im asking you r these lyrics good? Maybe it sounds more like a poem?!

Windowed Heart

Open the window
Can you im vulnerable?
It doesn't take a rocket scientist to know.
Like people say you reap what you sew

And if you attack my heart and you'll know
So...
Don't break the window(x2)
Please(x3)
You'll knock out the glass and let my heart bleed

Cause your the bad seed
With a tempting need to hurt the innocent
Then again my heart isn't for sale
Its mine so..

Don't break my window(x2)
Please(x3)
Other wise my heart will bleed
Do something for a start and protect the windowed heart.

It might sound kinda gay but I don't so thats why I asked you all.
What genre would this fit under anywayz?

Not emo, not good. You won't get anywhere being another AFI fan, learn something about music.

So it sucks??? Well im glad to have your honest feedback.

woof.

Not so good lyrics.

Originally posted by Bizzy Bullet
So it sucks??? Well im glad to have your honest feedback.
i could try to guide you in the right direction, as far as music goes, if you were so inclined. all depends what type of genre you're going for, man i am drunk

Basically, don't aim for a genre. Don't take advice, as to which genre you should go for either. It should be about what you feel, not, what genre you feel it should be in.

Originally posted by Bizzy Bullet
don't know if this wonder be considered rock or Emo.anywayz I made these lyrics. I've gotten attached to rock songs like AFI, 30 seconds to mars, Cold war kids,etc.

So im asking you r these lyrics good? Maybe it sounds more like a poem?!

Windowed Heart

Open the window
Can you im vulnerable?
It doesn't take a rocket scientist to know.
Like people say you reap what you sew

And if you attack my heart and you'll know
So...
Don't break the window(x2)
Please(x3)
You'll knock out the glass and let my heart bleed

Cause your the bad seed
With a tempting need to hurt the innocent
Then again my heart isn't for sale
Its mine so..

Don't break my window(x2)
Please(x3)
Other wise my heart will bleed
Do something for a start and protect the windowed heart.

It might sound kinda gay but I don't so thats why I asked you all.
What genre would this fit under anywayz? Oh, dude, incredibly bad.

And "what you reap is what you sew" ...ouch.

Hm.... You tried. I'll give you that. You gotta refine it. You can check out my stuff in the poetry forum if you want an example confused......tho only one person seems to like it.......ermm

it was...kinda...bleh...but I like the "window" concept. got anything else?

Originally posted by Bardock42
Oh, dude, incredibly bad.

And "what you reap is what you sew" ...ouch.
im dtrunk right now but im rpettyy sure theres a lou reed songs that has that xact line

Originally posted by Bardock42
Oh, dude, incredibly bad.

And "what you reap is what you sew" ...ouch.

I think it is an actually saying that was horribly, horribly deformed during the transaction from mind to computer.

Originally posted by Solo
im dtrunk right now but im rpettyy sure theres a lou reed songs that has that xact line
Not in this particular line up.

There's also a RATM song that has the famous biblical quote "What you reap is what you sow", but the sew thing is incredibly amusing...picturing it.

Originally posted by ESB -1138
I think it is an actually saying that was horribly, horribly deformed during the transaction from mind to computer.

Y-yes....lets assume for a moment that I am not an idiot.

Originally posted by Bardock42
Y-yes....lets assume for a moment that I am not an idiot.

Will do. WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
EEEEEE!!

Originally posted by Bardock42
Not in this particular line up.

There's also a RATM song that has the famous biblical quote "What you reap is what you sow", but the sew thing is incredibly amusing...picturing it.



Y-yes....lets assume for a moment that I am not an idiot.
Haha! I didn't even realize he spelled it wrong.

You should try not to rhyme so much.

Turn Turn Turn by the Byrds

-bEJ-xIKByA

''Can you im vulnerable?'' ?

As in vulnerably instant messaging or a typo?

Stone Samurai



Im unbreakable,I fight with passion
Take down my rival in a orderly and mannerable fashion
blood covers the battle field of the enemies I've slain
They all died by the sword I weild

(Chorus)
Im headstrong from time on
Survive the screams of the dead from now on
I can't pray to the shooting star to take back what I've done

The evil beast enters my soul
I wanna beg for my LIFE!
But too bad the poison took its toll
Somehow my trial will unfold and expose my past

(Chorus)
Headstrong from time on
Survive the screams of the dead from now on
I can't wish upon a star to stop what I've done

How about this one???

B-better.

Than?

Originally posted by Victor Von Doom
Than?

Worse.

Yeah, lyrics without music is poetry...

http://www.killermovies.com/forums/f83/

Originally posted by Bardock42
B-better.

But, let's face it; still utterly shit.

Originally posted by chillmeistergen
But, let's face it; still utterly shit.

You can't do no better.

You're saying that like it's a fact. I wouldn't mind if you'd put 'I bet' in front of those words, but you didn't.

Originally posted by chillmeistergen
But, let's face it; still utterly shit.
You're saying that like it's a fact.

Of course its not a fact. Its better than the first one.

Originally posted by Bizzy Bullet
Of course its not a fact. Its better than the first one.

Wasn't that hard...

Originally posted by Solo
You're saying that like it's a fact.

Yeah.

Originally posted by Bizzy Bullet
Stone Samurai



Im unbreakable,I fight with passion
Take down my rival in a orderly and mannerable fashion
blood covers the battle field of the enemies I've slain
They all died by the sword I weild

(Chorus)
Im headstrong from time on
Survive the screams of the dead from now on
I can't pray to the shooting star to take back what I've done

The evil beast enters my soul
I wanna beg for my LIFE!
But too bad the poison took its toll
Somehow my trial will unfold and expose my past

(Chorus)
Headstrong from time on
Survive the screams of the dead from now on
I can't wish upon a star to stop what I've done

How about this one???

hmmmm...it's better than the other one, and it's kinda short. it's also something that I have never seen before....(just trying to be supportive, here)