what extas do you think will be on the blu ray release of Indiana Jones
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John-n.co.uk
any ideas people ?
queeq
In about 6 months time.
Sadako of Girth
Will there be a decent, rewritten version of KOTCS based on the Darabont script (Minus fridge scene) plus also versions of the Trilogy movies starring Tom Selleck in DTS and 5.1...?
Sadako of Girth
Bummer.
Then its not the release for me...

Sadako of Girth
May re-buy Raiders instead.
Can't have too many copies about of Raiders.
Sadako of Girth
They'll probably have to include Raiders with KOTCS in order to shift the copies they want to.
(Like Blues Brothers and the ghastly Blues Brothers 2000, both sold for like a fiver, and the original BB was the way superior special edition/directors version!!!!! Thats how bad BB 2000 was!)
queeq
BB 2000.... *shudder*
Sadako of Girth
I know.....
Pure soul destroying franchisery at its worst.
Dark times. Dark times.
At any point that you have to involve "Son of" or "Generic added kid" in a sequel to a fairly adult movie with a big following, your movie is doomed. Take note, Mr.Speilberg.
If you add the kid, going for a Short Round factor or something, at least make them funny/useful to the plot/or at least bearable and non detrimental to the good things already existing about the movies..
Sadako of Girth
Thank you, Im glad you understand and that you gauge BB2000 in a similar light my respect for your viewing tastes is growing all the time.
Down with shitty kind of movie gimmickery that is a no compensation for a good plot/characters....!
Boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.......!!!!!!!
queeq
Although, to me BB2000 is a worse crime than Indy4...
Sadako of Girth
There is plenty of room for a fierce debate there.
They have a lot in common.
queeq
I agree... but BB2000 had nothing close to BB.
Indy 4 at least had a fairly decent first 20 minutes.
Sadako of Girth
I had it at 12.
Thats when they open the crate and all poop breaks loose.
And the beginning of BB2000 was ok too.....right up to where we are forced to meet Buster. From then on its a big, huge, steaming, rancid bucket of barely solid effluence.
queeq
And all we can scream is: WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY????
Sadako of Girth
Yep..... They traded the Blues-mobile for this...?
Should swapped for that Microphone.
queeq
We can only hope Dan Aykroyd will never go there again.
Sadako of Girth
Absolutely.
But if we bring the Indy IV parallel into it once more, Landis will pave the way for Buster to be the new Blues brother and the trilogy will be about his ascent to complete franchise banality.
queeq
I haven't heard from Landis in ages. Is he still alive?
Well, at least they have one good reason to screw it up: they miss John Belushi. What's Lucas' excuse?
Sadako of Girth
Heh. His excuse is that Denholm Elliot is dead and Sean Connery read the script and rightly bailed...

A poor one, but as the old addage goes, bad actors in a well scripted movie will result still in a watchable movie...but even the best actors in the world when shooting a shit script cannot save it.
I think Landis is still alive, yes, but 'tis very true that he has been pretty quiet of late.
queeq
He used to be great, before the dark times, before Beverly Hills Cop 3.
Sadako of Girth
LOL At least he stayed true to the stylistic form set out by the 1st 2 movies.. Lucas and Speilberg and a few others are in a queue at the fairground in III, apparently.
queeq
But it was still crap. Not up to par with the great Landis movies like BB, Into the Night, Trading Places and Coming to America.
Sadako of Girth
Not to mention 'American Werewolf in London'.....
It was still better than Indy IV though. (and definitely superior to BB2000, in that while watching BHCIII, my eyes never bled and I didnt feel compelled to railway spike my eardrums out.)
queeq
AWIL... of course. A masterpiece.
Sadako of Girth
Yup. They dont make 'em like that anymore...
queeq
Well, not too often no.
Sadako of Girth
Well put it this way..... In places that transformation sequence had me going "how the f*** did they do that...?" for years...
Just like that bit in "The Thing" where that guy got his arms bitten/ripped off....
When I look at any other effects today, its obvious....
Usually CG bloody I.
queeq
Hehehe... I get ya. It doesn't seem much of an effort anymore.
Sadako of Girth
Yup.... That paired with being jaded slightly by the magic days of cinema with soul, makes yawn worthy stuff of current sterile mainstream hollywood releases.
I was watching Hannibal Brooks the other day..... That bit where the officer is up on the cable car wire all that way up, knowing that if the actor fell, he wouldnt have his fall broken by a bunch of blue screen 2ft under him.. it made for genuinely gripping/compelling viewing as the context of the scene wasnt in the middle of a world where everyone can do magical ninja matrix shit...
queeq
True. They had a similar stunt in Die Hard 4 though: the guy falling from the helicopter was a genuine fall. The problem, you never know if it IS real these days, you need to see the extras to see if it's a genuine guy falling from a building, or something easy blue screenish.
Sadako of Girth
Absolutely. When theres to much of it, it all becomes silly/too far moved from reality. Like the bit with the chopper or the Jet/truck bit in DH4...
Borders on shark-jumping..
queeq
That bit was a little over the top. But shooting a helicopter with a car... that was classic.
Sadako of Girth
Well...he was out of bullets.

Sadako of Girth
Ahhhhhh the festive season of Die Hard 1 and 2 is almost upon us once more.
queeq
Festive season?
DH2 sucks BTW.
Sadako of Girth
Not too badly, in its uncut form.
But I wouldn't piss on the TV edit version if it was on fire.
queeq
It's not up to par with the other three.
Sadako of Girth
Yeah, but its still superior to most other action movies.
DH: 9/10
DH2: 7/10 (uneditted) 6/10 (TV edited)
DH3: 8/10
DH4: 8 or 9/10
Is how I see it.
queeq
I guess it is...

Sadako of Girth
How would you rate them, yourself...?
queeq
DH: 9/10
DH2: 5/10
DH3: 7/10
DH4: 8/10
Sadako of Girth
Fair play..
*Reminds himself to rig Queeq's video to play only Die Harder whenever it is christmas time*
queeq
Like that would help.

Sadako of Girth
Dont worry, it'll be the superior full undiluted version.

queeq
There's no such thing.
Sadako of Girth
The uncut version on DVD is all that.
I saw the TV edit once and wanted to punch Renny Harlin in the face.
queeq
I never saw the TV edit because they don't do that in my country.
Sadako of Girth
You lucky country...!
We probably caught up with you on the Stella drinking.
We have nearly caught your neighbours up in the Weed smoking and Hoes-having too.
Well that being the case with your TV censorship, you have little excuse for disliking the movie that much...

queeq
You never watched it sober?
Sadako of Girth
Yep. Last year.
And I wanted to punch Renny Harlin in the face then too.

queeq
See!

Sadako of Girth
Ahhhhhh but combined with beer, The whole Die Hard saga is unbeatable.
Nobody said that it was meant for the unbeered viewing normally associated with a watching of Citizen Kane...

Sadako of Girth
I do think DH3 presents a challenge on when the beer-event horizon has been crossed though...
"Kittenzzzzzzzz, zackssssss, Catzz, Wi-BLUUUUUURRRRAAAP-vvves....?"
*Pukes on self while pondering the conundrum*
queeq
*pondering the conundrum as well, in the sense of: what the heck is he talking about?*
Sadako of Girth
I was referring to the "On the road to st.Ives" wriddle that Willis and Jackson are set to work out... remember..?
BW:"Wheres the man...?"
SLJ: "Sitting in the f***ing road...!!??!! How the hell should I know...?" (SLJ then goes on to explain the mechanics of the wriddle to the badly hungover McClane.)
queeq
Ah right... the extensive spelling distracted me. Hehehe
Sadako of Girth
Understandable.
It was kinda hard to emulate that dialogue in 'drunkish' or 'pissed-ese'.

Sadako of Girth
So, on the Blueray extras, is there anything that acknowledges the fan reaction to the release of the movie...?
Or did they just whitewash it with the usual self obsessed LFL promotional banter...?
queeq
Of course.
Frankly, I haven't watched the extras. I'm getting a little bored with the same ole same ole smoochy making ofs... I want more Making Of''s like the one on the TWelve Monkeys DVD or Lost in La Mancha. The best ever....
Oh and I liked the ones on the Alien Quadrilogy and on the latest Blade Runner DVD: honest, shows all the crap that went on etc. That's a lot more interesting than the : oh, it was the best experience in life - stuff.
Sadako of Girth
Agreed 1000%
Especially on the quality of the Quadrilogy stuff.
Thats a very good example of how it should be.
queeq
I'm still hoping that we'd ever get something like that on Star Wars. Why is Ridley Scott getting all the good stuff... (most of it IS good stuff, but still, why can't others be as honest as he is... )
Sadako of Girth
Well you see Ridley Scott hasnt sold out and is still the artist that he always was.
Speilberg and Lucas are fat and lazy and probably tell the studio what is going on the DVD whereas Scott strikes me as being opposite to that and seems to be more subject to conventional demand.
queeq
Moreso even. Because he usually gives us a lot more on DVD than many other directors. Not only does he continue to explore the possibilities of his films (see Alien, Gladiator Extended Edition, American Gangster E.D.) but also uses it to restore his original ideas (Blade Runner, Kingdom of Heaven). And he allows for very open minded documentaries. I guess he's just a guy that goes about his business and enjoys letting us share that experience.
Spielberg doesn't like DVD and stuff very much I think. Not to do any extra work for it that is. I wonder why... I remember him saying on the Lawrence of Arabia DVD that it was such a wonderful experience watching the restored 222 minute version in 1989 with David Lean himself. And how David Lean kept talking to Spielberg how everything was done, just like, and I quote Spielberg, "watching a DVD with a director's commentary". Why doesn't he do any of that then???
Sadako of Girth
Well he claimed to be a massive TFs fan too....
I dont trust his word anymore.
queeq
Well, Spielberg has given me plenty of movies to enjoy forever. With 1941, TAOS is only his second major bummer. That's not a bad track record. I'm sure he'll give us another good movie. With Lucas I'm not so sure.
Sadako of Girth
Well as the old addage goes: "As long as there is a little boy to fixate on in his story, SS'll be there."
GL might still fluke it... but he'd better let Kershner direct everything for him for acting performances, and let Gary Kurtz get in there and flesh out any ideas... it is his only hope.
And lets not forget that War of the worlds (Strong start weak finish) was highly flawed, as A.I. (Weak start gerat finish) arguably was too, and Spielbergs other producer titled jobs have sucked of late..... TFS certainly did.
queeq
Okay, WotW wasn't very great. And AI sucked at the end, if you don't mind me. He should have ended the film with the boy stuck under the ferris wheel staring at the Blue Fairy - so close and yet unreachable. Then he was truly human.
Sadako of Girth
Fair play that could have worked. I'd agree with that.
queeq
The last ten minutes was the usual Spielberg mushy-happy-family-ending, but so forced that I thought that was bad stuff. Sure, the other ending may have been less optimistic, but at least that would have worked.
Oddly enough, Spielberg claims that ending actually came from Kubrick. I wonder if he'd really let it in the final cut though. But we'll never know.
Sadako of Girth
The strange thing is that all I remembered about the end was that bit underwater and the statue...... my memory of the movie ends there.
Thats why I considered it so.
Now you have reminded me that had shit after that....... points off.
queeq
Yeah the futuristic shit.
See! The underwater bit was a natural ending. But no, Spielberg needed another ten minutes to forcefully turn it into something mushy-feel-good.
Sadako of Girth
Well of course.
On screen, he seems obssessed by kids (boys chiefly) to the point that it sickens the audience these days, yourself included, by making bad writing calls for the sake of his worship.
Therefore, regardless of what it does to the movie, the kids in question will be treated in a wretch making way throughout the movie until it becomes little more tolorable than just another movie for Speilberg's private collection only. Like WOTW.
Cruise's son should have been toast.
But nooooooooooooooo. He did better than the national army, escaping certain firey death and got home to his nans, hundereds of miles away.
Same with AI.
I know Im not the 1st to pick up on this.
Off screen..... Well I dont even wanna speculate about the VERY worrying hundreds of child sex allegations made against him I just found out about. Look em up.
That he was defending Micheal Jackson's sleeping with other people's kids paired with his onscreen nods to preference, are not good IMO.
Sadako of Girth
Did also find out just now, interestingly, that Jackson had a big falling out with SS after Jackson was denied being in "Hook".
He made Jackson's hate list apparently. (Which he tried to consumate by a bloodbath black magic curse ritual against Spielberg
SS still defended him though, since.
(In the Arviso trial period, Im sure it was.. man Im gonna be sorry if it was John Landis I was remembering lolz)
Its like the story that MJ and GL (himself having a lot of allegations behind him too, apparently) fell out because GL blew out MJ's plans for a transformers like film where he turned into a car and had kids sit in him.
Man Im really starting to worry now thinking about this.
If GL or SS were/are nonces, I would have to face a life with no Star Wars or Indy on principle.
I come to you on this Queeq, as you are the biggest fan of SS that I know, you may be able to debunk this....
So please, say it aint so....!!!
queeq
Honestly I haven't heard any of these stories myself. So can't help you there. Besides, if I have to value movies based on the makers' private lives, I think we'd have to ditch a lot of art as well. There have been many artists with debatle lifestyles.
So far I give SS the benefit of any doubt. So he likes mushy endings. Even Minority Report had one, but luckily it was VERY VERY SHORT. So a minor glitch in an otherwise superb film.
All in all, Spielberg needs to make his next flick rock again.
Sadako of Girth
Originally posted by queeq
Honestly I haven't heard any of these stories myself. So can't help you there. Besides, if I have to value movies based on the makers' private lives, I think we'd have to ditch a lot of art as well. There have been many artists with debatle lifestyles.
So far I give SS the benefit of any doubt. So he likes mushy endings. Even Minority Report had one, but luckily it was VERY VERY SHORT. So a minor glitch in an otherwise superb film.
All in all, Spielberg needs to make his next flick rock again.
Damn good point about the art, now if DiVinci had not paid a parking ticket, or was a thief I could live with that...
But some things are too reprehensible for me: Which is why no Michael Jackson music ever gets played in my house.
Well thats good news then anyway, hopefully its all just nothing and fallacies... thanks for the consult.
queeq
Nothing and fallacies.... you talking about TAOS again?

Sadako of Girth
Could very well have been, eh....?
Sadako of Girth
It is an embarrassing pubic hair at the dinner table of a great trilogy.
queeq
It certainly inspires you to find to most poetic ways to decribe your loathing.
Sadako of Girth
LOLz I guess it does.. ..it is my most low down, hated shitty muse.

queeq
You must be very grateful to Lucas.
Sadako of Girth
Moreso to Speilberg really.
For participating...and for letting his co-rapist rape Indy and not stopping him. Its one thing to rape the shit out of your own thang, but to have your friends come round and rape Indy too...?
Man that even more evil and twisted.
Sadako of Girth
*As Queeq and Sadako converse, we cut to the Gophers squeaking on in reaction to every spoken word.*
There. A more ridiculous and heinous version of KMC, bought to you by Spielberg and Lucas..
If inserting inserts of squeaking creatures seemingly having the mental capacity to be judging the human situation in front of them in a completely informed way, do no damage to the dramatic credibilty of the situation...
(as you would assume someone was thinking during the making of KOTCS)
..then lets SS edit them into keys scenes of Schindler's list and see what happens at the cinema.
queeq
Now that would be an interesting notion: Gophers in Auschwitz. Sounds like the title of the next GL/SS collaboration.
Sadako of Girth
lolz "Indiana Jones and Gophers in the Auchwitz betweeeeeeeeen Auchwitzes."
queeq
I'll submit the idea tomorrow. They'll love it, maybe Koepp will write again.
Sadako of Girth
If the new script is just the following:
Opening:
Paramount logo turns into a small but seemingly identical mound of Gopher dump on hilly European vista. The gopher admires its work.
Boom! From left to right suddenly a low flying, burning thing flies overhead from foreground to background.
A Big tracking scenery-reveal shot across a hilly cold landscape.
A sign blows in the harsh winter wind. A sign in german partially obscured by shadow and lense flare..
We see now that the firey object was a late 195Os small passenger jet with 'lack of engines' trouble as it makes its flame aided descent to the trees and hills below...
The plane crashes horrifically after the ring wing clips hill at maximum spped. The wreckage explodes 600ft down a hill.
Close tracking shot through the rolling fireball of twisting wreckage mashing and twisting as it spreads out.
Camera zooms to an area still smoking that the fuselage has just rolled over revealing a stunned Gopher and a more cynical only-casually-impressed Marmot.
The gopher turns to the Marmot
and in subtitles translated from Germanic-to-gopher-to-English says: "Im too olllllllllllld for this shit."
In their background, the camera refocuses and we get a clear shot of the sign we saw earlier.
It says: "Willkommen to Auchwitz".
Camera cuts back to a shot from front showing plane's fuselage coming to a grinding halt.
Defiently it explodes one more time seemingly just for the Bay of it.
Slow pan across the jagged collection of twisted metal and smashed seats blended with the landing gear........we see the remains to the galley compartment.
Another large explosion smashes through it destroying everything including the fridge door which is punched open from inside.
The camera retreats allowing for a full hero shot reveal of Indy as he leaps out of the fridge and....................................
...........poop pooop poop poop poop poop poop poopp poop poop pooooooooooop poop poop poop poop poop
poop poop poop poop pooooop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poooooooooop poop poop poop poop poop pooooooop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop pooppoooooooooop poop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poopy poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poooooooooooooooooooooooop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop pooooooop poop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop poop poopity poop-poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop all poop and no good film make Koepp a big poop poop poooooooooooooooooooooooop poop poop poop poop poop poop poooooooop-p-p-p-p-p-p-p poop
poop poop poop and poop pooppoop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop
poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poooooooooop poop poop poop poop poop pooooooop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop pooppoooooooooop poop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poopy poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poooooooooooooooooooooooop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop pooooooop poop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop poop poopity poop-poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poooooooooooooooooooooooop poop poop poop poop poop poop poooooooop-p-p-p-p-p-p-p poop
poop poop poop poop pooppoop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop poop
Camera close in showing Indy's horrified reaction.
End of act 1.
queeq
Excellent.
For a moment I thought you'd have the gopher emerging in a gas chamber, but noooooooooooooo.... you had to write with taste.
Sadako of Girth
Oh... ......you've already read act III...?
Might as well not bother posting it then...

queeq
Indy then has to save the gopher from being gassed, for the animal is the key to the future of the planet.
Sadako of Girth
Indeed. I reckon he would rescue it.
(But then later in a fit of in-insanity, beats its CGI head in against the nearest wall to the strains of the truck scene music.)
queeq
After which Joseph Mengele gets so depressed after losing his beloved medically engineered gopher that he lets all the prisoners go and leaves for South America to ponder his life over a crystal skull.
Sadako of Girth
Mien Gott!
It sounds like a seller...!!!
Contact Michael Bay to direct all action scenes immediately.
Yes! Shiny! Sleek! Fast!
All in 'Too-damned-close-to-the-action-o-vision.'
Big shiny cgi gophers with big tittys......... and BIG explosions!!
The tagline: "You'll believe a gopher can reich...!!!!"
queeq
The Man with the Hat is back... and this time he's killing gophers.
Sadako of Girth
lol
Part of Indy's adventure could take him to the Caddyshack golf club but 20 odd years before the events of Caddyshack...
Cut to Indy looking out of his chalet's window whilst grumbling "Those lousy rich kids."
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