The Goat and The Junkie

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Jericho Zerø
The morning was going rather well, until I managed to wake up. I should have known that 8am was a bad time to fall into that pit of despair I call the waking mind, but instead crawled from my bed and got dressed, heading out into my car and driving off toward my classes for the day. No sooner had I made a sharp turn than my vehicle flipped three times, splitting my head open and causing me to bleed out until I was naught but a prune-like being. Just as I had lost all hope, I saw a cloven hoof and a wheelchair approach from teh distance and I knew... My soul was lost...

Mairuzu
Yea, we know... you told us

Sol Valentine
OH MY GOODNESS!!!!!!

Jericho Zerø
Originally posted by Mairuzu
Yea, we know... you told us

(Different thread, different idea. Patience, my padawan.)

Scythe
As I stared down your retarded, split-head. I decided to defecate in it with vile eruptions that would soon mend your cranium back together. I pointed with my disgusting, diseased finger at a nearby Burger King which would aid us in our search for free paper towels to clean your shit and a roll of toilet paper that we can flush down the toilet while we pass gas and let the small kidnapped child smell it.

But I digest, and sooner or later we're off on some b*tch or other....what? Who's that? Tell him I'm not home right now, I'm on the internet......oh f*ck, see what I typed??!

Jericho Zerø
So naturally, I pulled mysefl together, quite literally, and broke out my axe of DOOOOM! Somehow, the kidnapped child ended up unconscious and was chained to a wall with barbed wire or whatnot and covered in acid, the bloody mess only looking worse due to the nature of the Burger King's lack of a lack of hygiene, the mess spreading increasingly as the manager screamed some nonsense about f*cktards and random grease stains I'd left on the bathroom walls when I decapitated the acne-covered register-boy.

Scythe
Don't lie to the people, just say the truth, I ate his organs and tossed his fecal matter at passerbys. Who says Oscar Meyer is wrong for our children?!

Jericho Zerø
Well, I thought to tone it down for the underagers in the crowd, though if you insist, then so be it known that you also managed throwing a cannibal midget at the creepy-ass guy in the Burger King costume, thus causing him to have his face eaten off and his scabs oozed into the ketchup bins! Crackers! Crackers! But no squeezy cheese!

Scythe
Dude, I swear, Burger King's mascot is like a serial rapist, look at him...

http://blog.clickz.com/archives/king.jpg
He might be a pimp?

http://towleroad.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/burger_king_babes_2.jpg
Just maybe a pimp...?

http://www.adrants.com/images/burger_king_brooke.jpg
He can't get with that....

http://www.adrants.com/images/burger_king_brooke.jpg
http://www.humormeonline.com/images/photolaughs/BurgerKingCupHolder.jpg
What the hell?!

http://www.humormeonline.com/images/photolaughs/BurgerKingCupHolder.jpg
Oh whoops, sorry, this one's from my personal collection...

Jericho Zerø
That's very tr--

What the HELL kind of personal collection is that possibly from? Nevermind, I dare not know, lest I be scarred for life...

Heheh... Injury humor...

Scythe

Jericho Zerø
Oh, right-o, then. I smell waffles...

Scythe

Jericho Zerø
Man, you should warn me, I had my nose open and everything...

Scythe
Ah shitz

Jericho Zerø
Indeed.

Scythe
http://powet.tv/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2006/10/sneak_king.jpg
WTF?!

Jericho Zerø
Wouldn't she see him there and like... Call the cops to report a stalker or something?

I bet there's a retarded kid in the King outfit... It would explain a lot...

Scythe
It's Al Gore in there.

Jericho Zerø
I had heard he was the clown from Mickey D's... Hm... Perhaps I was told wrongly? Someone has lied to me... I shall hunt down the bastards...

Scythe
Nice. Hahaha.

Jericho Zerø
Well, they shouldn't be allowed to tell me to avoid the Mickey D's clown, he's Al Gore, if in all honesty, he's the King... Elvis twitches in his grave every time someone calls that mascot "The King..."

Scythe
Haha, I know.

Jericho Zerø
I know how I'l exact my vengeance... I'll take them for a drive in my car...

Scythe
Haha, well I'm off everyone take care.

Jericho Zerø
I've had a discovery... Apparently adding gasoline to a fire makes it worse...

Scythe

Jericho Zerø
Originally posted by Scythe
I've had the same discovery, those obese, gasoline-filled children I've been sending to christmas fires has shown me what it's like if the Earth popped a zit.

Ah, yes, those are kinda explosive... The fun ones to throw in, though, are the ones who've had a nice touch of alcohol in them. It makes an even bigger explosion, then... Every time, you hear this loud bang just as they hit the first sparking ember.

Scythe
I've stopped filling them up with alcohol as it's made me seem like a pedophile threatening to drink their insides and splurge in their oval shaped wounds I inflict on them, but it makes for an awesome hard-shot!

Ripper Jacc
Now, that, I do believe.

Scythe
What, that I'm a pedophile for threatening to drink kids, or that it makes a mean shot?

Ripper Jacc
Ah, the mean shot. Sorry, my vague, imperceptive statement threw me off when I re-read it, too.

Scythe
It's all good, haha. What's everyone up to today?!

Ripper Jacc
We don't have many visitors in this joint, do we?

Scythe
Originally posted by Ripper Jacc
We don't have many visitors in this joint, do we? Give it time young 'un, we shall.

Ripper Jacc
And so they crowded around, looking for a means to feed themselves, though all we could offer was the decayed fecal matter of Scythe and an acidic mixture of ratfinks, suicide tanks, and cannibal girls...

DeathKap
I was laughing so hard from the Burger King pics laughing

Ripper Jacc
He's the ultimate leading pedophile in the nation: the one, the only... Burger King...

Scythe
Originally posted by DeathKap
I was laughing so hard from the Burger King pics laughing And none of them were photoshopped, that worries me.

Ripper Jacc
I was actually wondering if you'd photoshopped any of those... Now I'm worried a bit meself...

Scythe
Originally posted by Ripper Jacc
I was actually wondering if you'd photoshopped any of those... Now I'm worried a bit meself...

Yeah I know, hahaha. They were actually taken from Burger King's official website... Yeah...

http://i165.photobucket.com/albums/u75/judithkayakat/cat_goat2.jpg

Ripper Jacc
I love that pic. The cat looks so comfortable up there, and the goat looks stoned all to Hell.

Scythe
Originally posted by Ripper Jacc
I love that pic. The cat looks so comfortable up there, and the goat looks stoned all to Hell.

Hahaha, good observation.

Ripper Jacc
Me mum always said I had a sharp eye.

Scythe
Originally posted by Ripper Jacc
Me mum always said I had a sharp eye. My mom says my farts plague with disease!

Ripper Jacc
Wow! Talk about a self-esteem builder!

Scythe
Everytime I drop a pigeon, a small baby giggles!

Ripper Jacc
I literally fell from my chair laughing at that one...

Scythe
The people at the FCC and at KFC do too.

Ripper Jacc
And then the demon mongoloid babies all shit a napalm onto the grassy plains of Timbuktu.

Scythe
The reason Paris Hilton says "That's Hot" is because if she says it enough times, ths sky will rip open and out come a demon on horseback, but his job will not be to destroy, kill or plague, but rather to deflower all of us, those that have already been, will be reflowered.

Dark-Jaxx
That's friggin awesome. Reminds me of that "Numa Numan Hentai" vid on Newgrounds.

Ripper Jacc
Heheh, I thought it was because it burned her tiny-ass brain to think above the level of a sea anemone.

Kosta
Originally posted by Ripper Jacc
I love that pic. The cat looks so comfortable up there, and the goat looks stoned all to Hell.

Goats always look stoned, and they're almost always chewing on something. Goats are the stoners of the animal kingdom, along with sloths. That makes them cool in my book stick out tongue.

Scythe
Originally posted by Kosta
Goats always look stoned, and they're almost always chewing on something. Goats are the stoners of the animal kingdom, along with sloths. That makes them cool in my book stick out tongue.

This is true.

Ripper Jacc
Goats are perhaps the most awesome of animals, however, never let one undermine the equal awesomeness of a white tiger.

Scythe
Originally posted by Ripper Jacc
Goats are perhaps the most awesome of animals, however, never let one undermine the equal awesomeness of a white tiger.

White tigers are very awesome. Haha, but you can't eat them.... legally

Ripper Jacc
>.>

Have you been setting cameras in the cafetorium of the... I... mean... er... No, of course not. you can't eat them... >.>

Ripper Jacc
Have you noticed people seem to avoid this place like the Plague? It's a phenomenon.

Scythe
Nah, they'll come eventually.

Check out what I did today! Rargh!

Originally posted by Scythe
Dead tired. We had a scavenger hunt today through out the entire college campus, and my teamates couldn't show up. So it was just me running all the errends gathering all the items, I'm hardcore, because even though it was just me by myself, I came in second place out of ten four-person groups. Four of those groups had like the school's best athletes, so yeah....OH MY!

Originally posted by Scythe
Ahaha, that's what I've been saying! Towards the end, when all we had to do was drop our envelope with all our gathered shit in a big box, I like tripped my bud Nathan thinking he had his team's envelope, but I was wrong, and my other bud Adrian popped his team's shit in. Goddamn it! I had to toss mine hoping it'd land in there, which it did, then I drank an ice cold Cherry Coke, success!

I'm proud of myself, if you wanna be proud of me too, it's okay, I'll allow it, there-there, there-there, I understand, anything for me!

Ripper Jacc
That is f*cking awesome. I've never known of anyone who could keep up with four-person groups that well...

Scythe
I feel accomplished, f*ck you nay-saying fortune cookies!

Ripper Jacc
The squirrels! They've returned for my nuts, just as the leprechauns are after me Lucky Charms!

Scythe
You have rodents after your nuts?! Uh oh!

Ripper Jacc
And midgets after my charms... It is such a bloody awful evening...

Scythe
Ahahahahaha! It's like you visited my local desert town.

Ripper Jacc
I very well may have... Were there trees made of Cheddar in the forest a few miles out?

Scythe
Not unless the drugs got to ya.

Ripper Jacc
Damn, they're bad for that.

Scythe
Haha, that's what the filthy hobos of Barstow say.

Ripper Jacc
I wonder if you might know, how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris?

Scythe
Originally posted by Ripper Jacc
I wonder if you might know, how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris?

I have no clue, only things I know are how to make an ostrich sing "Hello my baby" when you tickle its genitals.

Ripper Jacc
Interesting... I thought that was only an urban legend...

Scythe
Babeh, I'm an urban legend, teeheez

Ripper Jacc
I wish I was teh urban legendz...

Scythe
Someday, I'll make you one...

Might've sounded gay...

Ripper Jacc
That would be... awesome!

Yeh, just a little... and I don't think I helped it any...

Scythe
Thanks God for spoiler tags.

Ripper Jacc
I agree. Now they'll never know what we were saying...

Scythe
Not in a million years.

Ripper Jacc
We're just awesome like that.

Scythe

Ripper Jacc

Scythe

Ripper Jacc
Got to go this evening, we'll finish this later...

Scythe
The hell you are!!

Ripper Jacc
The Hell? Any way I cut it, you've won...

Scythe
Damn Straight! I win! Okay, let's go again!

Ripper Jacc
I've got twenty minutes.

Scythe
I'm outta time, post and I'll be back.

Ripper Jacc
It's all good, Scythe. I'll try to be here later, but if I'm not, go ahead and make your move.

Sol Valentine
eek!

Ripper Jacc
Sol, nice of you to drop in. You'd be our first visitor in pages. How are things?

Sol Valentine
Things are good, high school is pretty fun, besides the long ride. laughing out loud

How're things with Mr. Jacc?

Ripper Jacc
All well, I suppose. Working out a means to and from classes, but otherwise, all is well.

Sol Valentine
Good to hear. yes

Ripper Jacc
The Sakura on my avvy and both our sigs is being drawn on one of my class folders right now. I'm trying my hand at it before I go off and have a guy tattoo it on me. I rather think it fitting, if I change the hair color to a darker blonde, and add a scroll beneath, as a tribute to Kit.


EDIT: But keep quiet about it, she can't find out until it's been done. wink

Sol Valentine
Originally posted by Ripper Jacc
The Sakura on my avvy and both our sigs is being drawn on one of my class folders right now. I'm trying my hand at it before I go off and have a guy tattoo it on me. I rather think it fitting, if I change the hair color to a darker blonde, and add a scroll beneath, as a tribute to Kit.


EDIT: But keep quiet about it, she can't find out until it's been done. wink

Dude, that shit is so f*cking badass.

Ripper Jacc
I know, right? Thinking of having the outfit done in blue, too, rather than Sakura-Chan's pinkish outfit.

Sol Valentine
Awesome!

Ripper Jacc
Originally posted by Ripper Jacc
The Sakura on my avvy and both our sigs is being drawn on one of my class folders right now. I'm trying my hand at it before I go off and have a guy tattoo it on me. I rather think it fitting, if I change the hair color to a darker blonde, and add a scroll beneath, as a tribute to Kit.


EDIT: But keep quiet about it, she can't find out until it's been done. wink

I just realized, that may not have been the most subtle way to leak that information to the internet. hmm

Scythe
How come the Sakura in Sol's sig is wearing mesh underneath her bra thingy, but the one in Jacc's isn't?

Also:

Sol Valentine
Originally posted by Ripper Jacc
I just realized, that may not have been the most subtle way to leak that information to the internet. hmm

Well at least we don't know how to contact Kit. hmm

Ripper Jacc
Er... no, but she is a member here on KMC, so... if ever she stumbles upon this thread... We are all quite screwed, now. Unless I can turn it into one of those "I was just kidding" things and then spring it on her later on as a surprise, but I would never do that. He said in case she was reading this...

I used a different pic for mine, Scythe. Apparently mine was the unedited. Who knows?

Sol Valentine
Originally posted by Scythe
How come the Sakura in Sol's sig is wearing mesh underneath her bra thingy, but the one in Jacc's isn't?

Also:





lulz, bra thingy

Originally posted by Ripper Jacc
Er... no, but she is a member here on KMC, so... if ever she stumbles upon this thread... We are all quite screwed, now. Unless I can turn it into one of those "I was just kidding" things and then spring it on her later on as a surprise, but I would never do that. He said in case she was reading this...

I used a different pic for mine, Scythe. Apparently mine was the unedited. Who knows?





I can take the blunt of the attack for you srug

Scythe
I see, unedited ftw, but Sol is cool, so yeah... Hee!

Ripper Jacc
Originally posted by Sol Valentine
lulz, bra thingy



I can take the blunt of the attack for you srug

I'm afraid, Sol, I cannot put you in harm's way like that... Trust me, it's for the best if I take the full of it. It'll be worth it in the long run. stick out tongue

EDIT:





Scythe, you keep sneaking your replies in, heheh.

Sol Valentine
Originally posted by Scythe
I see, unedited ftw, but Sol is cool, so yeah... Hee!





Woo!!!

Scythe is goatsome!

Originally posted by Ripper Jacc
I'm afraid, Sol, I cannot put you in harm's way like that... Trust me, it's for the best if I take the full of it. It'll be worth it in the long run. stick out tongue

EDIT:





Scythe, you keep sneaking your replies in, heheh.

Be careful out there. sad

Ripper Jacc
Originally posted by Sol Valentine
Woo!!!

Scythe is goatsome!



Be careful out there. sad

Oh, naturally. I know how to make her get over it. It's not too hard, once you figure it out, but still... I'd rather not have to go there at all...

Sol Valentine
Originally posted by Ripper Jacc
Oh, naturally. I know how to make her get over it. It's not too hard, once you figure it out, but still... I'd rather not have to go there at all...

Oh boy. o.o

Scythe
Originally posted by Ripper Jacc
Scythe, you keep sneaking your replies in, heheh.

I work like that.





None of us won this one. Next one!!

Ripper Jacc
Someone will eventually win...

Scythe

Ripper Jacc

Sol Valentine
eek!

Scythe
Ah squirtz son!

Ripper Jacc
Heya, Sol. How's things?

Sol Valentine
Things are good, just looking over some notes.

You?

Scythe

Ripper Jacc
As well as can be expected, Sol. Trying to help an old friend regain access to his old account on KMC. He's forgotten his old password, and the email address he joined with is no longer valid, so I'm trying to give him a hand in trying to figure out the password. -.-' He's decided to PM Raz with a new account and see if he'll help. Let's not all hold our breath...

Sol Valentine
Originally posted by Ripper Jacc




As well as can be expected, Sol. Trying to help an old friend regain access to his old account on KMC. He's forgotten his old password, and the email address he joined with is no longer valid, so I'm trying to give him a hand in trying to figure out the password. -.-' He's decided to PM Raz with a new account and see if he'll help. Let's not all hold our breath...

lulz

Scythe
Key, next one Jacc, and this time.....it's personal....

Ripper Jacc
Personal? Hm, alright. Then I suppose I'd best play my cards right, eh?

Sol Valentine
eek!

Scythe
Dun Dun Dun!

Ripper Jacc
Wanana!

Sol Valentine
eek!

Ripper Jacc
Sol! Mah CD burner is f*cked up!

Scythe

Ripper Jacc

Sol Valentine
Originally posted by Ripper Jacc
Sol! Mah CD burner is f*cked up!

WHAT?!?!?!?

Ripper Jacc
The Lightscribe burner I have on mah computer, she won't burn an image correctly! It's like... They're TRYING to keep me from getting that one to work, after all the trouble it took us to figure it out...

Sol Valentine
That sucks big time. sad

Ripper Jacc
Well, I've got Jason coming over later to see if he can fix it. After hacking those antivirus databases for me, I think it should be good by this evening, but... I may have to just buy a new one. Which is on hold until I get a fresh car, naturally.

Sol Valentine
Good luck. yes

Ripper Jacc
Thanks. I'm hoping it gets going soon...

Sol Valentine
Awesome!

Scythe
Rargh!

Scythe
How's everyone doin' today?

Ripper Jacc
Damnit, another win-less game...

Well, I suppose I'm alright, Scythe, and yourself?

Scythe
Good ta hear, mhmm. Hmm, I was wondering, why do bank drive-up tellers have braile?

Ripper Jacc
It's a good question. I mean, blind people can't drive up and use them, nor would they walk up to them... It's a conspiracy, if you ask me.

Sol Valentine
wave

Ripper Jacc
How ya doin', Sol?

Sol Valentine
Great, just eating!

You?

Ripper Jacc
Not bad.

Sol Valentine
Good, good.

Ripper Jacc
Little tired. Slept in until like 2pm today.

Sol Valentine
I almost fell asleep about 10 times first period today.

Ripper Jacc
Boring class?

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