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Jesus (Passion of the Christ version) finally comes back and is appalled at the destruction caused by Godzilla in New York.

Finally after 2,000 odd years of waiting Christianity's main man comes to show us a bit of that "Take up your swords" stuff he was on about towards the end.

He is allowed also the resurrection of his crack team: The disciples.
To assist him in the combat, they can be armed with what Broderick's boys had in the movies..

Godzilla immediately assumes that the JC Posse are there to f**k with it's young.

Its New York, its raining and its ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thor comes down and declares the battle "Lame" and re-nails Jesus using Mjolnir.

Thor is toasted imeeeeeeeeeeeeediately by firebreath that has bits of fisheads in it. Which of course might singe his lame hair.

Seriously though... Faced with Godzilla as his enemy, "What would Jesus do...?"

Die.

Jesus pwns everyone, McClane and Swagger included, Yes, even NJO Skywalker. All at the same time.

Originally posted by AngryManatee
Thor comes down and declares the battle "Lame"

Originally posted by AngryManatee
and re-nails Jesus using Mjolnir.

Jesus LOL's and ***** slaps Godzilla into hell.

Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
Jesus pwns everyone, McClane and Swagger included, Yes, even NJO Skywalker. All at the same time.

Hmmmmmmmmmmmm.

What onscreen feats are there to back that up...?

Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
Jesus LOL's and ***** slaps Godzilla into hell.

Where is his hellslap demonstrated on screen...?

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Hmmmmmmmmmmmm.

What onscreen feats are there to back that up...? I didnt start the thread.

I know...

But it's the Jesus, baby. The Jesus.

"The Jesus"....



Wasnt he that Bowler/child molestor from "The Big Lebowski"...?

Dude, it's God. You can't fuk with God.

If Jesus wanted to he could spawn an Army of Bruce lee's and you just don't fuk with that kind of power.

Different Jesus haermm

Like me and John Gacy are both John, get it?

Originally posted by jinXed by JaNx
Dude, it's God. You can't fuk with God.

If Jesus wanted to he could spawn an Army of Bruce lee's and you just don't fuk with that kind of power.

Where is this shown on screen...?

(And in RL for that matter lolz Now you should know better than most that that was an old Centurion concept lolz)

Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
Different Jesus haermm

Like me and John Gacy are both John, get it?

and you probably are both mass murderers too lolz

More fanboys delving into the EU Jesus and trying to get a win, sad. Movie feats only, bitches.

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
and you probably are both mass murderers too lolz Yeah well, the fuzzy peanut fairy told me that the dogs are my master.

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Where is this shown on screen...?



Well, it's not shown because the purpose of the movie was to watch Christ being tortured, willingly. If he weren't such a cool dude though, you can be sure that he would have summoned a few Bruce Lee's and maybe an optimus prime to bust his ass out.

It's God, dude, his powers are only limited to the imagination.

Yeah...? I challenge him to prove his existance by somehow stopping me from posting the word "Poop" as my next post.

Poop.



















Anyways, unless it was on screen, its all EU.

Originally posted by jinXed by JaNx


It's God, dude, his powers are only limited to the imagination.

Or by those who imagined God.

Exactamundo.

Godzilla shows up with a hammer, two pieces of wood, and three nails.

Game over.

Okay, to make this more interesting, "Ten Commandments" Jesus...?

How would he fare against the Lizard...?

All on screen feats considered...

Jesus is Jesus, dude. He would prolly sick his angels on godzilla.

Originally posted by Impediment
Godzilla shows up with a hammer, two pieces of wood, and three nails.

Game over.

LOL

"And Lo... For Godzilla was also a bit tasty at carpentry."

Jesus might be good at amassing piles of fish to lure Godzilla in with, I guess........

Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
Jesus is Jesus, dude. He would prolly sick his angels on godzilla.

More EU speculation.

His ability to part tides, might come in handy, I guess, making it hard to hide underwater, for Godzilla.....

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
More EU specualtion. Reality, holmes. They'd rain sulphur on godzilla while they kick back sipping a banana daquiri.

Reality....? Prove it.

You arent looking at it properly. I believe in Jesus. I believe in the bible, so it's reality to me.

To a non believer, think of Jesus as a fantasy character, like godzilla, and all of his feats as fantasy.

Fair enough. Thats most honest/clear....

I am. Now you can probably better name his on screen feats then.

Go for it.

In fact, I'll give you free pick of any ability in any movie he is in.

Dude I aint gonan touch that one haermm

Why not...?

(Not pressuring you to, just curious as to why not.. is it because you arent up on the movies, or what...?)

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Why not...?

(Not pressuring you to, just curious as to why not.. is it because you arent up on the movies, or what...?) OK....Who is God? What is God capable of?

Both are questions that no one can agree on.

Besides, its probably irrelevant....

Its "Jesus as depicted on screen" that Im on about.

"Jesus as depicted onscreen" entails who he is as a mortal and a deity.

Uh, guys......if this turns into a theological debate, I'm closing this.

Prolly a good idea.

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth






Anyways, unless it was on screen, its all EU.


No way man. The Bible is not EU.

Otherwise, what is the point of pitting Christ against Godzilla? Christ was simply a man in, The Passion of the Christ. The thread starts after Christ returned from Death, right? If so, that is definitely apart of the EU (the Bible)

... this is a joke thread.

Originally posted by Impediment
Uh, guys......if this turns into a theological debate, I'm closing this.

It's the fanboys bringing in non-movie EU shit again.

While I am respectful of theists, you have to remember: I'm an atheist.

Not to mention, this can turn bad. Quickly.

I wish only to debate film feats here, so the Bible, from that view point is EU.

Im not caining it, there are plenty of threads for that in other sections.

As I said, feel free to cite and on screen feats.

Actually, the Bible came first. So if anything the Bible is the Directors Commentary, which actually is a higher canon then the movie itself.

What the commentary says and what the directors say is always higher than the movie is in terms of canon.

Geez....

OK....

Lets say a thread is started about Jesse James (the outlaw) and another outlaw from the movies. Well, we all know James is like the best train robber ever, right? And lets say the Jesse James movie in question never shows him robbing a train. Does this mean he has no skills in train robbing?

This dude rules



No seriously, though. This is like one of them there matrix threads. Stupid and pointless. If you take away the Bible, Christ has NO abilities(give him the Bible he is God). From what we saw in the movie, Christ is nothing more than a human. We didn't see him do anything in, "the Passion of the CHrist", except die.

You may as well have picked one of the extra's and said "that guy, who was standing behind jesus in that one scene and ten other guys VS Godzilla. I mean, dude, what did you envision happening?

Besides, Godzilla aint be gonna wreckin on Jesus. Godzilla gonna stomp up to Jesus and Jesus gonna be all like "yo, whats happenin my brother, why you so mad, homie?" and after Godzilla gives few "ROARS" Jesus gonna be all "Aight, mang, listen...,how about Japan you can have Japan thats big enough for you, isn't it?" Then Godzilla all be like "roar" Jesus turns to the crowd and translates, "hell yes, that shit is mo than big enough, you da man Jesus givin me an entire country all to myself and shit" Godzilla then stomps away. Jesus then snickers "man, first thing i need to do after i die is call them japanese and tell them to move somewhere else"

Is this Jesus Prime or is this post-crisis Christ?

Jesus from hamlet 2 wins

Originally posted by Final Blaxican
Actually, the Bible came first. So if anything the Bible is the Directors Commentary, which actually is a higher canon then the movie itself.

What the commentary says and what the directors say is always higher than the movie is in terms of canon.

The spiderman comics came first before any movie, yet they are considered EU in here.

Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
Geez....

OK....

Lets say a thread is started about Jesse James (the outlaw) and another outlaw from the movies. Well, we all know James is like the best train robber ever, right? And lets say the Jesse James movie in question never shows him robbing a train. Does this mean he has no skills in train robbing?

Yes, for all that matters in these threads.

On screen feats only.

Originally posted by dadudemon
Is this Jesus Prime or is this post-crisis Christ?

Thats the spirit lolz

Originally posted by jinXed by JaNx
This dude rules



No seriously, though. This is like one of them there matrix threads. Stupid and pointless. If you take away the Bible, Christ has NO abilities(give him the Bible he is God). From what we saw in the movie, Christ is nothing more than a human. We didn't see him do anything in, "the Passion of the CHrist", except die.

You may as well have picked one of the extra's and said "that guy, who was standing behind jesus in that one scene and ten other guys VS Godzilla. I mean, dude, what did you envision happening?


A serious epic battle.

Doesnt jesus kick ass in other films...?

Originally posted by jinXed by JaNx

No seriously, though. This is like one of them there matrix threads. Stupid and pointless. If you take away the Bible, Christ has NO abilities(give him the Bible he is God). From what we saw in the movie, Christ is nothing more than a human. We didn't see him do anything in, "the Passion of the CHrist", except die.



Na, he took a serious beat-down, in fact, most any other man would have succumbed to death from the pain and blood-loss; he also did it while keeping his spirits up. That's a feat.

Agreed. Almost McClanian in its endurance.

Almost.

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
A serious epic battle.

Doesnt jesus kick ass in other films...?

We're not talking about other films. We're talking about, "The Passion of the Christ". In that movie, Jesus displayed nothing. In fact, it wasn't even shown that he was, in fact, the son of God. He was just some guy being crucified.

What was it that you saw in "the Passion of the Christ" (if you're disregarding the Bible) that led you to believe this would be an epic battle?

They hinted at his resurrection at the end, so unless you think Mel was making him out to be Lazarus, it's implied he's Jesus-God.

Originally posted by dadudemon
Is this Jesus Prime or is this post-crisis Christ? LMFAO

Buncha heathens.

Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
Buncha heathens.

Probably, but the guy who laughs at retards and the crippled shouldn't be 'casting the first stone', at least Jesus said you shouldn't.

Originally posted by Robtard
Probably, but the guy who laughs at retards and the crippled shouldn't be 'casting the first stone', at least Jesus said you shouldn't. I laugh at fictional retards and cripples, not in real life. I do have a little class.

Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
I laugh at fictional retards and cripples, not in real life. I do have a little class.

John Merrick was a real person, sir.

Originally posted by Robtard
John Merrick was a real person, sir. Your avatar looks funny.

Originally posted by Robtard
John Merrick was a real person, sir.

As was Rocky's mother, who RJ said he was glad was a 'dead b*tch'.

Originally posted by jinXed by JaNx
We're not talking about other films. We're talking about, "The Passion of the Christ". In that movie, Jesus displayed nothing. In fact, it wasn't even shown that he was, in fact, the son of God. He was just some guy being crucified.

What was it that you saw in "the Passion of the Christ" (if you're disregarding the Bible) that led you to believe this would be an epic battle?

Heheheee you have a point, at the beginning it was just POTC feats, but having considered the very point that you mention, I threw it open to all movie feats considered, and he is an active character in many a movie, Im sure over history.

Partings of seas and other feats like that, along with his endurance initially pricked my ears up to the prospect of epicness.

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
As was Rocky's mother, who RJ said he was glad was a 'dead b*tch'. Never said that.

I know.

Thats why they werent quotation marks, I was obviously paraphrasing you.

You called her whore, then when I pointed out that she had died, your response was "RIP Whore".
http://www.killermovies.com/forums/showthread.php?threadid=503590&pagenumber=1

(See? I used actual quotation marks that time, because that was a direct quote)

Sorry.

Well its Jesus I'd be worried about, he liked the sick, the afflicted, hung with the alchoholics, the drug addicts and the lepers.
Next time asking yourself "What would Jesus do" could be the hell-avoiding way, according to christian beliefs, am I right..?

Now anyways, have you collected anymore feats for JC in this faceoff, yet...? Or have you given up on your main man already...?

Jesus can have his disciples in fully armed Helicopters, if you like...

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Well its Jesus I'd be worried about, he liked the sick, the afflicted, hung with the alchoholics, the drug addicts and the lepers.
Next time asking yourself "What would Jesus do" could be the hell-avoiding way, according to christian beliefs, am I right..?

Now anyways, have you collected anymore feats for JC in this faceoff, yet...? Or have you given up on your main man already...?

Jesus can have his disciples in fully armed Helicopters, if you like...

I thought about it. I am not gonna discuss Jesus in a versus thread, It's disrespectful, IMO. Call it what you want, it just doesn't sit right with me.

Then thats fair enough.

Since you also saw that "RIP Whore" was a tremendously disrespectful thing to say and you apologised, that won't be taken as hypocrisy.

We are only talking about movie representations.
But if thats not your bag, then groovy.

When it comes to a theological figure, it can become pretty touchy, if you ask me.


However, I'm of the opinion that if you subscribe to said theological practices, it'd be better to just be non-involved.

All respect included.

I Agree.

That definitely strikes me as the most balanced way of looking at it.

This is why I wont slate RJ for no longer participating in it.
Definitely no shame there.

Religious figures like you say are a tricky one, but like wise if we tiptoe round the subject forever/give too much power to any subscribed theology, it becomes like a 'cartoon Muhammad outrage' situation everytime someone says something even 2% less than the 110% levels of respect they expect for their held belief.
And thats why its good to have the occasional thread like this.
I can laugh at atheism/agnosticism for example:

"What does an athesist scream when they climax?" gags etc are all welcome....

'Cause you got to have a laugh, havent you...?
And Im not on a mission, despite my personal beliefs, to have a go at anyone's chosen idol, Ive not come out all like "F*** Jesus" or "F*** Muhammad" or anything here....

Im just saying "How would the movie version get on in a fight with Godzilla."

And im listed as Jedi in religion parts of forms everywhere.

And there are plenty of Star Wars versus threads in here.

Originally posted by Robtard
They hinted at his resurrection at the end, so unless you think Mel was making him out to be Lazarus, it's implied he's Jesus-God.

. The Bible is not EU material because you can't have the, "the Passion" without the rest of the story. Without the rest of the story, "the Passion" is just some guy being crucified.

Isnt it covered in other movies though...?
You can use that, if so.

Basically the sum of all his powers in cinematic history.

The rest of the bible (Unless it has been covered in another movie) is EU, there are more SW novels than there are movies. And the non-movie stuff has to be disregarded in these threads as EU.

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
The spiderman comics came first before any movie, yet they are considered EU in here.

The movies aren't based off the comics, to the point where nearly all the same diologue is even used.

Both movie and comic Uncle Ben's say: "With great power comes great responsibility".

Yeah, there's that 'dickness' back at ya.

Ohhhh yeah.

Originally posted by Robtard
Both movie and comic Uncle Ben's say: "With great power comes great responsibility".

Yeah, there's that 'dickness' back at ya.

You're fired.

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Thats the spirit lolz

Indeed

Jesus Prime is during his primary ministry on Earth. Post-Crisis Christ is after the resurrection.



To take it more seriously, PC Christ should actually be quite awesome. He can FLY! and He's immortal.

However, Jesus Prime actually raised the dead and cured incurable diseases. He healed Peter's ear right back on. However, he has no pwn feats...just, for lack of a better term, Christ-like feats.


So, to take it more seriously, Jesus wins by healing Godzilla's broken heart. He calms his spirit and they become friends. Then, Jesus turns 5 fishes into 5000 and Godzilla falls asleep with a full tummy. Hoooray! (Wow, that was such a little kid story that I just told. I am ashamed.)

Originally posted by Publius II
LMFAO

"The Passion" Jesus gets beaten and crucified, thus guilt-tripping Godzilla into ending his rampage.

He died for a radioactively mutated lizard's sins, in this case then lolz.

Wow thats a lot of destruction to have to atone for.

dude, this is stupid. no one beat Jesus. neither Superboy Prime or Anti-Monitor. NO ONE.

Even if Jesus got owned, he'll just call his father for help and he'll smite Godzilla.

Actually the Romans/Jews did. On screen. Many times over.
Their screen feats are well in order.

Maybe he could do that... Has he been shown onscreen displaying this power...?

Maybe he could....Unless it was the will of god for his son to die (again), this time at the 'hands' of Godzilla.

Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Actually the Romans/Jews did. On screen. Many times over.
Their screen feats are well in order.

Maybe he could do that... Has he been shown onscreen displaying this power...?

Maybe he could....Unless it was the will of god for his son to die (again), this time at the 'hands' of Godzilla.

you are stupid enough for making this thread. everyone knows that Jesus is a God and omnipotent. except if this is your own version of Jesus, I won't debate again.

Stupid...? Nope.

Its the (any) movie version of Jesus vs Godzilla.

They aren't omnipotent anyways.
Unless of course the devil's work is gods work/permitted by god anyhow.

Thanks for the flame though.