Pumpkin fu*ker

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geshien
A article in the Washington Post titled: "Best Comeback Line Ever."

In summary, the police arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22-year-old white male, resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38 p.m. on Friday.

Lawrence will be charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency and public intoxication at the Gwinnett County courthouse on Monday.

The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch he decided to stop. "You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside and there was no one around here for miles. At least I thought there wasn't," he stated in a phone interview.

Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it and proceeded to satisfy his alleged "need."

"I guess I was just really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment. In the process, Lawrence apparently failed to notice a Gwinnett County police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until officer Brenda Taylor approached him.

"It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said officer Taylor.
"I walked up to (Lawrence) and he's...just working away at this pumpkin."

Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Lawrence.

"I just went up and said, 'Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?'

He froze and was clearly very surprised that I was there and then looked me straight in the face and said,




"A pumpkin? Damn...is it midnight already?"

Rogue Jedi
wApXFrZC-sM&NR=1

GCG
Should have grabbed the pumpkin and drove home with it. I would'nt like to be the guy who eats that pumkin after its been poked and inseminated

Captain REX
All I have to say is that it happened at 11:38pm. OMG STAR WARS REFERENCE.

you get thorns
Dude uses grapes! embarrasment

alicia111
Originally posted by you get thorns
Dude uses grapes! embarrasment

big grin big grin big grin right on time smile

steverules_2
I guess all he needed was some TLC

Smallville

Bardock42
...Dracula, Georgia?


no expression

Nivvy
He wishes it was midnight....

Kostabot
Who can resist a sexy pumpkin?

jinXed by JaNx
I always wondered what else one could use a Pumpkin for aside from making Jakolanterns and pie.

now i know erm

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