Worst Three-quel Ever (OUCH)

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Has anybody else read this?

and this:



well. that sucked.

I just think the third is really bad... but it kinda is a really bad three-quel... *sigh*

I can't believe I'm saying this.

Actually, I agree with most of what it says. I know, you should all take me out and stone me to death, but the only reason I will tolerate AWE is because I love the characters and want to know what happens to them.

It's not that it's a bad movie and DMC is actually a pretty good movie despite what the article says, but there is way, way too much going on. T&T have said that they would finish writing scenes minutes before they would be filmed and were rushed. That's no excuse for professional writers, but think of all the time they had between COTBP and DMC. They could take their time, really think about what was going on, and actually create a tight plot within a 100% character-driven movie. It was a darker, more introspective step from COTBP, which is what the second movie in a trilogy is supposed to be. The third movie is supposed to close things up and give us resolution. AWE did not do that because it's too confusing and some things are just plain left out. While the Brethren Court is kind of a cool idea, it probably should have been scrapped because being an organized bureaucracy is supposed to be what pirates are against. Just my thoughts.

I have to say that I didn't really like DMC or AWE. They, well....they were kind of boring.

DMC is really good in my opinion! I just can't see how people think it's boring.. huh

I agree with you about AWE, Willo. I tolerate it. There are a few scenes I love but... all together it's a horrible mess..

Exactly. Like the opening scene? Great, very creepy. Ditto to the scene where we first meet Sao Feng...back when we actually thought he'd get to do something. The Locker is okay. I was hoping for a more psychological interpretation, though, and something that would really make the Locker seem BAD/HELLISH rather than somewhat funny (and sexy since Jack is shirtless in it). Up until they point their guns at each other, it's nothing but exposition and things that don't make any sense.

AND THEN...and then...sigh. Will goes all piratey? Isn't that so out of character from his stance in COTBP? Did the writers not see how offended he was when Jack asked him if he was turning pirate and how much of a shock it was to Will that all the things he was doing to save Elizabeth were actually acts of piracy? Well, after his blonde moment has passed, Elizabeth gets the blondest moment out of anyone and willingly goes with Sao Feng? What did she think was going to happen? I have no idea how someone as evil as a would-be rapist could have so little to do, but AWE managed to pull that one off.

Jack Davenport must be losing sleep on deciding to be in the last part of the POTC series. Norrington is wasted. He was put to such good use in DMC and we got to see a whole new side of him. I was looking forward to him doing something just as unexpected and life-changing in AWE. Instead, I watch him have about ten minutes of screen time and DIE!

And then the pirates have an organized union? Awful. Sorry. It's really cool that Jack's dad is Keeper of the Code and that Jack votes Elizabeth King and she decides to fight and all that, but it makes no sense. You can almost hear a club president pounding his gavel above all the talking and arguing.

Parley is cool, one of the best scenes. And the final battle is very good, too, all up until the bittersweet ending that left no one happy. The willabethers basically got that ship dangled in their face and then pulled away from them. The sparrabethers got nothing, and the norribethers got a pretty hot, beautiful unrequited kiss. Something's wrong there. Speaking of kisses, I can almost hear T&T discussing the script.

Terry: Um, I can't think of what else we need to explain! What else should we do?

Ted: I don't know! I don't know!

Terry: (slaps him) Get a hold of yourself! We have to think of something.

Ted: Let's have Elizabeth kiss someone!

Terry: Good idea! And then we'll kill them!

Ted: Whew! Glad that's over. I feel calm now. Won't we lose our entire cast, though?

Terry: Nah. We'll just have Will come back as a literally heartless immortal psychopomp that will turn out to be a deadbeat dad just like his own dad was and never ever get to be with his one true love.

Ted: It's a love story for the ages.

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