Dead Michael Jackson jokes!

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lord xyz
Lets face it, the last time he was this stiff was when Macaully Culkin spent the night at Neverland Ranch.

And the nurses are unsure about what to do with the body. Since the plastic recycling bins don't go out til Thursday.

It'd be great if they melted him down and molded him into lego. So kids can play with him for a change.



His death is tragic, and he probably never touched children, but jokes are there and they're funny. Come share all your (Dead) Micheal Jackson jokes.

After all, the Steve Irwin, Heath Ledger and Pope jokes were great. Now it's Jacko's turn.

Slay
There were Heath Ledger jokes?

Mr. Rhythmic
Actually, there WERE no good dead Steve Irwin or dead Heath Ledger jokes. Why? Because all of the smart people were smart enough to understand how inappropriate they are.

Rogue Jedi

~Wlshy~
you are sick uhuh

Piggle Humsy

Alpha Centauri
Originally posted by Mr. Rhythmic
Actually, there WERE no good dead Steve Irwin or dead Heath Ledger jokes. Why? Because all of the smart people were smart enough to understand how inappropriate they are.

Nobody is excluded from jokes.

As huge a fan as I was of Jackson, he is no exception. I just don't participate in the jokes. Because it's above me.

Originally posted by Piggle Humsy
In memory of MJ’s death, McDonald’s is coming out with the new “McJackson”. It’s 50 year old meat between 12 year old buns.

He died at 50, technically the child abuse wouldn't have occured when he was 50. So...the joke kinda falls at the first hurdle.

-AC

Rogue Jedi
I didnt make them up no

Piggle Humsy
Originally posted by Alpha Centauri
Nobody is excluded from jokes.

As huge a fan as I was of Jackson, he is no exception. I just don't participate in the jokes. Because it's above me.



He died at 50, technically the child abuse wouldn't have occured when he was 50. So...the joke kinda falls at the first hurdle.

-AC

Shut your face! uhuh

Also, he didn't die the day he turned 50 did he.. awehawe

Alpha Centauri
Originally posted by Piggle Humsy
Shut your face! uhuh

Also, he didn't die the day he turned 50 did he.. awehawe

No, I'm just pissing on your bonfire.

It's what I do, I bust balls.

Hey, I'm Alpha Centauri.

-AC

Piggle Humsy
Originally posted by Alpha Centauri
No, I'm just pissing on your bonfire.

It's what I do, I bust balls.

Hey, I'm Alpha Centauri.

-AC

I know and I luf ya for it awesome

Alpha Centauri
Originally posted by Piggle Humsy
I know and I luf ya for it awesome

Yeah, but you've had the influence of someone else. Oh yes, I know.

I know. I know all.

-AC

Piggle Humsy
Originally posted by Alpha Centauri
Yeah, but you've had the influence of someone else. Oh yes, I know.

I know. I know all.

-AC

Actually I luf'd you before that aweroll

C. C. Cowgirl!
I hate myself for finding some of these funny no expression

Piggle Humsy
I heard Michael Jackson died of food poisoning from eating a 5 year old wiener.

lord xyz
Originally posted by Alpha Centauri
Nobody is excluded from jokes.

As huge a fan as I was of Jackson, he is no exception. I just don't participate in the jokes. Because it's above me.



He died at 50, technically the child abuse wouldn't have occured when he was 50. So...the joke kinda falls at the first hurdle.

-AC How do you know he didn't molest people when he was 50?

Okay, I get that you don't believe he molested at all, but if he molested, and got away with it, it's possible he didn't stop.

Slay
Originally posted by lord xyz
How do you know he didn't molest people when he was 50?

Okay, I get that you don't believe he molested at all, but if he molested, and got away with it, it's possible he didn't stop.
At least until he got enough.

Alpha Centauri
Sure, Piggle.

Sure.

Originally posted by lord xyz
How do you know he didn't molest people when he was 50?

Okay, I get that you don't believe he molested at all, but if he molested, and got away with it, it's possible he didn't stop.

Because I'd wager he wouldn't wanna risk it again.

-AC

Piggle Humsy
Originally posted by Alpha Centauri
Sure, Piggle.

Sure.

-AC

IT'S THE TRUTH I TELLS YA! ha-son

Rogue Jedi
You know, its funny. MJ dies and the world mourns, its all over the news. One of us dies? Nothing. Nothing at all. Not even a comment in the lifestyle section. What a ****ed up world.

Slay
Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
You know, its funny. MJ dies and the world mourns, its all over the news. One of us dies? Nothing. Nothing at all. Not even a comment in the lifestyle section. What a ****ed up world.
Well yeah, but then MJ was an icon who touched (no pun) the lives of millions. A lot of people, as you probably have seen on TV take his death as if someone close to them has died. Which warrants at least some media attention to his death.

Any of us are 'just' 'normal' people. I don't think or would expect that anyone in the UK would care about my death. Or any random person who lives in my city that I simply don't know for that matter, which is why my death won't get any media attention, except for maybe an obituary in the local newspaper.

It's not that difficult to fathom...

Piggle Humsy
Originally posted by Slay
Well yeah, but then MJ was an icon who touched (no pun) the lives of millions. A lot of people, as you probably have seen on TV take his death as if someone close to them has died. Which warrants at least some media attention to his death.

Any of us are 'just' 'normal' people. I don't think or would expect that anyone in the UK would care about my death. Or any random person who lives in my city that I simply don't know for that matter, which is why my death won't get any media attention, except for maybe an obituary in the local newspaper.

It's not that difficult to fathom...

Speak for yourself!

I'm not 'just' 'normal' mhm

I'm special ermhappy

smiley_abzw

Rogue Jedi
Originally posted by Slay
Well yeah, but then MJ was an icon who touched (no pun) the lives of millions. A lot of people, as you probably have seen on TV take his death as if someone close to them has died. Which warrants at least some media attention to his death.

Any of us are 'just' 'normal' people. I don't think or would expect that anyone in the UK would care about my death. Or any random person who lives in my city that I simply don't know for that matter, which is why my death won't get any media attention, except for maybe an obituary in the local newspaper.

It's not that difficult to fathom... Yeah I know, but why is his death "more important?" So he was the king of pop, big deal. Doesn't make his life more important than mine, or yours, or Bardocks, etc;

I get what you said and I agree with you 110%, but still, you know?

Alpha Centauri
Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
You know, its funny. MJ dies and the world mourns, its all over the news. One of us dies? Nothing. Nothing at all. Not even a comment in the lifestyle section. What a ****ed up world.

People should only mourn those who they care about or those who have affected them personally (Which, in my opinion, is the only reason you should care).

So, to answer this quote, and the one above; because millions and millions and millions, arguably billions of people, cared about Michael Jackson. Because he gave them something that enhanced their lives and made it more enjoyable. He sold a quarter of a billion albums and those albums seemingly have joy and happiness to all those who bought them.

Have any of us? No.

If you don't care, then I defend that. The reason this wouldn't happen for us is because we've not done anything to earn it.

The people who care for us would mourn us, and that's all we could and SHOULD ask for. Just like the people who care for Michael Jackson are mourning him. Well, there are bandwagoners, but there always are.

If it was a reality star, who had zero talent, I'd agree. It wasn't though. Stop trying to be cooly rebellious.

-AC

Slay
Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
Yeah I know, but why is his death "more important?" So he was the king of pop, big deal. Doesn't make his life more important than mine, or yours, or Bardocks, etc;

I get what you said and I agree with you 110%, but still, you know?
His death, is ''more important'' than ours, because he meant more (to a lot of people) than we do, as I said.

Alpha Centauri
Originally posted by Slay
His death, is ''more important'' than ours, because he meant more (to a lot of people) than we do, as I said.

RJ knows that, which is why I don't get any continuing questioning of the subject.

Even he doesn't, hence why he ended with "But still, ya know?".

No, we don't. Explain, RJ.

What additional issues do you have?

-AC

Rogue Jedi
Originally posted by Alpha Centauri
People should only mourn those who they care about or those who have affected them personally (Which, in my opinion, is the only reason you should care).

So, to answer this quote, and the one above; because millions and millions and millions, arguably billions of people, cared about Michael Jackson. Because he gave them something that enhanced their lives and made it more enjoyable. He sold a quarter of a billion albums and those albums seemingly have joy and happiness to all those who bought them.

Have any of us? No.

If you don't care, then I defend that. The reason this wouldn't happen for us is because we've not done anything to earn it.

The people who care for us would mourn us, and that's all we could and SHOULD ask for. Just like the people who care for Michael Jackson are mourning him. Well, there are bandwagoners, but there always are.

If it was a reality star, who had zero talent, I'd agree. It wasn't though. Stop trying to be cooly rebellious.

-AC Rebellious? Oooooooooook.....Just saying what's on my mind, is that a bad thing?

Your post and Slay's did put it in perspective for me though.

Mr. Rhythmic
Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
You know, its funny. MJ dies and the world mourns, its all over the news. One of us dies? Nothing. Nothing at all. Not even a comment in the lifestyle section. What a ****ed up world.

The amount of people shouldn't matter to you. It's your own feelings and impact from that person that count.

Piggle Humsy
This thread has really derailed from it's original intent.. awehuhs

Rogue Jedi
Why can't gerbils drive?
Hell, they can't even get out of Gere.

Impediment
How did Michael Jackson pick his nose?

Out of a catalog.

C. C. Cowgirl!
Originally posted by Piggle Humsy
This thread has really derailed from it's original intent.. awehuhs

And it didn't take long big grin

lord xyz
Originally posted by Impediment
How did Michael Jackson pick his nose?

Out of a catalog. That was a good one.

Rland
Originally posted by Piggle Humsy
This thread has really derailed from it's original intent.. awehuhs
GOOD!

More entertaining when drama ensues.

Piggle Humsy

Jaeh.is.Awesome
Originally posted by Piggle Humsy
This thread has really derailed from it's original intent.. awehuhs

it was just a matter of time.

Originally posted by lord xyz
That was a good one.

it was kind of funny.

occultdestroyer
Originally posted by Rogue Jedi

How can Batman defeat the Joker? With a handful of sleeping pills.
crylaugh

gefallen_engel
Originally posted by Impediment
How did Michael Jackson pick his nose?

Out of a catalog.

hanuts

occultdestroyer
News Flash:

Casper molested by The King of Pop.

occultdestroyer
Oh wait, I got a good one!


"Did Michael Jackson died?"

lord xyz
Day 96 and Jade Goody gets a new housemate...

Quincy
Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
You know, its funny. MJ dies and the world mourns, its all over the news. One of us dies? Nothing. Nothing at all. Not even a comment in the lifestyle section. What a ****ed up world.

It's because nobody knows or gives a shit about who the **** Rogue Jedi is.

lord xyz
We've already established RJ isn't as cool, interesting or remarkable as MJ.

Please go back to the jokes.

Piggle Humsy
haermm

Originally posted by lord xyz
Day 96 and Jade Goody gets a new housemate...

haermm

lord xyz
Michael Jackson actually killed himself to get closer to David Cameron's son.

This one I just made up.

Baylin
Following the death of Micheal Jackson all dates have been cancelled including Joe (aged 6) and Liam (aged 4)

Micheal Jackson has asked for his ashes to be put into an etcha sketch so kids can still play with him

Whats the difference between Alex Fergusion and Micheal Jackson?
Fergusion will still be playing giggs in august.

Reports of Micheal Jackson having a heart attack are false! He was found in the kids ward having a stroke...

Rogue Jedi
Originally posted by Quincy
It's because nobody knows or gives a shit about who the **** Rogue Jedi is. Dude, get off my dick.

That ACDC Chick
Originally posted by Baylin
Micheal Jackson has asked for his ashes to be put into an etcha sketch so kids can still play with him

Chris Tidus did that joke only with his father being put in the etch a sketch haermm

Alpha Centauri
Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
Dude, get off my dick.

It's true.

You could say the same about me or anybody. It's precisely why this death is getting publicity and ours won't.

-AC

That ACDC Chick
the most well ever get is a five second rememberance than a party

Rogue Jedi
Originally posted by Alpha Centauri
It's true.

You could say the same about me or anybody. It's precisely why this death is getting publicity and ours won't.

-AC I was kinda kidding around.

And I admitted a few posts ago that it was put into perspective for me.

Piggle Humsy
Originally posted by lord xyz
Michael Jackson actually killed himself to get closer to David Cameron's son.

This one I just made up.

It shows awehuhd

lord xyz
Originally posted by Piggle Humsy
It shows awehuhd I was reluctant to actually mention it was my joke, simply for that comment.

Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
Dude, get off my dick. That's an actual quote from Tom and Jerry the movie.

dadudemon
Originally posted by lord xyz
I was reluctant to actually mention it was my joke, simply for that comment.
Ahhh. Poor little dude...getting his feelings hurt. sad

lord xyz
Originally posted by dadudemon
Ahhh. Poor little dude...getting his feelings hurt. sad You. Are. A. Moron.

Bardock42
Originally posted by Mr. Rhythmic
Actually, there WERE no good dead Steve Irwin or dead Heath Ledger jokes. Why? Because all of the smart people were smart enough to understand how inappropriate they are. Oh, there were good Steve Irwin and Pope jokes, I haven't heard any Heath Ledger ones, probably cause the first two were ridiculous personalities in their life time....so....I guess MJ jokes make sense.

lord xyz
Originally posted by Bardock42
Oh, there were good Steve Irwin and Pope jokes, I haven't heard any Heath Ledger ones, probably cause the first two were ridiculous personalities in their life time....so....I guess MJ jokes make sense. RJ posted a whole bunch of Heath Ledger jokes.

He missed "What's that joker you'll be back? Somehow, I don't think so."

Bardock42
Originally posted by lord xyz
RJ posted a whole bunch of Heath Ledger jokes.

He missed "What's that joker you'll be back? Somehow, I don't think so."

Essential word was, indeed, "good".

dadudemon
Originally posted by lord xyz
You. Are. A. Moron.

Awwwww...Poor little guy, lashing out because his feelings are still hurt.


It's okay. Here's a popsicle, young man. That'll cheer you right up!

Rogue Jedi
Originally posted by dadudemon
Awwwww...Poor little guy, lashing out because his feelings are still hurt.


It's okay. Here's a popsicle, young man. That'll cheer you right up! Bewbz.

lord xyz
Originally posted by dadudemon
Awwwww...Poor little guy, lashing out because his feelings are still hurt.


It's okay. Here's a popsicle, young man. That'll cheer you right up! Wow. you must have an insanely big ego to think one of your comments could hurt my feelings.

My feelings aren't hurt at all. Believe it or not, I genuinely think you're a moron, and other comment you've got coming will be used as further evidence.

You're the dumbest guy here.

Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
Bewbz. Then again...

The Grey Fox
****ing RJ/DDD crew going around messing with any thread not stupid enough for them again huh?

Bloinky
MJ died from eating 12 year nuts.

FoxMeister
His heart couldn't beat it

That ACDC Chick
Q: What does Michael Jackson and a X-Box have in common? A: They are both made of plastic and little kids turn them on.

Rogue Jedi
Originally posted by The Grey Fox
****ing RJ/DDD crew going around messing with any thread not stupid enough for them again huh? big grin

Ahsoka Tano
Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
big grin

laughing big grin wink roll eyes (sarcastic) rolling on floor laughing roll eyes (sarcastic) roll eyes (sarcastic)

occultdestroyer
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and plastic?
Nothing.

Punkyhermy
this is a perfect example of classnessness. erm

Rogue Jedi
I made a joke or two, I feel sorta bad about it now. Oh well.

occultdestroyer
Originally posted by Punkyhermy
this is a perfect example of classnessness. erm
In all seriousness, if you're only here to chastise us from posting some jokes, go to the Movie Forum or Music Forum and look for a 'serious' MJ thread there. We don't want spoilsports like you in this thread.

you get thorns
Farrah Fawcett dies and gets to heaven.

God decides since she lived by His standards she will be granted one wish.

She asked for all the children in the world to be safe from harm.

God killed Michael Jackson.

Rogue Jedi
Pooooooooooooooooooooooooor MJ. Poor little MJ.

FeelGood
Originally posted by lord xyz
Day 96 and Jade Goody gets a new housemate...

At least a celebrity worth a damn is getting some attention and not that useless sack of crap.

lord xyz
Originally posted by FeelGood
At least a celebrity worth a damn is getting some attention and not that useless sack of crap. Well, when we saw her in the paper, a lot of people were thinking Matt Lucas was dying.

That ACDC Chick
Originally posted by Punkyhermy
this is a perfect example of classnessness. erm
this is just our way for mourning the King of Pop


deal and do what occultdestroyer saidawehawe

dadudemon
Originally posted by lord xyz
Wow. you must have an insanely big ego to think one of your comments could hurt my feelings.

No.


Not at all.


I know you have problems following along, so I'll refresh your memory:


You made a joke, and said you made it.

Originally posted by lord xyz
Michael Jackson actually killed himself to get closer to David Cameron's son.

This one I just made up.




Then someone told you, basically, it sucked.

Originally posted by Piggle Humsy
It shows awehuhd



Then you got your feelings hurt.
Originally posted by lord xyz
I was reluctant to actually mention it was my joke, simply for that comment.


Then I made my comment about your feelings getting hurt.
Originally posted by dadudemon
Ahhh. Poor little dude...getting his feelings hurt. sad




Then you responded with more butthurt.
Originally posted by lord xyz
You. Are. A. Moron.




Then I made a comment very similar to my first.
Originally posted by dadudemon
Awwwww...Poor little guy, lashing out because his feelings are still hurt.


It's okay. Here's a popsicle, young man. That'll cheer you right up!




Strange that you interpreted my posts as an attempt at "hurt feelings." Your ability to not follow a conversation is legendary.


Originally posted by lord xyz
My feelings aren't hurt at all.

Sure.

Exhibit a:

Originally posted by lord xyz
I was reluctant to actually mention it was my joke, simply for that comment.





Originally posted by lord xyz
Believe it or not, I genuinely think you're a moron,

You cannot project yourself onto others and hope it is true. That is not how it works.







Originally posted by lord xyz
and other comment you've got coming will be used as further evidence.

Indeed. Further evidence that you call people morons when you're the one who can not even follow a conversation.






Originally posted by lord xyz
You're the dumbest guy here.

Nah. I think you've got me beaten at that, in spades.

Exhibit b:

Originally posted by lord xyz
humans have no natural defense against Swine Flu

The pure ignorance of that sentence more than obviates a contradiction in your "dumbest guy" claim.

So, again...

Originally posted by dadudemon
You cannot project yourself onto others and hope it is true. That is not how it works.







Originally posted by lord xyz
Then again...

Oh man! Such MYSTERY! I WONDER who you are referring to! The suSPENSE!

Bowser jr
well i heard that he was going to be melted down and made into dolls so little kids can play with him for a change

Bowser jr
also is he going to get buried, cremated or recycled? because he's made of plastic.

Bowser jr
one more. also i heard that he was going to be melted down and made into plastic bags but then people thought again because it would be dangerous for the kids

Ax3l
Originally posted by dadudemon
No.


Not at all.


I know you have problems following along, so I'll refresh your memory:


You made a joke, and said you made it.






Then someone told you, basically, it sucked.





Then you got your feelings hurt.



Then I made my comment about your feelings getting hurt.





Then you responded with more butthurt.





Then I made a comment very similar to my first.





Strange that you interpreted my posts as an attempt at "hurt feelings." Your ability to not follow a conversation is legendary.




Sure.

Exhibit a:









You cannot project yourself onto others and hope it is true. That is not how it works.









Indeed. Further evidence that you call people morons when you're the one who can not even follow a conversation.








Nah. I think you've got me beaten at that, in spades.

Exhibit b:



The pure ignorance of that sentence more than obviates a contradiction in your "dumbest guy" claim.

So, again...











Oh man! Such MYSTERY! I WONDER who you are referring to! The suSPENSE! What a waste of time it was for you to put that post together.

dadudemon
Originally posted by Ax3l
What a waste of time it was for you to put that post together.

You are, as always, correct. He most likely won't understand most of what I did in that post.

sad

Ultimate Wil
I don't like to make jokes about MJ now, but I heard this one

Farah told god that she wanted peace for her kids forever, so god killed Michael Jackson.

Robtard
That was unfunny.

Not because I have some weird desire to express faux-sadness over MJ's death like it personally affects me in some shape way or form, as I still have his albums in my music collection and can enjoy them whenever I wish, but it was just an unfunny joke.

Ultimate Wil
I heard it from someone dipshit, didn't say it was funny.

dadudemon
Originally posted by Ultimate Wil
I heard it from someone dipshit, didn't say it was funny.

I think he's joking around...because....that's about the 5th time that joke has appeared in this thread.

lord xyz
He makes a good point. MJ has had no personal connection to most of the people mourning over his death.

The Grey Fox
And it's not like he even makes good music anymore.

occultdestroyer
Knock knock!

Who's there?

Dead.

Dead who.

Dead Michael Jackson.
Did he died?

Spartan005
I don't know if this one's been said yet but....


A mom's spending a day at the beach. What does she say to Michael Jackson?

































Get out of my son!

TurboDouche
WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MICHAEL JACKSON AND A GROCERY BAG? One's white, made of plastic, and dangerous to children, and the other is a grocery bag. LOLOLOLOL WINGET

occultdestroyer
My daddy rapes me. That's why I love Mr. Jackson.
He has a lot in common with daddy.

occultdestroyer
UU_IsUwBoIg

grimify
Michael Jackson called Boyz-2-Men because he thought they were an escort service.

Alpha Centauri
Originally posted by The Grey Fox
And it's not like he even makes good music anymore.

His last album was Invincible, which was good.

-AC

The Grey Fox
Incvincible was his last album? Weird, I thought I remembered him releasing something last year or so, my bad.

Bardock42
Originally posted by Robtard
That was unfunny.

Not because I have some weird desire to express faux-sadness over MJ's death like it personally affects me in some shape way or form, as I still have his albums in my music collection and can enjoy them whenever I wish, but it was just an unfunny joke. Originally posted by dadudemon
I think he's joking around...because....that's about the 5th time that joke has appeared in this thread. The problem really is the delivery, everytime someone mentioned it in this thread it was just dreadfully written out. The first time it appeared in the GDF MJ thread it was done extremely well, and also funny because of it.

Rogue Jedi
Originally posted by lord xyz
He makes a good point. MJ has had no personal connection to most of the people mourning over his death. Funny how that works.

occultdestroyer
Why did Michael Jackson like twenty six year olds?



Because there's twenty of them.

Syren
Originally posted by Slay
At least until he got enough.

See, that was pretty funny. Quick-witted too. But the jokes are inappropriate.

That ACDC Chick
haermm

http://i124.photobucket.com/albums/p5/littlelvr/kay/mjisdeadmotposter.jpg

Michael Jackson
That is a mean joke.

occultdestroyer
ELyTBXzfQJ8

Bardock42
Originally posted by occultdestroyer
ELyTBXzfQJ8 Hahaha

L!l'!c3y
man i was watching the purpple show last night and hey we're dissing on MJ bacc in 02.. i could not stop laghing..

lord xyz
lol cleveland show

chomperx9
OW_VN8OXRpk

Insomniatric
Originally posted by That ACDC Chick
haermm

http://i124.photobucket.com/albums/p5/littlelvr/kay/mjisdeadmotposter.jpg

Damn you! I was going to post that!

Insomniatric
http://www.wowfailblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/celebrity-pictures-michael-jackson-white-woman.jpg

ozziememz
lol at the 'you can come out now'

DeNiro
What did the mother say to Mike jackson at the beach?

Get out of my son

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