I need some relationship advice

Or rather, some would be interesting to hear. Can't promise I'll actually follow any of KMC's advice. 😉

Basically I became interested in this girl at the college I attend. After getting to know her decently well over the course of like 3 weeks, I asked her out to dinner. She responded strangely and I found out that she already has a love interest in her life, not a boyfriend, but she has an existing interest in someone else. Naturally, I was disappointed, but she basically told me she was extremely confused because now she has an interest in me as well.

So she's somewhat torn. I can't do much it seems like.

She told me: "Can't we just have fun?" -- Which I took to mean: "Can't we just have fun... UNTIL this other guy is ready to date me?"

She said herself there's a chance of me getting ****ed over in this whole situation if I pursue her further, but she does indeed want me to pursue her.

So I'm kind of just like "well, balls."

Anyway, what'd you do?

Ditch her?

Pursue her whilst risking the chance of getting brushed aside for this other dude?

Keep in mind, I've known her for a month. She's known this guy since she was 12...

Do the best you can and have "fun"

move on honey. love traingles are no fun and most of the time when a women says that shes "torn" that tends to be a pattern. ✅

TOO LONG.

DID NOT READ.

Originally posted by Mairuzu
Do the best you can and have "fun"

Originally posted by SnakeEyes
Or rather, some would be interesting to hear. Can't promise I'll actually follow any of KMC's advice. 😉

Basically I became interested in this girl at the college I attend. After getting to know her decently well over the course of like 3 weeks, I asked her out to dinner. She responded strangely and I found out that she already has a love interest in her life, not a boyfriend, but she has an existing interest in someone else. Naturally, I was disappointed, but she basically told me she was extremely confused because now she has an interest in me as well.

So she's somewhat torn. I can't do much it seems like.

She told me: "Can't we just have fun?" -- Which I took to mean: "Can't we just have fun... UNTIL this other guy is ready to date me?"

She said herself there's a chance of me getting ****ed over in this whole situation if I pursue her further, but she does indeed want me to pursue her.

So I'm kind of just like "well, balls."

Anyway, what'd you do?

Ditch her?

Pursue her whilst risking the chance of getting brushed aside for this other dude?

Keep in mind, I've known her for a month. She's known this guy since she was 12...

Tell her that you're available until then.

Look for someone else that is available and have fun with that person.

There's thousands of girls to choose from and out of those thousands, there's someone out there more compatible for you.

No need to get hung up on just one lady. Ask her if she wants to hang out with groups of people. That can work better. As she gets to know you better, she might like you better.

I didn't waste time on girls like that. Sounds like another stupid game.

BEWBZ.

It all depends on what you want. Are you looking for a serious relationship? If so, then move on. If you keep hanging with her, other available girls who might me interested in you might think you are off limits.

If you just want to hook up, then maybe persue her and you might be knocking boots before you know it. It all depends on what her idea of 'fun' means.

Grab her boobs then run away waving your arms in the air

Hit it and quit it.
Maybe quitting it will make her say the same thing to the other guy and want you more.

Uhmmmm. I think that you should just be friends with her. But I wouldn't get too close. Cause yeah, you might get f***ed over. But I wouldn't just stop talking to her at all, at least let her know that you're there, cause that might end up a good thing later on.

Originally posted by SnakeEyes
Or rather, some would be interesting to hear. Can't promise I'll actually follow any of KMC's advice. 😉

Basically I became interested in this girl at the college I attend. After getting to know her decently well over the course of like 3 weeks, I asked her out to dinner. She responded strangely and I found out that she already has a love interest in her life, not a boyfriend, but she has an existing interest in someone else. Naturally, I was disappointed, but she basically told me she was extremely confused because now she has an interest in me as well.

So she's somewhat torn. I can't do much it seems like.

She told me: "Can't we just have fun?" -- Which I took to mean: "Can't we just have fun... UNTIL this other guy is ready to date me?"

She said herself there's a chance of me getting ****ed over in this whole situation if I pursue her further, but she does indeed want me to pursue her.

So I'm kind of just like "well, balls."

Anyway, what'd you do?

Ditch her?

Pursue her whilst risking the chance of getting brushed aside for this other dude?

Keep in mind, I've known her for a month. She's known this guy since she was 12...

I wouldn't do it.

Seems to me if you do it and your heart is really in it for this girl, you're going to end up hurt.

Sure you could have 'fun' and maybe that will be enough for now. But soon you'll want more if you really like her, and as pormised she won't give you more.

She'll always be focused on the other guy, and you will notice this when your with her, and if that wouldn't drive you crazy you are something else.

Say no, and if it's meant to be maybe she'll quit chasing a dream and want to be with you for real. But don't let yourself be second priority.

Trust me when i say just having fun will never be enough if you really like a person.

It's tempting to just take what you can get. I understand that. But in the long run that's a really bad idea.

Originally posted by steverules_2
Grab her boobs then run away waving your arms in the air

HA

yeah girl sounds kinda 'high maintenance'

It's simple really.

The only thing standing in your way of a heroic victory with this woman is the other guy.

He must be disposed of, then she will be your's.

Play it cool, man, make it seem like you dont care one way or the other.

Originally posted by SnakeEyes
Or rather, some would be interesting to hear. Can't promise I'll actually follow any of KMC's advice. 😉

Basically I became interested in this girl at the college I attend. After getting to know her decently well over the course of like 3 weeks, I asked her out to dinner. She responded strangely and I found out that she already has a love interest in her life, not a boyfriend, but she has an existing interest in someone else. Naturally, I was disappointed, but she basically told me she was extremely confused because now she has an interest in me as well.

So she's somewhat torn. I can't do much it seems like.

She told me: "Can't we just have fun?" -- Which I took to mean: "Can't we just have fun... UNTIL this other guy is ready to date me?"

She said herself there's a chance of me getting ****ed over in this whole situation if I pursue her further, but she does indeed want me to pursue her.

So I'm kind of just like "well, balls."

Anyway, what'd you do?

Ditch her?

Pursue her whilst risking the chance of getting brushed aside for this other dude?

Keep in mind, I've known her for a month. She's known this guy since she was 12...

If you're truly interested in a relationship with her, don't pursue it, because she will pick the other dude if it comes down to it.

If you think you just want to have some fun with with her until one of you is in a relationship, go for it because that seems to be what she wants too, but be careful not to get too attached for when and if she does start dating the other guy.

Thanks guys.

The consensus seems to be: A) have fun with her but don't get too attached and/or B) just say no if I care about her.

Makes sense.

Oh yeah or C) grab her boobs... or some variation of this.

walk away from it...at least for now. it doesn't seem like you can keep things casual without getting attached.

hir ihr n quit iht.. real talk..