Enyalus
When I first came to KMC, I had practically zero knowledge of Pre-Crisis Continuity. In order to remedy that, and especially to be able to debate Pre-Crisis Superman better, a while ago I decided to begin reading Superman stories beginning from the Golden Age and ending with about 1978-9 (World's Finest, Superman, AC, Superboy & the Legion.) Today, I read the most disturbing comics story ever....which is saying something considering that just yesterday I was forced to read Mai-Chan's Daily Life.
That story? Action Comics #260. For those of you who have read it, please, feel free to comment on this post and sympathize with me, as I am deeply disturbed. For those who have not read it - fear not, for I feel equally compelled to share with you the plot of this twisted and highly demented tale.
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/th_AC_260_1.jpg
Like the cover suggests, Superman meets a super-powered woman - in this case from the fourth dimension - and falls in love. After she rescues Lois from a tornado, Superman arrives and they go on a...super-date!
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/th_AC_260_2.jpg
Look, isn't that sweet? She's thinking that his eyes are beautiful. Pay attention to this part - it will become severely disturbing all too soon, I promise.
Their date progresses as they visit Egypt and Milkwaukee (because if anything will impress a gal and get her to put out, its visiting Wisconsin, amirite?), where the ardent Superman overtakes the Maid, and they share a kiss:
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/th_AC_260_3.jpg
Aww, how sweet.
In an effort to be a complete bastard to Lois, he lets her know that he plans on proposing to Mighty Maid and wants her to be there for the lulz (and also to report the story):
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/th_AC_260_4.jpg
As you can see, Mighty Maid and Superman share another passionate kiss, after which Superman makes fun of Lois for being a woman because, well, he's a bastard. Anyway, as you can see, Superman has decided to leave Earth with his new fiancee and live in the fourth-dimension with her. But as they go to leave this plane of existence....
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/th_AC_260_5.jpg
Wait, what's this? Was it all a setup? And who is Mighty Maid really?
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/th_AC_260_6.jpg
OH NO! OH SWEET JESUS NO!! NOT YOUR COUSIN, NOT YOUR FREAKIN' COUSIN??? Superman reveals it was all a trap. Oh, god, and Ackbar hadn't even been invented yet to warn us all.
I hope all of you are reclicking on the pictures of them kissing now, and of Supergirl-as-Mighty-Maid thinking to herself that her own cousin's eyes are beautiful.
Very disturbing, yes? But wait, channeling the dearly departed Billy Mayes, there's more!! Unwilling to leave their story at the level of fail and incestuousness it was already at, DC felt compelled to disturb me, and hopefully all of you even more. After the plot wraps up and everything's back to normal, Superman leaves us with this insightful gem:
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/th_AC_260_7.jpg
That's right. Supergirl is 15 in this story. Also notice that the impressionable young Kara has apparently fallen for her cousin, calling her time as Mighty Maid 'thrilling' and sheds tears as she looks longingly into her cousin's 'beautiful' eyes.
In fact, given all this information, I'm forced to ask what else Superman did besides making out with his own underage cousin that wasn't pictured on-panel? I mean, Superman is so rockin' the pedosmile and sideways glance here:
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/AC_260_8.png
And what about when he's thinking about how young and (presumably) how hot she is:
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/AC_260_9.png
With the thumbs up and shit-eating grin, you know he's looking at the readers and telling us, "That's right. I hit that shit."
I hardly post in this subforum, but dude...this called for an exception. On a scale of 1 to 10, exactly how frightening and/or completely arousing is this??
That story? Action Comics #260. For those of you who have read it, please, feel free to comment on this post and sympathize with me, as I am deeply disturbed. For those who have not read it - fear not, for I feel equally compelled to share with you the plot of this twisted and highly demented tale.
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/th_AC_260_1.jpg
Like the cover suggests, Superman meets a super-powered woman - in this case from the fourth dimension - and falls in love. After she rescues Lois from a tornado, Superman arrives and they go on a...super-date!
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/th_AC_260_2.jpg
Look, isn't that sweet? She's thinking that his eyes are beautiful. Pay attention to this part - it will become severely disturbing all too soon, I promise.
Their date progresses as they visit Egypt and Milkwaukee (because if anything will impress a gal and get her to put out, its visiting Wisconsin, amirite?), where the ardent Superman overtakes the Maid, and they share a kiss:
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/th_AC_260_3.jpg
Aww, how sweet.
In an effort to be a complete bastard to Lois, he lets her know that he plans on proposing to Mighty Maid and wants her to be there for the lulz (and also to report the story):
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/th_AC_260_4.jpg
As you can see, Mighty Maid and Superman share another passionate kiss, after which Superman makes fun of Lois for being a woman because, well, he's a bastard. Anyway, as you can see, Superman has decided to leave Earth with his new fiancee and live in the fourth-dimension with her. But as they go to leave this plane of existence....
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/th_AC_260_5.jpg
Wait, what's this? Was it all a setup? And who is Mighty Maid really?
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/th_AC_260_6.jpg
OH NO! OH SWEET JESUS NO!! NOT YOUR COUSIN, NOT YOUR FREAKIN' COUSIN??? Superman reveals it was all a trap. Oh, god, and Ackbar hadn't even been invented yet to warn us all.
I hope all of you are reclicking on the pictures of them kissing now, and of Supergirl-as-Mighty-Maid thinking to herself that her own cousin's eyes are beautiful.
Very disturbing, yes? But wait, channeling the dearly departed Billy Mayes, there's more!! Unwilling to leave their story at the level of fail and incestuousness it was already at, DC felt compelled to disturb me, and hopefully all of you even more. After the plot wraps up and everything's back to normal, Superman leaves us with this insightful gem:
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/th_AC_260_7.jpg
That's right. Supergirl is 15 in this story. Also notice that the impressionable young Kara has apparently fallen for her cousin, calling her time as Mighty Maid 'thrilling' and sheds tears as she looks longingly into her cousin's 'beautiful' eyes.
In fact, given all this information, I'm forced to ask what else Superman did besides making out with his own underage cousin that wasn't pictured on-panel? I mean, Superman is so rockin' the pedosmile and sideways glance here:
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/AC_260_8.png
And what about when he's thinking about how young and (presumably) how hot she is:
http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x287/Deywos/AC_260_9.png
With the thumbs up and shit-eating grin, you know he's looking at the readers and telling us, "That's right. I hit that shit."
I hardly post in this subforum, but dude...this called for an exception. On a scale of 1 to 10, exactly how frightening and/or completely arousing is this??