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"CHRISSSSSSSSSSS" Wesker screamed in a fit of RAGE, unable to watch Chris escape from his grasp. He flung his Uroboros covered arm upwards, latching onto the helicopter and trying desperately to bring it down. Over and over, Wesker shook his arm, trying to bring his most hated enemy into the fiery lava below. Then, as he glared at the helicopter in RAGE, he saw Chris and his little African whore grab a pair of rocket launchers. They thought they could kill HIM? Wesker may have laughed if not for the fact he was in painful agony. He pulled once more, trying as best he could with his depleted strength to pull it down. Then, he heard the sound of the rockets being fired. He watched with fury as the rockets flew towards him, until he could almost feel them touch his head, when, the next he saw, was complete darkness, and then, after a few moments, he saw that he was in a bar of some sorts.

Wesker looked around the room, quite confused. He looked at his body, and nearly shouted out in RAGE. No longer did he have his own body, no. Instead, he had some sort of green, wrinkled body. It still had power, yes, perhaps even more strength then his old body, but it was still disgusting. He looked at his reflection in a window, and saw he had still retained his head. Before Wesker could comprehend all of this, the door to the bar opened.

In walked a queer looking man, clad in green, and even wearing a weird, green hat. Wesker also noticed that he carried a sword and shield of some sorts. He passed Wesker without a word, and sat upon a bar stool. After a few moments, the bartender emerged from a door.

"AHHHHH! THERE IS MY FAVORITE CUSTOMER" The bartender screamed at the green clad man. The man responded only with a high pitched yelp. The bartender nodded, and slipped his hand under the bar, and pulled out a bottle of what appeared to be milk, and handed it to the man. The man pulled out some sort of jewels, gave them to the bartender, made another high pitched yelp, then began to drink the milk.

It was at this point, where Wesker was so consumed by the RAGE, that he could no longer stand it. He ran over to the green clad man, and punched him in the face. The man made a high pitched yelp, removed his sword and shield and prepared to strike Wesker, when the bartender screamed, "ENOUGH!". Both Wesker and the green clad man stopped.
"IF YOU MUST FIGHT, THEN YOU SHALL FIGHT AS IS TRADITION!"
The green clad man nodded, but Wesker could only stare in confusion and RAGE, until the bartender, again, put his hand under the bar. Now, however, he pulled out a pitcher of milk. He put both his hands under the bar and removed two large mugs. It took Wesker a second to realize that it was a drinking contest. It was then that Wesker's overconfidence took over. There was no way he would lose to this queerly dressed man. After the bartender poured milk into both glasses, Wesker gripped his mug, turned to the man, and said,
"Your future hinges upon this fight."
The man responded only with a yelp.

ROUND 1: Milk drinking contest (Whoever can drink the most milk wins)
ROUND 2: Alcohol drinking contest (All forms of Alcohol are available, whoever gets the most alcohol without passing out wins.
ROUND 3: Milk AND Alcohol drinking contest (Whoever can drink the most milk mixed with alcohol wins


Who shall win?

"FinalAnswer leans back in his chair, stares at what he has wrought, and has a smirk grow across his face. Slowly, he raises his tea cup, and takes a small, delicate sip from it."

Ten internets ter ya for making the bartender give milk to Link and Wesker


~ Link isn't manly enough for alcohol. He only wins the milk drinking contest vin

Originally posted by Demonic Phoenix
Ten internets ter ya for making the bartender give milk to Link and Wesker


~ Link isn't manly enough for alcohol. He only wins the milk drinking contest vin

Lol, Link eats live worms, bee larva, dead monster fluids and other nasty shit. Alcohol ain't nuthin.

http://downloads.startpause.com/Articles/Links/young.jpg

Originally posted by LLLLLink
Lol, Link eats live worms, bee larva, dead monster fluids and other nasty shit. Alcohol ain't nuthin.

http://downloads.startpause.com/Articles/Links/young.jpg Unless you can prove the content of said fluids, it proves nothing.

Milk mixed with alcohol sounds nasty.

Originally posted by Heythere,Honey
Milk mixed with alcohol sounds nasty. It's called a white Russian.

Anyway:

Link can drink a full litre of milk in a single gulp. Five litres of Milk is ten gulps and causes him no discomfort, infact, it gives only benefits. How much milk could he drink? Far more far faster than anyone without any milk related feats. That's right, Wesker probably doesn't have any feats of Milk tolerance, does he?

As for booze, I had thought of something whilst under it's influence that would've won me the thread, but I forget now.

Originally posted by NemeBro
Unless you can prove the content of said fluids, it proves nothing.

If you mean the "monster fluids", then that would be Chu jelly. A certain type of Chu jelly is a poison that is deadly, far beyond that of alcohol.

OH YEEEAAAAH, Beer cancelling. Feeding Link booze is a sure way to make him OOO.

The Link in the blue tunic has an alcohol level that should be lethal, the Link in the green tunic is sober, watch.
QvBhghaVfs4

Link wins.

Lol, nice.
Although beer-canceling is banned in tournament because lightweights can't get intoxicated enough to utilize this technique.

Originally posted by LLLLLink
Lol, nice.
Although beer-canceling is banned in tournament because lightweights can't get intoxicated enough to utilize this technique. Wait, someone legit tourne-banned this? haermm AWESOME.

No, I was just being a smart-ass. Sorry.

Oh.

I legit lol'd at your enthusiasm, though.
If I host a tourney, I'll ban it for you, just to increase it's notoriety.

link-rape

Link can drink the alcohol as fast as he can milk.. bugs and jelly creatures >~>
May take some nasty effects later but it'll all go down.

Originally posted by ScreamPaste
It's called a white Russian.

Anyway:

Link can drink a full litre of milk in a single gulp. Five litres of Milk is ten gulps and causes him no discomfort, infact, it gives only benefits. How much milk could he drink? Far more far faster than anyone without any milk related feats. That's right, Wesker probably doesn't have any feats of Milk tolerance, does he?

As for booze, I had thought of something whilst under it's influence that would've won me the thread, but I forget now.

You forget fool.

Wesker has Kain's undead body, which wouldn't succumb to the effects of over drinking milk or alcohol.

313

Originally posted by FinalAnswer
You forget fool.

Wesker has Kain's undead body, which wouldn't succumb to the effects of over drinking milk or alcohol.

313 Zelda style milk? I demand feats of resistance.

Who the **** said it was Zelda style milk?

IT IS IMPLIED:

It is a bar that Link frequents, and serves bottled milk. How could it not be Zelda style milk?

The moment before Link can finish drinking his cup of milk, Wesker for some reason shouts "CHRIIIIIIIIIS" again and this surprise made Link cough out his milk thus making him disqualified for spewing out the drink.

Originally posted by ScreamPaste
IT IS IMPLIED:

It is a bar that Link frequents, and serves bottled milk. How could it not be Zelda style milk?

Is there any bar in LoZ that has Dark Kahn as its bartender?

Originally posted by Nemesis X
The moment before Link can finish drinking his cup of milk, Wesker for some reason shouts "CHRIIIIIIIIIS" again and this surprise made Link cough out his milk thus making him disqualified for spewing out the drink.

...Link kicks Wesker under the table, killing him and disqualifying them both, but leaving only Link, who wins by default.

^See how that works? Same thing.

Originally posted by FinalAnswer
Is there any bar in LoZ that has Dark Kahn as its bartender? You don't think Dark Khan is qualified to bartend in Hyrule? >|

Originally posted by ScreamPaste
...Link kicks Wesker under the table, killing him and disqualifying them both, but leaving only Link, who wins by default.

^See how that works? Same thing.

But Wesker has Kain's body. Vampires don't feel **** unless it's stabbing related or touched by a holy cross but I don't think that religion exists in the Zelda-verse and I think we all know Link won't go that far for he's nothing but a goody two-shoes. You saying he kicks and kills him is way out of character.

Originally posted by ScreamPaste
You don't think Dark Khan is qualified to bartend in Hyrule? >|

Has Dark Kahn travelled to the LoZ verse as of late?

He'd have to have, because I don't recall Link frequenting bars in the MK or DC universes.

Nah

Also, a bar that serves milk? Obviously LoZverse.

Indeed it has to be. I'm not aware of any bars that serve milk. Anything non-alcohol related served at a bar, it would have to be water.

Or a bar for pussies 313

Originally posted by FinalAnswer
Or a bar for pussies 313

YOU THREW WESKER IN A PUSSY BAR?!

Regardless, having Kain's body is actually not helpful here.

Kain still metabolises things, blood, mainly. The thing is, his physiology is no longer equipt to deal with things humans consume, such as milk. 131 Thus furthering Link's edge.

Originally posted by FinalAnswer
Or a bar for pussies 313

The Bar serves milk that grants infinite magic. Milk > any alcohol.

Advert for the IT crowd just came on. Guy was drinking milk in a bar. Coincidence, nay?

If the vampires body cant consume human food then it'd either just stay in the gut or be puked up or blah. If it can be held in then he doesn't have to stop drinking.

Originally posted by BloodRain
Advert for the IT crowd just came on. Guy was drinking milk in a bar. Coincidence, nay?

If the vampires body cant consume human food then it'd either just stay in the gut or be puked up or blah. If it can be held in then he doesn't have to stop drinking. This is where I bring up that because he does not metabolise it, it remains in his gut, which has limited space.

Edit: And yeah, synchronisity.

And Link's metabolism acts that fast? O.o

Still, slime drinker to win~

Yeah, monster slime FTW.

Originally posted by ScreamPaste
Regardless, having Kain's body is actually not helpful here.

Kain still metabolises things, blood, mainly. The thing is, his physiology is no longer equipt to deal with things humans consume, such as milk. 131 Thus furthering Link's edge.

Prove it.

You sure Wesker's RAGE wouldn't evaporate the milk when it gets inside him? If he can do that, he can drink unlimited amounts of milk and alcohol.

Originally posted by FinalAnswer
"FinalAnswer leans back in his chair, stares at what he has wrought, and has a smirk grow across his face. Slowly, he raises his tea cup, and takes a small, delicate sip from it."

"Xanatos sits up in his chair, shaking his head and tsking at what has been created. He then brings forth the ever-present emoticon that graces such threads."

gay_rage

Chu Jelly and Bee Larva? Bah, that stuff's for pussies. You never seen Link chug a goddamned tortured spirit? Bottled Poes FTW.

Link will drink your soul.

"Ganondorf cant break this bottle, b****!" Those bottles are uber.