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As some of you may have seen, I was being silly in one of the other threads and made up some Page 3 style puns about some members. Corran thought it would be a good idea to make a thread of it and I agree.

For those outside of the UK, our tabloids have a topless girl on page 3 every day. And every day they also have a really cheesey little biog of the model with more puns than you can shake a stick at.

All you have to do is give a brief description of your phote pose and make up an amusing little biog.

I'll start us off, enjoy!

Description:

Me layed out in a sexy pose across the bonnet (!) of an X-Wing fighter, wearing nothing except underwear of a totally biological manufacture.....

Biog:

David, 25, says he's a big fan of Star Wars and insists his favourite character is the evil Emporer but he's not a big fan of the New Jedi Order books at all, "..they're just so boring!", he said whilst rubbing ice on his nips for the photo shoot.

Well we bet you ladies will be having Palpy-tations looking at this hunk, especially wearing that revealing Yuuzhan-Thong!



See its easy, everyone have ago for themselves. And remember there can never be too many puns in a page 3 biog!

Description:

Corran hung in a well lit bedroom to iron rings by leather straps wearing nothing but a wookie skin thong.


Biog:

Gary, 30(and a bit) loves movies epecially Star wars, but don't get too hung up on this strapping fellow or you may find you've bitten off more than you can chew-bacca.

I'm boycotting this thread

me throwing up with the thought of Mech and Corrans piccies

very comical! I some ppl are exercising their imaginations a wee bit much!

come on post your own.

In this instance I think not! *points and wags finger at corran, whilst shaking head and tuting*

Well then Mech may be tempted to use his over zealous imagination and make one up for you himself.

Is that so?! *raises eyebrown, unimpressed!*

Or I could but it might have a sicker side to it than you would have wished.

see ya later!

Mech and Corran on the hood of a F1

Corran and Lara make a good couple. I feel a wedding coming up. *start practising wedding march on piano*

oh brother cake time yet again

now how many times have I heard that said about me?
typically sad!

wedding is such an ugly word

It's an ugly forum.

I wouldnt say this is an ugly forum,

but yes wedding is an ugly word!

Wedding? now where did that come from, this really is getting ugly now.

who said I wanted to marry anyone in the first place?

like I've said many times before, marriage is not on my to do list!

Nobody asked you if you wanted, Lara....

well theres not alot you can really do If I dont want to coz I'll just punch my way out of it!

Wasn't on my to do list. Well it may have been, but it's completed now.

Less chat, more biog's!!

difficult, no one has the elite pun-skills you posess mech..

Ah, just to be a good sport, I'll play along....


THE PIC : (which will help only for those of you who have actually seen a pic of me and will also shock those newbies who still haven't figured out that I'm a girl)

Gundy, wearing only a black leather thong of course, is draped across the plush seating on Vader's personal shuttle, awaiting a clandestine meeting.

THE BIO : Gundy, 39, (shut up finti), just adores guys who breathe heavy in her ear. "And I just go crazy over having all parts of my body 'invadered'" she says, adding that she "gives great helmet".

Ohhh, keep talking baby I'm almost there.

how many days to July???????????? and thanks Gundy for a nice visual, thinks about the pic of Mech and Corran

Mech I think we should put the originals in here too.

GRRRRRRRR.......don't even start, finti......

What will it take to clam you up ? Name your price.

Here's Lara's as she won't do her own.....

Lara, 16, loves to play on the internet and eat curries. We bet you'd love to tikka closer look at those babies and maybe take a mega-bite out of her!

And here's Ush's, as he hasn't even graced us with his presence....

Ush, 25, loves nothing more than Star Wars and visiting the library.

We bet you ladies would love to use your jedi mind tricks to get an alphe-bite out of his light-sabre!

no money can buy me Gun , but if you git up and dance them tables Gundy THEN

Hey mech, u didn't make a pic 4 Lara...

Just go to Queeq's bar and see how she describes herself attired today

hey! I cant eat curries! I'm allergic to spices!

Then post a biog for yourself. or do you require some creative thinking

I had to restrain myself from posting a rather abusive phrase, then!

I'll use an alternative instead!

got lost! literally!

Fine, play that game.

that wasnt aimed at you corran!

Mech, any entry involving me has to, by law, include a pun on EXTENDING my lightsabre, thanks. Or maybe turning it on.

*shakes head in dissapointment*

Hey, I didn't want to post one, but he could at least have made a good job of it.

He would have, you know.

.

Lara's attorney has obviously advised her not to make a comment.

She can afford an attorney?

Can she spell it?

Can she count how much he costs?

grow up! what would I need an attorney for?

For law suits started by us to get some compensation for the insults of immaturity!!

why is that so not hysterically funny?

cos it's close to the truth.

Corran has had another idea for my page 3 bio... hmmm...

cause Mah is your attorney which means you allready lost

hey, wait a minute! ............thats not funny!

*starts to cry*

AWWWWWWWWW!

(Hugs Lara)

cheating

no its not!

(snuggles up to Lara)

fraud

*snuggles up to finti*

the right way

Was that aimed at little ol' me Lara?

I am irresistible as well as unavoidable

and adorable

And modest.

no, it was aimed at corran!

How strange, you'd already said it wasn't aimed at me.

Oh I dont know! I cant remember! *vigorously shakes head*

must be the sun

You have to remember, we need to know whether it's me or Mech that needs to be upset.

ok, if I cant remember then its aimed at both of you!

and that is for what? exactly?

<----- in disguise

It'll take more than that to upset me, I'm virually un-upsetable.

(Is that a word?)

Aston Villa should have played in the Womens league at least there they would have had a chance to reach Europe

I dont think that there is such a word! might be best to ask ush.

AVFC upset me on a weekly basis


I can't sack Ush, Lara, the place would fall to pieces!

mech! I didnt say sack! I said ASK. Oh, nevr mind!

Oh, you've changed it now!

no!

I could change it back, just to prove you wrong, but I won't.

Mech 26th April The mighty Everton V's Aston Vanilla, wanna small wager on it, say 3 Imperial credits?

What the hell, lets make a round 10 credits?

We'll win. *Prays to all known gods for a win*

10 credits it is then. Heh, heh, easiest 10 credits I'll ever make.

what happened to the biogs?

It seems I'm the only lord of the puns.

HEY i TRIED.

keep 'em rolling! and I dont eat curry's so you might want the re-think that one!

Sorry dude, and Gundy did one too.

Nobody else could be bothered, and here's me thinking puns are the lowest form of wit.........no wait thats sarcasm.

dont over heat now!

I sent one to Ush for him, but don't think he's going to use it.

Why not?

Dunno, I think he thought it wasn't good enough, maybe the Lord of the Puns can do it for him.

Knowing Ush, he's probably on his 5th draft and agonizing over whether we'll get the jokes.

I think he is liaising with a publisher to get the go ahead first.

They'll be argueing whether it should be classed as fiction or non-fiction no doubt.

I wonder if Ush will get his baps out on the back page author pic, as it is a page 3 biog?

Nooooooo, this is not something that will sell well.

Probably best........but if I know Ush as well as I think I do, I'll bet he wears a low cut top with one of the puppy's noses showing (if you get my meaning).

only too well. Thanks.

This remind me a game I sometimes play with my bro where we say outrageous things to try and out-gross each other. He usually wins as he's willing to go that extra mile. He's made me dry heave with some of the things he's said, seriously.

That's normal, we do that without even making it a game, although one of my mates is pretty sick and I can't imagine what he went through in childhood to come up with some of the stuff he does.

Must be a bloke thing then....

or a sicko thing.

Well that would explain you, but what about me?

Something in your childhood.

I've always been different from other people, even as a child.

I was the only one at the orphanage who went home for lunch.

Did they pack your lunch in a map of the UK with Big Red X's on other cities?

Which of you would like smacked first ?

*raises hand in the air*

That would be me.

C22 got my Cleopatra joke. Made it worthwhile.

Did I miss something?

Yeah, it was in the PDF.

Oh, I'm not man enough to venture in there.

Yes, you are. You just don't know where to find it.

I'm a man, hence I don't ask for directions anywhere.

except for when looking for something in the fridge

You did claim you weren't man enough, so that would include not having a sense of direction.

OMFG!

ROTFLMFAO!

women have no logic sense though............

choose your words very carefully Finti!

it is the truth

Who's been teaching Lara new abbreviations?

Thats a cut and paste I reckon.

Women's logic: "I don't want to join a gym until I've lost some weight".

TOLOBS!

thats a lot of bullshit?

No! thats one load of BS.

certainly is

I dont go down the gym because I do sparing with dad in the back garden when the weathers good if not I do regular exercises, like sit-up etc in my room

I exercise a few times a week, means I can drink more Guiness, eat more chocolate without worrying too much about getting fat.

sit up in your room, and me who those rooms was for lying down

thought kind of fell out of there, should have been after who

Just come back from the gym, damn it was hot in there now the weather has gone nice. I was sweating cobs.

i hate science it's so boring, and gross at times. especially with all the perverted froshes in the class. welcome to hellK! ^.~

froshes?????????? anything to do with frogs

Ribbit?

As in Rabbit ?