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I was pulling into my driveway about an hour ago, and across the street the neighbor's 3 year old girl was out front. Out of the corner of my eye it looked like thete was a toy on the ground in front of her. A toy that was...moving?
I focused and sure as shit if it wasnt a snake.
Concerned i jogged over and sure as double shit if it wasnt a freaking rattle snake.
Luckily i'd been on my bike so i had my heavy riding boots on. Without thinking i ran/jumped/stomped its head in/pushed the kid into the grass.
I think i threw my back out.
Kid's mim comes out at the crying and sees me bent over with this twitching spazzing snake under my foot. Freaked out.
She called animal control and they're gonna check the neighborhood.
Snake measured 2 feet 4 inches.
I mean 3 feet.
No, 4!
It had two heads and 7 rattles....!

how big was the snake

2 feet 4 inches, in reality. I'm gonna fish story the hell out of it at the bar tonight, though!

Thought u got a boner I was so excited

I'm at half mast right now, so...dont worry be happy?

I can't wait for this story to turn into RivZilla vs 3 headed King Rattl-dorah!

What kind of bike ya riding?

An old fatboy.

.....................*nearly passes out from potential joke overload*

Fly almost misses the overhead smash, lob was so high it got lost in the sun.

it blinded me....

If Fly didnt give me a hard time, i'd think he was an alt!

Originally posted by riv6672

Snake measured 2 feet 4 inches.
Originally posted by walshy
how big was the snake
Originally posted by riv6672
2 feet 4 inches, YOU HAD ONE JOB

Didn't have as big of a snake story as this guy.

http://kdvr.com/2015/07/29/missouri-man-kills-a-nearly-15-foot-python-in-yard/

Originally posted by riv6672
If Fly didnt give me a hard time, i'd think he was an alt!

Compared to some of the others around here. *cough couch timmy cough cough*

I am soft on you like butter on biscuits!!!!!!

boner alert

This story makes me horny

Originally posted by Flyattractor


Compared to some of the others around here. *cough couch timmy cough cough*

I am soft on you like butter on biscuits!!!!!!
Great now we have one horny and one hungry poster!

Uh huh!

Originally posted by walshy
YOU HAD ONE JOB
-just got it-
D'oh!

http://humoncomics.com/art/troll-and-fairy.jpg

I should seriously just call myself the master of time!

Who knew...Timmy is into fairies.

Timmy. Fairies. I see what you did there!

huh

Originally posted by Time-Immemorial
huh

I didn't get it either, Lucy, joo got sum spainin' to do.

Ohh Nukey You so silly.

Originally posted by rudester
Thought u got a boner I was so excited

lol, thats what i thought too! except i was more amused than excited lol

Timmy Turner. Fairly Odd Parents!

Comes off more like a Jorgen to me.

Nah, Jorgen's cool!

I always pictured you as a Homer.

http://resources3.news.com.au/images/2009/08/24/1225765/493471-the-simpsons.jpg

That pic always cracks me up!