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Beep boop boop click whirr clack beep.
--famous bot

............
-JAWS

Don't nobody go in the bathroom for about 35,45 minutes.
https://i.makeagif.com/media/12-16-2015/bvO8Pc.gif

^^^i can see this thread a few years from now, being multiple pages, with the new forum regulars having no idea who the ppl on the first few pages are, if they even bother to look, like some of the ones we spam right now. It a comforting thought, really, to be part of history.

If ppl laugh, its a racial joke.
If ppl DONT laugh, its a racist joke.
---George Lopez

I'll return later.
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Fck b!tches, Get Money
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Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself, do not go out and look for a successful personality and duplicate it.

- Bruce Lee

You're a magician, Harry.

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Life's a Garden, Dig it. - Joe Dirt

Never inform me of the statistical calculations.
https://68.media.tumblr.com/82e752a3a5e17af4cb889f3becf8ec77/tumblr_ogah08RCu51v058vko1_500.gif

You don't score until you score.

Yoohoo, I'll make you famous
https://68.media.tumblr.com/013613711815198f2ef3faaa17aedc6d/tumblr_nnj2rjDNJH1rr8kq5o2_500.gif

I'm you Huckleberry

Game over man, game over!
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Midgets, Dwarves, MFing Unicorns...they don't want to see a Black man Make it

I am not in danger, Skyler. I am the danger! A guy opens his door and gets shot and you think that of me? No. I am the one who knocks!
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It's a fool who looks for logic in the Chambers of the human heart Pete

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CgvwypDU8AEB7Mh.jpg

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How exactly is a rainbow made? How does positrac on the rear-end of a Plymouth work? It just does

I'd buy that for a dollar.
https://68.media.tumblr.com/6ff56c57f5df467c76fd69bce9c994f1/tumblr_nvk4vzAO9I1u2ragso1_500.gif

Doesn't matter if you win by an inch or a mile. Winning is winning

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You've got me?! Who's got you?
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There are only two types of people I hate in this world: People who are intolerant of other people's culture....and the Dutch.

^^^MFAO

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Besy5rNIQAA-Avx.jpg

lol.

The other day I thought about teaching under privileged kids to learn to read better, and just thinking about was the most rewarding experience I've ever had

"I don't think Ivanka would do that inside the magazine. Although she does have a very nice figure. I've said that if Ivanka weren't my daughter, perhaps I would be dating her."

^ Disturbing.

Yea, see, you have a problem often referred to as, uh, homo UN-erectus. Yea, that would be when your wang is hugified not by the presence of a woman, but rather by a man.

Originally posted by Bashar Teg
"I don't think Ivanka would do that inside the magazine. Although she does have a very nice figure. I've said that if Ivanka weren't my daughter, perhaps I would be dating her."
^^^SICK!

Originally posted by socool8520
lol.

The other day I thought about teaching under privileged kids to learn to read better, and just thinking about was the most rewarding experience I've ever had
Where's that from???

Zoolander

Ah nertz, i didnt catch it!
Thanks, bruddah...

Originally posted by riv6672
Ah nertz, i didnt catch it!
Thanks, bruddah...

It's all good. lol

What is love? What is this longing in our hearts for togetherness? Is it not the sweetest flower? Does not this flower of love have the fragrent arroma of fine fine dining? Does not the wind love the dirt? Is not love not unlike the unlikely not it is unlikined to? Are you with someone tonight? Do not question your love. Take your lover by the hand. Release the power within yourself. You heard me release the power. Tame the wild cosmos with a whisper. Conquer heaven with one intimate caress. Thats right, don't be shy, whip out everything you've got, and do it in da butt

https://68.media.tumblr.com/5bf4f37176d1053f04cdf5b9b2e16e0f/tumblr_otbhoreCWJ1viqp59o1_500.jpg

I can't see these images at work unfortunately

Originally posted by socool8520
I can't see these images at work unfortunately

Going to be a nice treat when you get home.

https://68.media.tumblr.com/6a08d08275a6edb07868821ef30bdacb/tumblr_ot1b5rlSyn1vlqp9io1_250.gif

lol.

First take a step back...and Literally F@$k your own Face!!

https://68.media.tumblr.com/182b3962f1005b484cb4073410b917a4/tumblr_otejreOPtg1w1ejd1o1_500.gif

Originally posted by Nuke Nixon
Going to be a nice treat when you get home.

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Good Lawwd!!

If you were me then I'd be you, and I'd be using your body to get to the top. you can't stop me no matter who you are.

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Not being able to speak is not the same as not speaking. You seem as if you like to talk. I like to let people talk who like to talk. It makes it easier to find out how full of shit they are. - Jackie Chan

You don't know nothing about no War.
-Chris Tucker

I just rode the wrath of the Storm. The Majesty of the Storm and the Lightening I worshiped at the memory of those spirits of the Wolf I do at the depth of my Hearth I missed. You know know thing of loss or of the wild or the darkness. I fell sadness for the nothing you fell, but know not what you fell.

Okay. You people sit tight, hold the fort and keep the home fires burning. And if we're not back by dawn... call the president.
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I love it when a plan comes together.
-H. Smith

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The only good bug is a dead bug. - Starship Troopers

'MEDIC!'
-Starship Troopers

Who thinks they got what it takes to knock me down?
Sir, I suppose I do sir. - Starship Troopers

I came to chew bubblegum and kick ass and I'm all out of bubblegum.
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Right now Tommy is praying. And if he isn't, he F@#$en should be! - Snatch

Cease fire.
Put your hand on that wall trooper. PUT YOUR HAND ON THAT WALL!
-Starship Troopers

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http://www.bhsmo.net/pub/img/meme/starship_troopers_live_forever.jpg

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I was just bullshittin....and you know this man! - Friday

Look, I can see you getting all bunged up for them making you wear these kinda clothes. But face it, you're a Neo-Maxi-Zoom-Dweebie!

Mother is the word for God on the lips and hearts of all children. You're daughter is out there in the streets waiting for you. Go to her. - The Crow

From this day forward, all of the toilets in the kingdom will be known as Johns! - Robin Hood Men in Tights

Conversation with Zuzu Petals was like masturbating with a cheese grater: slightly amusing, but mostly painful.
-Ford Fairlane

As the French would say, it has a certain....I don't know what. - Dr. Evil

You Maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!

Snootchie Bootchies!! - Jay

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I'm just trying to do to do white women what the white man has been doing to us for over 400 years!

What's that?

F@#k em - Don't Be a Menace

Nothing disgusts me. At the age of eleven I walked in on my father and the Shetland pony. Does that excite you?
-Ford Fairlane

You got to shave before you leave the house in a dress like that... and I don't mean your legs.
-Ford Fairlane

This idea of perpetual happiness is crazy and overrated, because those dark moments fuel you for the next bright moments; each one helps you appreciate the other.

Excuse me, did I hear the f-word out of you? You say "****" again and I'll bang you right to ****. Now get the **** out of here.
-Ford Fairlane

You play that thing one more time, I'm gonna melt it down into hairspray.

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I'll take the Rapists for 200 Alex - Sean Connery

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"Whoah, I never said anything about a bet. I simply said that I'm going pretend to whisper a big secret into your ear so that Jake-y here thinks I'm telling you a big secret causing him to break into a hysterical confession where he actually reveals a big secret, thus confirming everything I just whispered in you ear" - Not Another Teen Movie

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A goal is not always meant to be reached, it often simply serves as something to aim at - Bruce Lee

I have no idea. People who boast about their I.Q. are losers - Stephen Hawking

Where do you think you're going? Nobody's leaving. Nobody's walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no. We're all in this together. This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here. We're gonna press on, and we're gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny fcking Kaye. And when Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he's gonna find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse.

http://cdn.quotesgram.com/img/3/26/1814963148-to_be_or_not_to_be_not_to_be.jpg

http://humoropedia.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/Funny-Dumb-and-Dumber-Quotes-5.jpg

Tell your king that William Wallace will NOT be ruled. Lower your flags and march straight back to England, stopping at every home to beg forgiveness for a hundred years of theft, rape, and murder.

I was looking for Jim Carrey Mask quotes:

https://cdn3.geckoandfly.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/mask-truth-self-quotes.jpg

I would LOVE to have hung this up at work, it woulda rubbed some ppl inworked with the wring way!!!

The best way to understand someone is to fight him, make him angry. That's when you see the real person.

Tell your king that William Wallace will NOT be ruled. Lower your flags and march straight back to England, stopping at every home to beg forgiveness for a hundred years of theft, rape, and murder

Tell your king that William Wallace will NOT be ruled. Lower your flags and march straight back to England, stopping at every home to beg forgiveness for a hundred years of theft, rape, and murder

Did i stretch out the ****ing page AGAIN?!?

Aaaahhh!

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/4f/4e/65/4f4e65738a4babd50aa670689405b217.png

I'd hate to take a bite outta you. You're a cookie full of arsenic.

http://25.media.tumblr.com/ef2061b52aad416cd8bb270b2632f306/tumblr_n0nt7ewGHI1rz1wnio2_500.gif

Everyone is a genius at least once a year. The real geniuses simply have their bright ideas closer together.

Never buy a pig in a poke!

I've been in prison for three years. My dick gets hard if the wind blows.

Momma always saud there'd be days like this; there'd be days like this my momma said.

Whats all this?!....looks like Darth Vader's bathroom!

Sweeet Caroline... Ba Ba Dum!

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You cannae break a stick in a bundle.

https://i.pinimg.com/564x/3b/76/f0/3b76f01077ea1dd85b73464f41a0ea5a.jpg

Here's the thing about 'tomorrow'. Every time i wake up, its 'today'.

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You can't serve papers on a rat, baby sister. You gotta kill him or let him be.

Meg, when i get done with you, you'll be beating off guys with both hands!
-Peter Griffin

I'll tell you one thing about the universe, though. The universe is a pretty big place. It's bigger than anything anyone has ever dreamed of before. So if it's just us... seems like an awful waste of space. Right?

http://www.rd.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2015/09/peanuts_quotes_pumpkin_patch.png

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You're speaking to my guy all wrong. That's the wrong tone. You do it again, I'll stab you in the face with a soldering iron. - Joe Dirt

I was having fun on this job! You had all this energy, and all these crazy ideas... and you kept taking your pants off.

You know that guy you see going into the convenience store when you stop off at that little town on the way to grandma's house?
A sort of shifty looking fella who buys a pack of smokes, a couple of lotto scratchers and a tall boy at ten in the morning?
The kind of guy you wait for to come out before you and your family go in? Well, that guy is me.
My name is Earl.
And if you took the time to really get to know me, find out what kind of person I truly am instead of just stereotyping me because of the way I look, well, you'd be wasting your time, because I'm exactly who you think I am.
Hell, I'll pretty much steal anything that isn't nailed down.

https://i.pinimg.com/564x/b2/04/3b/b2043bb343b9d3678d2270535dc9dd17.jpg

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"There are hundreds of millions of gun owners in this country, and not one of them will have an accident today. The only misuse of guns comes in environments where there are drugs, alcohol, bad parents, and undisciplined children. Period."
- Ted Nugent

Ted Nugent's a dick.
-riv6672

Be that as it may ( and I agree with you he's a sizable douchenozzle) he isn't wrong in this instance.

Its not so much that he's wrong (which he is, with that pretentious bullshit), its that he's Ted Nugent.

http://myfunnymemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/Jeff-Goldblum-Quote-On-God-Creating-Destroying-Dinosaurs-Man-In-Jurassic-Park_408x408.jpg

I used to want to save the world. This beautiful place. But I knew so little then. It is a land of beauty and wonder, worth cherishing in every way. But the closer you get, the more you see the great darkness simmering within. And mankind? Mankind is another story altogether.

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^^^thats very good!

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No one would ever like him; he would never be accused of being unfair.
-Aurora Teagarden

Never apologize mister, it's a sign of weakness.

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http://izquotes.com/quotes-pictures/quote-the-god-who-gave-us-life-gave-us-liberty-at-the-same-time-the-hand-of-force-may-destroy-but-thomas-jefferson-240473.jpg

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We pass a damn gas station every hundred yards for a thousand miles, but when you really need one, you end up walking your ass off. This is no way to run a desert!