Click HERE to see this thread with all of the graphics, features, and links.

This is just like campfire stories, where one person leaves off, you begin.





A city bus pulls to a stop at the corner of 5th and 8th. Out of it dashes a sweaty man in a reipped shirt, swest beading down his ice cold face. Two men jump out of the bus after him.

"There he is, get him!" one says.

The men chase the man down the street, spilling shopping bags and knocking over old ladies.

'How did they find me so fast!' He thinks to himself as he tries to loose the men in the crowd.

dashing quickly, he sees an aley,and divs into it. he sits quitely, waiting for somethin to happen....

"you can't hide forever!"

'Sure I can.' He thinks to himself smuggly. One of the men stand in front of the alley that he dashed into.

"Yo, I don't think that he went in here."

The other man slaps him upside the head, "Of course not ya doof! He ain't that dumb, unlike you."

And with that the two men ran off to continue their search

bump





i jus felt like bumping up the last thread in the forum

the man crawls out from behind the garbage can and runs down the rest of the ally

Just as he feels close to safety, the man runs right into the two guys chasing him. "Stop," says one man. "We just wanted to ask you where you got those killer pair of shoes."

"huh?" Said the man"Why?"

Suddenly the two men turn into Zigfried and Roy and several albino tigers seem to appear out of nowhere. The man runs from Zigs and Roy, a bag of green and orange pills falls from his pocket.

"Ah! Not again!" He said as he ran, he dogded behind the licker store.

And just then, his cellphone goes off, and its the last person he'd wished it would be....

The people chasing him go behind the store and make a grab for him.

but alas, it wasn't the men in pursuit of his shoes...it was his good friend and mentor Morphine, who had just called to tell him he was in a matrix syndicate story.

A sigh of relief came from the mans mouth, "I thought you were chasing me!" And he walked out of hiding to find...........5 men with swords!

this thread was at the bottom of the last page. I only resurrected it for a joke! u guys r funny u kept it on page one for days!

He pulled a sword from an large gap in a window of a store. the men began to slash at him he knocked 2 down. The 2 had deep wounds in there chests from his attack. The other three circled him. and he did not see the capton behind him. The captan smacked him on the back of the head. The man blacked out.

'beep beep beep beep'
SMASH!
Laura Lactose-Intolerant sat up and rubbed her crusty eyes. She flipped off her Pokemon quilt and jumped out of bed, unfortunately there was a huge hole where her MoonDreamer's carpet hed once been, which she fell through (who saw that coming?). As she picked herself up off the cold kitchen floor, she heard a thunder on the stairs, and the door swung open. Who was standing there? None other than.........

...a giant japenese monkey standing on his head eating eucalyptus trees (yes whole ones)other wise known as yokimodo the great he told me that my next mission was to.............................

find a kipper named brian, he would be coloured brown with oringy stripes, kind of like a tiger, hold on i think he is a tiger, well find either a tiger or a kipper named brian

hehehe! And once you have found this...erm...thing with stripes..., you must teach it latin and send it on a journey of teaching others to do backflips whilst talking latin

Laura scratched her greasy head and farted.
"sorry" she giggled
"latin? where do i go to find this thing? and what is more, who the hell are you?"
she sat down at the breakfast table, apparently having forgotten that a monkey was eating trees in her hallway and that she had just asked it a question, and farted again
"yeuch, that was a wet one"

no...your vulgarizing my, kozzy's, schitzo's, and nazgul's works (mc mike helped too i think) if your going to do another wacky story, make sure that there are many cameo appearances...thats what made the original funny. DO IT!

Anyways, laura decided to indulge the monkey thing. she walked out of the house when she saw a funny looking guy. "hey babay" he said. she looked in fright. Austin Powers and the shagmobile was in front of her house. She ran back in and hid behind the monkey. "help me..." she said quietly, shaking back and forth.

"I have an idea!" monkey man says. "have some milk..."

"Dont mind if i do!!" said laura and she ran back into the house opened the fridge and gulped dwn the several litres f milk that had apperaed the day before. Laura frated once more and she laughed. Then she really needed to do a wee wee so she ran to the bathroom but when she git there..........

....a hoard of strip-dancing wild turkeys are parading around her bathroom! They see her and .....

run away for some odd reason.

Then all of a sudden, the Price is Right host walked into the bathroom. He said to her....

"Little bunny foo-foo, walkin' thu the forest, pickin' up all the field mice, and boppin' em on the head!" Down came the good fairy and she said...

"My bottom is sore may i have some moisturiser?" Then John joe came along and.....

and magically conjured up a two headed pink elephant wearing a batman outfit who asked "may i borrow sugar?"

...ate the good fairy. Her spirit rose from his stomach and started...

to quote shakespeare.

oops sorry, disregard that.

Laura then ran into the field behind her house and sang "The hills are alive with the sound of potatoes!!!" The a guy called greg came along with a gun and said get off my property you little spoon!" Laura ran and ran until........

.........she tripped over and fell into a barrel full of poisonous.....

she stopped running cuz she ran out of breath. Then came along Toucan Sam who was saying "they're me lucky charms...they're grrrrrrrreeat!"

The tony the tiger came along and said "Gimme back my line you piece of banana!!!!" then the fairy appered and said.......

"Tickle me toes, love!" Then she ran away because Oscar the grouch was after her.

the big bird flew in and threw him back to sesame street. Once oscar was gone he said laura "I have advice for you for the dangerous journey you must make, be careful of the .........

..."aarrrggghhh!" the bird writhed in pain and agony. It cackled one last phrase to Laura as if in a message to avenge her death...

... "I can't... believe... it's not butter! ..." *cackles and falls dead*

"Nooooooooooo! Now I have to...

"Arrange a funeral!! Why does all this bad stuff happen to me!?" Laura decided to get some sleep so she booked into a five star hotel on her dads credit card. After a refreshing nap laura went to the hotel lobby and discovered........

a tuba in the couch!

As she sat, she again farted and giggled.
"Sorry about that", but then realized that the sound was just from sitting on the tuba...as she pulled it out of the couch, she noticed it was filled with...

oysters. "What the...

.......freakin hell?"
she looked up and saw will smith striding thru the doors of the hotel.
"play that tuba for me funky chicken!"
then he started to slide and bounce and walk and nod his head as laura played the tuba.
suddenly superman flew down from the rafters and began to get jiggy with will, but will was havin none of this!
he pulled out a huge piece of kryptonite and held it in superman's face, "eat rock, super dude!!!"
but superman just smiled evilly, pulled off his face and became.....

your mom! and told you to get up to your bedroom and bring....

lube! Because it's not really her mom, it's MICHAEL JACKSON!

michel jackson reveals it is yes he/she. he requests a large piao filled with dieing cockroaches to help protect him self from the raging...

hormones that are surging through his body. whether they are female or male hormones it is unsure....

...but all of the sudden Micael POPS! Now what?

the shreads of his formor body...

hold a tea party.

At the tea party they all play with their beloved barbies and teddy bears. The teddy bears can talk to each other, they start a conversation, unhearable to the human ear.
bear 1: ugh! why'd we have to get stuck with him??
barbie 1: you mean she?
bear 2:whatever they both...

suddenly the teddy bears/barbies get in a fight, but then the nutcracker comes by and does something...i dont know what that something was but it did something.

cracks a nut!

FART!

it cracks a nut silencing the entire group in their fight and sending them to go and kill the mass of michal jackson, rapidly returning to its original form!!

and the original form is.....jessica simpson!! bum bum BUM!!!! and she goes to the group "no, baby please! dont!" but...

a two headed pink elephant wearing a batman suit stampeded after, roaring uncontrollably and saying something along the lines of "i need sugar...im out of sugar!"

then the pink elephant took off itz batman suit, chugged down a load of sugar and turned back into laura (who is, after all, the heroine of this story). laura clombed onto the roof of the building that just appeared from nowhere and saw......

Gloria Gaynor!Laura gets the sudden urge to scream-"i will survive!"
Knowing santa is after her(she saw him previously, and he told her that he was willing to pay for sex), she jumps from the rooftop yelling-"Yay! I will finally be joined with my mums, half-cousins, once-removed aunties, dogs previous ownerss',2nd cousins's dads' dead kangoaroo! She falls to the ground but whilst in the air, sparks up her last spliff and says"dude, im high as a pie!"
She is about to hit the ground but lands on...

A banana...as it shoots up her arse, it peels itself as it is shot through her mouth and lands in the hand of the giant japanese monkey...he takes one look at the banana in one hand, and the eucalyptus tree in the other hand and...

sticks them up his nostrils whilst yellin "im gay and happy!"

Laura...standing in disbelief of this giant monkey with a tree and a banana up his nose...simply turns and slowly walks away from the giant gay beast.

just add on to the story.......

once upon a time there was a phycopath named dorothy........

Dorothy had a thing for dead animals..........

Dorthy hated shoe laces. the end

.

Dammit! What's with you and dots!?

i liked her...

ok on this thread i start a story... and then everyone else tells more and more. the part you add on has to be at least two sentences!

Once upon a time, there was a goat who wanted to fly. One day he was walking along and he saw a...

Guy with wings on his helmet. The guy picked the goat up and took off of the ground. Looking down, the goat could see lots of...

Flying Monkeys who waved and ate bannanas when all of a sudden...

a gun shot the goat and then he shot......

An agent, but the agent dodged the bullet. Then the flying guy roasted a goat over a tarp in a hotel room and...

ate it. then he got sick and puked but...

gave the remains to some hungry sharks but acendently...........

stole a piece of bread at the same time and met robin hood who..

shot the guy for stealing his bread and yelled "steal from the poor, give to myself"...

which was what he always said when someone stole his bread. then mr. clean came and told everyone that...

they were all pussies and he was going to beat everyone with his boom stick if the guy in the corner ever touched his daughters

watch this turn into porn on page 2...

HMMMMM
hey guys!
i was just thinking.....
i made up this type of game!
i will start the begining of the story and everyone here will continue it with their point of view (like what do you think will happen next)
you came bring other characters!
celebs!
etc!
bring any one!
or just continue with the same character
but the main character has to be in every story you add!
when we finish with the first story , the next person who comes opn this thread will start a new begining!

remeber the story has to be about a day!
from morning to night!


so here it goes!




Bruce wayne wokeup in the morning thinking about what to do.
"hmmm lets see"he said to him self
on his list of What to do these stuff were written

call ginny....... or was it lily?(i know she will spill wine on my face , i need an extra tissue)
act dumb
has to be in a meeting at 5 o clock
has to fire someone!
meet another girl!
hmmm and wear the bat suit(i wonder who it is this time?)
_____________(free choice)add whatever you want in his schedual
_____________
_____________

...Buy some strawberries.....


And then a madman came in and slaughtered him.


The End.

nice..

But then someone wrote a sequel to the story...

However it was very poorly recieved by the critics, the sales were terrible and a bunch of comic book geeks lynched the author in the street.

The End.

this should be a TV series!

I made this up



"Nobody cares about me, Mister Bunny," Willow moaned, flopping onto Xander's folded up hide-a-bed. She gave the stuffed rabbit hanging by its neck from a rope off of the lamp a baleful look. "I might as well be a member of the Donner Party. At least then I'd have been eaten. And eating someone else is a sign of caring. Just look at Spike! He eats those he cares about."

The redhead looked over at the blond vampire kneeling half-clothed on the floor next to the orange, comfy recliner. Empty bottles of McEwan's Scotch Ale were scattered around him. She watched as he carefully added another bottle to the tower he was building.

"What'cha doing?" Willow asked.

"Aye, missy, wot does it look like I be doin'?" Spike replied, sounding like Groundskeeper Willie from the Simpson's. "I'm buildin' a bleedin' castle."

"Um, Spike, weren't you British a few minutes ago?" she said.

"Aye."

Willow flopped onto her back and stared up at the ceiling. "I have the weirdest friends."

"And who be sayin' that I's yer friend, missy?" Spike said.

"**** you, Spike."

Spike's eyes lit up. "Really?"

"Psheah, right," Willow snorted. "I may be inebro- inmebe- inenimenieminiemo, but I'm not that drunk."

The blond vampire crawled across the floor and up over her on the couch. He leered down at her. "You sure about that, ducks?" he purred.

"I'd rather be tortured by the Spanish Inquisition," she replied. "They could dress me in evil plaid pants and make me join the cast of Passions-"

"Hey, I like that show!"

"-and beat me repeatedly with a frying pan," she continued. "And even then I still wouldn't have... you know... with you!" She put her hands on his chest and heaved him off of her. He fell onto the floor with a thud.

"Ow."

"Serves you right, you big weenie," Willow said.

Spike sat up and glared at her. She smirked. He slid into game face and exclaimed, "'Death awaits you with nasty, big, pointy teeth!'"

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Willow screamed, causing Spike to cover his ears, as she jumped up from the couch. She bolted for the basement door leading outside. "'RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY!'"

With a gleeful, fang-filled grin, Spike shot to his feet and gave chase. "I'm going to get you, Willow!"

"Never!"

The two burst out of Xander's back yard, running full speed. Willow crashed into the hedge bush and bounced back, landing on her butt on the hard ground. Spike skid to a halt beside her, pointed, and started laughing. Willow stuck her tongue out at him.

"Is that another invitation, luv?" Spike asked, waggling his brows.

"Spike, you'd have to look exactly like Trent Reznor in those leather pants for me to even consider kissing you," Willow replied.

Spike stuck out his lower lip in a pout after his face reverted back to its smooth, handsome planes. He stalked over to the hedge bush as Willow got to her feet.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"I'm takin' a pisser," he answered.

"Spike, you're a vampire," Willow pointed out. "You don't need to pee."

Spike turned around. "Oh. Right," he said. He frowned at the redhead. "What's wrong?"

Willow stood staring at him, her mouth in a perfect 'o', a red flush staining her cheeks. Spike looked down and saw that he was flashing her his bits. He grinned lasciviously. "Like what you see, pet?"

"Those African Swallows sure have their work cut out for them," Willow said in a breathy voice.

"Eh?"

"You've got some mighty big coconuts there, Spike."

Then she pounced on him.

*****

Xander and Anya walked up the driveway of his house, a second bag of rented Monty Python videos in hand in order to continue the small, drinking party in his basement.

"Xander, is your bush suppose to be doing that?" Anya asked, pointing at the shaking hedge.

"The only time a bush shakes like that is when there's people UFO by it," Xander replied. "Or it's some nasty Hellmouth bush monster that's planning to eat us when our backs are turned."

They exchanged a glance, then hurried towards the house. Once safely behind locked doors, Anya asked, "Xander, what's a 'People UFO?'"

"'People Unabashedly ****ing Outside.'"

Made this one up 2


You brought me all the way out here just to look at a crypt?"

Spike rolled his eyes, wishing for one, just one vampire friend who could appreciate this. "It's not just a crypt," he explained patiently, "it's my new digs. What do you think? Some potted plants, a few throw pillows..."

"Spike." Willow shook her head and gave the tall blonde a crooked smile. "It's a place where dead people are laying in tombs. There's not much you could do that would make it look homey to me."

"You're being narrow-minded." Now he was getting irritated. He'd been so caught up in the idea of finally getting out of Xander's basement that he hadn't really considered the asthetics of his new habitat, simply that it would be big enough for him to sleep in. "Use your imagination, Red. Think evil, like me. It's dark, it's cold, it's forbidding..."

"It's a big marble block." Willow cocked an eyebrow. "I thought you were looking into places with electricity and stuff so that you could refrigerate your...food."

Spike smirked as the young woman tripped over the mention of his feeding habits, then promptly returned to his regularly scheduled annoyance. "I don't even know why I'm asking you," he gave her a disgusted roll of his dark eyes, "you're just a silly slayer wanna-be with no boyfriend and an oddly layered haircut."

For a moment, Willow was taken aback, stung. Then she remembered who was doing the talking. "And you're so much better off?" she asked, eyes wide with incredulity. "Mr. I Can't Bite Any Living Creature So I Sulk All Day and Watch Soap Operas?"

Spike opened his mouth to reply, but she cut him off.

"May I remind you that I'm the one who's always sticking up for you, always taking your side, always sneaking you cookies? If it wasn't for me, the others would have let you stake yourself by now, you big baby."

"Ha!" Spike stiffened and gave the witch his most haughty stare. "You'd like to think that you're my savior, wouldn't you, Red? Well, in case you failed to notice, I have tried several times to bite you. Several times in a row, in fact. If it weren't for those Army assholes, you'd be calling me Master by now, you little twit!"

"Twit?" Willow was now well and truly seething. "At least I do some good around here. You're entirely worthless. All you can do is wail on demons and ***** about not being able to kill people! I'm the one who convinced Buffy not to stake you, you know." Actually, that wasn't quite true, but she'd be damned if she'd let him get the better of her.

"Well, thank you so much, Saint Willow." Spike's pulse was nearing normal, which in vampire terms was somehwere close to cardiac arrest. For the first time in months, he was feeling something besides suicidal. What he was feeling he couldn't exactly put his finger on, but whatever it was, he was enjoying it. "You know, Buffy's G.I. boyfriend and his little cronies almost unloaded a submachine gun into your sorry ass, but I stopped them. What have you got to say to that, Oh Immaculate One?"

"Immaculate?" Willow's fists were curled into tight balls at her sides. "I'm not some simpering little girl, you know. I may not be the Slayer, but I go up against rampaging demons and vampire armies too. I don't even want to think about how many times I've come close to dying."

"Well, alert the media." Spike spread his arms wide and addressed the empty cemetary. "Everybody rejoice, Willow's still alive! She's ****ing indestructible, ladies and gentleman! She certainly doesn't need me to help her out of near-fatal situations, because she's got it all figured out!"

"You'd think," Willow hissed, "that someone as old as you would be just a little more mature."

"Ouch." Spike put a hand to his chest, as though he'd been shot. "That one went right for the heart, didn't it? Buffy should just let you at the baddies with your razor-sharp wit. That'd teach 'em to mess with the forces of good!"

"I can't believe that I went out of my way to be nice to you!" Willow wailed. "This whole semester has been torture for me, what with Oz leaving and everyone else finding their true love, and yet you stand here and make fun of me like...like it's high school all over again." Willow's lower lip began to tremble and she bit it, hard. There was no way she was going to cry in front of Spike. No way. She was all cried out, by God.

Spike hesitated. Usually he delighted in getting in a few good hits against the Slayer and her little friends, but if Red started bawling all over the place, he had the horrible feeling that he wouldn't enjoy it at all. What had happened to him? Whatever the Initiative had implanted in him was obviously affecting his mental functions as well as his physical ones.

"Look," he shifted awkwardly and shoved his hands into the deep pockets of his duster. "I know that the others gave you shit about the whole wolf thing." He kept his eyes fixed on his boots. Maybe it would be better if he had at least one of the Slayer's brats on his side. "I know...ugh. I know how it feels to be bereaved of your love. When Dru wouldn't come back to me I thought I was going to cave in, you know? Just crumble to the ground and never be able to stand up again. And then I took Harm, because I thought that if I had someone, 'lighter' I guess is the word, then I wouldn't have to be alone, and I wouldn't have to worry about getting in so deep. But it sucked anyway. She drove me absolutely batty. And then I get neutered and can't even bite anyone, and I'm suddenly hanging around my sworn enemies, and everybody loathes me..." he looked up at her, surprised to see that she wasn't laughing at him, but rather watching him silently, brow furrowed in thought.

"You were the only one who treated me like I wasn't some burden. When I went looking for the Slayer and found you...well, I offered you a choice, but truth be told, Red, I wasn't going to give you one. Killing you was never in the plan. I always kind of liked you. You're an odd one...but in an interesting way. After nearly two centuries, most people just blend into one big oblivious human machine, bumbling around like a merry idiot. But you always seem to know exactly what's happening. And when I couldn't bite you, couldn't turn you...I was so ****ing angry I thought I was going to breathe fire. Not just because I couldn't drain you, but because I couldn't...have you."

She said nothing, but her luminous eyes were huge.

"And now I feel like the biggest goddamned pansy that ever walked the earth."

Willow smiled and stifled a giggle, but Spike didn't find anything about it humorous. In fact, this was quickly becoming revelatory in a way he wasn't prepared to deal with. She wasn't his type at all, for Christ's sake. "Sure," he grumbled, "laugh at me. You should. I'm just a bloody clown at this point, anyway. If any other vampires were around to see this, they'd stake me on the spot."

Willow didn't know how to process any of what he'd just said to her, but she was sure now that it wasn't just her soft heart that had always been willing to support Spike. "You don't...", her own voice, thick with emotion, surprised her. "You can't know how what you said makes me feel. I don't know how it makes me feel. You're a vampire and you're, you know, handsome and sexy and all black leathery. You could have anyone. The thought that you even considered making me a vampire is unbelieveable. I always thought I was so lucky to have Oz, but in the back of my mind I always thought that the reason he liked me was because he was strange, and I was strange. We fit. But no normal person...or non-person...would ever want me. So thank you. And...I kind of like you too. Even though you're a total jackass."

Spike smiled widely, suddenly dazzlingly happy and only slightly alarmed at his dazzling happiness. "So you...think I'm handsome do you?"

Willow blushed from neck to hairline. "I'm leaving." She turned and began walking away.

"The leather does it for you, does it?" He called after her. "I knew it all along!"

"Screw you," she retorted, but to his ears it sounded like a gentle melody. Dru had left him, Oz had left her...and no one gave a second thought to either of them. He had a feeling that everything was changing, that the stars were aligning his way again.

"So," he hollered as her form began to dissolve into the distance. "Pick you up at eight?"

*End*

um thers a forum for fiction (aptly named the "general fiction forum"

Alright, here we go again. For those of you that weren't here for the first story, basically someone starts the story off and I stop after a few lines. The next person to post is to continue the story, and the next person after them, and so on. This can turn out really funny if it works right; and if someone posts above you while you typed your part.. it's up to you, keep it there and leave it up to chance that your part is continued off of, or edit it. Either way, have fun, and happy writing!

********
Once in the small town of Turbanville, Leo was walking to school during a ferocious rainstorm. Just as he crossed the street, he hears a voice call out his name. "Leo!" the voice yells out. Leo turns around to see a cloaked figure approaching him.
"Do I know you?" Leo inquires.
"Of course you do, it's me, ..."

"...Batman!"

leo screws up is face in confusion and says me who?

"I said I'm BATMAN damnit!"

leo says.....okay BATMAN....I dont know who you are or where you came from but I'm going to be late for school.

Batman: "I came from my Bat-cave. And I will walk you to school."

So Batman and Leo start skipping towards the school when all of a sudden...

it rained pepsi

"NOOO!!!" Screamed Batman. "Pepsi is my Kryptonite"

The pepsi grew like a gold shower.

leo stops and pulls batman into his arms and says....."yes, my love I do remember you....lets skip school and you can fly me to your batcave"

inwhich leo pulls out a shotgun and says you must think im daft and the bat man says

Batman: Oh I thought you was kuniva

leo: no wrong person you wanna talk to him over there

Batman: ah, thank you.

Leo thinks that Batman needs some help, and goes off to school. He looks at his schedule for a moment, then scratches his head. "Shit, I have math first period!" he says. "I wonder if I can get Mr. Homework to do my math homework for me."

Suddenly, a brilliant idea pops in his head.

leo falls asleep in math and sumone hogs his face

"I got it! I'll have Turban Man do my homework for me!"
As he says the words, a 2-D man wearing turbans appears out of thin air, and says..

"I am the great Recycling Bin Laden. You will know me as Turban Man.

"As for math homework, blow it off and skip! "

gis all your money and your f*ckin extc and ill do your homework
in which i does and then the turban man does his homework when.......

Listening to Recycling Bin Laden's advice, Leo goes home. As he goes on the computer and brings up his favorite web forum, KMP, he hears a really loud clap of thunder. The power goes out. As he stumbles in his room looking for a flashlight...

and then he finds his good old trusty bong in which brews up and shows him the golden way to safety when a dangerous shadow appears and its saddam locked up in chain and he says.......

make me some eggs, you taliban byatch

in which saddam says what toppings do you want we have:
anthrax
plutonium
or just arsonic
in which he answers....

jalapenos and hot sauce. and scramble them, you murdering bastard...

Suddenly Leo gets hit with severe runs and rushes out of the room...

only to find that the bathroom is occupied

Leo runs into the streets frantically running around... he decides to crap all over the...

white sheets hanging behind the police station

Doing so the meter maid thanks him for the color.

then the meter maids pull out their nightsticks and proceed to

Kick Leo's as* but leo realizes...

that he likes the pain. he realizes he is a freak and then he.....

Lays down and smiles the meter maids...

who continue to pummel him with no mercy

They grow tired and bored and walk away while leo...

sits there and licks his wounds. he sees a hot dog vendor pass by and....

saddam appears before him in chains again and says...

"I should run away and never come back to this story"

Sorry to interupt your delightfull conversation but ............... Myth i need sanking!! now!! please !!

a spanking? why?

:/ ok?

why does she need a spanking?

Maybe she has wronged someone...

You know where to ask.

So Leo walks down to the local Cinaplex to see his favorite movie The Passion of the Christ playing. He walks in, and sits down, only to find someone completely new and not mentioned in the story thus far sitting next to him, who would be...

JESUS CHRIST HIMSELF!

leo was so excited he wet his pants and...........

Jesus said, "Its ok my son." He then placed his hands on Leo's crotch and said, "Now you are dry"

leo looked at a Jesus with astonishment and said how did you do that???

Jesus replied, "My daddy says its because I'm special."

leo gasped and gave jesus a hug and said I love you!!!

Jesus then got angry and said in a booming voice, "EW! What are you? GAY!?! That is a sin!"

*pleads the 5th amendment*

Batman was running after Buffy.
DAMN.She's fast, he muttered, right after he started running alongside her. Buffy started increasing her pace, trying to show bats perhaps that she was tougher than looked.
Bats was busy chasing Buffy when a high shrill cry of "EXPECTO PATRONUM!!!!!" Sliced the Gotham sky. Stopping abruptly Bats, stood frozen still, his ears searching for any sound that might tell him where the sound came from.It was definately a boy...an angry boy...The voice reminded him much of himself as a kid...tortuored...brooding and angry...
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh"Snapping quickly out of his reverie, he ran towards the scream, his leather hood flapping in the wind after him. He turned into a street,at the far end of which there seemed to be sihoutte of some movements...The anguished cries seemed to have diffused in the suddenly, cold, frosty chilly air.Shivering he clicked on the heating button on the inside of his utility belt.Just as the heat from his suit, spread warmth over his body, an ominous, skeptical, feeling made the hairs on his spine stand.He took out a sharp-edged batarang and proceeded down the ally.It was when he was halfway through the alley that he realized that whoever was at teh end of the alley might in great peril...He ran down, all secrecy and clever tactics forgotten.
As he moved closer, a rather disturbing image appeared into view.There was a hooded man, leaning in very close, to someone who was sprawled on the cold floor.
bats aimed a batarang at the hooded figure but it bounced off of it.Yes, he realised, that hooded thing was no man, it was...some sort of creature...It turned it's head swiftly out of teh boy's face and looked at Batman. It looked in the sense that the covered front of his where a normal person's head would be, faced him.
Not even the joker had ever given him the chills that he felt now.His mind was clouded was by blurred images, palying like a movie, everyone, stabbing his heart like the event occured yesterday.He saw-FELT his father being shot down...sensed his mother's anguished cry as her body was mercilessly holed with a dozen or so bullets.Each seemed to have peired a whole in some part of her fragile body, only to have fountains of blood pour out and staining the concrete pavement below, where she collpsed blood splashing as sh edid so...Bruce felt sick and threw up...on his expensive suit that his mother had tailored just for him.He didn't bother wiping it off as his kneesgave in and he came trembling to the ground, his eyes never leaing the face of teh man who shot doen his parenst in front of his very eyes...
He felt cold...frozen like never before in his life...something seemd to be sucking the air around him...

leo cries and says....Jesus you are my daddy dont you see....I love you as my father. leo starts to cry as a rejected son would.

Jesus screams, "OMG! You are right! And I'm not married! I HAVE SINNED!!!" Jesus then proceeds to slice at his wrist with a razer blade...

...when midgets storm the batcave weilding miniguns and swords!!!

...Jesus pauses from his slicing and screams, "JESUS CHRIST!?! How'd we end up in the batcave?"