KMC Forums - Trust

This is really dif. then my usual writing style...but I had this experience last night and had to get this out:

I had just dropped off my friend. I went home myself. On the way listening to ‘breaking the habit” by Linkin park. I’m cruising along down a hill; I turn up the music, and see pretty blue lights in front of me. My heart skips a beat and my eyes drop to see my speedometer, simultaneously slamming on the brakes. I see the needle ease down somewhere between 55-60 down to 35mph...I see the cop turn around behind me, and I look around for anyone to be on the road for a sign of life, anybody but me that he could be after. The road is suddenly deserted, and I’m the only car in sight for miles. He’s after me. I start to turn down a road then see that its a driveway to a po-boy place. I think of walking in, acting like I didn’t see the cop, go order some food. No, better not, may be if I sit here in this parked car and hold really still he won’t see me. I’m frozen. Too late. He drives up behind me, and parks really close to my rear. Trapped. I had already turned off Linkin Park. I press the button to make my protective force field slide down slowly allowing nothing to come between my adversary and me. All I can see is the strobe white light from the window of the po-boy place, and the pretty blue lights behind me oh yeah now another light floating in front of my head, it’s attached to an officer.
“Do you know you were goin’ 60 in a 45 zone?”
I stutter something in an alien language.
He asks more questions. Apparently he doesn’t speak alien. He has a southern accent and says ‘reckon’ a lot. He finally turns off his flashlight, and asks to see my Driver’s license; registration; insurance; birth certificate; school attendance form; social security number; email address; and car title...give or take a few...
He goes back to the car for what seems like hours. I see that I’m shaking, and I can’t tell if I’m scared or cold. The entire time he’s gone, I’m praying. I can’t stop and I don’t want to, I pray to God, that I won’t get a ticket, even though I know he’s back there writing it. I’ve never gotten a ticket before; I’ve never even been stopped before. I’m starting to wonder what’s taking so long, and even think about turning on Linkin Park again, when he comes back with my identity and a ticket in his hand. He asks me about my camera, which somehow is sitting beside me, I say something about taking pictures of the river...even though I didn’t take any today...
“In the dark?”
I’m scared...The tension is definitely here. He asks me a million other questions about my Mother, Father, where I go to school, why I like to shoot videos. I answer every one of them truthfully, my mother is a stay at home mom, my father is a Pastor at First Lutheran church and Trinity Lutheran church, and I’m home schooled by both of them...I make short films and movies...I’ve been driving for a year and a half...He stops me there.
“You’ve been driving for a year and a half and you’ve never been pulled over for speeding?”
“No sir.”
“Have you never been speeding, or have you just been lucky?”
I knew he was trying to trap ME in my own words...I said something about never speeding...
“You reckon?”
As I was explaining my life to him, I begin to see his mercy, and what he’s considering...He offers me a deal, If I go home and tell my parents what happened, He’ll write me off a warning. At this very instant the corners of my mouth insist on shooting upwards, forming a life-threatening grin. I force myself to frown. The offer is immediately appealing and I say yes.
Damn. He saw the smile. He gets stern and loud again.
“How will I know if you’ve told your parents?”
I consider this. How will he know? He would be so clueless, he would never see my parents, and I would probably never see him again. I could get away with it...
I tell him that I guess I could give him my word. It’s the only way I can think to satisfy him. He says he has my word now. I try not to say ‘I guess’ before every sentence. We say a song of ‘alright’s and ‘ok’s...and it’s over. He leaves before I even notice. I thank God. My prayer was answered. It turns out being a home-schooled son of a stay at home mom, and pastor, is a pretty good title to have.
I drove home slowly. Very slowly. I decided it was best to tell my parents after the weekend was over...but as soon as I walked in the door, I just started laughing, and I collapsed into a heap of truth and let the talking do the work. I realized how important it was to keep my word, even when it hurts, or is hard...The cop in some odd way, trusted me, He didn’t give me a $150 dollar ticket, but made a deal based on spoken word and trust. This issue of trust has a special scar on me, and I wasn’t about to take this lightly. I knew I had to do what I promised, and I did. And it wasn’t so bad. I reckon.