KMC Forums - Capital Punishment

Hi. I'm new. But you KNOW that already. I was beating myself up over how I should go about this intro thing, because y'know, first impressions are important as all get out. I was first gonna come right out and tell you that I'm a nice guy and that you'll all probably come to love me in time cuz I'm pretty great, but that seemed kind of conceited so I chose not to do that. Then I was going to insult and belittle myself because some people like it when the new guy "knows their place", "knows who's in charge" and all that jazz. I didn't do that because I'm hoping this isn't one of those places. Then I was going to load up this post with pictures of cakes and streamers, make it like it was a party because this post isn't just about me. It's about you guys meeting me, so it should be fun, like when a good friend comes back from a long trip or when a baby is born. It shouldn't be just some lame, "Hey, I'm new here." (Apologies if that's what you did. Don't worry, that wasn't an attack on your character.) In the end though, I decided instead to just say everything that came into my mind, thus explaining everything I just said about what I was going to do. But I think to best facilitate the addition of me to your family/community, it would be best if we acted like we all already knew each other. Like maybe I used to come here but then I just left because one of you made advances at my wife (I don't really have a wife but c'mon, play along), but now I'm back because now I forgive you, whoever you are. Or maybe, if it makes you feel better, I made advances at YOUR wife and you got mad and told me to leave but now time has passed and YOU forgive ME. Just know, I'm truly sorry about that whole business with your wife and I won't do it again. I'm also sorry if this was a little wordy but I like words. Oh and to explain the thread name: I clicked the box and y'know how things you've recently typed show up so you don't have to type them again? That was up there and I thought it was kinda funny.

And just now, as I was FINALLY wrapping up, my roomate brought in the mail and I have jury duty.