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pain poems
Started by: kofmaster

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kofmaster
Dealer wins not your game

Gender: Male
Location: come on mon ami

pain poems

I cant take this anymore
seeing the road infront of me
my past behind in the shadows
why cant i step out and face my fears
or do i have to keep them bottled up inside
silently..

everything that i have ever wanted i have gained
yet lost with one lilttle action of hate
i know im not perfect
i know what people expect of me
how they laugh at the fact that i dont know why i feel this way
im tired
sick
i want to rest but too scared to shut my eyes
when trying to forget all that is lost
i find its right here beside me
its hauting how i cant fight it
how i just give in to what i hate
to what i yearn
to what i fear..

memories always cut the skin so deep
more then what i have done out of my own actions
blood is spilled, it stains the carpet, it bears my hands
why do i stay in the past?
i dont need it anymore...i dont want it...WHY CANT YOU JUST TAKE IT AWAY!!!!!!!????
do i fear what i hate? or do i yearn what i fear?
either way i know one thing
..there are times for tears and fears...this isnt one of them...hauting..is it not?


.......


__________________

We hide behind the crimson door..

Old Post Sep 27th, 2004 10:46 AM
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kofmaster
Dealer wins not your game

Gender: Male
Location: come on mon ami

i feel it slipping..
..please.....
..i dont want to bleed from my heart anymore...
..painful heart...they bleed me as i were roses to them...

...and they silt my throat with its thorns..
where are you?....my bleeding rose...


the white roses of this world are beautiful
red..
the colour of pain..
love..
passion..
will these roses never know true beauty from this colour?
my blood stains and turns the white roses red
for you i would drain myself so every rose would have as much beauty as you
they will be but a bleeding rose
i am but their creator
watch
as i show you the beauty of a bleeding rose
from my painful heart...

bleeding rose...


__________________

We hide behind the crimson door..

Old Post Sep 27th, 2004 10:50 AM
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kofmaster
Dealer wins not your game

Gender: Male
Location: come on mon ami

because of you...i killed myself

You'll never make me stay.. how can someone live here?
this place is so cold...so dark...it gives me such pain..
i wonder why i must suffer such pain...now because of you my fahter...
i welcome pain..i sit in the darkness of an empty room
nothing can be seen or heard but the sound of my dripping blood on the ground..
you see the relfection of the knife...my blood is dripping from the blade..
i bring ths blade close to my mouth....i tast me blood on my lips...its so sweet..
the knife comes down....down to my wrists..i want to end it all...i cut myself...
i scream out in pain as the kife slips from my grip..the wound is too deep
i stand up off the ground...sreaming...i rip my shirt and then...silence....
i look to my wrist's....and i drink my own blood...i feel so helpless...no one cares how i suffer...
this is it...look what you have done to me...
father ...its because of you....that i kill myself


__________________

We hide behind the crimson door..

Old Post Sep 27th, 2004 11:01 AM
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kofmaster
Dealer wins not your game

Gender: Male
Location: come on mon ami

Nightskye

I have nothing left anymore
i just dont see why i do this
but i continue to do so
a girl entered my life long ago
we sheared such love for each other
in a seccond it was all but a memorry

just another memorry to add to my colection
i broke her...broke her life..her heart..her hopes..her love for me
she broke my trust..my love..my heart..
i have no one to blame this time but myself..
i carry it
always..
sometimes i wish to speak to her..tell her the things i still hide from her and everyone.

i told her everything i could..my deepest darkest secrets, no one has ever heard.
she was my hope in life.
still i stay awake hoping she is safe..i know she is
she has a life of her own..happily married.
i stay in the dark just as i always have
alone..just like i want it, cold...dark...nothing to hurt me but myself.

to me she was my light
to her i will always be..

nightskye..

im sorry...you know who you are...and yet...you will never see this.


__________________

We hide behind the crimson door..

Old Post Sep 27th, 2004 11:11 AM
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kofmaster
Dealer wins not your game

Gender: Male
Location: come on mon ami

everyone is so full of FVUCKING BULL SHIT!!!
you tell me lies yet you smile to my face!!!
IM NOT YOUR BLOODY PUPPET!!! I WONT CARE AND BLEED FOR YOU AGAIN!!!!
i will leave it all behind just like everything else, i dont need you..
i dont need anyone..i never have..
its better off to be alone in silence in the grave
then to live in this FVCKED UP WORLD!!!!

running away from pain will get you nowhere..stand still ..face it...die from it...then learn in death. I know i will...


__________________

We hide behind the crimson door..

Old Post Oct 13th, 2004 10:02 AM
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kofmaster
Dealer wins not your game

Gender: Male
Location: come on mon ami

I am silence in the dark night
i am the hauting shiver on your cold skin
i am the crow that follows you
i am the grave of life yet death
i am everything you will come to be
i am the damed to see you happy
i am dead to you and everyone that lays eyes on me
i am known as Sky
i am known as Luke
but in time you will see

Im nobody..just like you..


__________________

We hide behind the crimson door..

Old Post Oct 13th, 2004 10:05 AM
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kofmaster
Dealer wins not your game

Gender: Male
Location: come on mon ami

love is a silent white, it will never be heard
beauty is a bleeding rose, it will never be seen
pain is the rage of your dream..its never enough..and it never is


__________________

We hide behind the crimson door..

Old Post Oct 13th, 2004 10:12 AM
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kofmaster
Dealer wins not your game

Gender: Male
Location: come on mon ami

ill stain my hands with your blood
paint it on the walls to show my guilt
my pride
my honer

blinded by sun damned never to live in it
pale from the dark of the night
eyes so blue known as sky
a soul lost in the fires of hell
controlling my every move
pull the strings tight, let me feel the strain
the pain
i dance for you, you make me crawl on my knees
pull the strings tight...tighter...and tighter..feeling it tear into my flesh
they wont break..my heart will before these strings...
i am your puppet..

i was nothing more but a game to you..
does it show?...


__________________

We hide behind the crimson door..

Old Post Oct 15th, 2004 08:07 AM
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kofmaster
Dealer wins not your game

Gender: Male
Location: come on mon ami

no matter what i do that voice keeps coming back to me
distracts me
it started almost a year ago
the voice faded
but now it seems like its here to stay
months since i shead blood over my own actions
again it drips from the knife
am i crazy? can anyone else hear this voice?
is it just in my head?
or is it just a memory of which that never was?
i dunno...

it wont shut up.....


__________________

We hide behind the crimson door..

Old Post Oct 18th, 2004 10:02 AM
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kofmaster
Dealer wins not your game

Gender: Male
Location: come on mon ami

hate me..call me werid..freak, like i don't mean anything to you, call me loser, say you don't love me, tell me i'm pathetic, your words play in my head day after day. the memory of your voice, they way i told you it was beautiful, and the way you threw it back to my face. The way I loved you since i frist talked to you. Make fun of me, laugh when i cry...when i bleed, it means nothing to you. I mean nothing to you, I ask you why do i still care, why do i still love you? you say because I'm a loser. My guess im the only one that has ever loved you this much before, after everything you have put me through without you realising it, i have never left your side. But still you don't know that I'm even there. my heart is fading, my soul i gave up already. No words spoken to each other, just silence. Nothing but a freak, a loser to you, someone that wastes his time on you. Yet i still do it...

just a freak...just me...sky...luke...

just a loser...right?...


__________________

We hide behind the crimson door..

Old Post Oct 27th, 2004 10:07 AM
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Trickster
True KMC Jester

Gender: Male
Location: United Kingdom

Dude! Your poems ****ing rule!


__________________
"If clowns warred on monkeys, and the monkeys had guns, and were trained to use them, who would win?"

Death only gives another set of choices.

He who dies with the most toys. Still dies.

Old Post Oct 30th, 2004 03:47 PM
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kofmaster
Dealer wins not your game

Gender: Male
Location: come on mon ami

i dont know...i dont ****ing know...
acting like im everything to you
telling me how much i mean to you
I CAN'T TAKE THAT!!!!
ITS TOO MUCH PRESURE ON MY BACK!!!
JUST GO AWAY!!!!!

ill be alright by myself...
you're not me and you NEVER WILL BE!!!!
STOP ACTING LIKE ME!!! STOP STEALING MY LIFE AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
IM SICK OF YOU AND ALL YOUR BULLSHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
im only 17 and have a nervious twitch in my eye..too much stress..
17 and cut symbols into my skin..hate to see others happy wondering when the hell that is going to be me.
i stare at people wondering what they are thinking...i know
they are thinkng about me and my family..how is it funny?..how?..HOW THE **** IS IT FUNNY TO YOU!!!!!!!!!!!???????????????

GIVE ME BACK MY PRIDE AND LIFE!!!!!! I WANT IT BACCCCCCCCCK!!!!!!!


JUST!!!

**** YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





go away......


__________________

We hide behind the crimson door..

Old Post Nov 3rd, 2004 07:48 AM
kofmaster is currently offline Click here to Send kofmaster a Private Message Find more posts by kofmaster Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
kofmaster
Dealer wins not your game

Gender: Male
Location: come on mon ami

living in the dark hiding from the light of the day
yearning to see pain in the eyes of others
can you feel that?...oh shit....
seeing my refelction in the broken glass i laugh insain..un human...not human...as if something else.
a demon...a saint...a freak of nature..
punching the glass making my nuckles bleed ...eheh...haha HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!.....my hands drop to my knees...its hurts....so good..

WHATS WRONG WITH ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!????????

im gonna cry..but i wont let anyone see..blood...the colour red...it sooths my soul...you think this is really me?..is it? i dont know anymore....

what am i doing right now?..you dont want to know..

my hands are shaking...


__________________

We hide behind the crimson door..

Old Post Nov 3rd, 2004 07:57 AM
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kofmaster
Dealer wins not your game

Gender: Male
Location: come on mon ami

you never did anything for me..
broken wings, broken heart, mind and soul
am i human? or just another freak among you all..
holding a pistol to my head people still walk by me as nothing was wrong.
this world is sick..and i am no better....



bang...im dead..


__________________

We hide behind the crimson door..

Old Post Nov 5th, 2004 07:38 PM
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Stealth Agent
Screen Writer

Gender: Male
Location:

i only read the 1st one but i liked it alot


__________________

Old Post Nov 7th, 2004 01:00 AM
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BlackC@
Confront the darkness

Gender: Unspecified
Location:

Your poems speak the truth...awsome.

If you don't mind can I post a sample of mine and see if it's as good as yours?

I got a bratty twin-brother, he bugs me everyday
This mornin' my own step-mother gave my last slice of dignity away
My dad he acts like, like he's the boss, of youuuuuuuuu
Oh it's true
I'm the saddest kid, the saddest kid to ever walk this earth

I wish I had a car
I wish I were eighteen
I wish I had a dollar for everybody who treats me mean
I'm the saddest kid, the saddest kid to ever walk this earth.

Old Post Nov 7th, 2004 08:17 AM
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Trickster
True KMC Jester

Gender: Male
Location: United Kingdom

Kof, keep writing. If I wasn't afraid of criticism, I'd post my poems.


__________________
"If clowns warred on monkeys, and the monkeys had guns, and were trained to use them, who would win?"

Death only gives another set of choices.

He who dies with the most toys. Still dies.

Old Post Nov 7th, 2004 09:33 PM
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kofmaster
Dealer wins not your game

Gender: Male
Location: come on mon ami

you want to know why i push everyone away?..
i gave my love away to a girl that didnt want it anyway.
another beating trying to hide, another death on my shoulders..
months go by so fast..ive grown up..but still act like a kid, a scared lil kid..
a child afraid to cry..afraid to love...scared to trust anyone...
17..still scared...slowly eating me away.
a wound unhealing..yet i have no reason to feel it any longer.
is it because i want to feel this wound?..or because i know no better?
traped inside, locked behind this mask of laughs and smiles
this isnt me...

you want to know me?...so do i...
do i wear a mask?..or am i the mask?

just paint your face in shadows to hide away the fear, cry tears of a crow and never laugh again..never smile...

be dead to the world and to yourself.

the mask stays put....


__________________

We hide behind the crimson door..

Old Post Nov 8th, 2004 07:58 AM
kofmaster is currently offline Click here to Send kofmaster a Private Message Find more posts by kofmaster Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
kofmaster
Dealer wins not your game

Gender: Male
Location: come on mon ami

i get called sweet..romantic..cute..how is that me?..coz i care?..yet when i get it thrown back to my face i am the loser?..to give my life to someone i love, to tell secrets and tell her everything that has meaning to me..after everything i did for you..when i frist met you ..u were no better than me..wanted to die..you asked me if i would miss you if you died.....now you are so diffrent..no better then the ones that mock me and kick me when im down because it gives you a laugh to see me cry in my pain..if you read this you will say "pfft whatever"..if i showed up on your door step it would be diffrent..i would say things to you i never have...yell at you...scarem at you...pin you up against that wall so you WILL HEAR EVERY ****ING WORD I HAVE TO SPEAK!!!! YOU WILL LISTEN!!!!!!!.....YOU WHERE JUST LIKE ME!!! WANTING TO DIE!!!!!!!....

and now you are so cold..and you think because you are beautiful you have a right to do this to me...I CANT TAKE ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ITS BRINGING ME TO MY END!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


IM ****ING BLEEDING RIGHT NOOOOOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


__________________

We hide behind the crimson door..

Old Post Nov 8th, 2004 08:28 AM
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kofmaster
Dealer wins not your game

Gender: Male
Location: come on mon ami

is this what it takes?!!!!..
you see im falling apart...
theres no more feeling..
the only thing that is real i have never felt
left alone in darkness when you just stood infront of me..
help..me...

COME ON!!!!!!!!!! FORSAKE ME!!!!!!! BREAK ME!!!!!!!!!...oyu keep me up all night....you dont feel the pain.....YOU DONT EVEN FEEL THE PAIN!!!!..my life is not was it was before...i must be insane...

i'll understand one day..but right now...i dont know a ****ing thing worth living for..these are words that i have never said before...and they stay unsaid.


__________________

We hide behind the crimson door..

Old Post Nov 8th, 2004 09:37 AM
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