I haven't fully finished this story. In fact, I've only got about a sixth of chapter one complete, but I'm going to post it so that it can be criticized. I need it.
Sorry for the language, I'm rushing, and Don't have time to edit it.
Breathing heavily, Strapped tight in the straitjacket, a sweaty, bald, blue eyed man stared out the door's window. Screaming obscenities, speaking of things, dark and unheard of.
The doctors stood outside his door, debating to put him under for the eighth time this week, "We can't just let him shout like this.." spoke a nurse, who was indeed a beautiful woman. Long Blond hair, forest Green eyes, and the face of a goddess.
"We can not continue to put this man to sleep. It will eventually **** him up even worse, no doubt!" a doctor argued.
"Please! I'm telling you! They're here! They're ****ing with me! They're shrieking in my head! Please.. Get me out of here!" the man yelled, sounding genuinely panicked.
The nurse sighed, and rubbed her forehead, and turned to the man, and walked to the door, "Mr. Wade, There is NO ONE in there, I repeat, NO ONE. Now please, Just be quiet! You're only harming your stability further than it is!" she barked angrily.
"You don't understand! They're here! I see them!" the Wade cried, "They're going to kill me!"
The doctor shook his head, and reached on to a table, picking up a syringe, flicking the needle, squirting a bit of the liquid out to make sure it was the right ammount, "Open the door and restrain him."
The nurse, and two other doctors nodded. The nurse pulled a ring of keys from her pouch in her outfit, and unlocked the door.
As soon as the door was open, Wade attempted to dash from the room, only to have both his arms grabbed, then the man found himself on the floor.
"Get your hands off me! They're here! Don't you hear them?! They're screaming! They're ****ing here! They're going to ****ing kill us!" he continued his rant at the top of his lungs.
The nurse stood back while the doctor with the syringe pushed the needle in to the struggling man's neck, injecting him with the liquid, "This will just make you sleep, Mr. Wade.. This has got to end sometime soon."
Wade clenched his teeth tight, "Y-you don't.. understand... they're... here..." he spoke through his slowing breath.
Last edited by Malk on Nov 15th, 2008 at 08:15 AM