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PLEASE READ: Duel of the Fates
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DarthDaniel1001
Sith Mandalore

Gender: Male
Location: Yavin lV

PLEASE READ: Duel of the Fates

An alternate version of KOTOR History. And yes I know the characters are unknowns but I don't care, just read the story please.

"What happened to your lightsaber?"

The woman known only as the Jedi Exile didn't respond at first. The memories where painful ones.

"My lightsaber was...taken from me by the council"

The hooded figure she was talking to approached her.

"Then perhaps you would like this?"

The figure gave her a lightsaber.

"No. I am no Jedi anymore."

"I'm not offering you the chance to rejoin the Jedi. I'm offering you the chance to join something far greater"

"What?"

"The Dark Side"

"Who are you?"

The figure pulled back his hood to show his bronze mask. It was Revan.

"So it's true. You have returned."

"Indeed I have. Malak is dead and I am in control again. I could use someone like you at my side again"

The Exile considered. She had been cast out of all she had held dear and she wasn't sure she wanted to be a part of the galaxy again. Still, it was always difficult to say no to someone as charismatic as Revan.

The Exile took the lightsaber.

"What do you want me to do?"

"Prove your loyalty to me. My...apprentice is on her way. Defeat her in a lightsaber duel to show me that your worthy of being at my side."

A ship touched down. The ramp lowered and down came Bastila Shan. Formerly a Jedi, now a Sith Apprentice. She rushed toward Revan and bowed.

"Lord Revan I--"

Bastila had to duck to dodge the purple lightsaber blade that almost decapitated her.

"Master, what's going on, who is she?"

"She is your replacement if you cannot defeat her" Revan responded with next to no emotion in his voice.

"What!? But I pledged myself to you!"

"Then prove to me that your worthy of being my apprentice"

Bastila activated her double-bladed lightsaber.

"Very well"

Bastila met the Exile head on, their lightsabers creating a blinding flash of light. What followed was an intense exchange of blows., with arcs of red and purple swirling around and around. Though Bastila's weapon had the longer reach, it soon became clear that the Exile had the edge. She blocked all of Bastila's blows easily, replying in kind with blows that Bastila had a difficult time fending off.

Finally a deflected blow threw Bastila off guard and the Exile called on the force she had turned her back on for so long to blast Bastila backwards and to the ground. Bastila struggled to get up.

"Surely you can do better that my dear? Your a Sith, she's not even a Jedi. I should expect better from you Bastila. At this rate you'll be one with the force in seconds"

Bastila got up and resumed her assault. This time she called on the dark side to enhance her anger which in turn enhanced her power. She fired a blast of sith lightning at the Exile. The attack knocked her down to the ground and incapacitated her. The Exile had never been trained to fend off sith lightning and the attack was a painful one. Then Bastila hit her with lightning again. And again. And again.

Bastila then turned and bowed before her master.

"Well done Bastila. I see that you are truly in touch with the dark side. There is just one problem..."

A Purple lightsaber blade suddenly flew through the air. Bastila tried to turn around but by the time she did, the lightsaber had already struck her in the arm. Bastila dropped her lightsaber and fell to the floor.

"...She's not dead."

The Exile was still in pain from the lightning, but she brought herself up and hobbled toward Revan, bowing before him.

"Have I proved myself...master?"

"Yes, I think you have"

"What about your other apprentice?"

"Well, she has been loyal...I'll have her placed in a Kolto Tank. As for you...you will be my assassin. You will hunt down the last of the Jedi"

"There are surviving Jedi?"

"Yes. Your first target is master Atris. She is hiding on Teloes."

The Exile did not respond.

"I sense anger in you. At master Atris."

"Yes."

"Good. Your anger makes you powerful. Now go to the polar region. You will find Master Atris there."

"Yes...my master"


__________________

With Great Power, comes great responsibility
-Ben Parker

Last edited by DarthDaniel1001 on Sep 13th, 2009 at 07:36 PM

Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 07:31 PM
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DarthDaniel1001
Sith Mandalore

Gender: Male
Location: Yavin lV

I will probably not do a sequel to this.


__________________

With Great Power, comes great responsibility
-Ben Parker

Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 07:31 PM
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mattatom
UNSC's finest.

Gender: Male
Location: Toronto, Canada.

You probably should wink


__________________
Every time this fool be come along
He gots you noobs cryin' out fo' mom
Leave the scene lookin' like Vietnam
Might as well call him "Matt Atom Bomb"
Like his name suggests, he's quite atomic
And this fool - he likes DC Comics
Two energy swords make up his symbol
And trust me, dawg, this homie's nimble

Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 07:41 PM
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DarthDaniel1001
Sith Mandalore

Gender: Male
Location: Yavin lV

OK. By the way, what did you think?


__________________

With Great Power, comes great responsibility
-Ben Parker

Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 07:42 PM
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mattatom
UNSC's finest.

Gender: Male
Location: Toronto, Canada.

I enjoyed it though unless Revan used the Force at all to persuade Exile she's a pushover.


__________________
Every time this fool be come along
He gots you noobs cryin' out fo' mom
Leave the scene lookin' like Vietnam
Might as well call him "Matt Atom Bomb"
Like his name suggests, he's quite atomic
And this fool - he likes DC Comics
Two energy swords make up his symbol
And trust me, dawg, this homie's nimble

Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 07:43 PM
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DarthDaniel1001
Sith Mandalore

Gender: Male
Location: Yavin lV

I like to think she was attracted to him. And as for sequels, as I am starting school, I will not have time to make a new interesting duel story routinely but I will try to get it in if I can.


__________________

With Great Power, comes great responsibility
-Ben Parker

Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 07:54 PM
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mattatom
UNSC's finest.

Gender: Male
Location: Toronto, Canada.

Well that to. Tis kai. I'll await your work and critique it wink


__________________
Every time this fool be come along
He gots you noobs cryin' out fo' mom
Leave the scene lookin' like Vietnam
Might as well call him "Matt Atom Bomb"
Like his name suggests, he's quite atomic
And this fool - he likes DC Comics
Two energy swords make up his symbol
And trust me, dawg, this homie's nimble

Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 08:00 PM
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Slash_KMC
Retired Helper

Gender: Male
Location: Above everyone.

It's good, only thing I didn't like was the Exile not being able to stop Force Lightning with her lightsaber.


__________________
Imagination is more important than knowledge.

Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 08:09 PM
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mattatom
UNSC's finest.

Gender: Male
Location: Toronto, Canada.

quote: (post)
Originally posted by Slash_KMC
It's good, only thing I didn't like was the Exile not being able to stop Force Lightning with her lightsaber.
Maybe she was never taught so defend against it other people couldn't as well.


__________________
Every time this fool be come along
He gots you noobs cryin' out fo' mom
Leave the scene lookin' like Vietnam
Might as well call him "Matt Atom Bomb"
Like his name suggests, he's quite atomic
And this fool - he likes DC Comics
Two energy swords make up his symbol
And trust me, dawg, this homie's nimble

Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 08:11 PM
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Slash_KMC
Retired Helper

Gender: Male
Location: Above everyone.

quote: (post)
Originally posted by mattatom
Maybe she was never taught so defend against it other people couldn't as well.


Really? You'd think that they'd at least learn how to defend themselves against the most common Dark Side power at Jedi High School.


__________________
Imagination is more important than knowledge.

Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 08:35 PM
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mattatom
UNSC's finest.

Gender: Male
Location: Toronto, Canada.

quote: (post)
Originally posted by Slash_KMC
Really? You'd think that they'd at least learn how to defend themselves against the most common Dark Side power at Jedi High School.
He didnt.


__________________
Every time this fool be come along
He gots you noobs cryin' out fo' mom
Leave the scene lookin' like Vietnam
Might as well call him "Matt Atom Bomb"
Like his name suggests, he's quite atomic
And this fool - he likes DC Comics
Two energy swords make up his symbol
And trust me, dawg, this homie's nimble

Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 08:36 PM
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Slash_KMC
Retired Helper

Gender: Male
Location: Above everyone.

quote: (post)
Originally posted by mattatom
He didnt.


And how ironic that it became his death.


__________________
Imagination is more important than knowledge.

Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 08:47 PM
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mattatom
UNSC's finest.

Gender: Male
Location: Toronto, Canada.

Quite, point stands though. Then his story said she hadn't called on the Force for ages so she may of forgot how.


__________________
Every time this fool be come along
He gots you noobs cryin' out fo' mom
Leave the scene lookin' like Vietnam
Might as well call him "Matt Atom Bomb"
Like his name suggests, he's quite atomic
And this fool - he likes DC Comics
Two energy swords make up his symbol
And trust me, dawg, this homie's nimble

Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 08:50 PM
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Slash_KMC
Retired Helper

Gender: Male
Location: Above everyone.

How does it work actually? I mean, isn't it just holding up your lightsaber and it works like a lightning rod?


__________________
Imagination is more important than knowledge.

Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 09:15 PM
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mattatom
UNSC's finest.

Gender: Male
Location: Toronto, Canada.

quote: (post)
Originally posted by Slash_KMC
How does it work actually? I mean, isn't it just holding up your lightsaber and it works like a lightning rod?
Thats whats always bugged me maybe they use the Force to aim the lightning towards the saber.


__________________
Every time this fool be come along
He gots you noobs cryin' out fo' mom
Leave the scene lookin' like Vietnam
Might as well call him "Matt Atom Bomb"
Like his name suggests, he's quite atomic
And this fool - he likes DC Comics
Two energy swords make up his symbol
And trust me, dawg, this homie's nimble

Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 09:17 PM
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Zampanů
The Blind Critic

Gender: Male
Location: Haven

This was so much absolutely better. I liked it a lot.

My only suggestion is [again] to expand the moment- you have two exchanges- one where the Exile takes the lead and where Bastilla pwns her. Then one turnaround- Bastilla gets hit.

Could more happen? Movement? In combat trickery? Punches and kicks?

You see the point. This was very good- keep it up!


RE: Force lightning. I've never liked the 'lightning rod' idea. There should be some sort of Force defense provided, or else a lot of extra work. Raskta had to intercept all of the forks of lightning, while Kenobi drew it all into the saber. Something changed there.


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Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 09:38 PM
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mattatom
UNSC's finest.

Gender: Male
Location: Toronto, Canada.

From Wookiepedia Depending on the level of intensity, Force lightning could ground itself on an ignited lightsaber, with no apparent ill effect on the lightsaber's operation. How reliable eh?


__________________
Every time this fool be come along
He gots you noobs cryin' out fo' mom
Leave the scene lookin' like Vietnam
Might as well call him "Matt Atom Bomb"
Like his name suggests, he's quite atomic
And this fool - he likes DC Comics
Two energy swords make up his symbol
And trust me, dawg, this homie's nimble

Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 09:50 PM
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Lord Lucien
FU

Gender: Male
Location:

I liked it. Spruce it up a bit with some linguistic intricacies and it would have made for a good addition to KotoR.


F*ckin' KotoR. I love that piece of shit.


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Old Post Sep 13th, 2009 10:11 PM
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REXXXX
Networking

Gender: Male
Location: San Diego

Moderator

Wrong section; moved it to the correct area. smile


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Old Post Sep 15th, 2009 07:41 AM
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Darth Truculent
Truth is written in Blood

Gender: Male
Location: Masyaf

Very well written. I'm looking forward to the sequel. As a side note, maybe this could be published. Just a thought.


__________________
"Great men are forged in fire. It is the privilege of lesser men to light the flame . . . whatever the cost"

War Doctor

Old Post Sep 15th, 2009 06:22 PM
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