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Corran
Lucifer
 Gender: Male
Location: Look out of your Window |
cars vs computers
For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way
computers have enhanced our lives, read on. At COMDEX recently, Bill Gates
reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated,
"If GM had kept up with the technology like the computer industry has, we
would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon." In
response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:
If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars
with the following characteristics:
1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a
new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would
have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut
off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue.
For some reason you would simply accept this.
4. Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre such as a left turn would cause your
car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to
reinstall the engine.
5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable,
five times as fast and twice as easy to drive, but would run on only five
percent of the roads.
6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be
replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning
light.
7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.
8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and
refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned
the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
9. Every time a new car was introduced, car buyers would have to learn how
to drive all over again, because none of the controls would operate in the
same manner as the old car.
10. Oh yeah, and last but not least . . . you'd have to press the "Start"
button to turn the engine off!
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Sep 2nd, 2003 05:13 PM |
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)
 Gender: Female
Location: WASHINGTON STATE |
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Sep 2nd, 2003 05:16 PM |
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Koala MeatPie
Tonk's Husband
 Gender: Male
Location: Cute And Fluffy In My Tummy |
I ounce read that... Iw as looking for it ever scince. THANX FOR POSTING IT!!!
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Sep 2nd, 2003 09:31 PM |
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Corran
Lucifer
Gender: Male
Location: Look out of your Window |
Glad to be of service.
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Sep 2nd, 2003 10:02 PM |
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)
Gender: Female
Location: WASHINGTON STATE |
I like it, I think its funny, and so true
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Sep 2nd, 2003 11:33 PM |
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Dexx
wingless
Gender: Male
Location: Bucharest, Romania |
7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.
 this is hilarious..the best
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Sep 3rd, 2003 12:25 AM |
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The Omega
Z10N0101
 Gender: Female
Location: Denmark |
Okay  Good one!
__________________
"Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."
-Voltaire
"That includes ruining Halloween because someone swallowed a Bible."
"I just thought you were a guy."
"... Most guys do."
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Sep 3rd, 2003 12:28 AM |
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silver_tears
Senior Member
Gender: Unspecified
Location: |
i dont know bout u guys computers but mine doesnt do that 
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Sep 3rd, 2003 01:18 AM |
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KidRock
Senior Member
 Gender: Male
Location: |
6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be
replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning
light.
its so true lol
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Sep 3rd, 2003 01:21 AM |
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)
Gender: Female
Location: WASHINGTON STATE |
My computer does about half that stuff  it pisses me off
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Sep 3rd, 2003 02:13 AM |
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silver_tears
Senior Member
Gender: Unspecified
Location: |
i love my comp *pats computer gently* 
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Sep 3rd, 2003 02:13 AM |
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)
Gender: Female
Location: WASHINGTON STATE |
My computer is like my child I love it
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Sep 3rd, 2003 02:16 AM |
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Godshinto
GodLike ******
 Gender: Male
Location: Buffalo, New York |
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would
have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut
off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue.
For some reason you would simply accept this.
Oh that would be funny. 
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Sep 3rd, 2003 02:19 AM |
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DeNiro
Senior Member
 Gender: Male
Location: |
good shit i read that before very funny
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Sep 3rd, 2003 02:20 AM |
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)
Gender: Female
Location: WASHINGTON STATE |
LMAO, I love this thing it is so funny
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Sep 3rd, 2003 02:20 AM |
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)
Gender: Female
Location: WASHINGTON STATE |
7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.
LMFAO LMFAO LMFAO
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Sep 8th, 2003 05:50 AM |
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Rogue Jedi
Restricted
 Gender: Male
Location: On my way to the Cage Account Restricted |
this is too funny....great thread...
__________________
All the ways you wish you could be, that's me. I look like you wanna look, I **** like you wanna ****, I am smart, capable, and most importantly, I am free in all the ways that you are not.
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Sep 8th, 2003 06:04 AM |
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Storm
Black belt BJJ
Gender: Female
Location: Moderator |
8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
I' d like to see someone doing that
__________________
I am not driven by people’ s praise and I am not slowed down by people’ s criticism.
You only live once. But if you live it right, once is enough. Wrong. We only die once, we live every day!
Make poverty history.
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Sep 8th, 2003 09:52 AM |
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StEeL05
Restricted
Gender: Unspecified
Location: United Kingdom Account Restricted |
bump
__________________
-Team Mir-
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Jul 5th, 2005 06:31 PM |
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NoMindMe
....
Gender: Unspecified
Location: Gone now |
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Jul 5th, 2005 06:41 PM |
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