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for those looking for a New Job
Started by: Corran

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Corran
Lucifer

Gender: Male
Location: Look out of your Window

for those looking for a New Job

"REQUIRES TEAM LEADERSHIP SKILLS"

You'll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect.

"GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS"

Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want and do it.

"PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A MUST"

You're walking into a company in perpetual chaos.

"COMPETITIVE SALARY"

We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.

"JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY"

We have no time to train you.

"CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE"

We don't pay enough to expect that you'll dress up.

"MUST BE DEADLINE-ORIENTED"

You'll be six months behind schedule on your first day.

"SOME OVERTIME REQUIRED"

Some time each night and some time each weekend.

"DUTIES WILL VARY"

Anyone in the office can boss you around.

"MUST HAVE AN EYE FOR DETAIL"

We have no quality control.

"CAREER-MINDED"

Female Applicants must be childless (and remain that way).

"APPLY IN PERSON"

If you're old, fat or ugly you'll be told the position has been filled.

"NO PHONE CALLS PLEASE"

We've filled the job; our call for resumes is just a legal formality.

"SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE"

You'll need it to replace three people who just left.
Definition of terms in job adverts !


__________________

Old Post Sep 2nd, 2003 05:25 PM
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)

Gender: Female
Location: WASHINGTON STATE

so true so true


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Old Post Sep 2nd, 2003 06:07 PM
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jinXed by JaNx
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: Pittsburgh

thats great'


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"If you tell the truth, you never have to remember anything" -Twain
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Old Post Sep 2nd, 2003 08:14 PM
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)

Gender: Female
Location: WASHINGTON STATE

I prefer the 3 drunk women joke myself wink


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Old Post Sep 2nd, 2003 08:39 PM
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Vetkin
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Gender: Male
Location: Canada

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This shit blows ass, mate.


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Love Is A Game
Easy To Start
Hard To Finish

Old Post Sep 2nd, 2003 08:41 PM
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)

Gender: Female
Location: WASHINGTON STATE

You need to calm down on the language Vetkin before the mods say something to you


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Old Post Sep 2nd, 2003 08:43 PM
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Vetkin
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Gender: Male
Location: Canada

Account Restricted

My apologies again, dearie! Won't happen again.


__________________
Love Is A Game
Easy To Start
Hard To Finish

Old Post Sep 2nd, 2003 08:44 PM
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)

Gender: Female
Location: WASHINGTON STATE

wink


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Old Post Sep 2nd, 2003 08:45 PM
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LarryTheArch
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Gender: Male
Location: on Uranus

Account Restricted

Re: for those looking for a New Job

quote:
Originally posted by Corran
"REQUIRES TEAM LEADERSHIP SKILLS"

You'll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect.

"GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS"

Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want and do it.

"PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A MUST"

You're walking into a company in perpetual chaos.

"COMPETITIVE SALARY"

We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.

"JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY"

We have no time to train you.

"CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE"

We don't pay enough to expect that you'll dress up.

"MUST BE DEADLINE-ORIENTED"

You'll be six months behind schedule on your first day.

"SOME OVERTIME REQUIRED"

Some time each night and some time each weekend.

"DUTIES WILL VARY"

Anyone in the office can boss you around.

"MUST HAVE AN EYE FOR DETAIL"

We have no quality control.

"CAREER-MINDED"

Female Applicants must be childless (and remain that way).

"APPLY IN PERSON"

If you're old, fat or ugly you'll be told the position has been filled.

"NO PHONE CALLS PLEASE"

We've filled the job; our call for resumes is just a legal formality.

"SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE"

You'll need it to replace three people who just left.
Definition of terms in job adverts !


I like the fourth to last one thumb up


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Due to cat's embarrasment, this qoute has been removed.
BTW- Not actually Tired Hiker stick out tongue

Old Post May 31st, 2004 05:19 PM
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DeNiro
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location:

I just applied to a fast food place stick out tongue

Old Post May 31st, 2004 06:37 PM
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Evolution
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Gender: Male
Location:

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i already have a job. i might get another one .


i work for target now but it's been slow so im gona get a 2nd job for some extra bling bling.

Old Post May 31st, 2004 06:41 PM
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Naz
Super Senior Member

Gender: Female
Location:

i dont have to get a job stick out tongue muhahahahahaha

Old Post May 31st, 2004 06:53 PM
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Evolution
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Gender: Male
Location:

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naz shut up snob.


unlike you i earn my money all you do is go bug your father and he shuts your ass up by making you happy.

god i hate rich people.

Old Post May 31st, 2004 06:55 PM
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Naz
Super Senior Member

Gender: Female
Location:

im not rich

and my parents never give me money

confused

Old Post May 31st, 2004 06:56 PM
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Evolution
Restricted

Gender: Male
Location:

Account Restricted

then you probably work them corners.


25 cents a turn.

Old Post May 31st, 2004 06:57 PM
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Naz
Super Senior Member

Gender: Female
Location:

if i were old enough i would have job, right now it would be illegal for me to have a job

Old Post May 31st, 2004 06:59 PM
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DeNiro
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location:

I have to get a job to pay off some of the car payments i got for my new acura and also the ****ing gas my car takes premium and its driving me nuts.

Old Post May 31st, 2004 09:02 PM
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