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Mystifier
Peaceful Moment
Gender: Female Location: United Kingdom |
Basic rules for driving in the USA
Basic rules for driving in the USA...
1. Turn signals will give away your next move. A real American driver never uses them.
2. Under no circumstances should you leave a safe distance between you and the car in front of you, or somebody else will fill in that space, putting you in an even more dangerous situation.
3. Crossing two or more lanes in a single lane-change is considered "going with the flow."
4. The faster you drive through a red light, the smaller the chance you have of getting hit.
5. Never get in the way of an older car that needs extensive bodywork. The other guy doesn't have anything to lose.
6. Braking is to be done as hard and as late as possible to ensure that your ABS kicks in, giving a nice, relaxing foot massage as the brake pedal pulsates. For those of you without ABS, it's a chance to stretch your legs.
7. Speed limits are arbitrary figures, given only as suggestions and are apparently not enforceable in the metro area during rush hour.
8. Learn to swerve abruptly. USA is the home of High-Speed Slalom Driving thanks to the RTA, which puts potholes in key locations to test drivers' reflexes and keep them on their toes.
9. It is traditional in the USA to honk your horn at cars that don't move the instant the light changes.
10. Seeking eye contact with another driver revokes your right of way.
11. Never take a green light at face value. Always look left and right before proceeding.
12. Remember that the goal of every American driver is to get there first, by whatever means necessary.
13. Real American women drivers can apply eye makeup at 75 kph in bumper-to-bumper traffic.
14. Heavy fog and rain are no reasons to change any of the previously listed rules. These weather conditions are God's way ensuring a natural selection process for body shops, junkyards, and new vehicle sales.
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..Gotta..Cut away, clear away..Slip away and sever this..Umbilical residue..
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Feb 21st, 2004 09:29 PM |
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Naz
Super Senior Member
Gender: Female Location: |
so true
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Feb 21st, 2004 09:31 PM |
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Be@st
Elanor's Husband
Gender: Male Location: In your mind. |
These are not only american driving rules; they're the same in this whole world
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If u look backwards in your life and smile , u have forgot about most of it.
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Feb 21st, 2004 09:55 PM |
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BLACKANGEL
boo ya
Gender: Female Location: New York |
But you see americans do it the most. My father does most of those rules.
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Feb 21st, 2004 09:56 PM |
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Be@st
Elanor's Husband
Gender: Male Location: In your mind. |
So does my whole family; and family of all of my friends; and most of the drivers I see on streets; and I'm not from America
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If u look backwards in your life and smile , u have forgot about most of it.
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Feb 21st, 2004 09:58 PM |
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BLACKANGEL
boo ya
Gender: Female Location: New York |
Ok im just saying mostly Americans do it.
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Feb 21st, 2004 09:59 PM |
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Tired-Hiker
El Bastardo
Gender: Male Location: Sailing the seas of cheese. |
I followed all of those rules five times each in the past hour alone.
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Feb 21st, 2004 10:01 PM |
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Real
I have more tech than you
Gender: Male Location: somewhere far far away from you |
fine, but bunnywolf is in the UK, how does he/she (??) know wut its like here? I personally dont do that...yet.
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Feb 21st, 2004 10:29 PM |
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Tired-Hiker
El Bastardo
Gender: Male Location: Sailing the seas of cheese. |
I live in the US, so we drive on the right side of the road not the left as you all know, but there is this one short cut to my mom's house where if you drive on the wrong side of the road, you can get there faster without going all the way around the block. So, if a cop ever pulls me over for doing it, I will say with a thick heavy accent, "I'm sorry, officer. I thought I was in bloody England!"
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Feb 21st, 2004 10:33 PM |
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BLACKANGEL
boo ya
Gender: Female Location: New York |
lol
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Feb 21st, 2004 10:34 PM |
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DeNiro
Senior Member
Gender: Male Location: |
i almost got in a accident yesterday thank god that guy swerved outof my way
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Feb 21st, 2004 10:36 PM |
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Mystifier
Peaceful Moment
Gender: Female Location: United Kingdom |
RWD> I personally don't know how they drive in US, 'cos ye I'm from UK. I got these driving rules in an email from a friend. I never made 'em up or owt
Beast> Maybe these rules do apply to other countries other than the US and I probably shouldn't have used the title 'Basic rules for driving in the USA' but that is what the title in the email was so that is what I used.
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..Gotta..Cut away, clear away..Slip away and sever this..Umbilical residue..
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Feb 21st, 2004 10:47 PM |
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DeNiro
Senior Member
Gender: Male Location: |
no turst me that is how everyone in america drives I drive good and im 16 though i never do ne stupid shit
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Feb 21st, 2004 10:59 PM |
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Real
I have more tech than you
Gender: Male Location: somewhere far far away from you |
the only time people REALLY drive bad is when they see you're driving in a "student driver" car (like a couple weeks ago...) then they pull shit like u wouldnt believe...
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Feb 21st, 2004 11:11 PM |
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Peach
mordrem
Gender: Female Location: verdant brink Moderator |
heehee...
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Feb 21st, 2004 11:14 PM |
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DeNiro
Senior Member
Gender: Male Location: |
O mang i luve ****ing with those student drivers cars i will tail gate them a lil bit then when the light turns yellow i honk my horn so they will go threw it and then i can only imagine they are getting yelled at i used to mess with them when i was on my bikes also i would see one coming dow the street and i would jump off my bike and dive into the closest yard hoping not to get hit
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Feb 21st, 2004 11:16 PM |
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super pr*xy
Senior Member
Gender: Male Location: Daily Planet |
i didn't know i was that american... i do those things while shifting into second gear and talking on the phone during which i take a sip of my cafe latte... except for the make up thing...
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Feb 21st, 2004 11:55 PM |
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DeNiro
Senior Member
Gender: Male Location: |
My friend Tucker has a stick shift jeep at he was
1 smoking a ciggrett.
2 talking on the phone
3 changing a cd
4 shifting
5. stirring at the same time one day i was like MY GOD
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Feb 22nd, 2004 12:01 AM |
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super pr*xy
Senior Member
Gender: Male Location: Daily Planet |
and they say men can't multi task... we multi task like a motherf*cker... but only when we drive.
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Feb 22nd, 2004 12:06 AM |
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DeNiro
Senior Member
Gender: Male Location: |
hell yea the best i have done so far was eating a hamgbuger talking on the phone stirring and changing the radio
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Feb 22nd, 2004 12:08 AM |
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