KMC Forums - Friends quotes!

From the TV series.

Post em' here!

I got a whole bunch:

"My Lover Carol lost it, she's such a scatterbrain! but man, what a hot piece of ass!" Phoebe pretending to be Susan - Friends.

"*Gasps* Stings' pen! *puts pen in hand-bag* That he gave to Phoebe..."

Phoebe: I've written 12 new songs about my mothers suicide, and one about a snowman.
Chandler: You might wanna' open with the snowman first.

"I made a man with eyes of Coal and a smile so bewitchin', how was I suppose to know that my Mom was dead in the kitchen? la lalalalalalalala" - Phoebe singing.

"My mothers ashes! even her eyelashes! are resting in a little yellow jar, and sometimes when it's breezy, it gets a little sneezy!" - Phoebe singing.

Phoebe: Yeah, you know. Especially since it's my birthday...
Monica: Phoebe, it's not your birthday.
Phoebe: What a mean thing to say!
I'd never say that about you.

"Goodbye Ross (whispers) Forever!..." - Phoebe.

"Oh my God these are my Grandmothers cookies! *looks at ground* You see it is stuff like this why you're burning in Hell!" -Phoebe discovering something about her Grandma's cookies.

Animal Control Woman: Did you know that possession of an exotic creature can be punishable by a $10 000 fine and up to two years imprisonment?
Phoebe: Oh my God...You'd actually put that poor little creature in Jail?
Monica: Phoebe, remember how we talked about thinking things before you say?
Phoebe: Yeah, well, there isn't always time...

Rachel : Phoebe, phone's for you, it's Chandler.
Phoebe: *Answers phone* Hello you...
- Phoebe pretending she likes Chandler.

Joey: Phoebe's the one who's having an affair with the guy that keeps the birds on the roof!
Gang: Phoebe!
Phoebe: *Looks at Joey* Secret affair!

Monica and Chandler are trying to set Rachel up with a friend of thiers and so is Phoebe, they're in the Coffee House competing, introducing Rachel to thier guys.
Monica: Our guy has really soft hair!
Phoebe: My guy's rich! Here *looks at her guy* give her some money.

Phoebe: There they are!
Chandler: And he hasn't proposed yet, she doesn't have a wedding ring on her finger.
Phoebe: Wow! You're good! Hey, after this we should solve crimes!
Chandler: Yeah!

Phoebe's in a Jewellery store saving a ring for Chandler, he's out grabbing his credit card. She's trying on tonnes of Jewellery infront of a mirror.
Phoebe: Too much?
Salesman: A tad...
Phoebe: Here, take the teara back, and let me hold the musket again.
Salesman: *Hands her the musket*
Phoebe: *Stands with musket in a funny pose*
Phoebe: Something's missing. Can you get me the ring my friend picked out?
*Salesman walks off*
Salesman: Where's the 1 1/2 carrot?
Saleswoman: I just sold it to that gentleman.
Phoebe: Oh No! Wait! No! *Chases man out the door. Alarm goes off and bars come down trapping her*
Phoebe: Let me out! *Rattles bars, Points musket at them* Now!

Chandler: *Sarcastically* Then after that we can kill puppies by running them over!
Phoebe:...I don't wanna' do that!

Monica: Hey.
Phoebe: Hey. I bought your iron back.
Monica: Oh, you had that? I thought I lost it so I bought a new one.
Phoebe: Oh. Just aswell, I broke this one.

Monica: I know who likes you!
Phoebe: Oh, is it Chandler?
Monica: No!
Phoebe: Then tell him stop staring!

"I went to the store and sat on Santas' lap, asked him to bring my friends all kinds of crap. He told me all I need to do is write them a song, you haven't heard it yet so don't try to sing along, don't try to sing along. Monica, Monica, have a happy Honica. I saw Santa Clause, he said hello to Ross. And please tell Joey that christmas will be snowy! Rachel and Chandler *mumbles* Hangler!
Merry Christmas everybody!"
- Phoebes' christmas song.

Phoebe: My songs arent good enough for your restuarant?
Monica: I didn't say they weren't good enough.
Phoebe: Then what's wrong with them, they don't go along with your tiny portions of pretencious food!?
Monica: Tiny portions!?
Phoebe: Yeah *puts on english accent* Excuse me I seem to have ordered the Salmon appitizer but I can't see it! I can't see it!
Monica: It's not about quantity.
Phoebe: Well it's certainly not about quality...
Monica: Oh, you really wanna' know about quality? Ever heard of a key? It's what some people sing in!
Phoebe: Well at least my songs don't all taste like garlic! Yeah, there are other ingredients Monica...
Monica: Oh, I see what were doing. When I'm in the coffee house boopin' along to one of your songs I'm wearing ear plugs!
Phoebe: Ear plugs, or cloves of garlic?!

-Phoebe's outside Monicas' restuarant, singing-
Phoebe: The food here at Javu, will kill you! The food here at Javu, will kill you!
Monica: *Comes outside* Oh, thank God it's just you, I thought someone was out here banging a bag of cats against the wall!
Phoebe: You better get back in that kitchen Monica, the garlic's not gonna' over use itself.
Monica: You have to stop playing!
Phoebe: Why? The only person my playing is bothering is you.
Monica: Oh yeah! Come here *grabs Phoebes' arm*
Phoebe: Get your garlic peelers off me!