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Home » Community » The Off-Topic Forum » The 24 Days of TERRIBLE TURKEY DAY JOKES!

The 24 Days of TERRIBLE TURKEY DAY JOKES!
Started by: Flyattractor

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Flyattractor
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 The 24 Days of TERRIBLE TURKEY DAY JOKES!

Why all the Mashed Potatos?

Someone invited RIV to Dinner!


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Old Post Nov 7th, 2015 01:44 AM
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Nuke Nixon
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This thread is bad and you should feel bad.


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Old Post Nov 7th, 2015 04:37 AM
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Flyattractor
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Well it is Thanksgiving.

*hides all the pumpkin pie from nuke*


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Banned 30 days for the Crime of "ETC"... and when I "ETC" I do it HARD!!!
Happy Dance Happy Dance Happy Dance Happy Dance
Old Post Nov 7th, 2015 04:44 AM
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riv6672
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I never understood why the Lions and Cowboys always get to play on Thanksgiving. Shouldn't the Patriots play the Redskins, and then steal their stadium?


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Old Post Nov 7th, 2015 11:01 AM
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riv6672
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What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter? Pumpkin pi.


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Old Post Nov 7th, 2015 11:02 AM
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Flyattractor
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(please log in to view the image)


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Banned 30 days for the Crime of "ETC"... and when I "ETC" I do it HARD!!!
Happy Dance Happy Dance Happy Dance Happy Dance
Old Post Nov 7th, 2015 04:50 PM
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Nuke Nixon
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Overeating, the perfect Murican holiday.

The Pilgrims and the Indians would be appalled at the feeding habits they inspired.

Buncha savages


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Old Post Nov 7th, 2015 04:54 PM
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Genesis-Soldier
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penis


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Old Post Nov 7th, 2015 11:29 PM
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Genesis-Soldier
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same letters


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Old Post Nov 7th, 2015 11:31 PM
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Nuke Nixon
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by riv6672
I never understood why the Lions and Cowboys always get to play on Thanksgiving. Shouldn't the Patriots play the Redskins, and then steal their stadium?


They do that so you don't have to think too hard on who to bet for after you are stuffed and hammered.

Pro tip: always bet on the Cowboys


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Old Post Nov 8th, 2015 01:17 AM
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Dave_97
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Hi. A Canadian here.

Bit of backstory.. I work at a private club as a line cook iv and we did our Thanksgiving already, anyway...

I went up to my chef who had been brining the turkeys for about a week in different brines and he had just finished making different au'jus for the different turkeys.

So i say to chef " oh man. These turkeys smell really fowl. But im sure they will gobble them up" he told me to stop while we laughed.

Oh kitchen puns.


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Old Post Nov 8th, 2015 01:24 AM
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riv6672
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Nice! laughing out loud


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Old Post Nov 8th, 2015 05:52 AM
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riv6672
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What is a turkey’s favorite dessert?
Peach gobbler.


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Old Post Nov 8th, 2015 10:13 AM
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Nuke Nixon
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Turkey's got a raw deal, pigs too in a lesser extent.

Cranberry sauce is people.


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Old Post Nov 8th, 2015 03:57 PM
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Flyattractor
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Wild Turkey and Old Grandad don't mix well.


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Banned 30 days for the Crime of "ETC"... and when I "ETC" I do it HARD!!!
Happy Dance Happy Dance Happy Dance Happy Dance
Old Post Nov 8th, 2015 04:03 PM
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Nuke Nixon
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My grandad like to shoot wild turkeys.


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Old Post Nov 8th, 2015 04:06 PM
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riv6672
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A man buys a parrot, only to have it constantly insult him. He tries everything to make the parrot stop, but nothing works. Frustrated, the man puts the parrot in the freezer. After a few minutes the insults stop. The man thinks he might have killed the parrot, so he opens the freezer and takes the parrot out. The parrot is shivering. It stammers, “S-s-sorry for being r-r-rude. Please f-f-forgive me.” Then, after a moment, the parrot softly asks, “W-w-what exactly d-d-did the turkey do?”


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Old Post Nov 9th, 2015 10:14 AM
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Flyattractor
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by Flyattractor
Wild Turkey and Old Grandad don't mix well.


My Grandad likes to take Shots of Wild Turkey...

If the PIlgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for?


Their AGE!


__________________
Banned 30 days for the Crime of "ETC"... and when I "ETC" I do it HARD!!!
Happy Dance Happy Dance Happy Dance Happy Dance
Old Post Nov 9th, 2015 04:20 PM
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Nuke Nixon
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Location: Great Northwest

The Quakers are the closet thing to Pilgrims, and they get the last laugh when the technology blows up.


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Old Post Nov 9th, 2015 04:32 PM
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